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I have a question on the best way to tackle a situation that frankly causes me some amount of embarrassment and discomfort. I in most situations have a very good amount of control over myself be it my body, mind, or spirit. Now I am a big believer in not directly feeding off of any one that isn’t an informed and consensual donor but there seems to be one area that I am failing this in. That would be in the bedroom. Now as I am single and probably won’t be getting intimate with someone for a while I am trying to once more tackle the issue of me feeding when I am getting intimate with someone. Try as I might when things have hit their peak I cannot seem to be of enough rational mind to not take energy from my partner. I always start out just fine keeping myself from drawing energy or if I just can’t focus enough to do that I can at least send some of my own energy back towards the person so that I am giving as I take. However I have only once been able to keep this give and take up all the way through the act and that was with a person that had knowledge of energy work themselves. So other than keep practicing is there any advice for keeping this draw from happening when I feel like I am getting lost in the energy this act creates?

Well honestly I would say to inform them of this, that it could happen and if they are fine with that then you should teach them about the energies and if you are really serious about a person then you should first tell them all about yourself and risks of being with you. If they still would like to be with you maybe you should teach them about energies and maybe you can keep it up like that one time you did.

I agree. I do not know much about the energy thing, but I would want someone to explain it to me. That way you could enjoy yourself more instead of trying to focus on other things instead of what you wanting to focus on.

That is very true. You want to enjoy that intimacy not worry about hurting the person.

Yes it would be rather nice to be able to focus on the moment rather than my ethical concern.

Communication, just like in any relationship, goes a long ways......

I agree with what everyone has said, be open with your partner and let them know what they can expect, then you can focus on what you really need to focus on

pranic feeding is a good place for both you and your intimacy partner, I see it as not a communications issue, but as an issue of morals. Would it matter if your intimacy partner knew what you were doing in the long run?

Personally I take what I want, just like a salad bar. It personally does not matter if my intimacy partner knows my habits. If I choose to give back, then what I had to begin with is emptiness and hunger then the process would have been all for not.

If you seem unable to give back the energy, mayhaps you need a bit more attribute training in this certain area.

But hey, at least you are concerned about your other half.

To be perfectly blunt, if your doing it right then both parties are going to feel a tad drained after making love.

Unless you know otherwise, your partner is not going to be unduly affected as 'taking and giving' energy is the most natural thing in the world.

I agree with Sinora. I know you're worried about the moral issue but really, if you're 'doing it' right, your partner is just gonna feel drained anyway...And whos to say that this doesn't happen unknowingly between most couples? I wouldn't worry too much about it. Tell them if you want to, but don't feel you have to.

In my experience, the feeding goes both ways between both partners when being intimate. It's really the only time when personal barriers are dropped so completely so that there are unfettered exchanges on every level. I'm not sure your guilt is justified, as the other posters have pointed out. But I would consider discussing this with your partner.

Well being open would probably be a good idea but often the people I become involved with wouldnt be very open to my vamoiric condition. That and as for just not thinking about it well that would be fine if I didnt take on such a massive level. I mean the worst time was before I was sure about what I am and honestly only the second time I had shared my bed with someone. I took so much that my partner passed out just as things umm finished so to speak. It scared the crap out of me because though I pretty much knew had happened but I didnt know how to stop what I was doing.

The draining of energy during sexual activity can't be helped. On one level or another it's going to happen. It's just fact.

Actually I beg to differ on opinion, if you are tantric, then you may control the outcome of said event.

I will not get into the practices of tantric, this is not for the forums.

That and, I really can't advocate enough the practice issue. It's a skill, it's learned, you also learn control. You can't learn control if you don't practice. You don't necessarily have to go out practicing on people you pick up specifically for that purpose, but try practicing at a time of any emotional high. On a roller coaster for example. In an exciting movie. Stuff like that.