The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Interview with the Vampire: The Vampire Chronicles

If you look carefully at my lips, you'll realize that I'm actually saying something else. I'm not actually telling you about the several ways I'm gradually murdering Joan.

Naked Lunch

The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension

Oh, well, for a minute I - HUH? Me? Wait a minute, get that guy and give him those fish back! What's the matter with you, you can't sell me, I'm not a horse! It's just the way I comb my hair!

Road to Morocco

Solarbabies

There's a whole generation of scanners soldiers just a few months away from being born. We'll find them. Train them to be like us. Not like Obrist and their band of cripples. We'll bring the world of normals to their knees. We'll build an empire so brilliant, so glorious. We'll be the envy of the whole planet.

Scanners

The Fly

You're a clinical cunt

Monkey Shines

The Core

Right. The way I see it. My outlook on the situation. It's like getting fame, you know what I'm saying? Say you was to die tomorrow right, fifty years from now all the virgins you ever f*cked are gonna remember you. Right? They gonna tell their grandkids about that shit.

Kids (No Skynet Required)

Zodiac

Men talk. If they are men they talk. They have disagreement, they discuss these things. But you, I don't know Dutch. I don't know what stickin' womb of puss and scum and ape shit you came out of!

Billy Bathgate

Reservoir Dogs

The Pentecost... I don't... I don't know what the Pentecost is. I guess it means the world ends and guys like you and me march off to hell.

Brokeback Mountain

Source Code

I'm a good lover - at least, used to be, back in the early 14th century. Can we go to bed?

A Fish Called Wanda

Trading Places

Right. Just imagine, we'll have to wash our hair every night. We'll have to sleep on rollers til our scalps bleed. Then we'll have to get up at six every morning for the comb out. Your lungs will be lined with hairspray. Then you need all this equipment to push up the tits and blitz the zits and spray the pits! Then you stagger into class and you look perfect but you're exhausted, you're too tired to even think but that's okay the teachers they won't call on you anyway, also you don't want to be smarter than the boys. They don't like that, so to wake yourself up you drink some coffee at lunch but don't eat the food. You'll be on a permanent diet!

All I Wanna Do

Can't Hardly Wait

Ooooooh... cockacidal maniac. Ex-porn star. She's done it all. They say she starred in the world's first interracial hardcore loop...

Shaun of the Dead

Hot Fuzz

You have Christ between your thighs... only with a shorter beard.

Forgetting Sarah Marshall

Ted

The point is boys, even though I loved having sex with some hot random trim, a day hasn't gone by where I haven't thought of Tashonda. Every time I see a bag of Hershey kisses, my balls get so wet.

Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay (Dr. Howser's greatest roll ever)

Starship Troopers

Aaron, look at what you're wearing. Do you think that now you live in Seattle, you're grunge or something? You look like a lesbian.

Get him to the Greek

King Kong ain't got shit on me!!

Training Day


Jamie was Lisa's best friend. She was sad last week after Lisa ran away, so she hung herself with a volleyball net.

Girl, Interrupted

Okay. I am always suspicious of new people. Now that I know you're real, who are you, and what can I do for you?

Girl, Interrupted

A Beautiful Mind

Virtuosity

The scent of the young boys you seduce still clings to you. Do not forget who it is you serve.

End of Days

The Running Man

You come to Detroit and you rent a Beamer? That's like going to Germany and eating Jimmy Dean sausages!

Bird on a Wire

Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome

Here at NASA we all pee the same color.

Hidden Figures

The Untouchables

Better do what she says, Travis. Grandma stuffs little dogs.

Hope Floats

Demolition Man

You can touch my chest. I, uh... I think they're gonna grow more.

Moonrise Kingdom

The Incredible Hulk

I feed like an old man pees - sometimes all at once, sometimes drop by drop.

Shadow of the Vampire

Being John Malkovich

I robbed the second-largest bank in France using only a ball-point pen.

Ratatouille

Dogma

That's not the point, Conrad. The point is that "towelhead" and "camel jockey" are perfectly good substitutes.

Three Kings

Ted 2

Sure... That's probably where Grandpa came up with that whole turning into a bird thing.

Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children

Goodfellas

There's always a confused soul that thinks that one man can make a difference. And you have to kill him to convince him otherwise. That's the hassle with democracy.
S

Shooter

lethal weapon

I have become the monster you were intended to be.

Dark City

A Few Good Men


My hatred kept my spirit intact even though my body was not. As I was lost and became a rabid animal, and such is how you found me, brother. Discarded, forgotten... I have missed soo much. The force feels... out of balance.

Star Wars: The Clone Wars: Revenge

Easy A

Superbad

You really are dumber than dirt, aren't ya, Betty?

Under the Hula Moon

The Usual Suspects

If you close your eyes, it almost feels like you're eating runny eggs.

The Matrix (No skynet required)

Bound

If you lie down with dogs, Brandon, you get up with fleas.

East Side, West Side

Law and Order

If this was political, we'd be having this conversation in October when there's an election bump. This is pure risk, based on deductive reasoning, inference, supposition, and the only human reporting you have is six years old, from detainees who were questioned under duress. The political move here is to tell you to go f*ck yourself and remind you that I was in the room when your old boss pitched WMD Iraq. At least there you guys brought photographs.

Zero Dark Thirty

Terminator Genisys

Clearly there's a biological component? That these predators may be reverting back to their primitive savage ways? Are you serious?

Zootopia

Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance

I'm through! They said I'm an intolerable egomaniac. I don't even know what that means!

Sing

Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby

You know I suffer the same temptations you do. Sometimes when I'm lyin' in bed, I ache for a man's touch... and by a man's touch, I mean a penis in my vagina.

Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story

The Ladies Man

I don't mean people like that. I just mean two people who fall in love with each other. Say, a boy and a boy. Out of the blue.

Carol

Hot Fuzz

It wasn't always like this, I had a real life, once. A job.

Army of Darkness

Fallen

Not threatening enough? Listen, you take your hands off me or I'll knee your balls right through the roof of your mouth! Is that enough of a threat?

Tootsie

Hero

Would it be alright if I show the children the whoring bed? After all, they also have a stake in this event.

Nymphomaniac: Vol. I

Kill Bill: Vol. 1

A man can be an artist... in anything, food, whatever. It depends on how good he is at it. Creasy's art is death. He's about to paint his masterpiece.

Man on Fire

King of New York

You son of a bitch! You're not FIT to hold this office! You sold out this country by making a deal with the goddamn Arabs!

White House Down

Donnie Darko

I am sweating like a f*cking rapist.

London

Snatch

Patrick never likes to be serious, so it took me a while to get what happened. When he was a junior, Patrick started seeing Brad on the weekends in secret. I guess it was hard, too, because Brad had to get drunk every time they fooled around.

The Perks of Being a Wallflower

Clueless

The president is dead. Four of six joint chiefs, VP missing. Reports of gunbattles in the streets of the capital.

World War Z

Inglourious Basterds

My name is Vassily Orlov. Today, a Russian agent will travel to New York city to kill the President. This agent is KA-12.

Salt

Striking Distance

Wouldn't this be a great world if insecurity and desperation made us more attractive? If "needy" were a turn-on?

Broadcast News

Raising Arizona

MDMA utilizes Serotonin. Opiates, like heroin, utilize dopamine. Sort of like the same sensation you get after sex. Amphetamines increase adrenaline. And cocaine gets those synapses in the brains firing really fast. My product is 51 times stronger than cocaine, 51 times more hallucinogenic than acid, and 51 times more explosive than ecstasy. It's like getting a personal visit... from God!

Formula 51

Juice

What a piece of work is man. And there is no good or bad, but thinking makes it so. Human beings are perhaps never more dangerous than when they are convinced beyond a doubt that they are right. Patience. Penance.

Felon

Kill the Irishman

First of all, I'd like to thank whichever one of you donut-munching, barrel-assed, pud-pulling sissies leaked this to the press. That's just what we need now: some sensational story in the papers making these boys out to be superheroes, triumphing over evil. Let me squash the rumors now. These two are not heroes. They're just two ordinary men who were put in an extraordinary situation and they just happened to come out on top. Yes, nothing from our far-reaching computer system has turned up diddly on these two. All we know is what we found out from the neighbors, and the general consensus is, they're angels. But angels don't kill. And we got two bodies in the morgue that look like they've been "serial-crushed by some huge friggin' guy".

The Boondock Saints

Auto Focus

Captain, help me out, will you? I'm dealing with two mental midgets here. Now, when I say "go", we'll all point to the right. Go!

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