The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Dear Readers,

I don't If I have already told you this I'll heve to re-read My enteries, But I did not get the Job. Which mean all you VR fans that I Bloody Rose Must now venture Back into the society of school. College. yeah. I will be going to night classes for auto repare. its not the class its self I dislike its Being near people. at least I'll be attending with one other friend.

I dislike working near or around people not only cause Of Anxioty Problems I have but also because I'm not one to like being touched. its nothing personal I just have a problem with human interaction. any way that all being said I am not finnished with this entery. if you care for further info or if you have question Message Me. I'll try to answer you.

Terra







P.s. You've probly knowtest I sing off as Terra and as Heather. I am both one is ust a nickname. so if you want to call me one or the other feel free.

Dear Readers,

I just got done with a job interveiw. I have no clue if I landed the job or if I must suffer the rath of my mother nagging at me to get a job. but I did learn that if I get the job I'll be working in a green house. that should be fun considering I love plants.

At least I got the interveiw. My eldest sister Angela, hasn't even goten a call. poor her. yeah for me!

Dear Reader,

I know its only a matter of time before I finally crack. I’m 21 I live with my mother and I share a life with three other girls. I can never get away because I don’t drive, no one needs me for work, and I can never have privacy. My life is Fucked up. When others tell me to leave I feel like I’m abandoning my family. But what I’m really doing is giving up on my dreams, not leaving, not taking a chance. I stole 10 dollars from my eldest sister yesterday and now I won’t hear the end of it. My sister Katie the youngest is missing $45.00 and every one is blaming me once again.

Angie the princess of the family gets what she wants when she wants, people always ask her to watch there homes or kids. Even people who I talk to more than she does. She’s the eldest and mommies favorite of the four of us. Jasmine second oldest, is also treated better than I. only cause she’s Mentally impaired. Mommy always helps her to cope with shit, always lets her get away with crap. And then My Baby sister, Katie. Drama queen and fashion police. Mom lets her have anything, with out working for it. Mom let her get away with stealing 15 dollars and she hasn’t earned it or paid it back. My whole family is a bunch of stupid get what you want women. I seem to be the only one who has to fight for what I want.

My name is Heather Stewart. Like I said I’m 21, Third born triplet with four year younger sister. I’m rebellious, strong, Slow at Math, but fast with Fist, I may not be slim and pretty but I am willing to stand up for friends and at some times family. I used to cut, but After I promised A friend I would stop I haven’t done it. Though right now it is so tempting. A big fan of: Rock, Emo, and pop. My favorite colors are: Neon Pink, Blood red or crimson, Black, and Neon green. I’m into: Gothic, Vampires, Wicca, and Emo. Touching spirit bear is my favorite book. My favorite movie is master and commander. My family religion is Baptist Christians, But I’m into learning about new religions. I’m known online as BloodyXXXRose.

My room is a mess, always cold to others. I’ve always been into death. In fact I’ve even tried to kill myself. My problem is something stops me right before I finally get ready to do the killing cut. What ever it is its pissing me off. I want to die. Always have. When I was growing up I wanted to die before I graduated. Sometimes I even felt like I was going to die before I hit 17. But like I said something stops me. As you can see I’m still alive. And still pissed off at what ever isn’t letting me die. Some times at night I scream to god to let me die. But he wont let me. I think death would be much better than life. I even love pain. But as I promised a friend I wont cut anymore.

I won’t go to college and my mom wants me to be a doctor I want to be left alone, men don’t even like looking at me, and I swore I’d never get married. My mom and I don’t really hang out like a lot of kids do with there parents. I always fight with my sisters. At least once a day I’m in a fight. Sometimes I wonder what the point of My life is. Then after a fight I feel like I need to do some more shit therefore I wind up punching something or going outside and running, one time I even sat outside in the sheep barn that I built for my mom. Which reminds me what ever I do never seems to make My mom happy.

She still treats me like crap compared to my sisters. What is It I’m doing wrong that there doing right? I clean the house, I cook there food, I sing and dance for them, hell I even build shit for them but still I’m treated like an outsider. I’ve even been to a shrink. Like that help I still don’t know what’s wrong with me. Am I a freak that no one will ever get along with? I guess I’ll never know. At least not till I finally really die. But I never will. God or something stops me every time. And like I said its pissing me off!!! Well as you can see I’m running out of room on this page so I’ll be on again tomorrow to vent my anger again so till next entry…





Heather Stewart