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I may be just another girl to you but in my life I am not. I have been through hell. My dad, the shrinks, the meds everthing. People ask me "how do you deal with this", " how do you live like this", and the best "why do you want to live like this?" and I will always reply because I have a faith in myself and a faith in my religion.

A shimmering razor sits on the cabinet ledge dripping with my blood. I sit in the bathtub with my knees drawn to my chest rucking back and forth. Blood drips from my arms and soak the area around me. And tears are blazinf a trail down my face. As I lift my head and look around the tears spill onto my arms and start to sting. Slowly I stand and walk to the sink and wash the blood from the razor and my arms. the blood swirls away in slow curly cues. Tears still streaming as I let the blood pour agian.

Sometimes I will close my eyes and cry, Sometimes I will close my eyes to block out the pain and suffering. Sometimes I feel as my if my eyes have seen too much in this life. All the pain, and hurt and disappointment that has been seen through these eyes. Sometimes I juust close my eyes and pray that when I open them it will all be gone. Sometimes I just close them just for a little while.

Silent Promises mummered in the dead of night, between to lovers; you and me. Promises that were supposed to last, promises of love and laughter. But now you are gone and with you those promises. Nothing can bring you back. Nothing can bring back those passionate promises. Nothing. Now it's just me and those fading memories. But I promise this, my love is not fading away. I miss you so much but you are gone. Nothing can bring you back not even the love and strength in those promises. Nothing can bring you our those silent promises back to the dead of night.