Age
3 – My Father left my Mother and Me
5 – She re-marries to a “nice guy”, I never did like him
-I also enter kindergarten
6 – I all ready have a small fan club every girl wants to date me and every guy hates me, I have NO friends to talk to. ~ First year
7 – I have to get glasses because I can’t see the board in class. ~Second year
8 – I’m sick of the kids at school making fun of me for being albino and dye my hair black and get black contacts. I now blend in at school. ~Third year
9 – I start getting in to fights at school; my step-father rapes me. My mother is ignorant. ~Fourth year
10 – I start cutting. I believe that the world hates me and that it is my fault that my life is like this. I also get addicted to skittles this year. ~Fifth year
11 – I start ditching school and not paying attention in class. I only take the tests and surprisingly still get good grades. My mother finally divorced the teme that was raping me. ~First year of middle school
12 – I finally figure out that I’m BI. I tell my mother thinking she will know what is going on with me. She just sends me to a shrink and to and exorcist. I play along and tell her that my attraction to boys has stopped, thinking that something must really be wrong with me and that I’m very very sick. ~ Second year of middle school
13 – I have my first boy friend. I end up getting raped again by his “gang” of five or six buddies, I stop trusting people after this. ~ Third year of middle school
14 – I am finally sick of life and want to die. I get kidnapped by a couple of classmates. One of the upper classmen at school saves me after I had been raped and beaten once again. He takes care of me till I am able to go home. His name is Kohsuke-kun. ~First year of High school
15 – Kohsuke and me are now dating; His parents love me, I am more their kid than my mothers. Kohsuke has “fixed” me. He shows me that sex can be pleasure not pain and that somethings in life are worth living for. I learn that I can be happy in life, stop cutting and started dyeing my hair rainbow. ~ Second year of High school
16 – Kohsuke and me are happy together; we both become transfer students to America. I meet Kimiko-chan and she becomes a very good friend. Things between Kohsuke and me start becoming unsteady. He breaks up with me several times. We both head back to Japan and decide to give each other one more chance. It lasts as long as a week past my birthday.
COMMENTS
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markus666
18:44 Nov 01 2009
Interesting and complex. By reading your journal, the only question is" where are the cops?
wolfghost
14:35 Nov 02 2009
Oh my gosh! that's really horrible! I know it feels like to get raped, because it happend to me when i was in middle school, but multiple times over the years? I wish i was there to help you get through it all. May I adopt you as my little brother?