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This is kind of hard for me since I’ve never told anyone about it. But I guess I have to get it off my conscious if I want to sleep tonight.



I have always felt like I’m alone in this world. Over the years I’ve lost many friends, and those that I still have are drifting away one by one. I can’t even trust my own mom. I get this feeling she wants me to fail in life. I even let her know when I hear it, but she just says, “It’s to make you a better person.” Well, it’s not working.



Everyday I question why I’m here. I’m losing everything. Is there a reason for my existence? I feel I will live alone, as a drone, a waste of space. The world is trying to tear me apart, and I fear it may be succeeding.



Don’t worry, I’m not suicidal. I value life too much. I live everyday to see if tomorrow will bring me a new life. I always like a challenge, and this one’s the hardest. I strive to stand strong. I live to see the day I kick the world in the ass and laugh in its face. To prove my mom wrong.



I have to thank all my friends I do have (both the ones I know personally and the ones only online). Without knowing it, their every word (spoken, written, or otherwise) helps to keep my mind away from these thoughts.



I don’t expect many people to read this, but I needed to get this out. I can’t believe I did it. My hands are all shaky now. Its time to try and sleep. Goodnight.