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When I was young, only a child, unknowing of the world or what it held, trusting and loving, fun and carefree I was torn, I was broken, I was tainted and destroyed, and several years after I was betrayed and I lost all that I knew, I told my parents, I was faced with a choice, testify to try and make sure that he never did it to anyone ever again, or not. I decided then that I would do whatever it took to stop it from happening to anyone else, I went to court, and I Was torn again, there was no defense for me, there was no shield against the onslaught it was a slaughter and I endured it in hopes of saving others, and I failed, and so he lurks again in the world, no one any the wiser as to what it he is, or what it did, and years more i was tortured as I had to live through it again this time on a path to healing myself in trying to regain a foothold for which I could live my life, it was hard, it hurt deeper than I imagined pain could hurt, and yet at the end I have only one regret, that I could do nothing, that at the age that I was I could not speak up, I could not defend my side, the side I had thought I did not take for revenge but to block another monster from slipping into the world, I failed, and I lost, but only in one sense, in another I won, I rose above what that bastard was, I rose above what happened I grabbed my life and I rose in strength, in wisdom, in courage, and in anger, I turned my hate, my pain, my all into energy and from there I learned a valuable technique and used it to gain all the energy I could ever need, and so used it to further my life, my goals, what I wanted most. remember, even if you lose the battle, you can still win the war. I just wish I could have stopped it, I wish so much that at very least perhaps he will never do it again, but that's to much to wish for, and in trying to help others I failed to do so.

COMMENTS

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Isis101
07:40 Jan 10 2009

You didn't fail...the system did.

And I'm glad that you continue to heal and grow.

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RaineyLustfulBites
03:52 Jul 09 2009

the law often times falls to come through but you didnt fail at all

you keep kicking and screaming out to life so keep it up loves *hugs*

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ravenairsprite
16:53 Aug 11 2009

You didn't fail Laath.....not at all. You're a survivor probably even a better one then I am. No just like with me the system failed and it hurt you. Remember that. It isn't your fault.

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I have unfinished business with my past, but the threat of rape, the idea of rape of real rape of the hateful black, the cloak draped over the eyes and the twisted metal that is pierced throughout ones mind and soul the hunger that comes for peace for a death as quick as lightening rips me up, tears me down, there are limits, it is easy to pass them, you can easily delve past the hurt child who was twisted as a child, the trust given to the world before i knew it was a mistake, push hard enough and you soon push into a new person, full of anger and dominance, with a warriors spirit and a sort of calm an insane and entertaining calm that spreads throughout me turning me to what for now I will call vampire of the less fear, beyond that you will find the darkness of blood, the red of fire, and the silver of gnashing teeth and deep hatred, you will find the anger never taken out on another person, the pain that manifests itself into energy and feeds to him, you will find the edge, for he will go to the very edge of doing as he pleases but still he will hold, unable to cross the boundary, the vampire of the bitter moon, beyond, I've no idea, I have had no one push that far, but in the opposite direction you will find the embarrassed one, who is quite the child of the blue eyes, he is shy, says little and tries not to be discovered, beyond him you find the endless ocean of confidence, the easy going nature of a lifetime of growth and care that only the forests of old hold, the opposite of the vampire of the less fear, he is the vampire of the grinding earth, beyond him is a sad soul, a vampire who takes pain and unto himself into himself destroys it, his tears the pain of others for he has no time for his own, the open mouth now dry making only the slightest noise for the cry of a thousand hurt souls, for a million destroyed childhoods, and far more destroyed lives, he is the vampire pain stealer, he is seldom ever met, to push for that is a hard thing indeed. This is but a small taste of what makes up me, of what makes up one shard of what and who I am, it is the combination that makes the vampire laath swei.

COMMENTS

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Unilover
03:50 Dec 30 2008

I've discovered him, I just wish there was a way to prevent him from ever getting hurt again. I want to protect him from the world, but he has to come out into the open to allow others to protect him.



He can't stand alone forever.

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queenofdarkness73
03:34 Jan 07 2009

i swear if i was anywhere near you I would take you in my arms in a strong hug and try to take some of your pain away.

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Isis101
07:43 Jan 10 2009

Same here...and I might add that I'd like to see all molesters put to death...in a very painful way.

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RaineyLustfulBites
03:58 Jul 09 2009

I am like this at times

I agree with the people above

they should all dead but stuffer slowly

*hugs tightly*

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