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Hard answers.03:23 Nov 15 2006
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I have had friends call me the wise old owl, others a very wise soul or ancient soul. All I know is I get asked very difficult questions....so I figured as they came up...I would post some...
How do you put worth in those that feel worthless?
You discover the one thing that the person takes pride in and build on it. Everyone has something they are proud of.
How do you give hope to those that need it and the light seems to have burnt out?
Empathize if you can. Understand their position, put yourself in their shoes and think about how they are feeling. That is the only way you might be able to convince them that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I believe everyone has felt hopeless at one time or another. I know I have.
How do you bring forgiveness to those that feel that they are unforgiveable?
Forgiveness is a personal feeling. But my honest opinion is simple. The hardest one to forgive is always yourself. I still find myself mentally beating myself up, for things I have done. But it is a learning experience. To gain forgiveness from others, you must understand and forgive yourself.
How do you bring life to those that have fallen in to the clutches of spritual death?
Spiritual death…interesting term.
If you mean religious belief, that is for someone else to help you with. If you mean your own spirituality, simply re-evaluate your life. Take claim to those things you could control and understand the ones you could not. Realize that life is a learning experience and that these feelings are a part of it, the obstacles of it.
But most of all how do you show someone love when they know beyond a reason of a doubt that they are unloved?
I don’t think anyone, no matter who is actually unloved. They might FEEL unloved, but to truly be unloved is different.
Key here, is that if you feel down, worthless, unable to forgive, what truly do you have to offer someone. It’s a catch 22. Most feel that they need to be loved and understood to be able to give that love, but if you aren’t able to show that love in the first place, its hard to attract someone. I don’t know what else to say.
How do you decide on friends that are fighting and who you should side with?
For me its a loyalty issue. Who do I feel loyal too. I look at the situation and decide for myself, who is right and who is wrong. If I see problems on both sides, wrong and right, I will point them out. If I see one is hurting the other, due to selfishness or callousness, I will stand and protect that friend that is being hurt.
How do you forgive friends that have hurt you?
This again is a personal thing. I personally look at the kind of friend they were. Are they a best friend that you tell anything too? Or an acquaintance that you casually say hi too? Or something in between. I weigh if they have ever done anything else to me. Nobody is perfect, so people should be forgiven at some time. The key is they might get two chances. Once to apologize but if it happens again, reevaluate. Once trust is broken...or even shaken, you must earn it back. Simply you must prove you are worthy. Tough part is, the closer the person, the worse it hurts.
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