The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

I cannot seem to get on the rave..let alone hit enter in the browser. I seem to only get on through cell towers. Even tried different Wi-Fi and won't let me on..a DNS and no Domain problem. ObviouslyI'm on now but always ends up not able to. Seriously frustrated. Happened all week

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xRobin3x
05:12 Feb 26 2018

message cancer when your able. explain to him whats going on, and in as much detail as you can. :)

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Misskittysnake
11:41 Feb 26 2018

I had the same issue around 6pm Pacific

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Flashes at any given time and without warning. Some are maddening, some sad and some wonderful..but the good ones are few and far in between.

You already know my earliest. It is in the "Who I am" journal. My last memory before a gap.. is 1746. Two rival houses were celebrating a marriage of a man and a woman to join the houses into one. This was warring vampyre houses. High class. 1746 was also the number of the house ironically. It had a black wrought iron gate and fence in the front. A porch that wrapped the side. It was a 2 level victorian age house. It had a court yard as well with a fountain.

We were celebrating peace that night. Fine dining and drinks all around. Laughter in one room..solem, brooding heads creased with lines and smoke from the wood pipes as they talked in another. The maids and servants hustle back and forth to refill and clean up after us..they mostly kept out of sight.

A voice loud and clear yelled fire. Someone had lit a fire and the house started to burn around us.

So people know.. the drama is over.. the opposing parties have apologized and we in return. Things were said on my part in defense. Ive been attacked my whole life..online and offline..so I will say just about anything to get their claws out of me and leave marks of my own. I have unblocked all parties including all your profiles cat hun.

Those who still attack me, I ask that you just talk to me and talk to the sires to understand that no one is attacking each other. I ask that my honor be restored and my rates back up.

This is really just a site but trying to get my coven on here for those who cant access kik and things like that to talk with us.

Thanks

Despite my apparent tiredness.. today has been good. Got a new phone..s7. Saw my father. Got my husband's ring. Just all in all a good day. Can't use proper English atm. Barely able to keep awake. Yawn..random talking. Body sleepy. Brain says fuck you.

So tired of shit. I get disrespected by everyone. Even by my husband. I am doing nothing fucking wrong. I get treated like shit because everyone does not want to hear the truth. I am screaming inside. I am breaking and falling apart. I am going numb. All my walls are back up. I am alone and isolated.

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UninhabitedHeart
02:52 Feb 23 2018

I am going through this right now myself. I'm sorry your hurting.

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Ladymindy
05:19 Feb 23 2018

I'm sorry

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Walls closing in
Caging me like an animal
Murder in my eyes
Screaming, teeth bared
Fists thrusts, bones breaking

Pummeling against the wall
Maddening.
Thrashing like a wild beast
Hate filled, heart pounds

Faster and Faster
Stricken with fear and rage
My body convulsives
Limp

There is this misconception that you can be a vampyre by just being bitten or through some magick or voodoo/hoodoo. That is definitely not the case.

Oldest known legend about the vampyre actually comes from the Nordic..(Incase you did not read.."known". Im sure there is probably something older but atm this is the one that tops the list till something else found) A legend or myth if you please that dates to around 5 or 6000 bc.

They called it a Vensu. You will not find this myth online. A Vensu is a myth about a red haired woman who walks only at night drinking the blood of newborns to stay young. She is never seen during the day because that is when she sleeps. Walking the villages at night feeding on babies. Sometimes seen as an old woman or as a young woman.

Vampyres have many origin stories but in the last 3000 years.. no one has been turned. All vampyres are only born. A human living vampyre. We are not immortal..our soul is but not our body. We retain a human form but we lack the minerals and vitamins needed to sustain it. Those, we get from blood.

There are 3 types of vampyres.

1. Sanguine. A sanguine is one that feeds by blood. All vampyres can blood feed but in the old days it was only blood..we did not develop the psi feeding till the Dark ages. When the Black Death happened and the blood was poisoned. We had to adapt and evolve as a species.

2. Psi. Those that choose to feed through energy. It is sustaining but it does not replace the vitamins the vampyres lack. (you can substitute of course as needed by vitamin supplements and of course by your daily intake of regular food).

*Energy feeding is done through another persons energy-the Aura. There are more then 13 colours technically but 7 of them are main..just like chakra. Each colour represents different emotions. So if you feed from someone and see that their normal aura is a different colour at that time..take heed. You will take their emotion into you. Its not the same as being empathic. Similar but different.
* You can also feed elementally. Meaning you draw energy from the elements. Like an elemental witch who draws power from the elements to enhance their own for spells..but this not just satisfies your energy needs but empowers you. Mastering this skill can lead to elemental control.

3. Sexually. You can feed through the sexual energy. I put this in a separate paragraph then psi. Yes it is psi but its more like a succubus deamon. You get a high from the sexual energy. Its a lot more different then just psi feeding from the aura and elements. Like a succubus you will crave it. Once starting down that path its quite hard to break out of it. Because it is so easy. You work up a sexual appetite and as you have sex the energy is automatically transferring. It is up to you whether you control how much you take and in which sexual act you take it from but its automatic.


Vampyres do not burn in the sunlight. Never have. Yes we have very sensitive skin to the sun but we do not burn. Just slap some sunscreen on. Youll survive

We cannot compel people. This is not vampire diaries. We do have a better chance at persuasion but that is about it. No you cant die from a lycan bite.
No we are not dead. We are very much alive. No you cant turn others or sire them. You can use blood magick with vampyre blood and the other party to make blood pacts that are sealed in blood...but thats it. We do not have heightened chances of being charming or artistic. We learn as humans do. Not faster. No we dont have enhanced speed. Cant see in the dark.

We do have heightened senses. Not like miraculous. All of our senses are heightened above normal human range. I am a hybrid so unlike most of you I can hear a dog whistle. Or smell a pizza in another apartment. I can hear my child breathing 2 rooms away when she sleeps. I have intuition. I know when things are going to happen. My reflexes are advanced. I have agility.

Putting this journal because im tired of people not having the right information.

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Cultwatch
00:15 Feb 23 2018

Your absolute correct

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Lmao. I love how I am called "uneducated" when I have an Associates Degree in History. Working on a Bachelor's majoring in PaleoAnthropology with a Minor in Archaeology. It is paused as I have to pay off school.. which sucks. 7 grand. My dream is to get a Doctorate.

I have actually started thinking about my Dissertation in Middle School. Which is working on Correlation between the human brain and cranium size in with causes theortically due to geographical, climate, and technical advances of pre Homo Sapien.

I have a 3.95 gpa out of 4. Meaning. I am not stupid nor am I uneducated. I grew up loving history. It took me away when the abuse happened. So for people to tell me to go kill myself, that it was okay to be abused, that my daughter is delayed because i'm apparently a druggie..and that I am an unfit parent..can go fuck themselves.

I have done more in my life then you ever will. So please keep telling me those things. I have everyone tell me that my whole life. So, It is nothing new to me.

I over the course of my life have suffered.. I have not once grieved nor cried about any of my situations. I have fought. I have not once complained. I give and I give. I am not a taker nor an abuser. I have not done any drugs thank you very much and I have not gotten into any trouble.

I have helped a lot of people. Yes, things hurt me but I push it into a bottle deep inside and continue on with my life as it were. No, I do not have much material wise but I have everything with my family.

So. Do you think it really is okay of you to continue to tell me that i should kill myself, that my abuse is my fault and that it was okay, that I am so clearly uneducated.. (yeah right lol) and I am an unfit parent? No. It is not. It is pretty low of you clearly making you stupid and very uneducated.

I do not care if you do not like me, have to bully others to make yourself feel self-worth, or degrade me because honey I have layers of iron for you to go through. Layers and layers. You have not pierced my armor. I have it built up after 25 years and over 10,000. You will not see me cry. I will not bow. I will not break.

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Ladymindy
16:24 Feb 22 2018

You have someone that loves you, that worth more then anything

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Only thing ill say. Scott is in love with me. No one else. So what he reads profiles and journals. So yes. He will click on all your profiles..not because he's obsessed. because he likes knowing how someone mind works. Okay. We made love other day. So I can assure you he is obsessed with me. You have your weird fake engagement online to someone's ex who has a son. Now who is the fake whore. You have no idea what love is. Then skype "fun" to get gifted 150$ for lifetime. man dude must've been fuckin old and dry. We all know how you get lifetimes. skank.

Anyway. I had a long fucking day. My daughter has 8 teeth in..has a super bad diaper rash so she's grumpy. Dealing with your bullshit and then moving shit..plus,waiting on over 6g taxes to hsve some relief

ontop I'm fucking empathic. Heyoka Empath and I am one pissed off goddess. So seriously fuck off people. Otherwise jump off a cliff.

Drugs. That us the best you can do. Nah. I hate drugs. Don't smoke. Don't deal. Don't anything. Yeah. we girls do exist. Again. I'm in sd if you wish to meet your maker and ur death wish.

Seriously your funny lol. Oh my I'm dying of laughter because I know your secretly crying. Idk why you exist. your a mistake. Idc about online coven. My coven that I run in life..oh honey u don't know what we can do. adios. dumb cunt.

You don't know me. *shrugs* Anyone that sees our BEAUTIFUL AND SMART daughter will just fall in love with her too. At 11 months she identified colours. That append at age 2. She is wonderful and happy. All smiles. My parenting is on point. In actuality I have never cheated. My love is my first and only.

That means I am very loyal and honest. I am blunt. Honest. Ballsy. Head strong. Hella smart. Attractive. I know what it is like to barely make it. I have been at Deaths door. I have starved. I have had nothing. I have suffered more then you will ever know and I am still here.

Do you know what it feels like to have your body violated. Beaten till bones break. To be held underwater by the man who is supposed to be your father. To be kidnapped. Forced to perform at 4 years old. To get beaten and blamed at 4 when my cousin tried to violate me.

To have a shit ton of pills down your throat. To be locked in the white room. To live a thousand miles away from your family to be fixed.

To not have enough money to keep the lights on. to feed yourself when your pregnant. People bullying you. hitting you. Taking everything away from you.

25 years of rage inside. So please. come knock on my door. I will make you fear me. You will drop and not wake up. I dare you. South Dakota you bitch. Find me and see what a Goddess can do.

I am elemental so the ground will shake in my anger. The sky will clap and rain with my tears of hate. The wind will scream as I scream and it will be heard all over the world.

I dare you. I fucking dare you little girl. I will eat you alive. Your soul I will pull out from your body and I will consume it. I am deamon. You? Stupid.

All it is..is just numbers. We all can count. You really do not scare me..well maybe with your 300lb weight..scared u could break someone by sitting on them. You are so ugly. I threw up legitimatly when I saw your pictures. No wonder nobody wants to fuck you. You would crush the breath out of the poor dude.

Showing ur body on cam just to get gifted premium profiles is just sad. You can't even think for yourself. What is the highest degree you have? 4th grade? Shit...that explains EVERYTHING.

You have to bully to make yourself feel better but in honesty you really are not damaging me. Omg I'm so scared ur negative my honor and profile. So scary. oooh. I'm gonna cry.

Shit. Woman up. You can't do shit to me. You'll get what is coming to you eventually. Karma is a fucking bitch. Online? Karma doesn't happen. Watch cuz of your weight ull die before age 60 and I will smile because I'll be escorting you down Styx. You my dear..are not going to the happy place.

You hurt people and I will enjoy torturing you for eternity.

Seriously people. Why the drama when you don't really know me. At all. You are just jealous I have people in real life that love me and my body is fucking sexy as hell. Sorry sweetie you are definitely not.

I don't understand why all of you don't see who she really is. My dear cow..you merely are only just a human. Nothing special. Please continue to cut yourself because humanity would be better off without you..

Oh yeah. I know everything. I am tired of your drama. You and ur two friends with all your profiles. I am a real woman who has the balls to challenge you when you are in thr wrong.

Trust me honey. If you were 2 feet in front of me..you'd piss yourself and I would just laugh at your sorry ass. You don't have what it takes to face me.

So these games u play online..That's all they are. Games. You only have this one little life. You are nothing compared to me. You and your friends.

Go ahead. Do your worst. I will persevere.

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LadyMinde
00:25 Feb 21 2018

Your right they are jealous. and make up stories

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LadyMinde
00:26 Feb 21 2018

They catfish with there 50 profiles. They have no life.

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Awesome. My other profile is now blinded. Not awesome. Shit people. I honestly did not do shit. It is really depressing to know I really do not have a friend on here that I thought I did.. Thanks I guess. Strip it all away from me all for standing up for myself...

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LadyMinde
22:38 Feb 20 2018

Every time I write a poem, the cockroaches put give me negativity honor

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LadyMinde
22:40 Feb 20 2018

Let's be friends

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Lithilian
22:41 Feb 20 2018

Yeah, I know. I got it worse though. Over miscommunication and i get attacked and called names. It was too point i was getting so depressed i wanted to pop all my pills just to go back to feeling numb. Ive been bullied my entire life and So if shit starts. I will defend myself.

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Other than my human mask, I am something far more deadly. I woke in a place where Time did not yet exist. There was no Suns, no Moons, no Stars or Galaxies. Just nothing. A Void if you please. There was no concept of Time, matter or space.

I was not created. I was as I am and always will be now and forever. I could not see anything as I had no eyes. No hands to touch. No nose to smell and no voice to speak. I was bodyless.

I was existing in a place where there was no existence. Surrounded by the Darkness. It was.. somehow familiar. Right. I had a conciousness yes. That is it.

Collided we did. Tendrils of Dark throughout me wrapping me up. Penetrating. No concept of pain. What I felt first was the Coldness. It was so cold.

Constant and I erupted in euphoria ectasy; feeling the energy pulsate through my conciousness and I woke.

Love flooded through me like the waves slamming against the shore and spraying upward with a force not to be reckoned with. Light became a form.

The two became one in immortal creation. Seperate but one. Thus birthed Time from our union.

Anyone else having issues this snowy morning. I can only get on thru my Verizon towers not Internet. I did get on with Internet just now but it took 10 tries. On towers..I can get on easily. I can't on my laptop either. It tells me No Domain. No DNS server. Any ideas?

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Lithilian
19:39 Feb 20 2018

I like how it posted twice.

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Anyone else having issues this snowy morning. I can only get on thru my Verizon towers not Internet. I did get on with Internet just now but it took 10 tries. On towers..I can get on easily. I can't on my laptop either. It tells me No Domain. No DNS server. Any ideas?

Originally named the Coven of the Seven Immortals; the Guardians of the White Flame was initially founded in 2014 by Scott and Lilithian in high hopes to bring together people of all kin-types. We officially changed the name to Guardians of the White Flame in 2016 when we brought Sora on-board.


Our goal is to create a safe environment where people of all kin-types can come to learn, grow, and feel at home without any regard to race, sex, orientation, religion or disabilities. We aim to empower individuals so they can stand on their own and continue to grow as a person both intellectually and spiritually.


You will learn to balance yourself through meditation, energy manipulation, crystal work and much more. We have Elders whom can help you understand who you are and overcome your obstacles by guiding you through your strengths and weaknesses. As a coven, we are also a family-we protect our own and each other through support and defense.


~Founder and Head of the Coven. This is a very real coven outside of the Rave and if you feel like you wish to be apart of this.. contact either I or Erebusthedead for more info.

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ErebustheDead
06:26 Feb 20 2018

Straight up

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I am taking a friend's advice and im just going to ignore it all. De rate. De honor. it is okay. After this journal I am no longer going to be your play thing. You are hereforth ignored. I wont be dragged into your drama anymore. Have a great life and good bye

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Sangomancer
23:32 Feb 19 2018

why should she undo her blocks her 1 or 2 blocks is nothing compared to the ton she has got, the negative honor she has recieved that they left there rude comments in, the rates that they commented belittling her..Its nowhere near even to give in to bully tactics. Its a social site. People are gonna look at your profile, they are gonna rate , read, honor whatever. Yes the drama is petty , but not even by any means.

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Lithilian
02:34 Feb 20 2018

Thanks sang

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Look. I do not like fighting. I really hate it. I am more of a peaceful mindset. Yes, I will roar and I will fight if my integrity, family, and self worth is in jepordy. I will also fight for others. Does not mean I enjoy it. I have seen war. I have fought them as well both between nations and between a few people trying to end it. Trying to be the medium and sometimes losing. Im not saying I lost. Im saying.. I am tired of fighting on a stupid website over miscommunication. Literally, this is what all this is about. Miscommunication and you feeling you need everyone to bow to you. Well. I will not bow.

Im sorry you feel the need to justify yourself and enslave people to love you when they really dont. Im sorry your so called best friends are only your friends probably through blackmail. Im sorry you are the way you are. Im sure things have happened to get you to this point.

Yeah you probably have a past just as well and we probably actually have things in common. But manipulating people and trying to be a bully because you were bullied is not how you handle life. You have problems. I have problems.. shit we all have problems somewhere. Dont say you dont.. I know better.

Im sure you have good qualities about yourself but the way you act and making yourself who you really are not.. is a balloon that needs to be popped. Im sure under your fake exterior you might actually have a heart that you close up because of the shit you went through

Ive been there. Trust me. No. I dont like you. I probably never will but right now it is because how you act. Stop thinking you are top dog..you really are not. You are a sad woman with a long life ahead of her who does not think better of herself.

Now. I would like this drama to stop. I really would. All I want is civilness from you. No more rating 1. Fix my honor because I am honorable. Stop harassing my husband and dont ever say shit again about my daughter..then maybe we can have a civil conversation. Without you enflating yourself to something your not.

Whatever happened to you before.. I truly am sorry. Whatever your past.. im sorry. Everyone who tries, does deserve some good to them.

If you honestly cannot see me trying to be civil and understanding because I really do relate in some ways..and still continue to harass and bully..then maybe you just not a good person.

You do not get to touch me nor my profile. You need to back the fuck off. I am tired of your bullshit. All you do is lie, cheat, and bully people. All because you have nothing better to do. You have no fucking life.

I am a mother of a beautiful and smart 1 year old. She was born March 21st.. 2:30pm at 8lbs 21 oz after 30 fucking hours with no drugs..all natural. She is a little delayed because she had to wear a helmet that inhibited her mobile ability. Meaning since your fucking stupid..her head was flat for a little while. Now its all better. She stands and crawls and has the bluest eyes you will ever see.

I am a strong woman of 25 years. I am engaged to be married next year on Halloween. My dress is 100% custom made. I have over 50 people showing up so yes people do care about me.

I am hella smart. At 16 years I helped a rocket engineer switch his formula around for a more fuel effecient boosters. So fuck you bitch

I nearly finished a bachelors degree in 3 years. It takes 4. I already been thinking about a dissertation since high school and that is a doctorate degree

I have suffered the sexual and mental and physical abuse for 6 fucking years and i still fight

I have seen death countless of times.

Im also an awakening hybrid. So please bitch come at me. I swear to god if you were here id knock you the fuck down because you are nothing. I am a hell of a lot more stronger then you ever will be

I work twice as hard to get where I am today and dont ever tell me im nothing you fucking cunt. You have no idea who I am.

I have done more then you ever can. I became an adult at 6 years of age. wtf were you doing? shoving your fat ass full of candy. So DO NOT TELL ME WHO THE FUCK I AM AND GET THE FUCK OFF BITCH

I really do not care anymore. I really fucking dont. I am a damn good person but people ruin whatever good there is. No wonder you are all fucking doomed on this planet. Ive seen enough ages of war, hate and disease. I really hope you die or kill yourself. it would make me happy.

Spirling down in a dizzying dismay
Curled in a ball of black flame
blood dripping from my fingertips
tearing out my heart with a cry of war

descending upon you
i tear into your flesh
opening the fountain of life
gorging myself unable to stop
entwined in your hair my hand

with a sharp snap it comes off
your head upon my spear
letting out a cry of victory
standing upon your corpse.

First of all. I can speak and write in the English language very well. You cannot because you never finished schooling it seems. You are a unschooled, pathetic, retarded, vain, ugly cunting whore.

I have a Iq of 165 with a g.p.a of 3.95. Meaning I am in the Phi Theta Honor's International Club. Which Limit its members. So Please. :)

When you type, you never finish your sentences. You constantly misspell every word. You should know you use contractions. So words like "dont" and "cant" should correctly be used as such: "Don't" , "Can't". These words without the apostrophe are invalid words. With it they read Do not. and Cannot. If you actually went to school you would know this.

New is not spelled "newe" its New.

I was grading and correcting college papers in high school. Where were you during this? Probably partying and getting drugged up. You have not accomplished anything in your life. I have been to South America and got featured in a Archeology Journal with my findings.

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Agdistis
23:50 Feb 18 2018

The English language is pretty flexible.

Most people who critique grammar are actually attempting to make an effort to critique social class.

Funnily enough, now that I write for a living I'm way more easy-going about English. Most of the other professionals I know are that way too, especially in an informal (i.e. unpaid) context.

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Lithilian
23:53 Feb 18 2018

Oh, I understand. I just was giving her a hard enough time because she chooses to play into my games. What do you write? :) My mother is writing a book..when she has time. She teaches 4 classes and manages 160 students in a 4 hour block time. She should find the time though. lol

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Agdistis
21:16 Feb 19 2018

I mostly write ad and sales copy for a living. Nothing sexy. lol

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Seriously. It is not that scary to be blinded in a coven or tortured if you will. This is online and you really cant harm me. I dont know why you do this drama thing sweetie. I am nowhere near dumb. Remember my iq is way higher then yours. You can do whatever you want and Im not gonna stoop to your level dearie. Anyways i wasted enough time on you. Onward to my happier life then yours :D

Im not playing this game with you and your friends honey. Im sorry you feel the way you do and that Im actually quite chill about it. I am a mother with a shit ton of life experience. I dont get to be dramatic. i get to continue on with my life because you are not worth the time. I am getting married and I have a lot of stress coming up.

My story?

I was abused since i was born for the first six years of my life. By my Biological father. I was Molested, Beaten, taken from my mother (literally kidnapped), tried to kill me and mental abuse. I am a 25 year old woman who never had a childhood. I was put in homes and on medication to fix me. I never grieved. Never cried. I was angry.

It took me 25 years to control myself. I grew up with hardly nothing. I have no friends. I have disorders and disabilites but i will be damned. I have an iq of 165. So dont play the victim and stupid card with me honey because you do not know what I am capable of.

I got pregnat at 23. Doctor's told me I was not supposed to (no nothing wrong with my fertility) but at the time i was sick. My immune system was not working and for 3 months i was very sick. Now i have to live almost white gloved. Meaning when I kiss my child or hold her I have to wash my hands first and sanatize them every time and worry about her getting my sickness.

These diseases i did not get through sex or contact but because my body started to stop working. I live a life of feeling disgusted with myelf and nobody wants to be near me. I get called a walking disease.

I am also part of a native american tribe. I am known as... She who walks head first into battle. I am the fox and the wolf of the Eastern Cherokee Bear clan. My step father's family. I always got told by outsiders that I am a lie.

I have lost so much, fought for so long and you are nothing but a fly on my windsheild. I find a man who loves me in a way a true woman should be loved and finds me extremely attractive. So your games and drama that you wish to play.. go ahead play it. I survived much worse. You are easy.

Things still not too great today... like the walls are closing in and I just want to scream. But I can't. Just keep my head down, mouth shut and myself not visible. Or get yelled at again. Must've did something wrong again. 2 fights in a row. Tired of it. Don't need to be taken out on. It hurts. emotionally. I do try you know. I even got you an interview somewhere else and I get yelled at.

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UninhabitedHeart
23:38 Feb 17 2018

💖

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Lithilian
23:52 Feb 17 2018

why the heart.

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Bad day. Got into a stupid fight that turned into something much deeper. I realized..that..I never allowed myself to grieve over..myself. I kept on trucking. I was abused in every sense of the word growing up and I never cried about it. Not really.

Never broke down. Never..yeah. I was traumatized and a whole slew of ptsd and other things came about. Got into a fight with my husband over changing a diaper and that was it..

I snapped and it all came back. The fear. The hurt. The anger. I lashed. I clawed myself till I bled.. he came in and held me . I hit him. I scratched. Screamed. All my walls went down at once and I couldn't breathe. I was gasping for breath.

He just fought my arms down and wrapped himself around me and just held me silently and the numbness took over. Dead weight. Staring off into nothing. Tears rolling down my cheeks. No words. Just grief.

It has been 25 years.. or will be in May. I have faced it. Suffered through it since I took the first breath in my young lungs. Now.. I broke.

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LianTheWerewolfQueen
02:26 Feb 17 2018

oh wow...

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Lithilian
02:52 Feb 17 2018

Yeah

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KatherinexArduxBloodwolf
04:36 Feb 17 2018

:'(

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Seems to be spiraling into destruction no matter how hard I try to save it. It is one thing after another. Just a shitty day

dedicated to a diabolical, egotistical and narcissistic asshole who is just too funny ;) Old man he is; and so very unfunny and really quite depressing as he seems to be out to rue the day. Lifeless and loveless, yet he preaches like the pastor from hell. Unmarried, childless and possibly infertile..butttttt.. I dont think anyone wants to carry on his genes. He does not know how to love nor can he be loved as many have come his way but were disgusted by the mere sight of him. Yes, I am just downright plain mean, brutal and just enjoying this but you hold a personal grudge against me because I was uninterested in someone 20 years older then I. I am happily getting married next year and I bore a child-a daughter. My own little minion. Now I have said my piece. Probably will spark plenty of arguments and I really do not care. Dont have to comment because it is really sad how people do get so offended so easily instead of having a pair of balls and brains.

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KatherinexArduxBloodwolf
18:30 Feb 16 2018

OK...I'm beyond baffled

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Lithilian
01:52 Feb 17 2018

The annoying p dude we talked about thru Erebus messages.

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I am not fully accepting this part of myself because it is hard to accept the part that at one point-was and still is cruel. I relished the pain given and was enthralled in the thrill at giving the pain in return. It is a secret dark fire that stirs deep in my loins. Like an orgasm

Drowning in your sorrows, hate and rage fuels me. I laugh at your tears and whip the flesh off of your back till driven to the bone. You love me, hate me and desire me in your darkest places. You worship me and the thought of getting into your darkest fantasies makes it consuming.

I have a soft side. It is almost like a split personality but it is all me.. I am just afraid on the surface to let my fiend come out to play. Of hurting you because I like the nails in the back making me bleed, the bite marks all over my body bruising me as you push me over the edge making damn sure im yours over and over and no one can touch me.

I hide this side in fear of rejection. Lilith was not all bad. No. It happened because you left after the wars or was taken. I fell into a despair..of anguish.. i fell into a downward spiral of a never-ending abyss in which i did not fully recover from. So forgive my sins of jealousy and envy to find a reason of self acceptance.