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SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): The World Cow Chip Throwing Contest will be held this week in Beaver, Oklahoma. If you've got the time and inclination, I suggest you attend. It would be especially fortuitous if you not only watched the festivities, but also got a chance to compete. One way or another, Scorpio, you're going to have urges to sling dung--either the metaphorical or actual variety--and it would be far better to do it in a setting where such activity is sanctioned. That way, no reputations will be tweaked and no one will get hurt. If you can't make it to Beaver, Oklahoma, you should maybe arrange your own Cow Chip Throwing

Contest in the nearest pasture. If you're an urban dweller, it would be worth driving out to the sticks.



FREE WILL ASTROLOGY

Week beginning April 14

Copyright 2005 by Rob Brezsny

http://www.freewillastrology.com

At work last night, I had Burger King for dinner. [cuz I left my "real" dinner on the kitchen counter.] Eating Burger King made me want to puke. I told my 3 managers that I was going to go to the first floor [ I work on the fourth floor] and get a ginger ale [the only thing that'll settle my stomach.] They said "no you're not" [I think they were just fucking with me.] I said "OK, then when I have to puke, I'm going to do it over here between the three of you." One of them looked at me and said "GO!" Can you get fired for saying stuff like that? I have this horrible feeling one of these days my smart assedness will get me fired.



Long story short......too late!!! Even though the dinner was gross, I still had a ton of pep and energy and was looking forward to dancing the night away.



Upon walking into RSC the God of a DJ starts playing Peek-A-Boo. I go straight for the dance floor, throw my purse to the ground and get down to boogy wooogy woogy. Fuck saying hello to people, I need to dance. This is my religion. This is how I worship and I really really needed to pray. I think the Goddess was happy with my dance that night.



I'm sitting down talking to Gothichappiness and walkingparty. I get up to go to the bar and get a drink. Half way there I freeze. Out of the corner of my eye I see someone. It slowly seeps in. He looks like a guy from my past. A guy who used to go to The Foundations. He got hit while riding his bike and passed away many moons ago. I hadn't thought about him in years. I can go to Arizona, Pennsylvania, Ireland, Mexico... it doesn't matter the ghost will still follow me.



So I dance some more. I dance to remember. I dance to forget. I dance to make my Goddess happy. Then I have to walk it off. I go around back and start to head for the door to go back inside. There is a guy trying to come in. He steps aside and bows. I said "A true gentleman" He holds out his arm for me. I link mine in his. He says he is a true English gentleman and he has the accent to prove it. We walked by Gothichappiness and Walkingparty. I think they both called my name so I went over there. They ask "Who is that guy?" I shrug and say "I don't know" I got a chaperon for the rest of the night. *blink, blink* I wasn't going to get into any trouble. I swear. I'm just a sweet and innocent little girl.



*sigh* Dangerous moods can be dangerous. *sardonic smiles*



I go up to the dj and tell him that I love him and that he is kicking my ass tonight. He said "I get paid to do this." I said "I'd pay you to do it." He smiled.



It was a good night...