The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Today some stupid girl in pink [figures] asked me if I have fangs. Well, being a smart a**, I smiled at her. She told me they were only a little longer than regular teeth. I smiled wider and said "they extend when entering flesh." Then she said that my eyes weren'y the right color to be vampire eyes. I took out my green contacts and asked "is that better?" She almost tripped over her one sandals when she saw my eyes. That was basically the greatest part of my day.

Apparently she doesn't appreciate the color black...