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Her eyes have been swallowed by the blood,

That these broken wings protect,

And though shes been forced to eat this mud ,

Her eyes of truth reflect,

Alone, the colors raining threw her veins,

And the vibes dancing in every faded heart beat,

In the glass, her image torn to broken,

As her secluded blood falls to her feet,

Ive seen the face of death,

Ive seen the face of suicide,

Ive seen the face of Lucifer,

Standing by my side,

Ive seen the face of evil,

Ive seen the face of pain,

Ive seen the face of hate,

Thats driving me insane,

Ive seen the face of darkness,

Ive seen the face of Rage,

Ive seen the face of Demons,

That causes me to Hate,

All these faces that I see,

Are all things inside of me,

The question will I ever succeed?

But know we're all victims,

In this deep dark sea,

Lying up against the other side of this door

I begin to feel abandoned

You seem to be falling away further more

So that my vision of you is nothing but a phantom



Even though you proceed to reach out

With your hand, uncontrolled with desperation

This door is a Barrier that shrieks and shouts

Because your lost with in your denialation



To stop this you must speak

To stop this you must understand

im confused and dont know how to respond

Please break down the door and choke my Hand

Dont leave me to the unknown

Unbearable are the thoughts

That you think that I am blind

Just because my mouth stays closed

Says nothing



But have you ever looked into my eyes

Have you seen the sorrow that swims inside

Behind this smile of denial

If I can cut through this

i cant cut through everything

Im waiting for you



This pressure builds upon a foundation

That only pressure can take away

My tears over all the lies

My blood spilling for Half truths



My brain tells me one thing

But my heart is in denial

i cant bring myself to accuse

what happens if i am wrong?



But have you ever looked into my eyes

Have you seen the sorrow that swims inside

Behind this smile of denial

If I can cut through this

i cant cut through everything

Im waiting for you



I just want the truth

THis heart is drenched in fear

gazing at the wall of isolation that stands near

It divides the river of blood and i

as the secluded sky begins to cry



left alone in these empty spaces again

you've acknowledge the razor that severs my skin

so why let your eyes shift down to the floor?

Do you not lust my crimson blood anymore?



For years and years you had not allowed my soul to rest

with acid on my skin you left your demented crest

Between the feelings of rage and self-hate

My feelings of confusion seized with your rape



For months and months you stalked my every move

In disguises to make it impossible to view you

Every other random day

You wrote me documents to voice what you say



For weeks and weeks i let the flames kiss those pages

And bleed on the ones that asked for Payments

Nights turned to safe as day turned to Hell

I was locked in my room, that turned to my cell



For days and days my swollen eyes cried

I knew that my shredded body could not hide

A phone call from you to claim your theft

Only hopping I would give birth to my death



Then my disfigured hope was saved

For so many years, months, weeks, days

I waited for the ability to dismember you from my life

But it turns out that you're the one afraid of heights



Whatever happened to you my dear?

Were you unable to live with looking in the mirror

All you could see was a fucking lie

So now I laugh at your suicide



You wandered up to the gates of Hell

The treacherous pain I felt you do as you ring that bell

You gouged my sanity from my brain

Burn you bastard and enjoy your fame.

This song i wrote in memory for my friend Skyler W. who was murdered here in my hometown a few years back. It was ruled as a suicide only because they did not have enough evidence to support what really happened. It was easier for the police to rule it as a suicide because Skyler had been admitted on several occasions for treatment for that. Why would they want to justify the life of a non-law biding citizen who was 18? FUCK THE POLICE.



Silence Upon the Tracks



Below the broken street light

The glass still flickers orange

Below the cloudless filled sky

Tears splash upon the wood



cables stringed from side to side

The trees are swaying sound

One bright star into the Sky

The silence is all round



Flickering up and down

Flickering left to right

Flickering up into the midnight

As the train goes passing by

Flickering up and down

Flickering left to right

Flickering up into the midnight

As the train goes passing by



Flesh is sleeping upon the tracks

And the rails are kissed with blood

Your Face an unrecognizable mask

Was this the way it was?



Depression had emerged from your mouth

And the doors behind you slammed

Around the thoughts of termination felt

So falling was your plan



Flickering up and down

Flickering left to right

Flickering up into the midnight

As the train goes passing by



RIP SKYLER I know you didn't jump man. And you know I tried everything I could to get the case re-opened, i had the fucker in my living room and had no idea until he opened his mouth. But you were right police really dont serve anyone any good unless it serves them benefits. Fuck the police until the day I die. I love you man.

These tears of mine...Why do they fall? They mean nothing to me. But i cant seems to delete them from my body.



Why do I cry? Good question.. I was hoping you could tell me. My hostile attitude and all these feelings that rape my mind have consumed me so I no longer can see my options. I feel as if I have given a choice: to fall or to fall... But then why am I falling? Is it because I have chosen to fall? Is this all secretly my fault or is it just another thought I must face every day until I forget? Will I ever forget? Will I ever be forgiven? Or am I just here to take it all? I know I am not the only one because those who read this and understand, understand.



The sun has burned out this abused light bulb. It seems this time it can not be repaired. So what next? Are we forced to seclude ourselves in this freezing nightmare? Condemned to walk through this darkness alone? Or do you have a written document that consists of your reasons and conclusions on why remain unbearably blind?

I am not your pet to be beaten around. If you command me to "speak" I will viciously sever the skin and muscle from your bones. I am not your dream to throw away. I am not your scar to only bleed again. I am not your bitch to be raped. I am not your fucking pet.