myspace blogs04:53 Jan 20 2006
Times Read: 545
just posting some blogs i did on myspace so you can get to know me a little more
Monday, January 16, 2006
my weekend
ok now its time for me to post most of my weekend..i would have done it befor but this is like the only time this whole weekend i've been alone in my house other then family..ok frieday cara stay over and we hung out with peter and cameron at there place..then care stayed the night at my house with other friend who needed a place to stay but i don't want to say there name..then we went back down to cameron and peter's house and hung out..then on the way home (thats like 2 streets)my on friend got spoted and had to leave cuz the didn't want us in truble for anything..so now its just cara,peter and me at my house..i was getting pissed cuz 2 of my friends were making out on MY BED yah..then we went back down to peters house..they made out some more i was still pissed the only reson i went down the is to maybe talk to cameron if he was home but nope i don't have that kind of luck but it was cool i watch the crow..and me and cara came back to my house and my mom toke her home..and now today i hung out with a couple of people at my house the last person left at 10ish
Saturday, January 14, 2006
fuck this
ok i got this thing telling about all shit fathers do and how kids thank them..i say FUCK THAT he naver did shit for me or gave a damn about what i did with my life i could be dead for all he cared..no he would care cuz that means one less kid to pay for so he can fucking die..that will the most happist day in my life is when he dies
blogging
Current mood: blah
Category: Blogging
blah i miss you guys in pittsburgh and ovada alot..i feel like crying right now but i can't i have friends over( i guess i can call them that)..well i felt like cutting last night..i was with friends but i was trying so hard to not cry and i didn't goodie for me i guess well yah..so yah i haven't did that since the last time i talked about it..yah i don't feel like writeing any more right no not b/c they might read it there to bussy making out and shit to know what i'm writing
at home
Current mood: blah
yah i'm at home kinda bord i don't know were i put my drink and its ok i'm not doing to b/c i'm depress ok..yah don't have much to talk about..kelly call me i miss you and daddy..so..i don't know whats going on with allie i wish i know cuz of last time i was down there shit happend..yah..i might just start rambling again so yah..i got nothing later..
Monday, January 09, 2006
in school
Current mood: thirsty
well i'm in school right now just bord..the day so far i found out that one of my friends boyfried died this weekend..he was really sick he didn't have to die it wasn't his falt he was sick he was born with it..all i want to say is may him R.I.P. cuz only the good die young
Sunday, January 08, 2006
idk
Current mood: blank
Category: Blogging
i'm so bord no ones online..i can't find my black lipstick anyways it was almost gone so yah..my day was boring i cleaned my room talked a little online the hole in my ears closed up and i can't find my safty pin to redo them that kinda sucks so yah i'm bord so some one leave me comment or something..but i just found some out some of the bands that are playing wapred this year and there almost all bands i like..if i'm going and i hope i am i might take kelly with me but i don't know and theres someone differnt i want to bring but i don't know if they would want to go..i guess i'll just wait and see were life takes me till then..yah thats all i have later
Saturday, January 07, 2006
life again
Current mood: happy
Category: Life
ok heres whats up..did nothing much today but clean but i had to the landlords coming later today(sunday)..WHOOT i'm dating the coolist guy i know..life is looking better i just need to move down to pittsburgh agian it looks like the only thing stoping me is my mom yah thats odd i know but the place i want to move to that ovada found for me she's not wanting to move there..she should be making a little more money soon and i should be making some to if i get the job witch should happen cuz they can't find any one who wants it..but the down side to that is i'll only be working weekends so i wouldn't be able to come down to pittsburgh as much as i would want damn i would want to leave pittsburgh if i could..so thats life
Friday, January 06, 2006
blogging
Current mood: frustrated
Category: Blogging
so yah i didn't go to school today..i'm trying to talk my mom into the house but i don't think its going to work all becuse that were we moved from..i think i'm the only one who liked living there..so yah she's not even trying to call people and shit that pisses me off she got me all stressed and now she's not doing anything..damn she gets me so mad sometimes..but i guess theres nothing i can do about it..i'm trying to get a job to get the money to move so yah..later
Monday, January 02, 2006
right now
Category: Blogging
right now i feel so stressed..i feel like this is my only chance to move back to pittsburgh and if i fuck this up i don't know what i will do..and i'm thinking about cutting i just don't like this feeling that ever time i'm stressed i want to cut but maybe i'll just get a drink or something oh yah that reall good stop cutting and start drinking well i don't want to go to a shrink to help with depressen like that help wow they put you on some pill to make you feel good like that helps that doesn't deal with the problem i think that killing myself will stop but i just can't i start to think of the people i love that the only think that stops me maybe a couple of pain pills will help i know i should stop this shit..this is how i started 1st i cut then i tryed to OD and when i really tryed hard to die i fucked up my arm and wrist and a hand full of pain pill and now i'm only drinking i don't even know if i should post this..well lets see if i can deal with this we will know after the 2 weeks if i did it or now..i will do this or die trying..yah and no comments about how i shouldn't cut,try to OD or drink i heard it all befor
house hunting
Current mood: awake
Category: Life
my mom gave me about 2 weeks to find a place in pittsburgh to move back so if any one can help me in anyway i don't care if all you can do is give me a good site but it has to have 3 bedrooms and we can keep our cats and small dog
Wednesday, December 28, 2005
pittsburgh
Current mood: hopeful
Category: Life
hey all i'm trying to talk my mom into letting me come down to pittsburgh this weekend she said maybe but you know and kelly trying to talk her dad into letting me stay with them..if i don't have a place to stay i'm fucked cuz then my mom isn't going to let me come down at all
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
Me
Current mood: sad
Category: Blogging
hey all i'm just sad again nothing new i guess..i came from reading someones blog and it made me start thinking about shit i don't want to think about and then all the what ifs of my past like what if i did kill myself,what if i did belive my family about the shit they told me about my mom and shit,what if i had to move in with them or my dad(wich i'm clearly not wanted by) just so many what ifs it gets me thinking and i can't stop damn i hate this feeling i wish i could just stop feeling at times that seems like the only way i'll be able to live..some times i just want to not leave my room at all no eating or drinking and just see how long i can last..(the longist i've been able to go whas 20 hours)..my arm kinda feels funny sometimes now and it makes me hate myself when i look at it but i have no one to blame but my self its my own fucking fult..yah..
Friday, December 23, 2005
life again
Current mood: depressed
i'm really depress right now and i don't want to do that other thing so i'm just going to stay in my room all day and not eat or anything i hope i can get away with it..i know its not going to help anything but i don't care i feel reall depress right now and want to cry so i'm just going to do it
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
just blogging
Current mood: depressed
Category: Blogging
hey all i just feel like blogging i don't know what about i guess i'll just talk about yah life just such an happy topic i was going to stay home today but i just went in late about 11ish if my brother's dad didn't come over today i whould have stayed home i hate him why can't he see my mom doesn't want him back and if she did take him back i don't know what i'll do having him around make me want to you know and i can't cuz of something me and daddy(joe for you people who didn't know)talked about..but anyway i still feel depress and emo alot well not as much but i still want a boyfriend or girlfriend cuz i'm just feeling so damn lonly more and more i know i have my friends up here but there not like you guys in pittsburgh or like a boyfriend or girlfriend..yah..i'm going to wear a skirt and fishnets to school..i'm going to be so fucking cold but i said i would and you guys know if i say i'm going to do it i'm going to do it..DAMN..i'm getting depress again fuck oh yah i stoped saying fuck as much and giving people who look at me the finger i guess thats good..i'm listen to some sum 41 maybe that will put me in a better mood..so yah i guess i'm going to go now
Monday, December 19, 2005
my ear
Current mood: accomplished
Category: Blogging
hey all i just piecred my other ear whoot i have a new pic up to now
???
Current mood: confused
Category: Blogging
the ??? was just b/c i couldn't think of a subject..its cold and i'm at the library i don't feel like walking home but anyways..i kinda like this guy at my school and he told me if i wanted he would do my tattoo for me that he has the tattooing gun and every thing..i'm just so damn shy..i don't think he likes me like that any way..yah..i guess i'm just not ment to have a boyfriend but i guess thats life..i felt emo today what school 3 pd i don't know why but i think it has to do what me and joe talked about last night but i'm not sure..so yah thats life.. i say that alot don't i..so later
Sunday, December 18, 2005
my hair
Current mood: bouncy
Category: Blogging
hey all i just died my hair today its a kinda dark redish color it looks sweet as hell i'll post a pic later
Friday, December 16, 2005
bord with life
Current mood: bored
Category: Blogging
i'm so fucking bord its a friday night and i'm at home alone..damn i need a life and a BF or a GF..well one thing good about tonight i helped my mom piss of my borthers dad cuz she needed to look nice so i helped her out and yes i have long skirts and dress shirts that are nice looking but any way he was yellin "why didn't you wear that kind of stuff when we were togather" that fucking ass dand i can't stand him..yah i'm just bord as fuck plz talk to me some one anyone even if i don't know you
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
lip piercing
Current mood: curious
Category: Life
hey i was thinking about piercing my lip but i don't know if i should do it i'm reading some stuff about it..it seems ok to do it yourself i just want to make sure about if using a earing or a saftey pin is ok
life
Current mood: calm
Category: Blogging
hey all whats up..i don't really know what to write..i did start a journal but i don't really write in it any more i think my mom wanted to get it and read it so yah so this is the safeist place to write what i'm feeling and shit..well i'm working on a new tattoo is on my chest..i want bigger gages but my mom said no and i don't want to piss her off and i want my eyebrow done but i just don't have the money i would do it myself but thats to close to my eye and i don't want to fuck it up but i was thinking about pirceing my lip but i'm not shore how my mom would act when she found out or i could hide it like my friends do but she's smarter then there moms so yah..i havn't really done that other thing eather so yay me i guess but i kinda like the pain yah i'm just now finding how much i like pain its kind odd but yah..so thats my life no hold on theres more KELLY(my sister well not by blood but any way)MOVED thats depressing to me now she's in KO yah nothing more
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