AND ON A TOTALLY UNRELATED TOPIC...
15:00 Feb 23 2006
Times Read: 912
I asked lord.v. (after I'd gotten over my giggle fit) how his cat was doing. Yes he has a cat. Called Babee. awwwww. This was his reply:
babee is doing fine, he is sleeping 13hrs next to the radiator, 7 hrs in bed with me, 3 hrs he is just sitting somewhere with eyes closed and 1 hr he is howling at the door lol
Now you may all go awwww. But try living with a cat doing that. I should know. My cat Megan (named after the woman in the film Dog Soldiers.....I like that film) is a champion "yowler" as I put it. Especially when she's in season 0_o.
I think we should get Babee and Megan together and see what the kittens would turn out like. Evil kitty army of the night most likely.
Yet some more stuff from www.thealchemist/info!!!!14:38 Feb 21 2006
Times Read: 919
These were questions given by grade-schoolers in exams:)
- The future of "I give" is "I take."
- The parts of speech are lungs and air.
- The inhabitants of Moscow are called Mosquitoes.
- A census taker is man who goes from house to house increasing the population.
- Water is composed of two gins. Oxygin and hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water.
- (Define H2O and CO2.) H2O is hot water and CO2 is cold water.
- A virgin forest is a forest where the hand of man has never set foot.
- The general direction of the Alps is straight up.
- A city purifies its water supply by filtering the water then forcing it through an aviator.
- Most of the houses in France are made of plaster of Paris.
- The people who followed the Lord were called the 12 opossums.
- The spinal column is a long bunch of bones. The head sits on the top and you sit on the bottom.
- We do not raise silk worms in the United States, because we get our silk from rayon. He is a larger worm and gives more silk.
- One of the main causes of dust is janitors.
- A scout obeys all to whom obedience is due and respects all duly constipated authorities.
- One by-product of raising cattle is calves.
- To prevent head colds, use an agonizer to spray into the nose until it drips into the throat.
- The four seasons are salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
- The climate is hottest next to the Creator.
- Oliver Cromwell had a large red nose, but under it were deeply religious feelings.
- The word trousers is an uncommon noun because it is singular at the top and plural at the bottom.
- Syntax is all the money collected at the church from sinners.
- The blood circulates through the body by flowing down one leg and up the other.
- In spring, the salmon swim upstream to spoon.
- Iron was discovered because someone smelt it.
- In the middle of the 18th century, all the morons moved to Utah.
- A person should take a bath once in the summer, not so often in the winter.
from www.thealchemist/info
14:17 Feb 21 2006
Times Read: 922
BEFORE YOU READ THIS!!!! Have some tissues handy, coz you'll be laughing that much you'll have tears in your eyes:)
1. Ancient Egypt was inhabited by mummies and they all wrote in hydraulics. They lived in the Sarah Dessert. The climate of the Sarah is such that all the inhabitants have to live elsewhere.
2. Moses led the Hebrew slaves to the Red Sea where they made unleavened bread, which is bread made without any ingredients. Moses went upon Mount Cyanide to get the ten Commandments. He died before he ever reached Canada.
3. Solomon had three hundred wives and seven hundred porcupines.
4. The Greeks were a highly sculptured people, and without them we wouldn't have history. The Greeks also had myths. A myth is a female moth.
5. Socrates was a famous Greek teacher who went around giving people advice. They killed him. Socrates died from an overdose of wedlock. After his death, his career suffered a dramatic decline.
6. In the Olympic games, Greeks ran races, jumped, hurled biscuits, and threw the java.
7. Julius Caesar extinguished himself on the battlefields of Gaul. The Ides of March murdered him because they thought he was going to be made king. Dying, he gasped out, "Tee hee, Brutus."
8. Joan of Arc was burnt to a steak and was canonized by Bernard Shaw.
9. Queen Elizabeth was the "Virgin Queen." As a queen she was a success. When she exposed herself before her troops they all shouted "hurrah."
10. It was an age of great inventions and discoveries. Gutenberg invented removable type and the Bible. Another important invention was the circulation of blood. Sir Walter Raleigh is a historical figure because he invented cigarettes and started smoking.
11. Sir Francis Drake circumcised the world with a 100-foot clipper.
12. The greatest writer of the Renaissance was William Shakespeare. He was born in the year 1564, supposedly on his birthday. He never made much money and is famous only because of his plays. He wrote tragedies, comedies, and hysterectomies, all in Islamic pentameter. Romeo and Juliet are an example of a heroic couple. Romeo's last wish was to be laid by Juliet.
13. Writing at the same time as Shakespeare was Miguel Cervantes. He wrote Donkey Hote. The next great author was John Milton. Milton wrote Paradise Lost. Then his wife died and he wrote Paradise Regained.
14. Delegates from the original 13 states formed the Contented Congress. Thomas Jefferson, a Virgin, and Benjamin Franklin were two singers of the Declaration of Independence. Franklin discovered electricity by rubbing two cats backward and declared, "A horse divided against itself cannot stand." Franklin died in 1790 and is still dead.
15. Abraham Lincoln became America's greatest Precedent. Lincoln's mother died in infancy, and he was born in a log cabin which he built with his own hands. Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves by signing the Emasculation Proclamation. On the night of April 14, 1865, Lincoln went to the theatre and got shot in his seat by one of the actors in a moving picture show. They believe the assinator was John Wilkes Booth, a supposingly insane actor. This ruined Booth's career.
16. Johann Bach wrote a great many musical compositions and had a large number of children. In between he practiced on an old spinster which he kept up in his attic. Bach died from 1750 to the present. Bach was the most famous composer in the world and so was Handel. Handel was half German, half Italian, and half English. He was very large.
17. Beethoven wrote music even though he was deaf. He was so deaf he wrote loud music. He took long walks in the forest even when everyone was calling for him. Beethoven expired in 1827 and later died for this.
18. The nineteenth century was a time of a great many thoughts and inventions. People stopped reproducing by hand and started reproducing by machine. The invention of the steam boat caused a network of rivers to spring up. Cyrus McCormick invented the McCormick raper, which did the work of a hundred men. Louis Pasteur discovered a cure for rabbits. Charles Darwin was a naturalist who wrote the Organ of the Species. Madman Curie discovered radio. Karl Marx became one of the Marx Brothers.
blonde moments
16:35 Feb 19 2006
Times Read: 931
This was a convo between me and lordvampirio. I guess I just asked for it didn't I?
On Feb 19 2006 lordvampirio wrote:
something funny
On 16:28:33 Feb 19 2006 crowgirl wrote:
say something funny.
Yup, I did.
He then wrote:
you wanted me to say something funny and i did exactly that lol
cheeky bugger lol. can't get mad at the linkmaster tho' ;)
sunday morning
16:26 Feb 19 2006
Times Read: 932
Ok. Woke up about six-thirty. Spent half an hour arguing with myself about wether to go pee pee or stay in my cozy, snuggly bed. Eventually got up because my bladder was gonna burst. ( I blame the beer I'd drank). Walked side ways into the wall and bonked my head. Owch. Then I decided to go back to sleep. Tripped over a cable on my floor and fell head long into my bed. Owch again.
Got woken up by my dog deciding to give me a dog-spit facial. *urgh*.
The only words I could say at seven a.m. was "coffee" and "more coffee".
Went to see my cousin. She's gonna have the baby on Friday. Wondering if that'll be an excuse to miss school. bwahahaha.
Visited my gran. Was officially insane after five minutes of being there.
Am now deliberating on what movie to watch. I should be ok with Night of the Living Dead. It's still light outside lol.
Have no idea of what else to put in here.
just for lord vampirio ;)
18:39 Feb 18 2006
Times Read: 936
well, seeing as he said my last entry (which I deleted) wasn't long enough, here's a new one.
My cousin Laura is due to give birth to a baby girl very soon. She's going to be called Lila May. I went to see her on Wednesday. We'd been chatting for a few minutes, when she told me I might have to go to the hospital with her because she's been in slow labour since last saturday! needless to say I nearly had a heart attack! but now, I'm just waiting for that call to come so I can welcome my new cousin into the world!
And my Uncle Rob has been promoted to Manger for Leicester City football club. This is so amazing! he's famous! argh! lol. We're all so proud of him, and glad he's doing amazingly well. Leicester haven't lost a game with him yet!
What else? I've missed you all like crazy this past week. Due to the fact I live with my mum in the week, and my pc there has fucked up majorly. I couldn't get online. Message me with all the latest news please!
I didn't get any valentine's cards. biiiiig suprise lol. -_-. however, my mum did! eh?????? 0_o lol. well, I may add more to this later, but for now see ya!
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