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This is my way of misquoting a line from As Good As It Gets. You may remember it was a movie starring Jack Nicholson and Helen Hunt. I have had one crazy 24 hours that is for sure.



My bipolar behind ran out of medication and could not sleep a wink last night. Thank God for the Rave. I would have driven my roommate bonkers. I know she has a hard time sleeping with the medication she is on. She suffers from insomina without the medicine, so she did not need me going all manic and keeping her up. As it is , I was up until around eleven. I finally got my meds, and went to bed. I slept like a baby. The phone rang when my friend Jenniffer called. She had a baby boy on August 9th. She needed to bum some cigarettes from me until she gets paid tomorrow. I did not mind, since she helped me out not too long ago. I took a cab over to her house, since I do not drive. I did not want to go anywhere, but I did not have any major incidents with anyone. I had to stop by an atm and then buy the cigarettes. I was going to go grocery shopping, but since I can get hostile in public , when I am not full of medicine, I rule out the grocery store until tomorrow. The cab driver was nice. He was a Vietnam veteran who made me feel that somehow the guys who went to Vietnam were not fully appreciated for their efforts for this country. I am not a warmonger and I do not always suport the policies of our leaders that lead us into war. I do support the men and women in uniform. I wore the uniform of the navy for two years. Do not ask how a nutcase like myself got into the navy.



My next door neighbor had her baby yesterday, the one year anniversary of Hurricane Katrina. Her name is Ariana Paige. The mother and baby are doing fine. They are both home. The delivery went off without any complications. I wish them the best. You may remember from one of my last entries that I am concerned about the mother. She is an attention seeker. When I went over to see the baby, she was walking around talking about how much pain she was in. I do not doubt it. She needed to lay down and I told her so. Her fiancee and her mother in law were trying to fix the baby bed for the infant. The mother did not seem concerned about the baby at all. I hope she does not have the baby blues or post partum depression.



I had chinese food for dinner. I ordered steam dumplings and a tasty dish called mixed meats with mushrooms. I love mushrooms. The dish had shrimp, chicken, pork and beef. It was in a brown sauce. I could not eat it all. I have been listening to Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. I love that movie. I saw it on opening night at the movies. I get a kick out of Alan Rickman as Serevus Snape.

I will not relate the incident that made me write this entry, since I am not your basic gossipmonger and I was not directly involved. Please remember that behind every user name is a person. That person has feelings and they can be hurt. True enough, some people are easier hurt than others. It is not right to intrude on another's conversation with someone else. It is also not right to start trouble with someone just because someone on your friend's list does not care for them. This is so childish that I cannot imagine anyone over the age of 13 doing this, but it happens. My son is eleven and too young for a rave account, but he knows that momma would get him good for behaving in that manner.



Some people kid and play on this site with some people. That is fine if that is already established between the two involved. If you do not want to be considered mean and inconsiderate, then do unto others as you would have done to yourself. If not, expect some backlash. Just because you know the people on the Rave just on the Internet, it does not make them less human.

It is hot in Texas. I just stepped outside for a cigarette and I am beginning to think I need to move to a cooler climate. Alaska, perhaps. Maybe even the Northeastern part of the United States. I am thankful I have central air and have so far been able to afford my light bill this summer. Two of the main providers of electricity in Texas, TXU and Reliant , have been cutting off people's lights right and left. You would think that since the temperature is so high and the heat index off the frigging charts that somehow that would be illegal. No , apparently is is not. I have Reliant. TXU is more expensive and I would have already went a few rounds with them by now.



I have work tonight. We used 13 temps last night and the numbers for the temps are the same tonight. Gloria the temp supervisor wants the same

people there tonight that came in last night. I am on the list. I need the money, but have debated about calling in. I am not going to though. My light bill has to be paid.



The girl next door is expecting a baby anyday now. She is not the brightest bulb in the marquee by any means and I am worried she will nto know what to do with an infant. Maybe natural mother instincts will come into play. She does have a mother, mother-in -law and sister living nearby. So far, the mother-in-law seems like the only help to her. Her sister has two children, but she is so caught up in her own drama, I doubt if she will be any help. The mother is just as bad. Sometimes family is little or no help.



I wish it was winter. With snow on the ground and even more on its way. That would make this girl one happy camper. Of course, central Texas barely gets snow. It is like expecting Pat Robertson, the TV preacher, to be nice to people of other religions besides the one he is a member of at the moment.

I took a quiz and found out that Salvador Dali is the artist that should paint me. Since he is one of my favorite artists, I liked the outcome. I was thinking I would get Leonardo Da Vinci. I like him too. Apparently, I am not Mona Lisa material. Oh well.



I got asked if I am sure I am a woman by someone that rated my profile. My roommate said I should have told them to ask my child. I would not do that, but I was taken aback at first. The person who asked that was not trying to be offensive.



As luck would have it, some dear friends of mine are having money problems. I wish I was rich or would win the lottery. That would stop the money troubles. Money may be the root of all evil, but it is needed to survive in this world.



I am in need of a nap. May have to take one soon. I slept a little last night, but someone kept calling and hanging up again. Finally, my roommate answered and mentioned prosecution to the offender. I imagine finding out that they might be in legal trouble over their little phone calls made them decide to quit calling.

I am taking Wednesday night off. I need it and am looking forward to some time off. I will be going to the movies and perhaps out to eat. My roommate, Lori, and I were going to see World Trade Center, but I think she rather see something else now. She thinks that Oliver Stone, the director, took too many liberties with the storyline. I think we are going to see Running With Scissors if it is playing. I think it is.



Then I will work Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday night. Four twelve hour shifts. I am not complaining, I need the money and am thankful to have a job. Thursday I may take my son to Peter Piper Pizza. He wants to play games. I am sure he will have a good time. I hope I do. He can wear me out. I love him with all my heart, but keeping up with him gets harder as I get older.



I have been reading a book about Colin Powell. He is an interesting guy. He was not the best student in school. His sister, Marilyn , was the scholar in the family. Both of his parents came to the United States from Jamacia.



Not much to say now. Good night and Good luck.

Sometines things work out for the best. My friend Chris was married to this one lady for a few years. He met his step brother's girffriend, Jenniffer. Jenniffer ended up marrying the step brother. Neither marriage worked out. That is sad, especially since Chris had two children by his first wife. I will say that Chris is not a deadbeat father and has always supported his children by the first marriage. Jenniffer has always been a major part of those children's lives.



Chris fell in love with Jenniffer from the first time he met her. That had to be hard. Falling for someone who is married to a family member, when you are already married is not the best stituation in the world. I saw with my own two eyes how much he loved her. Whenever Jenniffer needed a place to stay or any kind of help, Chris was there to help her. I thought it would take another ten years from now for Jenniffer to see just who the man for her was. Thank all of the universe that I was wrong. They got married in July.



Today I got the phone call that Jenniffer and Chris welcomed their son, Hunter Wayne into the world. I am so happy for them. The fact that he is healthy is a blessing in itself. The fact that his parents realized that they loved each other and needed each other is also a blessing. Like I said at the beginning sometimes things work out for the best. To quote Green Day, it is something unpredictable but in the end its right.

Today has been a pretty good day. I am bipolar and do not have any medication. I have tried not to get all manic, because that drives those around me crazy. I know it worries the shit out of them. I cannot blame them. It scares the hell out of me too. I was never going to put on the Rave that I am bipolar, but I read the journal of a brave soul (I will not name them. I have respect for this individual and you will just have to stumble upon them on your own. When you do, you will find a rare gem. ) and decided if they can be honest about being bipolar then I can too.



I should have my medication soon. I hope so. Going to work without it is like playing Russian Roulette. Some of my coworkers are less than likeable. I am not trying to tell one of them to go to hell or worse. And I do not want to become so angry that I do something I will regret.



Last night or early this morning, I came upon a profile that was made to flame another person. I was shocked. Someone is pretty angry. I did not know what to think. I have no idea what they were angry about, but I can understand anger like that. I do anything I can to keep from flaming another Rave member. I do not think that is needed on this wonderful site. I hope the people involved can work out their disagreements. If they can never be friends, maybe they can agree to leave each other alone. Sometimes that is the best option.



I do not claim to be the most level headed person or most perfect person on the Rave. Just ask Mikhail. He can tell you that I have many faults and can be anything but level headed at times. I can get angry at others and show my monkey behind. I am trying to change certain behaviors of mine, so my son does not have to pay a price for my misbehaviors. Plus, I do not want him to learn these behaviors from me. He may be bipolar. He is too young for that to be determined. I just hope that if he is the treatment for it will vastly improve before he needs it.

Apparently, there are many rumors and much gossip flying around on the Rave. Some may believe every little dirty detail about another they hear. That is not intelligent or mature. It is dumb and immature to spread rumors about people you only know on the Internet. It is dumb and immature to believe the crap as well. This is suppose to be a fun place and for the most part it is. I only wish everyone would act their age not their shoe size.

I have been reading some journal entries of late that have led me to believe we have some highly immature people on the Rave. I do not care how long you have been on, it is bad form to downrate someone just because they gave you a low score. If the opinion of someone on the Internet bothers you that much, maybe you do not need a Vampire Rave account. Or a premium membership. I got a premium membership yesterday and noticed that someone I rated an eight, gave me a one. Ok? So what. That was their personal opinion of my profile. There are those who were whelps that I gave a ten to and they rated me lower. I gave them a ten to help them out. I have no intention of downrating them now.



I have also seen some feuds going on that have caused some to delete their account. I will hope that in the future everyone will stay out of those petty disagreements that cause problems. Just ignore silly people. They cannot hurt you if you pay them no attention.