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OK, It's "oh-Stupid-thirty" in the morning, and after being so frustrated with the India team, and having a couple of beers to wind down... This here could provide *HOURS* of entertainment.



Thank you, YAGATHAI!

The Purpose of the Pookah



OK, I really don't know where to begin, so lets start with my motivation. Like I said. Instinct, mostly. I've been playing with energy, and even learned on my own that I can help people by pulling headaches/backaches out and such. I've also been helping people (counseling people) ever since I can remember. Picture an 8 year old girl talking to her friends' mother about her ex who shot himself. Its what I do; its what I've always done.



My b/f and friends find it fascinating that I knock out parking lights and drain batteries. I don't intend to do so, it just happens. I came here to VR after seeing a program on PSY vampirism, and thought I might be an unknowing psyvamp, but after doing more reading, I realized that's not me at all.



I'm a nature girl, the very thought of taking in other people's energy actually icks me out. I don't want any part of their judgements, pain, angush, fear, pettiness, etc. What I have learned to do instinctively is Scoop the pain out of them, and send it on its way into the universe - where I believe the universe will find it, fix it and send it back whole and complete to be re-used. (again no one taught me this, it is just instinct.)



Then I heard from an irish/native american shaman I should be sending it to the ground and that doesn't make sense to me either. I still throw it up, not down.



It made sense to me when I was reading about reiki coming in from above through the head (third eye) hand and heart chakras, from a universal power. It can never be depleted. That part I liked. Sometimes I would have to "replace" the bad stuff I scooped out of people, and it would be difficult for me to find the right color to replace it with. Now that I can envision a universal white life source, now that I know that its there, it helps a lot.



I have always been able to do this energy work with my third eye, and a bit of my hand. My heart chakra, and anything below it however, I could only describe them as "frozen" I was only able to feel them once when I did something (again instinct) that I named "Bridging my LAN connections" I connected all of my chakras in a line down my body, built a bridge and as the energy flowed through all of them, they opened wider and surged for a bit.



For about two hours after that little experiement, I felt like I needed to drink LOTS of water, and I felt really... well, surged!



I have not been able to succesfullly "meditate" in the way that others describe, I have only been able to play with energy, send it away, mix it around, etc. I have tried to meditate, but I never get to the void. I am still working on calming my thoughts. Another friend suggested a single phrase to let the thought go, and I am working on that.



I also have a strong connection with Native American spirituality, I can't read a single thing without feeling like I already know it. I suppose that part of what I know might be called "shamanism" once I figure out how to find a source to "re-learn" it.



The odd thing is, I feel charged with weather, someone once told me I am an "elemental" and I have on more than one occasion (more than enough to be simple coincidence) "held off the rain." for up to 3/4 of a day.



Now, if you know anything about me, I am an empath. I am an advocate. I have a strong sense of helping and healing. I help anyone that passes my way with a question, and I neither expect nor want anything in return. Now, in the Reiki book it almost demands that you charge something so that the energy doesn't get fouled up with the guilt of the person not giving back. I can see it, but it still sounds too coincidentally greedy to me.



I have spent hours talking to homeless people, and I actually was homeless myself once. My goals in life are to make great changes in myself, my community, and to catalyze positive changes in anyone that comes into contact with me. One of my first endeavors is to add my help number appendix to my book, "Picking up the pieces" (link on profile) and get it published. Then I suppose I might end up in local government and community service making all kinds of changes for the better.



I'm not sure if Reiki is my first step, but I know I'd better get some formal training on this stuff... I feel I'm getting too advanced to just keep playing around blindly and without guidance.





(I wrote this in a PM and thought it was important enough to my growth to copy down.)