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Here i am another day same pain different day.

unfortunatly i dont think it will subside

why do i believe so?

because the one who can soothe it

wont....

why?

i dont know i suppose it really just dosnt matter

maybe there feelings are just that much more important than mine

so wtf is the point?

truly i am begining to hate myself

i bite my tongue and try to stay shut but on the inside.....well on the inside everything is different

alone.... everything is shattered



idk wtf to do

dont know what to say

dont know how i can even try to fix it

because its not only me...

Reaching, stretching

trying so hard

fighting endlessly

for his eternal love

speaking, yelling

fighting, loving

hopeless atempts

taken by the winds blowing

broken words

fallen tears

dieing soul

realized fears

replacement comes

useful no more

time for next

walk out the door

step another

heart a haze

life no more

the end of days

One last breath

i breath to thee

My Love was True

always was will always be













*I change my wish, i wish i could be all you needed. That your love for me was as strong as mine for you.*

There is no hope

no hope when the one who can help you

does only the opposite

when the life your living is full of sadness and despare

Reaching out is slowly becoming obsolete

what point is there searching for love

when no matter how hard you try it is never enough

you try everyday to please him

carve a smile upon his face which fills you with joy

to sooth the pain others have caused within him

but i am not enough

the love i can give is never enough

what purpose do i have to stay?

why would i stay where i am constantly rejected

why would i stay when the reason im here isnt happy

im trying desperatly to keep the smile on his face

to build this family

but there is no point

i pray every night that i could be what he needs

but i know in my heart it will never be

and it kills me

kills to know the one i love will never feel for me as i do for him

i guess its time for me to take my leave

to set my beautiful love free to find his happiness



Now i think on my daughter who has grown to love him

who calls for him and grows a smile when she hears or see's him

my unborn

the child growing steadily in my womb

what am i to do?

i love my children more than life itself

but how will i look upon this child without my heart breaking

Goddess please aid me threw this pain

Guide this lowly girl away from the hurt

i beg of you

please.......please.......

COMMENTS

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nightwalkerbloodlust
00:07 Dec 15 2011

Omg bby im crying jus reading this so sad bby if u need to talk im here always now forever u make me happy since i firsted started talkin to you

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POST COMMENT

Earlier today i was asked what i would wish for had i 1 wish.





i would wish to never experiance love. to love only my friends and family but to never fall in love. Never having to experiance the pain of heartache,deception,betrayl. yes i would loose the good of the first kiss, the affection and such but..... sometimes the pain is too great. sometimes you are hurt and the other person is too blind to see there actions for what they are. sometimes they dont even care. whats the point? i would just remove that possibility and enjoy what i have, i would never long for love because i wouldnt know what it was.



sigh

Love molds and destroys a person many times over. the purpose to find the one who will mold you correctly and hurt you less.