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I have found someone to start a relationship with that is at least worth my time and energy. I don't want to be too optimistic, afraid that this chance might hurt me. Yet I am not taking for granted what I have been given now. I am hopeful that this is the last time I'll have to start over again. I am hoping that he can be the one to cure all my ills, that it to be seen though.



I am optimistic in the fact that we have a very strong connection and for once I feel like we can actually make it. My friend's are hopeful for me, and I am very protective of this fragile bond. I don't want any replays of the last couple of relationships. What's odd is that Arthur seems strangely receptive to me. I guess he feels bad for how things went, but I am not caring.



I had a dream were Travis told me he missed me, and his girlfriend begged me for forgiveness. This is strange, since I wasn't really thinking of him or his girlfriend when I went to sleep. I am hopeful that neither walk back into my life if I can help it. I don't need to feel like a broken person anymore.



I have worked hard for my peace of mind and am quick to defend what I have gained. I am careful with whom I speak too, and careful with whom I allow close to me. I don't want anyone trying to steal this from me.

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Angelus
14:48 Mar 01 2010

.. you are worthy. just be pleased with yoy first tho.

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This heals all wounds or makes it easier to cope with the intial break. I guess I get tired and realize that it isn't worth to put so much thought into something. I am happy with out thought, but happy with thought when it doesn't choose to burn me. I am finding that in this time I am healing much faster than intended. Pretty soon, I won't have much of any thing else but health and stability.

I have simply decided that life outside of a relationship is pretty nice. I can go on dates with other guys and not be tied down. I can hang out with anyone I please without feeling guilty and most of all I don't have the drama or BS. I have let go the notion that there is going to be anyone right now that is going to be my one. I just want to find whom I am, and right now I have goals to meet. If I find someone on the way, then great but it comes on my terms not theirs.



Although I have met someone that is rather interesting. My goal is to court for six months and see where it goes from there. I don't want to move too fast, but I want it to be steady. :)

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samanthasprettycorpse
04:28 Feb 01 2010

I am in a similar situation. Trying to work on myself, have some responsible fun. I don't think I can take the hurt of another broken heart. Good luck to both of us.

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