Today Marks another year of life. I turned 32 today. I wish I could transpose those numbers so I could be 23. Just renewed my Drivers licesence today It was issued to me a very long time ago. It was the minnesota classic look. Now I too will have a licesence of the current times. That will be most fancy indeed.
Today, 4 people actually wished me happy birthday with out me reminding them. I can't honestly say I would remember most peoples birthday's but I try to do my best if they are posted somewhere to recall when they are.
A card from countess that I have not received yet but felt it should be included.
A birthday lunch wit my mom and sister.
A full new wardrobe
COD 4 (call of duty 4)
The most presious of the gifts I got where the pictures with frames of Kaoru, and Kaoru and Mieta that now sit at my desk at work.
Special thanks to all those that wished me a happy birthday in my birthday thread.
You may have noticed my coven members have been spread out all over the rave. That my coven is still open. I'm Starting it over a fresh start. Til I start recuiting people that i feel display the meaning of my coven Do not ask to be in it. IT's goign to take some time for me to redo my coven.
To my daily journal readers I apologize if the following may be a redundant journal entry. I just really need to get the following out of my head. I'm not looking for sympathy here so please don't.
I don't recall the day this even in my life happened. If I recall the even took place about 22 years ago some time doing my 7th year of life. So yeah basically it happened when I was 7 years old.
I had an adult friend (to protect the memory lets call him Rich this is out of respect of his family that may some day eventually stumble on my journal. Though the odds of that are extremely slim)
So Rich and I became fast friends. He was one of the only people that I could really talk to and be myself around. I remember laughing and listening to rather unusual 80's music and TV themes when around him.
One of the fondest memories was I was in their swimming pool and he pointed it out to me. It was really cool.
Those of you old enough to remember the TV series The Greatest American Hero, will recall the song that played on it. To this day I can't hear the song without tears coming to my eyes.
I knew the man for most of my life. He was the first real friend I ever had. Sadly he passed away on the 7th year of my life. All because of a farming incident. I won't go into details.
My mom was the one to get the phone call. She had to tell me. I was far too young and didn't know how to let it really go. My mom told me that it was ok to cry because it was sad. So I did. I really didn't understand death as it was something new to me.
Age 7 and going to your first funeral. I walked by the casket and it was an open casket. I suppose children should never be allowed to do that. But that was when it hit me. That he wasn't going to come back. I cried again.
I don't recall or not if my mom took me from where I was crying in front of the casket or not. I suppose she did. I feel that she did. Perhaps I should ask her. I suppose I will someday.
I'm still not sure what happened to me that day. It was a day I personally changed. Perhaps even led to the person I am now.
As you may of noticed I don't smile that much. Though there are some people that would disagree with that. That's fine by me. My state of mind is chaotic full of solid down time where I don't smile I just have the etched in stone face look.
I'll share more with you readers as soon as I'm able to. I hope you understand that some things are and how I deal with it.
I really need to let this go. I just don't know how.
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