Flirting: Score 1 for me! Score 0 for the awkward shy part of me! I asked him for his phone number and he gave it to me! And he winked! So I guess now I have to call or text him, since I'm the one that asked in the first place? Oh, boy. There is a language barrier, so perhaps texting is best. I don't know! I'm freaking out!
Forgetting. Doing illogical crap. That's all me. I am going to be so embarrassed when I correct my mistake tomorrow.
Update: No embarrassment necessary! Everything worked out!
I just want to feel a connection to something or someone- anything really. I feel like I'm on autopilot, going through the motions of life. Insert hobby here. Small talk here. School assignment here. Fake smile here. I am an expert at pretending to be happy; I wait all day to spill my emotions, occasionally cry, or to rant on here or in my physical journal.
I feel incredibly guilty for feeling any misery, because it is all my fault. And I should change my situation- do better, be better, feel better. I can just choose to feel better. The pain will go away if I wish it all away. I have food, water, shelter; there is no agony.
I feel like a dumpster for all of your emotions and problems. You didn't even ask how my day was.