The thing about arbitrary numbers here (rating scores, friends lists, honor) is that they're meaningless in reality. Once you log off they have no intrinsic value, they do not impact your life in any way. But, the sad thing is, is that you hold far too much value in this make believe number system.
Too many do.
Absolutely. They wouldn't be able to handle all the 1s I get simply for holding people to VR ToS. It changes *nothing* for me to get 1s or have Honor removed. Numbers are all subjective- and if you hate a person doing it... who cares knowing they don't like you? They are insignificant, right?
I actually get people coming to me complaining and wanting administrative action taken against member's for taking Honor or rating 1s... options Cancer freely gives, and THEY USE THEMSELVES.
They want to shell it out but it should be against the rules if someone else does it.
All these people talk a tough game- act like they are tough crap and others can take them as they or screw off... yet they sure are pansies if someone tries to mess with their "number".
"take them as they *are* or screw off...."
The little things that make me smile. Like, a text message saying that someone misses me. It's nice to know someone is thinking of me when I'm not around, enough to actually miss my presence.
I watched the film, Arrival tonight. It was good. I mean, really, really good. Amy Adams was magnificent and the story was just fantastic. It was all wonderfully done. I love science fiction and I love learning about languages. And, it mixed both those loves into one awesome film. I'm going to have to read the short story it was adapted from at some point. But, I highly recommend it.
I really want to talk about it, but I don't want to give anything away for anyone who hasn't seen it. Like, I really want to talk about it.
im leaving this website ....... :/ i hate being suspended ....
Nyx is having her first vet visit today. Well, first with me. She was supposed to go yesterday, but that little bugger is the master when it comes to hiding. I practically tore the house apart looking for her, and then around 7, when I had given up, she comes waltzing out of wherever she was hiding looking for her dinner. This time I made sure she had nowhere to run off to.
She's gotten much more acomidated to living here, though, which is great. She doesn't hide as often, and she runs around and plays. She'll come up to me without me having to call her over. She's such a freaking cutie. And today she's been super vocal, which is new.
"We are a house of learning and to help you get on your feet and learn how this site works and make new friends and also gain points and see how active you are going to be once you hit a certain level you will be looked over by covens and they will snatch you up."
You know what's awesome? Seeing the same stupid journal entry pop up multiple times on the Journals page under alternate accounts. We get it, someone blocked you, big fucking deal. You don't have to post that same stupid entry fifty times to get your stupid point across.
Waaah! I was blocked, no one loves me! ...Yeesh.
Typically when people make that type of entry, they do it while claiming they don't care, that they're completely unbothered...but if, as you say, they've posted the entry multiple times from multiple profiles, then yeah...they care...because that's effort that goes beyond writing a journal entry and clicking post.
It was posted six times...?!
SMH Some people just don't have a life....don't they know that being blocked is nothing...this is just a website...
The desire to create a new Coven is pretty strong with me at the moment. I want to just create something. But then I remember that I no longer have access to Photoshop, and I no longer have the time for image searching and manipulating. So, while the desire is there, the actual means to make it happen, not so much. I probably could go to Nevermind, see if he'd create something awesome for me (have you seen Cognitive Fabrication's new Crest?! That shit is gorgeous!), but he's got his own life and things to keep him busy. So, I don't. Plus, I actually really enjoy just being in Eternal. It feels like home to me. So, I don't want to pull either of my Sires out of there. It's one of those things where I want to do something but I know I won't, for whatever reason. In the end, I just keep reminding myself that I've run more Covens than one person should be allowed to open and run, and if I did open another it would probably go the same way as the previous thirteen, or was it fourteen? I don't know. I've had a lot of them over the years.
Would someone who knows Disney Songs fairly well be willing to help me with something? Won't take but a moment.
He would take away my Haven. Bah.
Work with the kitten is slow going. I understand that it's all new and different from the shelter, but even so, she should be coming around by now. Instead, she likes hide under one of the couches and the dining room table. I'm able to bring her out from under both by grabbing her by the scruff on the neck, like a mother would, and for a few moments she's okay in my arms. Then she hears a sound or I move too quickly and she bolts right back into her hiding spots. Namely the couch, where it's harder to get to her. I do think she's getting used to me, though, albeit, slowly. She starts purring and kneading at the carpet when she sees me. And when I stick my arm out and touch her, she will rub against me. I don't know, maybe I should have gotten a younger kitten, something that I could raise knowing me. With Nyx, even though she is only seven months or so, she's pretty set in her ways. I'm hoping she comes around soon. I don't want to send her back to that shelter, but I can't spend months and months with a cat who is too timid to be out of hiding when people are home.
some kitties are timid by nature..I think she will get use to you. My daughters grandparents have a cat that comes out for them but in hisses and swats at anybody else. Every once in awhile she will let me pet her for a minute then all of a sudden when you're not expecting it she starts hissing and goes after you...lol
It's been an eventful day. I went with my mother to help plan Liz's baby shower. The way my mom had described the meeting last week, I had expected something extravagant and over-the-top, but it really isn't like that at all. The colors are teal and silver, and the theme is stars and moon. It's all really cute. I especially love the color pallet we're going with. I've got some homework to do, choosing some of the party games, creating a "daddy emergency diaper kit", kind of a gag gift for Kevin, filled with some useful stuff and some silly stuff like tongs, ear and nose plugs, goggles, heavy duty rubber gloves and such. So, that will be fun to throw together.
I also decided on a name for the new kitten. I'm going to call her Nyx, because I love me my mythology. Nyx, goddess of the night, who was said to be so beautiful and have such power that even Zeus feared to anger her. And, the kitten is beautiful, I cannot deny that. She's getting a little more used to things. She mostly likes hiding under the dining room table, but she ventures out a little. She's a little neurotic, she won't sit still when being petted and she nips my fingers as she kneads the carpet. I don't think being in the shelter for the five months she was did her any favors. But, she's home now, and I aim to show her that she's loved and will be cared for. Aphrodite still hasn't made up her mind about her, but Mongo doesn't mind her one bit. He doesn't even acknowledge her most of the time, so that's good. I can't wait until she feels comfortable enough to start venturing into my room, sleeping on my bed.
Wednesday I'm going to go to an engraving place and get a new name plaque for Ishtar. I really hate that they spelled her name wrong on everything. I got a card in the mail yesterday from the vet offering their condolences and giving me a copy of The Rainbow Bridge, and they spelled it Ishatar on both the card and the back of the poem. But, I suppose it doesn't matter. Her name will be fixed and that will be that.
It really makes me cringe when viewing profiles and people have added an apostrophe to a word that shouldn't have an apostrophe, or no apostrophe where there should be one. Pet peeves, man. Grammar and spelling is a lost art.
Haha oh if you come and see my profile you'd probably get sick 😂 my English is "perfect " 😀
But hey I'm Serbian so I am allowed to make grammar mistakeZ 😀
Awwwww but people like to just smash their heads on their keyboards and pretend they know what words mean. ;)
Here you go: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Gv0H-vPoDc
Honestly, I didn't intend to get a new cat this soon. It's only been a week. But, Aphrodite hasn't been taking the loss of Ishtar well, so I wanted to get her a new companion. I was actually going for a kitten, but I walked into the shelter, saw this beauty, and fell in love. The way the girl was describing her reminded me a lot of Ish. She's timid, shy with new people, but when she's comfortable she's affectionate and likes to cuddle. So, I brought her home. Aphrodite and Mongo seem indifferent to her, I honestly expected the worst, but I'm glad neither of them seem to be bothered by her presence. It'll take her a while to get used to being here, to get used to them, but I'm hoping that once she does, she fits in well. I'm thinking her name should be Selene, or maybe Nyx. I haven't really decided yet.
I was able to bring Ishtar home today. They spelled her name wrong on the plaque, so I'm going to have to get a new one, but they did give me an imprint of her paw print and a seed to plant in her memory. I hate to think that my little princess, all that's left of her, is in this tiny wooden box. She's going to rest on my bookshelf, that way she's close to me when I'm gaming or whatever, like she used to be when she was here.
This song has been stuck in my head the last few days. Well, this and MBLAQ's Smoky Girl.
I just have to say, I am so grateful for some of the people I've met over Xbox. Mario and Sam being pretty key in that. Those two keep me sane when I really need people to talk to. And Sam's married, and Mario is... I don't even know right now, but the fact that they are just there to talk to me without all the bullshit of flirting and being stupid, as most guys tend to be when they come into contact with a female gamer, is just what I need. And, they are a little older than me, so it's good to have that real world experience when talking. They know what's what. I just really need that sometimes. That kind of real honesty that isn't clouded by anything, that isn't motivated by anything aside from my wellbeing. I'm grateful for them. So very grateful.
I was thinking about creating another Coven and using the cat as a representation. Then I realized the cat was already taken and I don't really have the drive at present to undertake that endeavor. I wanted to use an image of my Ish. Oh well. Knowing me it probably wouldn't have lasted long anyway.
I've gotten my hands on Battlefield 1 and holy cow, is it a beautiful game. The graphics are outstanding for an FPS. I haven't really played much of it yet, worked my way through the intro and little more, but I think I'm going to enjoy it. And, after playing Destiny and Halo for some years now, I'm pretty good with the weapons, I think. So, yeah, that will definitely be one I'm eager to jump into and really play. See how I do in multi-player and through the campaign. I've gotten pretty good in Destiny's Crucible, so we'll see how that translates over to a new game experience.
In other news, Aphrodite has taken to sleeping in my lap, or on the armrest on my recliner when I'm playing or watching TV. And she's taken to sleeping next to my head, in the same spots Ishtar used to sleep in on my bed when I'm laying down. I think she realizes something is wrong, and she's trying to make me feel better. It's comforting. She's not one to cuddle like Ish was, but just having her there with me, it's enough. It's reassuring. I miss my little princess, though. So much. Every single day.
The worst part of all of this is how I keep expecting to see her sleeping on my bed, or to have her jump in my lap as I sit here watching TV, to hear her meowing at me, calling to me to hold her or pet her. And then knowing that it isn't going to happen, because she isn't here anymore.
And I keep thinking that maybe I could have done more for her. That I didn't wait long enough to see if she was going to get better. My dad says that he thinks she had a mild stroke, which is why she deteriorated as fast as she did. The tumor seems so unlikely because she was fine up until that Thursday. She had no problems the day before it all started. But, a stroke would explain it. Only, she didn't really have the symptoms of a stroke, she wasn't wobbly when she did walk, her eyes weren't all funny, aside from the complete numbness in her leg and her utter lack of appetite... I don't know. I really don't fucking know. There was no reason for her to get as bad as she did in such a short amount of time. I guess I'm never going to know what really happened with her. And I think I'm going to be a bit of a mess until I get her ashes back. At least then it'll be final.
She's been gone since about 9:30 this morning. I feel empty. This house feels empty. Laying in bed without her feels wrong. I can still feel her in my arms. How she went from terrified to relaxed in seconds. And then she was gone. I haven't slept. I probably should, but I just lay here and cry. I have the worst headache, and my eyes are burning. I can't even bring myself to go to the planning meeting for Liz's baby shower. I can't fake a smile right now and plan something like that. I miss her. I want my Ishtar back.
awww :( sorry for the loss of your furry baby...
I was reliving these feelings two days ago- it was the sad anniversary of my girl Vegas who was 17 at the time. They *are* family. Everything changes when they go. It sucks.
Sorry for your loss. Cats become family and we mourn for them the same way.
Tomorrow. She's going in tomorrow. She isn't getting better, and now she's having trouble breathing. I can't see her suffering like this anymore. It isn't fair to her, my absolute selfishness. This is always the worst part of owning pets, it's the third time I've had to make this decision. I don't want to lose her, she's my Ishtar, my little princess, my little cuddle bug. But... I can't stand seeing her just there, existing. She doesn't eat, she doesn't drink, she can't really walk. She just stays in her bed, or on my bed, sleeping. She deserves better than this.
Tomorrow is going to be fun. I'm normally not one to enjoy planning parties, that's always been Liz's thing, but tomorrow we start planning her baby shower. And I'm actually excited to be part of that. She's my sister-in-law and it is my nephew, after all. I have all these great ideas. And, since everyone knows it's a boy, we don't have to do something stupid and gender neutral. Considering who else is involved in the planning, my mother, Liz's mother, and Liz's best friend Rose, it may be a little on the extravagant side, but it's okay. Liz totally deserves it. I can't wait!
On nights such as these, when sleep proves to be elusive, I lose myself in Skyrim. I forgot how awesome this game was. How I can just spend hours running across the map on Shadowmere. Thank God for the high health and quick regen, or that horse would be dead a hundred times over from my habit of climbing mountains with her instead of taking roads.
I really need to invest in some melatonin again.
Morrowind for The Elder Scrolls Online looks pretty awesome form what I've seen. I got the collector's digital edition pre-ordered and all ready for June, when it's released. It'll be nice to have a real reason to get lost in ESO again. I'll have to find a new guild, as my main one is pretty dead, but, that's fine. I can do things solo, I'm sure, until I find one. And there's always matchmaking and such for dungeons.
I have friends on Facebook that are on pretty extreme sides of the political spectrum, some very conservative and some extremely liberal, so I've been seeing the stuff about the Boy Scouts allowing girls who identify as males into their ranks a lot. Honestly, I don't see anything wrong with it. If a girl wants to be part of the Boy Scouts, why stop her? That's something I could never understand, the segregation between boys and girls and the Scouts.
I suppose it's why I love the Young Marine program so much. There is no separation of gender. Male or female, they all do the same things, they're all able to earn ranks and ribbons and take part in awesome things. I think the military aspect throws some people off, I've heard that when I was in the program as a teenager, that I was being groomed for military service, which just isn't true. I mean, sure, a good amount of people who graduate out of the program do wind up serving, but that's not what it's about. It's about learning respect, discipline, how to be a leader, doing community service. I took part in parades and color guards, camping trips and week long trips on actual Marine bases with both boys and girls. The only time I was allowed to take part in something no male was able to, was when I was 16 and was invited to New York with 11 other girls for a few days to attend a Woman's Conference at the United Nations and Columbia University.
So, when I have kids, that's the youth program I'll put them into. Not to say anything ill towards the Boy and Girl Scouts, it's just not something I can personally get behind. I don't believe children should be segregated because they are male or female. They shouldn't be thrown into a different group because of gender. No, let them grow alongside each other, wearing the same uniform and taking part in the same activities. They honestly should just do away with the Boy and Girl Scouts, just throw them all together and let them have fun and make friends and learn things. I don't see why that's not a thing already.
Part of Girl Scouts is when it started and by whom.
A woman founded Girl Scouts in 1912. The intent, girls hanging out together, talking together, mentoring each other, helping the community, self reliance. It was a club to raise female empowerment.
It doesn't serve a purpose for girls and young women anymore so I don't support it.
|World Visitor Map|
|*tugs on the blanket*|
|Dracula started it all for me. Since, I have enjoyed new versions of the vampire - especially via Vampire: The Masquerade.|
|The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any. - Alice Walker|