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Katarina's Journal



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14 entries this month

 

XIIII

18:06 Aug 05 2006
Times Read: 556


I'm standing on the cusp

My perceptions are shifting

I'm filled with energy

Changing, moving

Meeting people, who are

Going under transitions

Carried along

It's bigger than me



__ and still waiting

What do I want to be

When I grow up

What do I want

Out of this life

What do I hope

For my future

I don't dare dream

This is too important



For the first time

I'm making a mark

Influenced by their views

Channeling energy

Humming with excitement

Thought patterns expanding

Didn't think I could do this

It's bigger than me


COMMENTS

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XIII

17:51 Aug 05 2006
Times Read: 557


It is

So cold and wet

Foggy

Inside my head

Heavy clouds

Behind my eyes

Waiting for thunder

Inside my life



It is grey

No colors anymore

Everything's the same

Nobody anymore

It is grey

Just sums up my life

Broke up my world

Slicing and sharp



Walking on needles

Standing, straight up

Numbing emotions

Inside, my heart

Looking in windows

In search of a soul

Seems to have lost mine

Can I borrow yours



It is

So cold and wet

Looking in a mirror

Am I fading yet

Fighting back the thunder

With all my might

Don't let the clouds out

Behind my eyes


COMMENTS

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XII

17:45 Aug 05 2006
Times Read: 558


She's inside me

Screaming

For your touch



She's inside me

Chained and whipped

Locked in a room



She's inside me

When she sees you

She cries, I don't



I don't see you

I don't hear you

It's her, not me


COMMENTS

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XI

17:43 Aug 05 2006
Times Read: 559


Talking to the stranger

Inside of me

If you talk to her loudly

She speak through me



Talk to the stranger

A part of me

Think I'm going crazy

Too slowly



Talking to the stranger

Inside of me

I really wish she would

Stop bothering me



Talk to the stranger

Confessing her lies

Whispered truths too many

Commit suicide


COMMENTS

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X

17:41 Aug 05 2006
Times Read: 560


Bored out of my

Mind why are you

Here inside my

Mind yet so far

Away can't touch you yet

I feel you inside my

Dreams you are

So real to me then

I wake up and am

Bored out of my

Mind until the next

Dream I have of

You


COMMENTS

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IX

17:34 Aug 05 2006
Times Read: 563


Look at the picture

Then look at me

See the difference

Can't put me away



I don' always smile

Or wear pretty clothes

But I know inside

You hide the truth



See who you are

From the inside out

Practice with a mirror

But not for long



Because you look at me

Your shattered self

And wonder who

Got left behind


COMMENTS

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VIII

17:31 Aug 05 2006
Times Read: 564


Open your eyes

And see the dark

The prince of light

Upon a cross

Dying for a faith now

Is that what you want

Stand upon a hard rock

And survive the flood



Have been called a shepperd

King of Nazareth

The only son of Jew's God

With a servants sould and mind

One is the same

And the same for us

Is this the fate you want

The religion you carve



I see within you

The darkest light

Silver and Gold

At the same time

Beelzebub too

Sent his son to us

Which crazy fate

Does our sould want


COMMENTS

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VII

17:26 Aug 05 2006
Times Read: 565


Bright light is flashing

Into your opened eye

Back into the darkness

For that's where we are



Close your eyes darling

Don't think, don't try

Take the chalice of blood

Drink, and then die



Black is a safe color

It surrounds and protects

Black like your nightmare

They're coming back



Accept your fate

Don't think don't try

Walk proud in your chains

You were born to die



Bright smile flashing

Into your face

Back into the darkness

To hide your own fears



Christmas lights

Sorrounding a tree

Rip it out of the socket

Burned for a belief


COMMENTS

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VI

17:20 Aug 05 2006
Times Read: 566


In a dark storm

Swelling within my heart

Lightning bolts are shooting

Tearing me apart

Raindrops falling

Sliding down my face

A feeling of helplessness

I signed my own fate


COMMENTS

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V

17:17 Aug 05 2006
Times Read: 567


Thrown of the see -saw

Inside my head

Feels a little bit

Off balance

Feeling the cold rain

On my skin

Hoping it could clear

The fog away


COMMENTS

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IV

17:15 Aug 05 2006
Times Read: 568


Self - doubt has the ability

To leech away your strenght

Eat away to your very core

Stripping away

All your self - defenses

And leaves you naked, exposed

To the worst critic imaginable

Yourself


COMMENTS

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III

17:12 Aug 05 2006
Times Read: 569


Listening to the silence

Listening to the pain

I know you can't hear me

I try anyway...


COMMENTS

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II

17:10 Aug 05 2006
Times Read: 570


You see me

But you don't see me

You look at me

Then through me

I love you

But I don't love you

A needle in the haystack

Have we found it?

Questions to ask

Answers already known

A heart beating fast

And then slower

You see me

But you don't see me

'Cause I'm made of glass

You see what you want

False promises broken

And so become true

Rules made to be broken

But what if you do?

Stong trees snapped

By path of gentle wind

The weak grass survives

By bowing down to it

You look at me

But...

Do you see me

Or what you want me to be?


COMMENTS

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I

17:06 Aug 05 2006
Times Read: 571


In a grey world

Where the sun hasn't shone in ages

Grey plastered

Figurines

Trying to protect their feelings

Streets are dusty

Pollution in the air

Why doesn't anybody care

Like mindless zombies

We're living our lives

Trying to be somebody else


COMMENTS

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