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Sure, sometimes we say we love Edward Cullen so much that we worship him, but some people are taking it to another level – they're making their own Twilight religion! They're taking the term OME really serious!

(And no April Foolin' today. This story is for real!)

"Cullenism is on the rise, taking dedicated Twihards by storm. They believe the Twilight books should be read LIKE the bible and that followers must make a pilgrimage to Forks at least once in their lives (bring your rain slicker). They even believe the Cullens are real (umm, we wish!). (Read more about Cullenism at The Examiner.)

Not sure if Cullenism is really for us just yet, but we figured maybe we should try to make some of our own commandments for the religion:

- Thou shalt wear golden contacts. Even to sleep.

- Thou shalt drink fruit punch. Or cherry soda. Or cranberry juice. Basically, it's gotta be red.

- Thou shalt eat all food with Forks. Even soup. Good luck with that. And no slurping from the bowl.

- Thou shalt not take Robert Pattinson's name in vain. Except when you're screaming it at the top of your lungs at his next public appearance. And in the middle of the night when you're dreaming of him.

- Christmas: No. Cullenmas: Yes




The 10 Commandments - As Spoken by the Cullens
1 - Thou shall not drink human blood.
2 - Thou shall not be seen in the sun light.
3 - Thou shall not get freaky with a human.
5 - Thou shall not drive a car any less then a BMW or Volvo.
6 - Thou shall only play baseball during thunder storms.
7 - Thou shall not stay in one place for too long.
8 - Thou shall not tell other humans of their kind, besides Bella.
9 - Thou shall not invade the werewolfs.
10 - Thou shall not touch Edward's Hair!"

-examiner.com



I cannot BELIEVE this.............~laughs so hard that I'm crying~

Does anyone believe that Twilighters are taking this obsession just a bit too far??? Or WAY too far???

Do you take this so-called new found religion seriously?
Would you practice it?

Why? Why not?

I didn't write this. It came from examiner.com, and a thread posting in a vampirefreaks cult.

I wrote the questions at the very bottom.

Eh what possible positive conversation could this bring here? Other than the whole " Twilight is a ... for ..." monumental VR commentaries towards it.

... Where the hell is the 4th commandment for the list?

This seems like a big bunch of shit to me.

um *supresses laughter* wow dest... stupidity at its highest peak for sure. I don't really think you can make this crap up... but how in GODS name do you come across all of this BIZARRO crap???

Well, I get emails from people saying to read something. Then when I'm reading something on the website, I see another interesting article, and another. etc.

But, I'm in the cult on vf that this article came from. And I just had to post it.

Hmm......I don't know, why isn't there a 4th commandment? A type-o?

Guess it simply proves Twihards are essentially prepubescent with no ability to count. :|

This is a definition of Twihard by UrbanDictionary.com:

Twihard
An serious/obsessive reader of the Twilight Saga by Stephenie Meyer, one leap above Twilighters.

The difference between being a Twilighter and being a Twihard, is that Twihards have embraced a new Twiligion... er.... I mean, religion based on Twilight. They live and breath Twilight. Most Twihards are for Edward and Bella. Therefore, those Twihards are all for true love & love at first sight. Point out one thing to a Twihard, and they can relate it to Twilight instantly. Savage and wild, they need every single thing to be perfect in the upcoming Twilight movie.




WAYS TO TELL IF YOU ARE A TWIHARD.
(Or at least, me being a Twihard myself, this is what I do)
1. You constantly check the Lex for new updates. Daily. (Six times an hour for me.)
2. Twilight Tuesday is the most important day of the week.
3. You dream of going to Forks, or living in Forks.
4. You have urges to visit Italy.
5. It's sick, but you wish Vampires totally existed so you can marry one.
6. You refer to Twilight as "literary crack" or a "textually transmitted disease"
7. You've supplied said literary crack to your friends, and wouldn't talk to them until they read the series.
8. Your favorite fruit is now a red apple.
9. Ruffled tulips are one of your favorite flowers

Here's the link: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Twihard

It all sounds pretty idiotic to me, lol.

Some people will do anything to make impressions on Twilight fans.
To me this is just a money making scheme.
Saddness when people are misdirected by a movie.

I am thinking that this subject matter (twilight)needs to find a grave with roses. It has been done and redone immensely. There will be no new religions based on vampire of any kind in the near future... Nuff said.

As well, an fuel to the twilight fire will just feed it more. Enough already.

I do think that Twilighters are taking this obsession way too far. Vampyrism is not anything like or even close to the Twilight series.

I do not take this so called "religion" seriously at all. It is very stupid and childish. Why practice a religion based on a book like Twilight series.

Its childish to try to make a religion off of a book.

This all started when "buffy" left the airwaves. Colleges even taught Buffy-ism 101 as credit courses! Bring back the slayer and this twilight will gather dust. New religion or not.

THAT.....is fucking intense...in an insane way.
Now, i can admit to liking the twilight series very much.
For the fact that I believe the writing skills used in the books are fantastic.
But...
this is ridiculous.

I was actually pissed when i found out that all the people i went to school with in the beginning of high school years ago, liked vampires suddenly...and why??
because they had seen a twilight movie trailer last year.
Never heard of the books, didn't care.
And quite frankly, they thought that any kid who liked werewolves, shape shifters, vampires, or anything mythical...were "freaks'', goths...whatever...
and then suddenly...cult admiration.
it's fucking weird. and irritating
because anyone who noticed this shit like i did, watched it progress into this insanity, knows that if it hadn't become a fucking trend for those obsessive people, then they would have never even come across it, or gone out of their way and get outside their boxes.

except, now, it seems that if you say "I'm into vampires" it's like, "well...who isn't?"

so now if one says i like vampires, everyone associates that persons interest with twilight and assumes that that is where the interest came from in the first place.

ahhgg. it just makes things very unoriginal in my eyes.
and i hate the fucktards who follow the shit like morons.

lol sorry if I've offended you. sort of. but i think the only way anyone would truly get offended is if they think my criticism is speaking of them in particular...which would mean, of course, that that is the most probable reason for your anger.


:)

*Chuckles* To think that the vampire culture is doing something seriously wrong if the vampire cannot found their own religion based off of their beliefs, and yet... Without even as much as a backlashed word, a book gets its own religion based off of "marketing" alone.

Can we say "trend" religion? What classification would this sort of "religion" fit into? Orthodox? Unorthodox? Lutherin? Pentacostile? Holocaustile? Dare I say "Jahovah's Witness" -esque?

kind of, i mean when i first saw the movie trailors for twilight i thougth cool a vampire movie, then all of sudden all of these teenagers just ruined it for me by acting like twits over this stuff, now you have these abcrobie kids thinking there goth because oooo i like twilight, mall goths make me laugh (I work in a mall so i have to deal with them all day long)

thats were i get the name twitlighters from cause they act like twits.

that is such a joke, to worship those who aren't even real. Are the people crazy? Ok, some peopl need a reality check.

It just show that the world is about to end, and this makes it a well supported reason for the outcomes and the 'tip of the iceberg' hehe.

Hell, has congress approved of the establishment of "the Cullen Church"? has it passed the appropriate fields nessessary to entitle it a "religious" following? Does "the Cullen" religion have a "alter-ego counterpart" that it can call its "devil"? Does it have the ediquette amount of followers to be proclaimed a religion and not just a "cult"? Does it have doctrines? Does it have a heirarchy, such as priests, deacons and such?

Call us back when you have the nessessary paperwork. -signed "Congress"

Wow. I loved the Twilight books... the movie was tolerable but this just makes me sad... really sad.

As far as the 4th one being missing... I think they were just hoping nobody really noticed there wasn't a 4th commandment.


So what is supposed to happen if a commandment is broken? Stephenie Meyer is going to get mad at you? Is Robert Pattinson going to get deeply disappointed and not get covered in glitter again?

I have no clue. It's all an absurdity to me, and I feel sorry for Forks when the get flooded by Twihards making their pilgrimage. Forks wallet will get fat, but I mean it's citizens. And what they're going to have to go through.

Is somebody going to make Twibible??? Will it be Stephenie Meyer who writes it? Will it float her career if she does or ultimately sink it?

As for representation, you don't need congress to approve it's an actual religion. Unless, you want it to be government funded, and not pay for everything out of your own pocket.

The main reason scientologists want scientology to be declared an official religion is because they want that government funding.

Well, I think it's stupid- I also think it's people just having fun. Not much different than a 'Kiss Army' and all the other clubs out there devoted to something big in pop culture.

Twilight gets way too much attention from people who hate it and want to see these forum threads disappear. They would disappear if no one posted to them. But it seems to have a sneaky way of making sure people keep them active :P

soulshroude : "Can we say "trend" religion? What classification would this sort of "religion" fit into? Orthodox? Unorthodox? Lutherin? Pentacostile? Holocaustile? Dare I say "Jahovah's Witness" -esque?"

LOL That made me think... LOL All the Twinerds and going door to door to spread the Gospel of Edward!! LOL

Thus saith the Lord our Edward : "Blessed are those who sell team edward shirts for they shall inherit thy glitter and prosper until a werewolf kills them."
And on the seventh day he saw light from the sun and did sparkle in many different colors. The virgin Bella saw this and said "It is good"

LOL am I going to far?? LOL this is just TOO rich LOL...

the books are pretty good, if nothing like what vampires traditionally are, but...a religion based on a book series? someone is getting rich off of it, and the great mall masses are falling for it hook, line, and sinker.

*This just in, Tom Cruise backing away from Scientology to score with the Twiligion that was heard about over the VampireRave website. "Apparently, my peers thought I was quite depressed about Stuart Townsend taking over my role of Lestat for the movie: Queen of the Damned., so I backed off of Scientology and asked Cullen, if he would forgive me of my sins." More celebrities soon to follow in Cruises footsteps. More to come...*

Now THAT is a headliner!!

(Disclaimer - Not to be taken as a literal news headline, the names and religions are based on FICTION alone and should be practiced and or viewed as such.)

Umm are you guys reading the same list as me? This is obviously a rather funny hoax. I was giggling a lot at it and then I saw the responses and my jaw dropped. It is a joke, I promise you:) Chill:)

Just as ~Images~ has already stated ~Irony~: "Twilight gets way too much attention from people who hate it and want to see these forum threads disappear. They would disappear if no one posted to them. But it seems to have a sneaky way of making sure people keep them active "

The children love to keep threads such as this active, for the purpose of keeping the subject active. Advertising on a manipulative basis. So far, it has worked wonders, since "we all" seem to magnet toward it, either out of sarcasm, or mockery. If we do not reply at all, as if a grave has shown itself, these types of threads "twilight-esque" will start to deminish and disappear entirely.

Dont give the kids what they want...

The stupidity and obsession of mankind knows no bounds,i am seriously tempted to hunt down and kill those freaks (though i don't need a reason to kill, these idiots just....deserve to die and need to die.) regardless if the film was good or bad (i haven't watch it or want to)
this obsession with it is just out of control,they have done this before with star wars,those people are nuts and seriously need professional help or a good killing.

Seems these days many want to "believe" almost in anything once they label it and make it something and yet it is "meaningless" and "senseless". Does that make sense??? They need to work on themselves and put effort into those things which merit devote attention.

Exactly, Irony and vvSoulshroudevv... if you're reading this and think these people are serious about this religion even- I think the joke is on you. "OMG it's gone too far!" I think you've taken it too far by believing it and have set out to spread the word. In the end Twilight just got more advertisement.

I read them and also enjoyed them for what they were. I was not expecting anything 'adult' or close to reality. It was lighter fantasy written for young readers, I never took it any further than that. The hype is hilarious- and kids in every generation hop on what they feel is a fun bandwagon. In the 80s girls were dressing like Madonna. In the 60s girls were crying over The Beatles (and some fans still do it over their icons). None of this is Twilight-exclusive behavior, Twilight invented nothing new with this kind of stuff... teenie-boppers have always been squealing and going gaga over things they like- and vampires in books and movies is hardly a new thing.

The religion, however, is an obvious joke. People are playing around... like Bill Maher's New Rules, or Letterman's Top 10. Nothing more.

Well, I was thinking about Scientology. You may laugh at all these people but one never knows. When a science fiction writer of little note can create a religion, the skies the limit. It is no different when the Vampire Chronicles were in their heyday. You saw everyone with IDs of either Lestat something or Louis. There have always been people who get obsessed and it is not just with vampires. Look at the Elvis obsession that still exists long after his death and theories that he didn't die but left or was taken by aliens, lol.

It isn't just kids who like these stories, don't make that mistake. The media is cashing in on the popularity of the vampire mythos in any form that seems unique. Her books were selling well before they thought of making the movies. What's next I wonder? Could there be a spin off tv series after all the movies die down and who will they choose for the main parts?

I felt I needed to tell Mr. Cullen to get a haircut. I thought the character was a bit lack luster since he supposedly had been 17 for some time, but didn't appear to have matured inwardly. It is not the author's fault for all the hype and obsession. I'm sure she is laughing all the way to the bank.

It is so sad to see silly little teens following such a pathetic excuse for a vampire family....Its like the preppy escape for rich kids who want to annoy their parents...and if any of them take this "cullenism" for real then I really pity them.

Both of them. Honestly, guys its really hard to stop laughing at the idea of it. My friend jeebus started pitching twibible verses to me earlier and I almost never got rid of the stitch in my side.

Omg this is taking a popular movie way to far... Geez where is the line between liking a movie and going looney about it.

imagesinwords, how do you know it is a joke? People, movies, and music have been worshipped for far less in the past. There are loons and lonely, and desperate people out there that look for any outlet, or form of alternate reality that they can grab onto. This has been proven time and time again over history.

I believe is a new found mental illness of actually believing in bad jokes, I mean is it really that funny or surprising that a fanatics make such things at such heights if it happened to be real? I believe thats not funny but something that can potentially tell me the degree our next generation is heading in regards of grasping on "reality" or in a way rationalizing in order to separate the level in which you use the right side of the brain with the left, not the exclusion of both; It seams like a banana magic trick for monkeys where the monkey is drooling in excitement ( the whole bible thing) but I wouldn't be surprised if it actually occurred: given that the behavior of many individuals transcended the ordinary level of attention to grasp it as a reality and remount on the search for a sparkling figure or to have problems of superficial selection and platonic love, I mean this wouldn't be such a surprise given that I've seen the level in which passes above this satire, and yeah at once i loved the vampire figure and even Xmen alot, not to the height of looking for Magneto though.

The real Irony I see and a funny nerve about it is that is actually not a full mock of Twilighters but to religions way to set parameters, setting rules and reverence to a ficticious being in which the audience or in this case the subscribers don't know the where abouts of the figure but yet looks to find it with self idealizations, self inflicted punishments in reverence of stories, here says and interpretations of earlier writers and add ons of time.

How do I know it is a joke, honestly? How could it not be? There is a 101 Rules of Satanism floating around that is also a complete and total joke.

Wow. Just... wow.

Follow the path of the naive, little ones... Down the dark shadowy trail ... The Lord Cullen is the shepherd you shall NOT walk with.

It is a hoax as much as the swine flu is a hoax. People believe the media because it is something that makes sense, but until you see actual proof and people wearing shirts that have the Cullen religion with copywrite somewhere on the shirt itself and or religious symbols dedicated to the cause and advertisements on the telly with bibles in bookstores with the name Cullen on them... Then mayhaps you could start to believe it is real.

But until then, when you are actually getting paid to advertise a movie with outlandish hype that has been running a muck within forum threads such as this... Don't do it, it is irritating already.

Just wondering something here. For all of you who see the twilight as an over-rated, overly talked about sensation or a joke, and for those of you who find these conversations irritating, then why do you participate in these threads? If it is so irritating then ignore it....Unless of course you just really want to be in on the conversation, I dont see any point in stating repeatedly that it annoys you. Please dont get me wrong, you are entitled to your opinion just as the rest of us, and I am not criticizing....I was just wondering

Yes, you are all right about this, the twilight thing has gone too far with people trying to give it PR.

But still you have to admit. The whole thing, being a bad joke or not, is funny.

well it wont be the first or the last movie to be hyped as a real life interest, how about lord of the rings where people were learning the languges, or star trek or star wars people becoming obsessed with it all .... just a harmless gimick for people with the time to find interest in it all and act it out LMAO

Actually Star Trek has Twilight fans all beat to hell in regards to this stuff- Trekkies? Hello... conventions beyond compare??? The 'Kiss Army' beats the Twilighters with all the merchandise and lengths they've gone to. But, it's all done in good fun.

Well ye4s I will agreewith ya on that aspect Images,there is no biggerfolowing then thoseyou have listed, and yes the twlight obsession has startedto get redone to death lol

this HAS to be joke? a religion based off of a fictional book? people are taking things way too far, i admit it's a good series but how can you form a religion off of a COMPLETELY fictional book? it sounds like a load of bull! and aren't these people who are all of a sudden so interested in vampires the same ones who used to think of them as freaks?

Oh my god! Yes, I agree. Isn't it weird that these people that are so gaga over the whole thing the same ones that use to point and laugh at us for wearing black lipstick and black clothes??!! Funny how it's changed.
I find it weird that the books were out way before the movie was made and some of us were on edge just waiting for book number 3 to be out. Made into a movie and everyone has to go nuts.

That's completely stupid, yeah they are taking it WAY too far. Guh! I think it's probably just a phase though, it'll probably (hopefully) pass after a while.
It's just as stupid as the 'Church of the Fonz' that was on Family Guy.



I imagine the author of the Twilight books must feel both flattered and highly concerned.

Still, to me, I can't see how anybody is reading this and seeing it wasn't intended to be a joke, just like The Family Guy thing just mentioned. It actually makes me hesitant to ever make a joke on here, for fear of so many people seeing it and saying I was 'going too far'. Of course this Church of Cullen sounds utterly ridiculous- it was meant to.

But beyond all that- not much is going on with this thread besides - 'they've gone too far', 'it's crap' people are saying the same things over and over... well yeah, it totally is. And really guys, isn't it time everyone give Twilight a rest in this forum? It's only interesting I am not saying this people who 'love' Twilight.