The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

Resident Evil: Extinction

Ma'am, I was already a bloodsucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase!

(sorry about that, I totally meant to re-open the thread)

Bee Movie

No, we mean like your monster name. You know, what do people scream when they see you coming? Like "Look out! Here comes...?"

Monsters vs. Aliens

I've got to believe there's something out there better than this. Otherwise I'll just curl up into a larval position and weep.

Antz

No, venti is twenty. Large is large. In fact, tall is large and grande is Spanish for large. Venti is the only one that doesn't mean large. It's also the only one that's Italian. Congratulations, you're stupid in three languages.

Role Models

He must be the stupidest son of a b*tch alive, but he sure is fast!

Forrest Gump

I just don't think I can continue to live in a place that embraces and nurtures apathy as if it was virtue.

Se7en

I say hurl. If you blow chunks and she comes back, she's yours. But if you spew and she bolts, then it was never meant to be.

Wayne's World

I got a feeling that behind those jeans is something wonderful just waiting to get out.

Boogie Nights (1997)

Oh yes, I have seen you. It was like a flash forward in time. You're beautiful.

Hideaway (1995)

I'll tell the lawyers about the diary. But, you gotta forget all about Adrian. She's sick, you understand? Come on, you already showed me.

The Crush

Oh, I'm dry humping the shit out of you.

Bad Teacher

Allow me to be the first to say that what we have done here is *not* a good thing. It's definitely not a good thing. But it was, given the circumstances, the smart play.

Very Bad Things

If you're staring at me, it better be because I'm the suspect. If not, get back to work or I swear you're all demoted to something that involves touching shit with your hands!

Eagle Eye

Well, that's good news. Saved me the trouble. I had to practically twist his arm to get him blow your cover at the CIA. You see, he wanted you to come out of this alive.

Salt

Man... I didn't join the army to pull paper our of people's asses.

Three Kings

Charlie, there are two kinds of thieves in this world: The ones who steal to enrich their lives, and those who steal to define their lives. Don't be the latter. Makes you miss out on what's really important in this life.

The Italian Job

Well, shoot! We ain't come this far just to dump this thing in the drink. What's the nearest target opportunity?

Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964)

Nurse Ratched, Nurse Ratched! The Chief voted! Now will you please turn on the television set?

One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest

She don't know me. I'm a straight-up thug. I shot Tupac. Yes, I did. We was arguing over a parking place. I didn't kill him, though. No, that wasn't me.

Madea's Family Reunion

It's not just the swearing. Forgive me for prying, but did one of you, um, fornicate...

Bad Santa

Hey is this the kind of retard that drools and rubs shit in his hair and all that, 'cause I'm gonna have a hard time eatin' 'round that kind of thing now. Just like I am with antique furniture and midgets. You know that, I can't so much as drink a damn glass of water around a midget or a piece of antique furniture.

Sling Blade

A hospital? Have you looked in a mirror lately, burnt man walking? Even the entire cast of "E.R." couldn't put you back together again.

Spawn (1997)

Especially important is the warning to avoid conversations with the demon. We may ask what is relevant but anything beyond that is dangerous. He is a liar. The demon is a liar. He will lie to confuse us. But he will also mix lies with the truth to attack us. The attack is psychological, Damien, and powerful. So don't listen to him. Remember that - do not listen.

The Exorcist (1973)

How can he know that? Maybe he's wrong. It's insane. I won't have anything to do with murdering a little boy. He's not responsible. I won't do it!

The Omen

I want you to loan me $200,000 in cash.

The Money Pit (1986)

I'm trying to make things easy for you, Hawk. You don't need Michael as a meal ticket anymore. You're on a free ride. So take the truck, take the money. Start a new life, *start your own family*!

Over the Top

You don't have to make us feel safe, because you've made us feel brave.

Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children

I have already prepared my counter-proposal. It reads thusly: You may strategically place your wonderful lips upon my posterior and kiss it repeatedly!

Dark Shadows

It's time, Robby! It's time! They knew and they let it happen! To KIDS! Okay? It could have been you, it could have been me, it could have been any of us. We gotta nail these scumbags! We gotta show people that nobody can get away with this; Not a priest, or a cardinal or a freaking pope!

Spotlight

Do not, my friends, become addicted to water. It will take hold of you, and you will resent its absence!

Mad Max: Fury Road

And stop bleeding on my money!

Get the Gringo

There's some kids in a cabin. They got a disease. They just gave it to Dennis.

Cabin Fever

Criminals are like weeds, Alfred; pull one up, another grows in its place. This is about the future of the world. This is my legacy.

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

What's the matter, you too good for this ten dollars? Huh? You too good for it? It's a good ten dollars. Know somethin' Mikey? You make me laugh. You know that?

Mean Streets

That's what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age.

Dazed and Confused (1993)

I would like to say this. Tardiness is not something you can do on your own. Many, many people contributed to my tardiness. I would like to thank my parents for never giving me a ride to school, the LA city bus driver who took a chance on an unknown kid and last but not least, the wonderful crew from McDonalds who spend hours making those egg McMuffins without which I might never be tardy.

Clueless

Do you know - do you have any idea how much - how much I wanted you? How much I loved YOU, you asshole. And then - what an idiot I am. How pathetic is that? Me in love with you. And then Bobby comes along, and I fell in love with this one, and I think that we... that the three of us, maybe we could... F*ck it. Just leave me alone and go back in the house and have a drink.

A Home at the End of the World

Maybe. Just maybe. And maybe I took it to Old Lady Simmons and told her, and the money was all there. But I still got a three day vacation because it never showed up. And maybe the next week, Old Lady Simmons had this new suit on when she came to school.

Stand By Me

Everything's built on that! That's all we got, boy, f*ckin' all. So I hope you know that, even if you don't never know the rest! You count the damn few times we have been together in nearly twenty years and you measure the short f*cking leash you keep me on - and then you ask me about Mexico and tell me you'll kill me for needing somethin' I don't hardly never get. You have no idea how bad it gets! I'm not you... I can't make it on a coupla high-altitude f*cks once or twice a year!

Brokeback Mountain

Not gonna be possible, Marlak. She's not your woman. You can't own people. Except for the guy who bought all of us. Apparently, he can.

Year One

If you look carefully at my lips, you'll realize that I'm actually saying something else. I'm not actually telling you about the several ways I'm gradually murdering Joan.

Naked Lunch

What's there to take? The disease has just revealed its purpose. We don't have to worry about contagion anymore... I know what the disease wants.

The Fly

This city is afraid of me. I have seen its true face. The streets are extended gutters and the gutters are full of blood and when the drains finally scab over, all the vermin will drown. The accumulated filth of all their sex and murder will foam up about their waists and all the whores and politicians will look up and shout "Save us!"... and I'll whisper "no."

Watchmen

I know you did. I mean, part of me even wanted you to, but then what? Make you feel any better? You just have to decide what kind of a man you want to grow up to be, Clark; because whoever that man is, good character or bad, he's... He's gonna change the world.

Man of Steel

Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead.

Barfly

California's like a beautiful, wild... beautiful, wild girl on heroin... who's high as a kite, thinkin' she's on top of the world, not knowing she's dying even if you show her the marks.

Rumble Fish

Maybe I need to look at another face... even one as ugly as yours.

Enemy Mine

You think you have won! What is light without dark? What are you without me? I am a part of you all. You can never defeat me. We are brothers eternal!

Legend

Every minute you don't tell us why you are here, I cut off a finger.

Spies Like Us (1985)

The name's Francis Soyer, but everybody calls me Psycho. Any of you guys call me Francis, and I'll kill you.

Stripes

You know, ih... if I'm a... a King, where's my power? Can I... can I form a government? Can I... can I l-levy a tax, declare a... a war? No! And yet I am the seat of all authority. Why? Because... the nation believes that when I s... I speak, I speak for them - but I can't speak.

The King's Speech

Everything you value in this world I gave to you, I provided you with a house and a son. You remember that, you ungrateful piece of sh*t!

Godsend

I'll tell you what, though. Um, when all this is over... me and you are gonna move out to the same neighborhood together. OK? And, um... and we'll get old, and we'll get fat. And there ain't gonna be all this black-white between us.

Remember the Titans

I want you to take a moment, and I want you to look each other in the eyes. I want you to put each other in your hearts forever because forever is about to happen here in just a few minutes. I want you to close your eyes, and I want you to think about Boobie Miles, who is your brother. And he would die to be out there in that field with you tonight. And I want you to put that in your hearts. Boys my heart is full. My heart is full.

Friday Night Lights

He has one class in Human Sexuality, and now he's Harvey Milk.

22 Jump Street

I hope you're not apopleptic because they're going to take a lot of pictures.

Zoolander 2

I'm being torn apart. I want to be free of this pain. I know what I have to do but I don't know if I have the strength to do it. Will you help me?

Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Joey, listen. I think you owe both of us an apology for the name that you called Virginia.

Bugsy

I'm gonna listen to you spin the Cloverleaf scenario. The story of greed, sex and murder. And the parts that I don't like, I'm gonna edit out.

Who Framed Roger Rabbit

No matter how big a guy might be, Nicky would take him on. You beat Nicky with fists, he comes back with a bat. You beat him with a knife, he comes back with a gun. And if you beat him with a gun, you better kill him, because he'll keep comin' back and back until one of you is dead.

Casino

I admire you as a policeman - particularly your adherence to violence as a necessary adjunct to the job.

L.A. Confidential

Alright, listen to me. You pull up right where she lives, right? Before you get outta the car, you lock both doors. Then, get outta the car, you walk over to her. You bring her over to the car. Dig out the key, put it in the lock and open the door for her. Then you let her get in. Then you close the door. Then you walk around the back of the car and look through the rear window. If she doesn't reach over and lift up that button so that you can get in: dump her.

A Bronx Tale

If my best friend hides his farts from me then what else is he hiding from me, and why does that make me feel so alone?

Swiss Army Man

There is a line you cross, you don't never come back from. Point of no return. Dave crossed it. I'm here with him. That's means I am going along for the ride. The whole ride. All the way to the end of the line, wherever that is.

Carlito's Way

 Police! There's a man running around the serpentarium waving a gun! He looks dangerous!

Hideout in the Sun

I, uh, betrayed my wife. I betrayed myself. I've killed men, and I ordered men to be killed. No, it's useless. I killed... I ordered the death of my brother; he injured me. I killed my mother's son. I killed my father's son.

The Godfather: Part III

You always were a problem for me, Joey. When mom brought you home from the hospital, I tried to strangle you in your crib. I guess all kids try to do that. She caught me, whacked the daylights out of me.

A History of Violence

It's like a barber chair. And when they ask me "you got anything to say?". I'll say, "sure, give me a haircut, a shave, and a massage, with one of those nice new electric massages".

Angels with Dirty Faces

A man your age comes to a place like this, either he's running away from something or he has nowhere else to go.

Hoosiers (1986)

Why that dirty, no good, yellow-bellied stool. I'm gonna give it to him right in the head the first time I see him.

The Public Enemy

Every word that he says is a dagger in me. In my life, there has been no one like him anywhere. Anywhere where he is. If he asks, I'll be his.

Les Misérables (2012)

Do you know how you kill a tiger, Father Auguste? You tie up your best goat and wait.

Red Riding Hood

Anxiety is the dizziness of freedom.

Irrational Man

You're not going to lose me. You've given me a taste for life. I wanna be happy. Sleep in a bed, have roots. And you'll never be alone again, Mathilda. Please, go now, baby, go. Calm down, I'll meet you at Tony's in an hour, I love you, now go, go now.

Léon: The Professional

Man, how're we gonna tell his mama he brought us all the way out here just to kill himself?

Happy Feet

Wanna know something Jack? I like a guy who can use his head for something beside a hatrack!

The St. Valentine's Day Massacre

Let's not bring race into this, Ahmad. We got enough problems as it is.

The Bad News Bears (1976)

I'm sorry, Clfford. I know you mean well. I let everyone down. That's just the way I am.

My Bodyguard

Madam, you have suffered an emotional shock. I will notify a rape crisis center.

RoboCop

I'm going somewhere, but not with you. Buzzsaw took care of my traveling arrangements.

The Running Man

I loved it when you nuked Las Vegas. Suitably biblical ending to the place, don't you think?

WarGames

*Because*, man, *somewhere* in one of these memories is the *evidence*! If I got in far enough, I could reconstruct it!

TRON

I will be your Sherpa up the mountain of gayness.

Zack and Miri Make a Porno

You don't hate me. You hate not being me. But if you were born me, you would have never been you. So you can take my money, my life, but you can never be me.

The Sicilian

What am I doing with my life? I'm so pale. I should get out more. I should eat better. My posture is terrible. I should stand up straighter. People would respect me more if I stood up straighter. What's wrong with me? I just want to connect. Why can't I connect with people? Oh, right, it's because I'm dead. I shouldn't be so hard on myself. I mean, we're all dead. This girl is dead. That guy is dead. That guy in the corner is definitely dead. Jesus these guys look awful.

Warm Bodies

Age can wither me, Noodles. We're both getting old. All that we have left now are our memories. If you go to that party on Saturday night, you won't have those anymore. Tear up that invitation.

Once Upon a Time in America

This can't be Heaven. Max is here and she's Jewish.

The Final Girls

Oh, you wanna know? 'Cause the answer's easy! I'm BAD Ash... and you're GOOD Ash! You're a goody little two-shoes! Little goody two-shoes! Little goody two-shoes!

Army of Darkness

You know, I hear about this for weeks now. How they can't get in your room and they open the door and it bumps up against something on the floor, which I guess is you!

Tennis, Anyone...?

Half the killers in this country say the same thing. The voices. The voices told me to do it.

The Amityville Horror

All the way. A hot-pussied little whore, who arrived down here looking for freedom, a victim of Puritanical breeding, seeking release for strange new feelings.

Cannibal Ferox (awesome flick)

What is all this about the dead coming back to life again and... having to be killed a second time? I mean, what the hell's going on here?

Zombie

Popularity is the slutty little cousin of prestige.

Birdman or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance)

Think about what protecting Bernie gets us. Think about what offending Caspar loses us.

Miller's Crossing

I don't reckon you have to go with women to be a good daddy to a boy. You been real square-dealin' with me. The Bible says two men ought not lay together. But I don't reckon the Good Lord would send anybody like you to Hades. That Frank, he lives inside of his own heart. That's an awful big place to live in. You take good care of that boy.

Sling Blade

What can you expect when you're on top? You know? It's like Napoleon. When he was the king, you know, people were just constantly trying to conquer him, you know, in the Roman Empire. So, it's history repeating itself all over again.

Boogie Nights (1997)

How old do you think I am?
Really old.
Oh. Have a guess.
Probably at least, uh, 21.
I wish you were right.

Insidious

These days a woman can feel incompetent if she doesn't make time for blow jobs and a home-made lasagna.

The Hand That Rocks the Cradle

Hey, Helen, it looks like I cured your agoraphobia!

Copycat

Why? The world's here to be enjoyed, not to make you depressed. That's what work does, Harold, it makes you feel depressed.

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