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Have You ever been close to someone and if they got hurt You felt it too? I have, My sister. And when She died, all Her pain, sorrow, grief, hate, yes everything got in to me. I can still feel it, in every breath. I feel it when I get up in the morning and when I go to bed in the night.







I have always neen the evil one. I have nerver loved befor, all I loved was killing, blood and having fun with men and killing men for their blood, the best of fun. I have nerver been like this befor, I trusted love and it hurts more then all the cuts and wounds I ever got in My lifes. I love one that can't love Me back, people say Love hurts and yes it does.

What I would do to die today. I feel nothing but pain and I'm alone. The nightmares isn't getting better, I can't sleep, My sleeping pills doesn't help.



Maybe I try again, maybe I try to end this tonight. I can't do this anymore.

I'm Sorry Lily. But I can't take this.

I'm Sorry Master, I'm so sorry

Many things have been on My mind last Night, I didn't get any sleep again.



One: My Nightmare, this never ending thing that keeps Me awake almost every Night. I need some sleep.



Two: Love... and life... two things that can't go hand in hand. I'm in love, but love can not find Me. I may love others but they can't love Me. To never be loved is something that hurts. Many times have I tried to end this life, but My Master have stoped Me, I got scars in My heart and on My body.



Tre: Death... Many Nights have I this on My mind. I do not fear Death, I welcome it to My home, I welcome anyone that things that They can bring Death to Me.