The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

18:33 Feb 27 2009
Times Read: 683






Line Manager 1 - Me ??



scores to be announced next week when i get the results of my hearing.



Time to go get shitfaced on jack daniels and forget the world for a while.



tattoo update:



Now thinking of adding a banner above my pheonix something along the lines of:



Dont let the bastards grind you down



time to start searching to see which language it looks most awesome in (have seen it in latin and was kinda cool)



My pheonix is going to be 1/2 flame and shadow and 1/2 defined bird im thinking of the back 1/2 flame and shading with the front half totally visible and recognisable (need some good suggestions for sites with pheonix images (the tattoo ones i've seen have been very MEH) am kinda thinking more like an eagle style head for the brid with bigger wings.

11:44 Feb 26 2009
Times Read: 685

Have you ever noticed just how trippy your dream get when you dont eat and basically mainline caffine?



Intakes for yesterday:



Coffee - 8 large cups

Cigarettes - Only 10

Food - A couple of Rockys



The dream:



Im a pink kangaroo bouncing along the road, the skys the colour of static on your TV (i always wondered is gray classed as a colour or just a shade?) And im being chased by a sea of snapping turtles that are all wearing police hats...

23:31 Feb 24 2009
Times Read: 691

Warning semi rant/ semi wo is me post normal service will be resumed shortly thankyou for your patience



*TICK TOCK*



Tempus Fugit, the time has nearly come for yet another battle at work, i wonder is it me? if i were as shit as shye's saying surely the last two weeks would have been chaos? i mean surely... but they havent (or at least i dont think so)



Im really stressed out this week (took my Blood pressure at work today (borrowed my mates funky gadget) think it must be broken



147/120 *shrug* my mate lol'd and said thats bad...



roll on Friday so i can get the next stage of this epic fucking saga finished with (If it all goes to plan this nasty episode will be done and dusted and i can celebrate with a tattoo). and then the weekend (is it bad i wish my life away like this?)

and this is an awesome weekend, its the payday weekend so bring on the alcohol and associated madness



Caffeine intake for today: 11 large cups of black coffee

Nicotine intake: I killed a deck (20 cigarettes oops)

Food intake: 1 pizza bread at lunch

22:12 Feb 22 2009
Times Read: 695

I've been so certain of things for the last 2 years the last few months have really shaken me to my core. Its really really got me thinking abou the direction my life's been ehading of recent.



WHAT DO I WANT?



Im fairly certain i know, but theres a niggling doubt in my mind, i had thought my present company was a good career move, begining to wonder now. Do i go for a change of focus/ direction? or do i say fuck this for a game of soldiers liquidate my life, pack enough stuff for a few weeks and take me nd my bike away for a loong holiday/ adventure?



See previous statement WHAT DO I WANT FROM LIFE?



At this moment i really dont know, i just know i dont want to be in this position.

14:02 Feb 20 2009
Times Read: 703

I OWE MY MOTHER A LOT BECAUSE.....



1. She taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE.

'If you're going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.'



2. She taught me RELIGION.

'You better pray that will come out of the carpet.'



3. She taught me about TIME TRAVEL.

'If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week!'



4. She taught me LOGIC.

' Because I said so, that's why!'



5. She taught me MORE LOGIC.

'If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me.'



6. She taught me FORESIGHT.

'Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you're in an accident.'



7. She taught me IRONY

'Keep crying, and I'll give you something to cry a bout.'



8. She taught me about the science of OSMOSIS.

'Shut your mouth and eat your supper.'



9. She taught me about CONTORTIONISM.

'Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!'



10. She taught me about STAMINA.

'You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone.'



11. She taught me about WEATHER.

'This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.'



12. She taught me about HYPOCRISY.

'If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!'



13. She taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.

'I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.'



14. She taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION.

'Stop acting like your father!'



15. She taught me about ENVY.

'There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do.'



16. She taught me about ANTICIPATION.

'Just wait till your father get's home.'



17. She taught me about REWARDS.

'You are going to get it when you get home!'



18. She taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.

'If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way.'



19. She taught me ESP.

'Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?'



20. She taught me HUMOUR.

'When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me.'



21. She taught me HOW TO BECOME AN ADULT.

'If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up.'



22. She taught me GENETICS.

'You're just like your father.'



23. She taught me about my ROOTS.

'Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?'



24. She taught me WISDOM.

'When you get to be my age, you'll understand.'

25. And my favourite: She taught me about JUSTICE.

'One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!'

14:02 Feb 20 2009
Times Read: 704

The seven dwarfs go to the Vatican , and because they are the seven dwarfs, they are immediately ushered in to see the Pope.

Grumpy leads the pack.



'Grumpy, my son,' says the Pope, 'What can I do for you?'



Grumpy asks, 'Excuse me your Excellency, but are there any dwarf nuns in Rome ?'



The Pope wrinkles his brow at the odd question, thinks for a moment and answers, 'No, Grumpy, there are no dwarf nuns in Rome .'



In the background, a few of the dwarfs start giggling.



! Grumpy turns around and glares, silencing them.



Grumpy turns back, 'Your Worship, are there any dwarf nuns in all of Europe ?'



The Pope, puzzled now, again thinks for a moment and then answers, 'No, Grumpy, there are no dwarf nuns in Europe .



'This time, all of the other dwarfs burst into laughter.



Once again, Grumpy turns around and silences them with an angry glare.



Grumpy turns back and says, 'Mr. Pope! Are there ANY dwarf nuns anywhere in the world?'



The Pope, really confused by the questions says, 'I'm sorry, my son, there are no dwarf nuns anywhere in the world.'



The other dwarfs collapse into a heap, rolling and laughing, pounding the floor, tears rolling down their cheeks, as they begin chanting......



'Grumpy shagged a penguin!'



'Grumpy shagged a penguin!

10:43 Feb 19 2009
Times Read: 716

LITTLE RALPHY ON MATH (Part 1)



A teacher asks her class, 'If there are 5 birds sitting on a fence and you shoot one of them, how many will be left?'



She calls on little Ralphy.

He replies, 'None, they will all fly away with the first gunshot.'



The teacher replies, 'The correct answer is 4, but I like your thinking.'



Then little RALPHY says, 'I have a question for YOU.



There are 3 women sitting on a bench having ice cream:



One is delicately licking the sides of the triple scoop of ice cream.

The second is gobbling down the top and sucking the cone.



The third is biting off the top of the ice cream.

Which one is married?'



The teacher, blushing a great deal, replied, 'Well, I suppose the one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the cone.'



To which Little RALPHY replied, 'The correct answer is 'the one with the wedding ring on,' but I like your thinking.'





LITTLE RALPHY ON MATH (Part 2)



Little RALPHY returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic.



'Why?' asks the father?



'The teacher asked 'How much is 2x3,'' I said '6', replies RALPHY.



'But that's right!' says his dad.



'Yeah, but then she asked me 'How much is 3x2?''



'What's the fucken difference?' asks the father.



'That's what I said!' Replied RALPHY





LITTLE RALPHY ON ENGLISH



Little RALPHY goes to school, and the teacher says, 'Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?'



RALPHY says 'Mas-tur-bate.'



Miss Rogers smiles and says, 'Wow, little RALPHY, that's a mouthful.'



Little RALPHY says, 'No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob.'





LITTLE RALPHY ON GRAMMAR



Little RALPHY was sitting in class one day.

All of a sudden, he needed to go to the bathroom.

He yelled out, 'Miss Jones, I need to take a piss!!'



The teacher replied, 'Now, RALPHY, that is NOT the proper word to use in this situation.

The correct word you want to use is 'urinate.'

Please use the word 'ur-i-nate' in a sentence correctly, and I will allow you to go.'



Little RALPHY, thinks for a bit, and then says, 'You're an eight, but if you had bigger tits, you'd be a TEN!'





LITTLE RALPHY ON GRAMMAR (Part 2)



One day, during lessons on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show of hands from those who could use the word 'beautiful' in the same sentence twice.



First, she called on little Suzie, who responded with, 'My father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it.'



'Very good, Suzie,' replied the teacher. She then called on little Michael.



'My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully.'



She said, 'Excellent, Michael!' Then the teacher reluctantly called on little RALPHY........



'Last night at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was pregnant, and he said 'Beautiful, just fucken beautiful!''







LITTLE RALPHY ON GETTING OLDER



Little RALPHY was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar after another.

After the 6th one a man on the bench across from him said, 'Son, you know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, and make you fat.'



Little RALPHY replied, 'My grandfather lived to be 107 years old.'



The man asked, 'Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?'

Little RALPHY answered, 'No, he minded his own fucken business.



I LOVE Little RALPHY

10:40 Feb 19 2009
Times Read: 717

Posted this on the crossing of paths thread on main forum:



I believe that everyone enters our lives for a reason, some are just passing through it (the aquaintances and people you say hi to, even people in VR) others are here to teach us valuable lessons (either about the world we live in, our morals or just teach us somthing about ourself) some enter into our lives and well never leave them friends for life, family etc



Everyone we meet touches our lives in some way and that helps to shape us into the people we are, we learn lessons from the people, in somecases project oursleves onto that person, or take something from them and carry it with us.



Its definately got me thinking about all the pople who have come and gone through my life so far. Take a minute and think about it what has each person in your life taught you so far, what lesson have you learned from them (Yes even the hurtful and downright nasty people taught you something about yourself)

15:12 Feb 18 2009
Times Read: 728

Random thought for today:



Are vegitarians cruel? after all a cow can run away, have you ever seen a vegitable running?

21:53 Feb 17 2009
Times Read: 733

I decided to ask a css guru to help me with the code instead of stumble around like a lost something or other lol.



In the mean time i had great fun rewriting the text, and finding new music for my profile.

19:47 Feb 17 2009
Times Read: 739

So got round to upgrading back to prem today, and started playing around with my profile



* * * THIS PROFILE IS SUSPENDED AND CANNOT BE SEEN BY THE PUBLIC * * *





OOPS what have i done?

23:28 Feb 12 2009
Times Read: 742

Im almost at the end of my wick, my HR persons being a dick...



Takes a lot to push me to a point where im tempted to say "Fuck it" and walk away, i've jumped through all the hoops set for me and when i completed all the objectives and finished the hoops.



"Sorry you werent consistent in completing them it all came together at the last minute, yes you met the objectives but sod it here have a final formal warning anyway"



Its not over till the fat lady sings and this bitch is really annoying me, time to go pick a fight



"Walk softly and carry a big stick"



Things to do tomorow:



- Buy more Jack Daniels

- Look for a job

- Did i mention more jack :P

- pay my Vr subscription its depressing seeing a normal profile again