The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

I had the winter blues again this year and it was made so much worse by my having to spend two weeks in the hospital, after having emergency surgery, on my stomach, it was a scary thing that happened to me this past December, and then it was much worse when i had to spend two and a half months in a nursing home, for rehabilitation. I really hated that place, and being in there through Christmas and the New Year was so horribly depressing. I felt like i was missing some part of the holiday season being in there, it made me sad in the worst way. The night i went into surgery i feared i would die on that operating table, so i was truly scared for my life, and really wanted to live and i said to the surgeons that if i died in there that i would come back and haunt all their asses. I know now it sounds funny to say that but i had to do something, to keep from being scared as i was. Coming out of surgery and waking up with an oxygen mask on my face was also scary. I felt like i was fitted with Darth Vader's mask, i couldn't breathe, and i was trying to swat it off my face, like it was a huge parasite fused to my face, sort of like in the Alien movies. Another bad thing was that i could not eat at all, just looking at food made me want to be violently ill. In fact i ate very little while i was in the hospital, i did not like the food, it was nothing like homemade food. In the nursing home i couldn't really eat the food in there either, and it wasn't what i wanted to happen, but i did lose a great amount of weight, i went from being 142 to just a little under 112 pounds. It was because i wasn't eating very well in that place, which was truly a hellhole for me, and i did start to recover very slowly, after the therapists got me up on my feet to walk, and yes i did walk a little bit in the hospital with a walker, but after i got into the nursing home it was full steam ahead, and i walked everyday, and did some exercises with my arms as well as my legs. After two and a half months, i came home to stay. The day i left that place i was so happy and it didn't even bother me that i was taken home in a snowstorm, and i was still a little depressed, that winter seemed to drag on, is the reason for my having the winter blues. I'm lucky to have survived my ordeal, i'm a fighter and wanted to live, because i still had so much writing to do, especially on the comic book i'm still working on right now. I'll be working on it through the rest of this year and then after that i have a whole new story arc to work on that will probably take me another year to write. I love to write it gets me high, like my music also gets me high.