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I feel so crappy right now. It's really hot and humid out, and I woke up sick this morning. Unfortunately, I'm trying to shift all my crap to my new place. This is both a good and a sucky day at the same time.

Have you ever had one of those moments when you've thought, "Nah, that person isn't attracted to me like that.", the find out a little later that they really are? Sometimes, it's a shock when you learn you've underestimated yourself.

It was a long day. We were slammed for most of it. Then I had some b.s. with one person, and another person didn't realize they were supposed to work. GAH! It was stressful. I'm so glad I don't work tomorrow.



Hopefully, I should be moving into my new place tomorrow! I'm excited about that possibility.



I have no minutes left on my phone, but people are still texting me. I posted that on my fb page since the vast majority of the people who text me are on there, but it didn't seem to make a difference. *sigh* It's frustrating when I get a text but I have no way of knowing who it's from or what it's about.

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SinginGhost88
14:59 May 29 2011

Woops that was probably meeee sorry!!

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placidchaos
23:14 May 29 2011

lol, No worries. 'Sides, I'm sure they're not all from you. There are several sitting there that I can't open.

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I got to talk to my friend Rachael for a little bit this morning through texts. It was cool. I've been missing her. She only lives about 1 hour away, but that's 1 hour that I can't travel right now. Hopefully, I'll get to see her soon. She said she's missing me, so I'm hoping I can talk her into coming up to chill for my birthday if I don't get a chance to hit KC.

I was lying in bed trying to sleep around 2 a.m. last night when I got a text. Nobody really texts me that late, so I decided to check it just in case it was important. It was from somebody I'm acquainted with but don't really know. I talk to them often enough I guess. They're a clerk at a store I frequent. The thing is, I didn't give them my number. We do have a friend in common, and I guess they could have gotten it from her.



All the text said was, "Hey Jason! This is ___ from ___. I hope I don't wake you up..." I replied, but I haven't heard anything back. Strnage.

I haven't started moving into my new place yet. The people that were in it apparently left a note for the landlord yesterday to tell him they're out. He's going to be out of town until Sunday though, and that means I won't be able to get in until then at the earliest.



On the bright side... Not being able to move has helped me a bit. I picked up a couple of extra shifts for this week. To top that off, I found out last night that I got a raise! Hell yes! I don't know how much it is yet, but I'm happy to have it. Unfortunately, it won't show up on the paycheck I'll be getting in a few days since that payroll was already submitted, but it will be on the one at the end of June!

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dabbler
17:39 May 26 2011

congradulations

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I really wonder sometimes why dogs seem to like me so much. I can't tell you how many times I've had dogs that "don't let anyone but me pet them" act like I'm their best friend.



Just earlier today, I was petting this dog (it was some kind of hound, but I don't know what kind). It's not the first time I have, and it's always been really friendly. The owner came out while I was petting it, and they wigged out a little. Apparently, their dog is kind of mean to anyone but her and her kids. I'm scratching the dog's belly as she's telling me this, and it's little leg's just a twitchin'. Yesterday, I was out for a walk, and this pup comes running up to me. The owner was playing with it in the yard before I walked by. I stopped and pet it until the owner recalled it. I went to walk on, and I heard the owner yell for it as I'm walking into the street. I looked back to find it following me. I backed up so that the pup wasn't in the street, and the owner came to get it. When he tried to pull the pup away from me, it growled at him and tried to bite him.



This kind of thing hasn't been uncommon for me. I'd really love to know what it is that these dogs like about me.

It disturbs me just a bit to think people born at the end of the 90s are teenagers... Somehow, it just seems wrong.

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LadyXblackXRose
21:29 May 25 2011

wait till you get asked "in your day did they have......" and your not even in your 40s yet lol

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placidchaos
17:11 May 26 2011

Oh... I've had similar conversations, and I'm only 23.

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Sometimes I get tired of people asking me how I am or how things are going. I can only say the same thing so many times before I feel like ignoring people.

I was just sitting there watching Hancock earlier, and I was bored out of my mind. I started sorting through the crap on my end table and noticed my sewing needles. I started thinking about how I've been wanting more piercings. I grabbed one of the needles and started plaing with it. At first, I was just poking myself and seeing how hard I could do it before it actually hurt. When I noticed I had a bit of a tolerance to it, I decided to try actually pushing it in. When that worked, I went a bit further and pierced my arm. It felt really weird, but it didn't hurt. This gave me the courage to take it to the next step. I grabbed a new, clean needle and went to my bathroom mirror. Then I pierced my right ear. It didn't go as smoothly as I might have liked. It went into my skin just fine, but it was a pain in the ass trying to get it to go out the other side. I really had to put some force into it. However, I succeeded. My ear is now pierced.

*sigh* Moving was so much easier when the only things I had to worry about packing up were my clothes and computers. I'm stressing out a bit because the current tenant of the apartment I'm moving into is still in it, and I need to get my furniture out! It'll be a real pain in the ass if they wait for the very last day to go. It's not reasonable for me to shift my stuff from my current place to that one on the same day they're moving out and that I have to be out of where I'm at.

Bored and lonely... What a great day off...

What's right isn't always lega, and what's legal isn't always right. So where does the line get drawn? At what point do we stand up and hold firm to our values despite the law?

Do you know why I'm an anarchist? It's not necessarily because I want chaos. You see, none of the current systems work any better than anarchy would, and I would enjoy anarchy much more. It's that simple.

!!!!! I really hate it when I take a shot and somehow manage to get it up the back of my nose when I try to swallow! It's VERY unpleasant.

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vines
06:51 May 17 2011

i was curious so i got me a shot of Grand Marnier'

I dont see how you managed it either. lol.

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placidchaos
07:05 May 17 2011

Heh, I have no clue. I've done it a couple of times since I started driking. Once in a great while, it will go up my nose a bit from the back of my throat. It burns like hell.

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This will probably hit a nerve on some people, but...



I wonder just how many people know this. Modern Christianity is actually a fusion of Judaism and various Pagan religions.

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Army
04:57 May 17 2011

That's because in order to get people to convert the catholic church integrated other religious practices to make them feel more comfortable. This is not new.

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placidchaos
05:15 May 17 2011

True. However, even before that, it wasn't original.

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It's been a good day. I'm feelin' happy. Plus, I think it's going to be an alright night.



My friend Rachael came up and chilled with me, it was great. We mostly sat around watching Psych. When she left, she looked a little bummed and said she would miss me. It kind of made my day.

I feel like I might overflow soon.

It's only been a day since my friend went home, and it's not like she didn't go home every weekend since I met her, but I miss her a lot! This is different than her going home to visit. Now she's there until the new school year starts. On the bright side, she's coming up to visit me tomorrow! I'm so excited it's lame! Heh

I went to bed last night around 1ish, but I couldn't fall asleep. It was so ridiculous. I tried actually sleeping in my bed, then I moved to the couch, then I moved to my chair, and then I ended up back on my couch. I didn't manage to fall asleep until 5. I didn't stay asleep long though. I woke up at 6:48, and I couldn't get back to sleep again. To make things a little stranger, I feel decently rested.

I feel worthless. It's only because of how depressed I feel, but that doesn't help any at all.

I'm beginning to think I might just swear off sex. It's pointless. I just had the WORST sex I've ever experienced. It's not like I've ever had good sex either, so that's sayin' something. I wish I could have just one good experience, but I doubt it's going to happen.

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Isis101
03:40 May 10 2011

I agree...no sex is better than bad sex!

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I feel so good right now. I just went for a walk, and it was amazing. This is one of those nights when I don't want to stop walking. I'm working up a good sweat too. I had to stop in for a quick break, but I think I might head back out for a bit.

So... I know this is probalby going to sound pretty poserish all things considered, but... Whatever.



Recently, I've been craving blood. The craving has been especially strong today. When I think about it, the desire is akin to lust. I can't say there isn't a bit of sexual desire mixed in with it, but that's just a connection, not the source. I mean, it makes my mouth water the way thinking about an amazing meal while stoned and having been hungry most of the day would. It's strange.

It's so beautiful out right now... I think I need to go for a walk.

I was just looking at my pay stubs for the last couple of months. I didn't realize it until now, but my last two paychecks have been double what I was getting. I can't complain about that.

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Memoir
23:33 May 08 2011

that doesn't suck. i wish my paychecks would be double what i normally make hahaha

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Each time I get drunk, I'm a little more... I want to say 'lucid', but I'm not sure that's the right word. Anyway, the point is I'm adjusting to being drunk. It's not that I'm getting less drunk, I feel the affects the same, but there's a part of my mind that's separating itself from that better each time. I don't exactly know what that means, but it's interesting.

I don't knoww what I Was going to put here. I came here to twpe something bu I don[at remember whatrt.

I think I will miss you more when that time comes. None the less, I am so happy for you.

O.o... I checked the fluids on my car tonight, the last time I did was about 3-5 day ago. Apparently, the cap to my brake fluid has been off this whole time, but my brakes were working fine... I think reality forgot how to work.

Have you ever been around someone that you're completely out of sync with? It's really annoying.

When you ask somebody for their input on something, if you don't want to take their advice, don't keep asking them for further input! For cryin' out loud! Why are people so ridiculous?



This chic is hangin' with me tonight, and somebody she knows is wanting to chill. She doesn't really want him here though. Rather than giving him any kind of a firm no, she gives him a lie as an excuse. The problem with that is that she has to come up with a way to support it. When this first started, she asked me about it, and I said to just be honest with him. Then, when he tried to maneuver around her lie, she tried to get me to help her come up with something to counter it.



No. No. No. No. No. That doesn't work with me. I don't want to be a part of it. I said this, and she still tried to drag me into it. *sigh* FUCK!

I'm having one of those "try to stop me, see what happens" kind of moments. Nothing will stop me.

I just got home from my last class of the school year! Next week is finals week. I only have tests on Tues, Wed, and Thurs.



I'm both dreading and looking forward to the end of next week. I'll be able to work more after next week, but my best friend is going home until next semester. I've decided that this is going to be a good Summer though. I think this one is going to be different than any I've had before.

This is frustrating. I keep feeling lonely and thinking that I want a girlfriend. On the other hand, I'm not honestly sure I want a relationship right now. I'm a little hung up on someone, and I don't know how that would work with me dating someone. It's a major frustration.

I am SO tired of feeling like this!

Sometimes, angry is much better than sad or depressed.

I feel like I keep repeating the same shit over and over. It's getting on my nerves. Nothing seems to change though, so why would I have anything new to say?

I'm really super depressed right now. It sucks. There doesn't really seem to be a reason, I just am.

Well... I did a search to see if my idea is already patented, but I can't tell for sure. There's something that came up that might be the same thing. I can't tell by reading about it if it's different or not though.

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birra
20:27 May 02 2011

Then you next move, once you have the money, might be to consult a patent attorney.

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placidchaos
20:36 May 02 2011

For cryin' out loud. I've looked at a few patents on there, and I don't get why they don't just use plain language. I can't understand what they actually say.

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I have an idea for an invention, but I don't know what to do about it.

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DarkCrystal
19:33 May 02 2011

Firstly you would need money to build a prototype. Then you would need to get it patent for your invention. And more paper work...

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birra
20:03 May 02 2011

Well, first, search patents to see if anyone has already done it and/or what would make your idea different/better.



http://patft.uspto.gov/



If there is no patent out there for it, design it. I believe you can still patent a design without having a working prototype.

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How can my greatest source of joy be my greatest source of pain?

Why am I not the one?