Slain's Journal

Slain's Journal


Honor: 9    [ Give / Take ]


8 entries this month

Tough biker man show making me cry n shit

08:47 Nov 30 2023
Times Read: 139

"We're just... Better human beings when we're with the person we're supposed to be with.

I wasn't supposed to leave. I belong here"

Sons of Anarchy been kicking my ass. Goodness.




Do you enjoy the taste of blood?

09:51 Nov 29 2023
Times Read: 157

I have never been as big a fan of vampires, to willingly ignore the absolute ridiculous portrayal of the vampire bite.

It's as if you described to a twelve year old, pac-man with two evenly spaced teeth and told them to draw you what his bite would look like.

Do you know what a bite actually looks like sir? Have you ever in your life bitten your partner?

Because it does not look like that!!!!

Impressively enough... Not one single vampire show, or movie has moved away from this little trope.

The trope being, that no vampire ever, has ever had, a lower jaw.




14:45 Nov 29 2023

Well, I certainly wouldn't say they all stay so committed to that old 'trope'. But I know that most of them do. There are some out there, however, that actually take the reality into faint consideration.
I only know, because, naturally, I've seen a few of them.

I'm not exactly a big fan of most portrayals, myself, honestly. But that is partly because I've had no choice but to study it for years on end. Very few portrayals I've ever seen followed (or still follow) the reality of it, but they are there.

12:04 Nov 30 2023

I'd be very interested in seeing these versions. Lol


Saved? Definitely not. Taught? absolutely.

06:59 Nov 23 2023
Times Read: 186

"That's when she said
"I don't hate you boy
I just want to save you
While there's still something left to save"

Someone once said something very close to this. Which I see humorous now as they themselves were the lesson intended to save me. They had one foot out the door from day one, but it was- I was... too addicting to them and too willing for companionship. A fire engulfed us both and I suppose I cared far less than she about the burn. The resulting conflict became my fault, and thus I needed to learn how to be an accepting partner for them. Or see myself out. Ultimately I couldn't step down from my convictions, and the second foot took its route. Lol. Doorways and me have an interesting history. Or so I like to think.

The lesson?

If the beginning is tainted by even a single lie... walk away. If you find yourself compromising yourself, lying in order to retain anyone... perhaps it is not them you really have an interest in. No one ever learns this the easy way.

Hmm hmm. Never lie. You always feel it later, either through burden or absence. Even if you lie to yourself, you feel it. Even through your faux pride.





18:43 Nov 15 2023
Times Read: 212

When you ignore someone. Avoid them, for compromising reasons. Do you get upset or defensive when the person is upset at those choices? Basically deflect blame onto the person that had zero in influence on your choice other than being the one avoided.

No, this is not "social batteries" type of ignoring.

It's interesting. Because I deal just fine. But, now that I have to help my daughter literally navigate this behavior, from the people she trusted the most, it is extremely interesting that I dealt with this nearly my entire life, to more or less guide my daughter with nearly professional insight. Teaching her and suggesting soft, but boundary setting, "FUCK YOU"s. That are felt, with minimal dialogue and confrontation, as she's definitely not one for an argument.

I actually live being ignored daily, by my family, it's actually a hoot.

Slightly strong coincidence... in the scope of the universe. Lol.

I don't know how they are under the impression that the life block button is disabled when it comes to them. My standards aren't that high. But here we are. Lol.

And my Littlefoot?

She's turning into me... While I'm not there for her. Something, although amusing when considering her cunt mother, is actually breaking my heart.




The broken hearts

15:25 Nov 14 2023
Times Read: 230

It's creeping up, that time where friends you appreciate and the those you've lost cross your mind just a smidge more often. Silence is non conducive. Remember that.




Baking, temporarily suspended. Hah

23:25 Nov 13 2023
Times Read: 246

Oven doors have been getting stuck open for months. I've closed them numerous times. This time however... I used... A tenth of my strength? and wouldn't you know it? The oven door exploded into shards in my hands, and I'm here to tell ya... it's my fault.

Like... It's starting to kinda rain. Heh.... I'm giggling at how that shit exploded in my hands, but I'm seething with peripheral anger. I'm cackling. 😢🥲🤣🤦🤌



02:21 Nov 14 2023

Trust me, brother, I know how that goes. The number of times I have had something break on me, when it really shouldn't have is ridiculous, to say the least.
It was especially common, for me, when I was working as an appliance repair technician & assist.


I only eat sugar, from the northern 2d islands like my strict carb free diet says I should

22:55 Nov 12 2023
Times Read: 275

Is it normal to self-brainwash, when one chooses or just happens to be a part of any group or community, into thinking said niche is so infallible, that any digs and meantions of isolated realities related to said identity group, can only be and should only be regarded as direct and malicious disparaging of the group and any of it's members?

Seriously... (Painfully trite and obvious examples) If it doesn't look good on Cops, or Soldiers, why would it look good to have a party line anywhere else? Every group has it's bad apples, stupid apples and retarded apples. It must feel personally satisfying to delude oneself into thinking a particular community has no flawed individuals at all.

I'm part of the human group. I identify as human. So don't you fucking dare make fun or point out any one in my human group for doing the stupid or saying Obliviously stupid shit. I will hate all of you from now on. Grr.

It's wild. And, it's honestly kinda freeing. I haven't chosen a group to identify with, with such fervor and blind conviction, but if I could... Rest assured, it will be the bestest group, in all the bestest groups, evah!




You can... take the sky... from me

18:59 Nov 07 2023
Times Read: 290

I'm watching Firefly once again. Must be that time of year to "torchure" myself. :: Smirks defeatedly::



00:45 Nov 09 2023

I love that show, movie.

08:51 Nov 10 2023

It is a damn good series, for sure.

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