I went out last night with an old friend. I went out with her twenty years ago....so it was a shock for me to see that she hasn't aged much.
It's funny how the subject changed to magic and vampires after about an hour of just catching up with lost time. She was very covert at matching and mirroring movements of mine, which I wouldn't have noticed if I didn't know what to look for. She was watching me very closely, and she was directing and controlling the conversation very well. Only for a split second did I feel unease at something which she said. But in a flash it was over as quick as it had come.
The invitation to go around to her flat came as a shock to me but I thought why not. So we left, and I drove. Because I was driving I hadn't been drinking so I didn't understand why I felt tired when we arrived at the flat.
Once inside we chatted some more about magic and the protection that can be used against psychic attack. And of how a bubble is my choice. I told her that I don't believe in black or white magic but I do believe in positive and negative energy. The more I spoke the more I felt tired, and I had a very hard time at trying to keep my eyes open. Then I became confused and light headed. Twice I thought that her eyes looked black and glistening but I put it down to low light. Now Iam not so sure.
I had only been in her flat for around an hour and a half when I decided to make my excuses and leave. While she was giving me a hug goodnight and thanking me for meeting with her, she took two deep breaths. Once on the right cheek, then on the left cheek, my legs shook from her grip and felt leaden.
The oddest thing happened, I walked back to the car which was parked one hundred meters away and puked up right by the car. Once inside I actually felt safe and couldn't wait to get home. When I stepped through the front door I felt really faint and just about made it to my bed. I led there and knew it was not possible for me to get up and clean my teeth. All I wanted to do was close my eyes and laugh. Laugh because she had bloody drunk my energy, and because I hadn't realised until it was to late that she was doing it.
I want to me her again, challenge on.
Time now for me to call upon all my strength as it has started again.
Pain is horrid and horrid is pain....I will walk again and hold my head high. I will not/cannot suffer this torment ANYMORE
Hearing that music in the background again feeling something...I only hope that it comes to me soon and...............
Don't run away....
Most people will shy away from a bad dream because they have no control over it.
So how do you control it?...Recognition.
Another way to use recognition are repetitive dreams...
Ok Your having that dream again so*bang*YOU know that your having a dream that youv'e had before...recognition in your dream. Try to change it..you can do it. BECAUSE AT THAT POINT YOU KNOW THAT YOUR DREAMING!
lol, don't allow yourself to wake up. The more you can control what happens in the dream the longer you can stay in it.
Don't run away...embrace what you fear most...
Open that door, or walk up/down those stairs where you know something is lurking. The hardest thing will be to slow down the dream.....don't allow the dream to control you, you control what you are in it, remember this.
This works for me, and is very simple to do.
After all, you can be what you want in your dreams!
Written at 0200hrs
The eternal fight within causes me to grow weary of all that is, and all that should be......
As I fall from my darkness....(Feels like going over a hump back bridge at speed so that my stomach ends up in my mouth.....)
I have entered that state again...I know that I am dreaming...(how?)
It's hard to explain, sometimes Ill see a light ....a flashing light or lightning...Other times I will Just know that I am dreaming.
When you get to the stage that you know that it is a dream....and we ALL get to this stage...then you just think of what you want of your dream.
Falling dream. Very powerful draw to go close to the edge of a great height, and look over.
Ok you know in the dream that you shouldn't go to the edge...but you do and you fall and fall.
As soon as YOU KNOW not to go to the edge but that urge over weighs the danger this is recognition of dreaming. You, at that point have the power to change the dream. In most cases you can't stop going to the edge so when you go over the edge (you now know that your in a dream) so change what the out come should be (FLY)
The other option is to hit the bottom...if you dare lol....it's difficult for someone to do, but when you know how, it will not hurt you.(well not in the sense that we understand) I have done it a few times but it's against my nature to enjoy the hit. In most cases you will come out of the dream before you hit the bottom or you will fly. (It takes great control to hit the bottom.) This is because it goes against the flight or fight response which we all have. Your mind knows that you have options the bottom is the last one!
I am alone waiting for some form of terror that is coming.....I know that it is coming for me....
I stand my ground and wait. It is almost upon me. I know what to do because that feeling is there again...it is a dream. I summon my power, in a second I am in the air flying. We fight...I become joined with it, I become IT.......I destroy everything in my path...I feel nothing.
Changing a dream...if you can fly you have control...you can be what you wish...good or bad.
Just about to start Reiki, only a couple of days and It will be over....What if that's not the one. That will mean more money spent in the quest for .....what ever it is that Iam searching for...
Everyone feels that they need something in their life (Metaphoric violation) Really I do!
What ever it is has evaded me for most of my years, but I know now that it is getting close...Iam on the path!
I feel that soon It will unfold, and my understanding of it will then follow.
In a forest with trees, a fire is burning. Many people are around and dancing some are chanting......I am one of them chanting, wearing a red robe.
My skin looks dark and my hair is thick and matted....I can smell the fire and taste the food Iam eating. I feel great peace........................
Image fades and I come back home
He clasps the crag with crookèd hands;
Close to the sun in lonely lands,
Ring'd with the azure world, he stands.
The wrinkled sea beneath him crawls;
He watches from his mountain walls,
And like a thunderbolt he falls...
Dam wheres the brakes...
Oh this is not my work!
If the succubi drain you of your life force, then why is it mine is in love with me in my dreams. I am in love with.....well what ever it is as well. She has started to come into my dreams and my astral field of vision
But I know that it is just a dream, just a woman in a dream. The smell of her, the taste of her, the touch...everything about her drives me insane....in my dreams of her. When we make love it is sometimes for an age and other times quick. She always wants more from me but I always leave her because at that point I wake up. If I fall asleep again and dream of her again we make love again....
I have begged her to come into my world, to allow me to stay in her world longer. In the dreams I cry tears of blood for her.
When I awake I do feel tired but not drained of energy as people suggest you should feel.
As I have great control over my dreams, and I can be and do 99.9% of what I want in them. My recal is also very good and I have a book of shadows to write about her in it so that nothing is missed.
Dam it this woman has told me she wants me forever, remembering that I have a partner already I wonder if I could swap.......
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