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Joli's Journal

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5 entries this month
 

Really fun VR conversation with Saint. He's curious, but he makes me think. Remember to read from bottom to top!

00:35 Dec 14 2006
Times Read: 1,470


Dec 13 2006 LiquidSaint wrote:



But when your as good as cornchips I just can't help it ;)



Dec 13 2006 Joli wrote:

Don't gobble me up all at once like a bag of cornchips.



Dec 13 2006 LiquidSaint wrote:



That's beautiful.You don't take things for granted.Which is amazing, because far too many people do these days.





Dec 13 2006 Joli wrote:



This is a hard one because I've had a helluva full life with many bright spots. The high-water mark isn't a happy one by most standards, but it was the best, most privileged moment of my life. I was present when my grandfather died. He was the dearest thing to me that ever drew a breath on this earth...he was there when I drew my first and I was present when he drew his last. It was meaningful, quiet, and the details privately treasured in my heart.



That was an amazing question. Thank you for asking...it helped me.



Dec 13 2006 LiquidSaint wrote:



Best experience in life so far?



I appreciate you being as open as you have so far.It's nice getting to know someone I feel a good connection with.



Dec 13 2006 Joli wrote:



I am passionate about finding joy in life...not just self-serving pleasures, but real eye-opening joys that make you proud to walk this planet. I am passionate about choice...about both having choice as often as possible and in exercising it where you do. It's so easy to get jaded. I fucking refuse. When I lie down at night, it will be with gratitude.



I love my bike...riding is freedom.

I love words...they are one way to express who I am.

I love making someone just crack the hell up.

I love pain coupled with trust and the hint of doubt in the eyes of the one I want.

I love taking and giving breath.

I love men with tattoos.

I love a deep, clean, cold breath of air.

I love the way the scent of gardenias floats on an August breeze, the hint of the river still there.

I love the way my dog looks at me.



Dec 13 2006 LiquidSaint wrote:



Damn you and your riddles! I should have known this would be tricky with someone who knows how to use words so cleverly. :P=



So what are your passions in life? What do you live for?



Dec 13 2006 Joli wrote:



I didn't avoid it. I answered it as honestly as I could and left it up to you to interpret. I'm not going to separate this from your next question because I think it applies to both:



A man knocked on the door of an Amish farmer. He explained that he was taking a poll and asked, "Are you a Christian?"



The farmer replied, "Ask my neighbors if I am a Christian, for in their answers will the truth lie."



I believe there is more than just myself. I try to live as though my life matters and my behaviors will speak about who I am and what I held dear while I was here. I try to weigh heavier in what I hold as "good."



Dec 13 2006 LiquidSaint wrote:



You avoided my first question, but I may have asked it in the wrong way.For now I'll take your answer as a yes to what I was trying to ask lol.



And I know the feeling you've described.I just don't hold to hope that it will ever go away.And thank you ;)



Moving on..I know I shouldn't ask this one, because it's one of the few things Im extremely private about but where do you stand religiously?



Dec 13 2006 Joli wrote:



You'll likely never hear me say that I am a vampire.



There is a mind out there looking for mine...I can feel it. I will know it when I find it. When I dream sometimes, I feel an intense pull in my chest, almost like anxiety because we need so desperately to find each other. I can't prove that, but I believe it...and even if I'm wrong, it's ok. I meet standouts like yourself.



You aren't being nosey; I invited you to ask.



Dec 13 2006 LiquidSaint wrote:



Do you consider yourself a vampire? Or just have an interest in them?



And would you mind elaborating on this "someone"?



I don't mean to be nosey, Im just curious about you.



Dec 13 2006 Joli wrote:



I have insatiable lusts, have been part of the "vampire community" since you were learning to use the big potty, and I'm in search of someone (don't read the last one as a lonely heart/dating thing).



Dec 13 2006 LiquidSaint wrote:



Your not allowed to be private, heh.Atleast not with me :P



First question I have is this: Why are you here?



Dec 13 2006 Joli wrote:



What would you know? And know beforehand that I have tendencies toward being intensely private. Ask any questions you like and I'll be as honest as I can.



Dec 13 2006 LiquidSaint wrote:



You could tell me a little bit more about yourself.I think I've just barely scratched the surface.



Dec 13 2006 Joli wrote:



Sorry, heart..what shall we talk about?



Dec 13 2006 LiquidSaint wrote:



Stop being so quiet over there! :)


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Why do you care so desperately that I understand that you don't care?

05:55 Dec 13 2006
Times Read: 1,474



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Just...wow. You can't make up this kind of crazy.

08:43 Dec 08 2006
Times Read: 1,491


VAMPARIAH

Re: Vampire fact vs. fictionPosted: 19:06:16 - Dec 07 2006Times viewed: 36Yeah Mikhail for being a Vampire for only 6 months you do pretty good, the sparring you and I had done in the Spring and summer made me pull my hair out. Think what you will be like after a decade of vampirism?I have to myself believed that the first Vampire was Jewish and the whole of the Monotheistic God and the Old Testament arose over that.I think there are more Jews running around with the male brain, which is why they are so shrewd, and the Nazis had to do what they did to them, the MASter race was outfoxed.The male brain can be quite crafty and you see the first sinners are the ones to realize the whole nephilim scenario, fallen angels, and then to preserve that male brain. But I think at this point it is moe of the soul, anyone can have hemispeheres but the thing that lies ontop of the brains is the thing that might be dissipating.I know this is highly contraversial, but fallen angels and the devil are things in the bible, and it was written by the Jews, so maybe in theory the first vampires were Jewish?I dunno, it is just a thought I was keeping to myself.



FELIXFELIX:

Re: Vampire fact vs. fictionPosted: 19:12:53 - Dec 07 2006Times viewed: 34Vampariah - there are so many moral land mines in your theory that I'm actually a little frightened to take that on. I tend to get just a little skittish when theories start to include Nazi motivations the 'Jewish brain' being different than others. However, if a mythological vampire can create the hypnotic effect of no pain (as told in the folklore and fiction) then drinking human blood would be kosher? Again I think I may have opened a can of worms.Perhaps it's best that we scuttle both of those thoughts/diversions and return to the ideas originally put forward.



VAMPARIAH:

Well the Jews did go to Iraq. The whole babylonian captivity, this would mesh with uber's philosophy? That seems what the thread is centered around, going back to the beginning.I do not include details that do not have merit. The Jews may have learned from the story of Uber's peoples and that is how it got into their bible.If they did learn from the land of Ur, that might be the reason why the Jews are so smart, and they are smart, there is no argument agianst that. They own all of Hollywood and like I said in the thread Hollywood is the new religion, not the ATM as some comic stated. Chris Rock.



ARASHI281:

Re: Vampire fact vs. fictionPosted: 00:28:13 - Dec 08 2006Times viewed: 18Respect and graciousness will take a person, demon, vampire, or Lycan farther than being harsh or abrasive. As for the sunlight, ask a Vampire in the Lone Star state.



VAMPARIAH:

VAMPIRE RATPosted: 01:21:18 - Dec 08 2006Times viewed: 11well, there are alot of women singing that famous country western song WHERE HAVE ALL THE COWBOYS GONEkeeping secrets under 10 gallon hats has devestated not only the Lone Star State, but also all of America and Europe. The other countries seem to be with the program, they have less fear of the truth with their masculinity not in question.It can be a vampire planet. There are not enough watchers, and guardians, I am just a vampire rat.



JOLI:

Re: Vampire fact vs. fictionPosted: 03:25:07 - Dec 08 2006Times viewed: 2Just a quick little insert, if you'll indulge me. I'd hate the "kosher" question to get away from us. It doesn't refer at all to animals being slaughtered without pain...it's ritual slaughter that severs the jugular vein, carotid artery, esophagus and trachea in a single cut with a smooth, sharp knife until the animal bleeds out. It can be quite painful. But "kosher" refers to more than just slaughter...it's a pretty hefty set of rules that deems whether an animal is fit for human consumption, so by design, a human cannot be kosher. As to the nazi/jewish theory, I'm just stunned. I'm so stunned that I'm going to go look up new adjectives that mean stunned because stunned just isn't cutting it.


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archive 2 - not interesting unless you're me.

04:48 Dec 06 2006
Times Read: 1,500




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Re: metaphors on energy and magic

Posted: 09:23:09 - Dec 05 2006

Times viewed: 36



dragonmaster, yes it's very possible. When you're ready, I'd love to help supply you with the metaphor in the particular.



Vampariah, you turned a well-known saying that means "We're basically agreed, let's not quibble over insignificant details" into semantics. (Incidentally, please picture me smiling when you read that because its intent was levity, not to mock.)



I also liked the question about what the one thing might be that you'd use magic to accomplish, but likely that's another thread. This one is the metaphor...what that feeling of magic is most like in description. Your suggestion, Vampariah, of the snowball in hell is very descriptive and certainly gives us a clear idea of how you feel about the matter.



I find it interesting that so many claim to actually, visually see the magic. I have a fair familiarity with the capability of the human brain to accomplish things we can't always comprehend, but even within the extreme margins of what our limbs and organs are capable of, some things just don't happen.



Legs, for example, tend to do leg-like things...even when standing in for missing arms. Legs don't suddenly become noses. How is it that the human eye, so VERY easy to study that we can correct vision in infants who cannot yet answer "better now...worse...better," that we aren't studying this ability to ACTUALLY see magic or energy. You people really need to volunteer for some research so us schmoes can have a clue!



If you're actually seeing it, you don't have a need for the ol' metaphor, but I'm grateful that you shared with the rest of us.



I must have gotten the Great Designer's surplus parts...to use a metaphor *wink*







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Re: metaphors on energy and magic

Posted: 18:19:58 - Dec 05 2006

Times viewed: 17



Yes, Joli, I understand, there is nothing wrong with being the exceptional woman. There are all kinds of stages of humans with all kinds of abilities. Just be put on notice that you are most rare, and it shows from the way that you post. There was a vampire assassin here the other night, come to make me dethrone in my heart the woman I was placing in it, with the aspect that in the freshest memory, a mistress is going to be an eventuality, as no one woman is going to have everything and sometimes the one you get with is because they are the only one whom will give you their all.



Yes Daermon, the enrgy of magic must be collected for use at the proper time, to be utilized when deemed necessary by the higher order, not by us.



I see you have dodged the question about what you plan to do with magic because you are like the great men whom time calls upon them to save their civilization, but not before the call from the powers that be demand it.



I was under the suspicion that you were hoarding magic for use as evil, but I see your purpose is as of mine, to understand evil or things taboo and misunderstood, for use for the greater good.



I consider the matter to be over.







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Re: metaphors on energy and magic

Posted: 18:29:07 - Dec 05 2006

Times viewed: 15



Actually, I was poking fun at myself...think "army surplus" and leftovers.







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Re: metaphors on energy and magic

Posted: 19:09:36 - Dec 05 2006

Times viewed: 10



Don't cut yourself short Joli, I have admired the way you post for the longest, you could not be so composed a person if you did not have some exceptionality.





Snowball chance in hell?



What do you find so magical about that metaphor?



I just threw that in in the last moment to wow the populace. Sometimes I just make stuff up just to sound important. Daermon is right about me, I am a fraud and my intellect is a cover up for a dirty mind.

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archive - don't read...uninteresting to anyone but me

04:22 Dec 06 2006
Times Read: 1,518


Re: Porphyria's Lover.

Posted: 20:49:01 - Dec 04 2006

Times viewed: 110

Joli



Porphyria: is derived from the Greek word πορφυρος, meaning purple. The related word porphyry is often used by poets to mean a very beautiful purple stone similar to marble. In the late nineteenth and early twentieth centuries, medical researchers identified a condition that is generally called Porphyria, a common manifestation of which is Acute Intermittent Porphyria: it is sometimes characterized by mental confusion, hallucinations, and extreme sensitivity to light.



Browning published the poem in 1836, at least 40 years before a doctor named the disease that Browning would simply have known as blood/liver disease.



Interpreting literature makes me as geekygiddy as a grad student because when a good author publishes (and Mr. Browning was no schlepp,) only half of the puzzle is done. It takes the reader to bring to the words new experience and imaginings to insure that the literature will live on.



I have my own ideas about this work, but Porphyria a vampire? Ok, sure...why not? It's as fun an interpretation as any other!



FOOT NOTES

Posted: 08:10:08 - Dec 05 2006

Times viewed: 86

VAMPARIAH



I never took Master's Degree in Literature, but I did take a level 600 class that I had to get clearance for.



Joli's interpretation is as valid as any and even more so. When the facts are examined, then the way to go about figuring out what authors intended in the works is done through a process known as EXPLICATION.



There is no one way to interpret a piece of writing. Any analysis must be supported however. Footnotes are never put on a piece of work until it is in its published form. So even then the interpretation of the poem is done by someone else than the author.



I have a collection with this poem in it, and I will go examine the footnotes.



If a case can be substantiated then the interpretation is freasible.



large written arguments (explications) are the process whereby a final interpretation of a work of literature is supported.



I do however have always not believed the experts. I think you can believe what ever you want to believe, or come away from the work with any different grain of understanding than anybody else, just in order for what you feel to be real about it, then the evidence has to point your way.



But it is not about who is right, or even supporting a case. If after reading the poem, you are sure about her purple hue, white skin, red hair, and lecherous tendencies, as well as seductive qualities, and this would lead you to think she was a modern day vampire, then the experts can go to rot. People's opinions about art/life are sacred.







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Re: Porphyria's Lover.

Posted: 08:47:59 - Dec 05 2006

Times viewed: 83



Murmuring how she loved me—she

Too weak, for all her heart's endeavour,

To set its struggling passion free

From pride, and vainer ties dissever,

And give herself to me for ever. 25

But passion sometimes would prevail,

Nor could to-night's gay feast restrain

A sudden thought of one so pale

For love of her, and all in vain:





I think these verses can give us some valuable clues:

The speaker finds her too weak to free her passion from what? Pride. And to do what? To “cut” vainer ties and give herself to him forever. He even says that is her heart’s endeavor. She just can't seem to pull it off! He further states that sometimes passion does prevail. So…there’s definitely some whoopee between them.



Her familiarity with this home and hearth so evident when she comes in and these verses suggest an affair. There is something about him or their union that makes her afraid to formally be his girl. Possibly he is of a lower class or she may already be married.



Further, I think HE is the pale one…look at the punctuation “one so pale for love of her, and all in vain.” He’s suffering for want of her, knowing she ain't gonna come through for him in the end. We know that SHE is rosy with laughing blue eyes.



I think he waits for that moment when passion and love are clearly in her eyes and makes the decision for both of them. He says, “that moment she was mine, mine, fair perfectly pure and good.” Later he states that there is no stain in her eyes. Since he knows she will not choose him, and will walk out the door again to go back to her vainer pursuits, he picks the moment of her clearest expression of affection for him and acts for them both.



No supernatural explanations are necessary…just an author with a pen and a love of seeing how far he can take Victorian romance.









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NORTON ANTHOLOGY NOTES

Posted: 13:45:54 - Dec 05 2006

Times viewed: 78



The notes I am working from come from a lectrure in 1985-1986 English Lit college coursework.





The professor asserts that it is about necrophilia, abnormal psychology, it is possible she is a married woman, he writes about himself in the third person, begs the question why did she not divorce? suggesting Schitzophrenia.



To analyze the poem and to come to our own conclusions we must understand the writer from his biographies. He was a very misunderstood writer and the earlier biographies did not address his real nature.



First off when he was 21 and he got his first poem published he did the classic mistake all young writers make, they write through the use of their own voice. When the critique of his poem came back he dropped the 3rd person and began to do research on other peoples misfortunes like the way a paparazzi might chance car crashes on the short wave.



He had found man's inhumanity to man, and he studied it fervently all his life. He renounced god early in life, in his teens, and then he came to the conclusion that life was but a test, and the presence of the perfection of heaven balanced the evil in this world.



Still however he felt the need to make this life a better place, which might have been part of the test.



He was nobody. He married Elizabeth Barrett Browning w3ho at the time was a semi-invalid, and through the power of his love of her, she was resurrected from an early death. He did outlive her 28 years, and didn't skip a beat.



Elizabeth Browning was his maker, obviously. She was the most heralded poet of her time at a time when all writer's even the female ones had to take male names to be read.



Obviously, Elizabeth's evil father had an impact on her, and she came to understand the evil in him and it's effects on her to the degree that she came face to face with loss of herself in the physical plane.



In order to take your demons to heart that they almost kill you, and then to be resurrected by love is probably why she did not have to take a male name, and people would listen to anyone with courage to live on in unfortunate forms.



She gave him a child, that is hows healthy she got from his love, and they lived in Italy for 16 years which the countryside of aids poetry.



Robert Broiwning used the device of the mask, to have other people speak his concerns and what social injustices, or interfamiliar injustices he wanted to get rid of.



I think Porphyria was indeed a vampire. I think Elizabeth Barrett Browning was one and the same. She had been the one to become semi-invalidic through the internalization of the demon to conquor the demon, and it almost killed her. Fortunately Robert Browning desired Immortality, otherwise he would have kept on writing in the first person, so he spent his life maintaining a woman who had turned to the occult to write so heavenly with the power of a forked tongue. Resurrecting her made him immortal. Whenst with the opposite gender, it may not be perfect love, and although his wishes for good health may have been only to achieve his immortality, when with the female a certain real love occurs, even if his motives were not pure.



Browning's battles between good and evil, of faith, of Immortal Love, his dive into the darkness and disturbed nature of life, made him an odd writer.



William Butler Yeats at his burial in Westminster Abbey (only the greatest get buried there) said:



"none of the odd ones have been so great and none of the great so odd."



He changed writing in his day, although he did make some compromise to get read. I am sure he came to love crippled Elizabeth, and because of that he was able to love her when she was resurrected, in a fashion as only immortal lovers can.



There have been movies made on the relationship between Elizabeth and Robert. One in recent times.



He was nothing, and her making him understanding the vampirism in her that made her the greatest poet of her time, brought him immortality as well.



The fact that this poem in my poetry anthology was the first listed, has some significance. It was a mask between her and him, in different forms.



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Re: Porphyria's Lover.

Posted: 18:17:52 - Dec 05 2006

Times viewed: 50



It's not written in third person, but first.







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Re: Porphyria's Lover.

Posted: 18:22:49 - Dec 05 2006

Times viewed: 47



And just for clarification...you believe Elizabeth Barrett Browning was a vampire and that Robert was her donor...that he sustained her, and she gave him immortality and basically taught him to be the writer he became? Please tell me if I understood that correctly, Vampariah.







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defending explications

Posted: 18:46:17 - Dec 05 2006

Times viewed: 44



Actually Joli you contradict yourself.





"Further, I think HE is the pale one…look at the punctuation “one so pale for love of her, and all in vain.” He’s suffering for want of her, knowing she ain't gonna come through for him in the end. We know that SHE is rosy with laughing blue eyes."





That is the full stanza in your words. If he is the pale one, that particular line the professor 20 years ago stressed that the "one so pale" was him, I have the notes in the column (line 28 was "himself in the 3rd person").



And now you also disagree or either ask me to support that he was her donor? Well he gave her life, if not blood, sometimes vampires only need attention to rise from the grave, but



Since my explication has been determined from the nature of their biographical evidence, that he resurrected her, and he had been the one to shift from writing in the 1st person to the 3rd person, and the mask device,



I really do support my explication that the writers and the lovers are the same. In life Joli I have found that the strangulation issue in the poem here, is this...



sometimes when you live with someone marriage becomes abysmal because of the lack of freedom and the stagnation of being happy, it dulls the senses. People must be hungry to achieve, and marriage sometimes has a teat full that the cup overfloweth with, and instead of bringing life, marriages sometimes kill people. I personally was keeping these ideas to myself, that their union is what killed her, it resuerrects on one hand and destroys on the other. I didn't not want people to be dissuaded from marrying each other, as we are all led to believe this is what life is about. I think however, that Robert knew, or realized that he was killing the one whom made him immortal, and he asks why did she not get a divorce? As the professor made me jot down in the margin last cenntury.



As you know Joli, there are subcategories of critics critiques offering various explications and interpretations of books and even poetry. I have thumbed through some of the genre, but I find those kinds of writers to be "stuffy" and if you want out of this argument on dotting eyes and crossing T's, I would be happy.



But I think you now see the validity, that since the word vampire, or the modern concept of it arose after the time this poem was written, and Elizabeth Barrett Browning had writing powers "some would consider unnatural", that these two personages were grappling with a most misunderstood thing at the time. This is why Hollywood has their microscope upon them throughout the decades.



The other thing that I let slide Joli, since you are exceptional for your right brain, and you primarily use the left for jurisprudence executive function and some details might get lost in your handle on everything, the Victorian age I believe, although I never studied the period, was a 50 year thing, and since Queen Victoria died in 1900, this poem was predating the Victorian Era, even though it was written in it's style because the manner in which he wrote it rang in a new age.



I am sure withstanding being corrected is one of your many talents, and you do not mind me correcting you for the benefit of others interpretations of history.







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Re: Porphyria's Lover.

Posted: 18:51:10 - Dec 05 2006

Times viewed: 42



"let slide" meant that I was considering correcting your statement before, but decided against it.







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Re: Porphyria's Lover.

Posted: 19:49:46 - Dec 05 2006

Times viewed: 31



I am such an idiot for responding to this and the sad thing is I know it, but here I am, doing it anyway. Please not that it is done in good humor and in the spirit of debate.



Vampariah,



I didn’t contradict myself…he writes in the first person. Look at all the pronouns; I’m not making this up. Yes, he refers to himself, but still…first person. Kinda like, “I wonder why this girl who generally knows better is still writing these words.”



Next, I neither agree nor disagree with you. I asked for clarification. I might suggest that he nursed or inspired her back to health could be another way of interpreting it. Yours may be fact…I have no way of knowing.



Next, please stop saying what I am and what I am not. For the purposes of the forum, I’m just somebody with an opinion. I know you’re often complimentary, but something about the way you stuff people quickly into categories is kinda creepy.



Last, the Victorian era is not air tight and if you want the point, ok, you got it…historians typically set it at 1837 to 1914. Porphyria dates in a year early at 1836. By all accountings, Browning is a Victorian writer, but ok. No need to let me slide.









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Re: Porphyria's Lover.

Posted: 22:19:07 - Dec 05 2006

Times viewed: 21



yes the male character is in the first person, but it is a device by Browning to voice elements of his own life. So even if it is in the first person, still it is him speaking through a mask.



The Victorian age began with the death of Queen Elizabeth's husband. Whatever year that was, I do not know.



You'd think creepy would be good on a dark site like this, or evil.



You are the one whom is studying both literature right now and the Victorian Age, I concede on both points.


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