22:31 Mar 24 2009
Times Read: 771
It's so easy to complain. About anything, VR included. And you'll always have people agree with you...and spectators. We're not so far removed from the Roman Coliseum, after all. Still fun to watch folks fighting lions with cardboard armor.
It's the rarest of rare occasions that I'll go there. Why not? I'm perfectly capable of twisting a phrase and making someone feel idiotic. I've even been trusted with different levels of authority I could abuse. Is it the pursuit of something nobler? Is it a fearful nature? (Worrying someone might not like me if I were mean.)
Nah...it's unsatisfying, that's why. It takes energy to maintain that sort of demeanor. Potshots and criticism usually leave me feeling like I've cheapened myself. I'll occasionally play back with misguided people, but even that's rare.
I laugh. I love. I create. I fail. I triumph. I do all of them quietly, and even on a grand scale at times...especially the failures! I write about those things and some people read and some people steer clear. Would you believe that in all my time spent here, there's only been one person I can truly say that I disliked. Actively disliked. And even that person didn't occupy much of my thoughts. Again, it takes energy to dislike people.
I prefer to notice. I notice the good, the bad, and the ugly. Hell, sometimes I'm all three. So why am I writing this rambly thing? It's not very like me to do so...I'm disappointed, that's why. I realized that recently when I had a few minutes to check into journals, my favorite places on VR. I'm disappointed that some of the brightest among us seem trapped. They cannot stop calling attention to the negativity around them. It has become a part of their identity.
I love to see people, REALLY see them. I respond to people who tell you that sometimes they feel like they suck...and why. People who are wise enough to know they are on a journey and that they want to grow along the way. I want to share joys, loves, hurts, exalted moments, creativity, and the profound threads that weave around and through our lives. That's a life story...a journal.
I know...I know. It's a website. People are at different places and want to share different things. They are free to do that in any way they like. I have even defended and enforced that right here on VR...I have bruised it in necessity, too. My question is...how relevant to your life is the slight that someone here gave you? REALLY? A poor rating, a snub, a blinding, a deleted post. Is it worth the time and space to rail about them?
I want to know what you thought about today and who you want to be tomorrow. YOU, not them. Why do you hurt and what lights you up? Who inspires you to be better? What disappoints you in yourself?
How many "tough guy" entries have I read in journals where threats and "fuck yous" have been the prominent theme? That's telling us about you, but probably not the story you truly WANT us to know.
COMMENTS
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imagesinwords
22:44 Mar 24 2009
I totally hear you.
Probably up to last year or so I used my journal in ways I shouldn't have... I changed it, I grew, and a few months ago- I even went back through all over 2000 of my entries and deleted every one of them that sickened me due to its motivation.
Besides, I'm just better than that. And even the people I don't care for are better than that. Rather I like it or not :P
FallenPixie
22:54 Mar 24 2009
Very well said. Sometimes I find myself 'guilty' of the lower portrayals, but, hopefully, my more 'intelligent' entries show more and more of who I am. :)
Ockham
23:52 Mar 24 2009
But... ragespiration is the best 'spiration :(
Theban
10:13 May 01 2009
Your words mean a lot however, don't you feel though that by showing all the sides to the coin there is no deception....
Grumbles.....torn on this matter arggg!