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HellHathWings



HellHathWings
Hell (Coven)

Vampire Rave member for 13 years.

Status:  Enchanter (80.93)
Rank:  Member
Honor 0    [ Give / Take ]
Affiliation:  Hell (Coven)
Account Type:  Regular
Gender:  Female
Birthdate:  January 10, 1983
Age:  38
Location: 

Scranton, PA




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Journal


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Quote:

A battle is never lost if you walk away with something, even if it is only your life!!!!!







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Name: Jenn or Jennifer; not Jen, Jenny or Jenna
Age: A Lady never tells, I am not a lady so 32
Gender: Normally, it would be obvious; however, I was born a male. I prefer being called female. I am pre-op so you can say I am a hybrid if it makes you feel better but a male with boobs is called transgender or transwoman, just so you know.
Sexual Interests: I still lean towards women, though, I have to say I question being with a guy. That may change later. I do have fetishes and hidden secrets, just like everyone else.
Religion/Spiritual Beliefs: Non-Denominational; Honestly, I am teetering here because I find truths in so many different areas and am being reawakened to things I once saw and turned my back on.
Politics: A tough discussion. I am against the politics of today though I do know there has to be some governing body.
Marital Status: Single and not sure if I like it or not
Race: Human, not Caucasian
Ethnic Background: German (originally, Hebrew), Irish, English, Welsh
Pigment of Skin: Who the hell cares but stop saying I am white
Children: Yes, 1 at home
Career: Stay at home parent though I have several past experiences
Criminal History: Yes, though I don’t feel like mentioned it all yet.
Height: 5’7”
Weight: 155 lbs
Body type: Average; not skinny, not overweight but I do have some fat so deal with it
Hair color: Dirty Blonde, looks brown
Hair styling: Straight about shoulder length
Eye Color: Blue
Glasses: Yes
Tattoos: 3, will get more
Piercings: 3, will get more
Smoker: Regular to Heavy
Drinker: Social/Moderate
Drugs: No, they are in my past, though some consider marijuana a drug
forbidden/Personality: My own, a little of different things
Stores I like: Wet Seal, Aeropostale, Hot Topic, Spencers
Movies: Anything that catches my eyes; really, I like a lot from different categories
TV Shows: Anything that catches my eyes; really, I like a lot from different categories
Music: Anything that catches my ears; really, I like a lot from different categories
Sports: I have my favorite teams but don’t follow sports
Romantic Activities: An area that I lost touch with
Activities and Interests: Shopping, Hair, Nails, Makeup, Dress-up, Making money, Magic the Gathering, Video Games, Computers, Board and Card Games, Collecting, Learning
Goals: Surgery, Financial Stability, Residential Stability, get my other children among other personal goals that don’t matter unless I can obtain financial and residential stability





I have troubles with profiles. I either say too much or don't say enough.

I don't do drugs. I don't drink. I don't do crimes. I am not a gangster. I mind my own business unless your business affects me, in which case, I don't always bite my tongue. I don't like stupidity, ignorance or unintelligent behavior. I am tired of this racial crap, segregation by income level and anything else that sets us aside from each other. However, if you aren't willing to learn, don't come near me. I am an individual. I do not like categories and titles. Since we have to be in one these days; I am a Juggalo by way of life, I have no religion (am non-denominational) and as for politics I wouldn't be able to put myself into a category.

I am not looking for a relationship. You are all asswipes and don't deserve my time. Maybe there is someone who is worth my time but I doubt it. I need someone who is good mother material to my daughter who I have full custody of and my other kids if the chance arises that I may be blessed with custody of or at least visitations with. However, as it seems, that won't ever happen. I will not say that the perfect mate for me is someone with a car, house, loads of money or any of that; however, I don't want any scumbags either. Even then, I got more important things to worry about than chasing people around. If a woman thinks they like me, they better be ready to step up as a mother and allow me to work on my hobby projects or they will be begging for time with me; help make the time or there isn't any. If I have the choice between hobby and sex partner, I choose hobby. And I for sure am not choosing you over my children.

I have a long history of crap in my life. My past is my past; I want it to stay that way. Anyone who tries using my past against me can go to hell. I have enough of that from people who aren't legally supposed to do it. I carry a burden on my shoulder at all times, sometimes leading me to depression, anger problems, suicidal tendencies, anti-social behavior and other mental blowout fun. Don't try to lift the burden, you will hurt yourself, not help me. I like being a ticking time bomb.

My interests and likes are both of happy nature and some that is dark. I also don't have everything clicked that I do like it. The thing is that I do have hope deep down inside that happiness may be out there. However, I can't count on it. From my experience, I am fated to be alone and depressed for the rest of my life with no chance to do what normal people can.

I have lived a huge lie for almost my entire life because of the biggest secret I have ever had to hold onto. It’s the secret that almost killed me so many times. I am not going into every detail right now. The secret is that I knew that I should be a female. This is one of the reasons why I have always sat in so much pain. I am a female and I am in the wrong body. This is a new beginning. If you don't support me then I don't need you in my life. I don't tell you what to do with your body or your life.

Please know that I thought this through. I have done research. I know what I am doing is right. I don't want your ridicule but if you feel you must, I can handle it. Nothing you can do or say will take this away. I will not change my mind, my heart, my soul or my attitude for anyone anymore. It sounds selfish and I don't care because it is MY time do what I need, not what others want. I am tired of hiding like a monster, like a freak. I am your friend, I am your family, I am a Juggalo, I am a Parent and most important I am Human.

Believe it or not, I am a hard worker. It is unfortunate that my body can't keep up anymore. I have a lot of limitations when it comes to trying to find an actual job. I hate to see someone who hasn't worked a day in thier life and are fully capable receiving SSI/SSDI and someone like me who busted their hump as much as possible sometimes working 80 hours a week or 40 hours in a row and can't get the same treatment. Almost all of you complain about an 8 hour shift yet don't know what it is like to work a 40 hour shift.

To be honest, I worked so hard while everyone else enjoyed life and tore my body apart to the point that now it can't keep up. I tore my mind apart. I tore up relationships. I tore up my own character. I have become a bitter and lonely person who can give a fuck less about your success. Now, all I do want to do is either die or find a way to enjoy life without the stress. It's someone else's fucking turn to be stressed while I enjoy myself. Problem is, enjoying life will never happen so give me death.















I like exotic dancers. Even if clothing on, the art is fantastic.








Some of my old writings (more in my journal) :


"Only some of the old ones can be held onto, so choose the good ones." Prince Glenn G Luscher III




"I have been brought here for a reason and I want to fulfill that reason. It has been a long road and I have made it this far why not finish it. It would be pointless to start over when I have so much." Prince Glenn G Luscher III




"I understand that right now it wouldn't work and yet it is something that both of us yearn for. I also understand that there are obstacles that may take months or years standing in between us. I don't understand why all this can't go away so we can move on." Prince Glenn G Luscher III

"This is the first time that I have been able to hang out with someone I like who likes me back and yet we are content with not doing anything. We are friends very good friends." Prince Glenn G Luscher III

"Building a stronger friendship will definately help later in life. And she will be there. So If you have a problem with her being around then you will become possessive and jealous and I won't like that." Prince Glenn G Luscher III

7-8-07
"What do you do when life itself engulfs you whole and tells you what you are going to do for a few weeks leaving you no control of yourself so you have to give in? Would you know it my experience has left me to enjoying the beauty life has to offer." Prince Glenn G Luscher III




Even a Prince has Flaws

fast music slows me down
slow music makes me depressed
heavy music calms me down
light music gives me energy

silence makes me want to kill
loudness makes me panic

when my life is going good women scare me
when my life is shitty all i can think about is women
having a women that i hate makes me work more
having a women that i like makes me suicidal

i would rather love my family from a distance than hate them up close

do not ask me to explain me or anything i do
do not listen to me when i talk about me doing something good, it's a lie

i've failed at everything and yet failure still scares me
i hate conflict and yet i have to create it to sleep at night










These are some images I found on other sites that I thought were. So I edited them.

The url where they originally came from are shown with each set of pics.

Enjoy!!!










Marvel Characters:



South Park Characters:



My Sonic Character



My Lego Character, Though I don't play legos. I thought this was cool.




Photobucket

Wicked Clown Clan

&

Protection Stamps



Juggalos

And

Juggalettes

----

----

----

With

Hatchets

Swinging

Photobucket

Crista
darkklord75
darknessisforever
jesse1987
lestatscountess
leviathandelioncourte
Neneka
PyroJuggalette666
Rayn
reaperofShadow1986
Sekment
TheHaunted
xnightstalker92x
XvampgurlX


PASS THE AXE

"Pass me something Sharp and Wicked and I'll pass it back don't worry I'll pass it back."

Hey click on the axe and grab it. Get your hands bloody baby! Add it to your page or put it in a comment box. Doesn't matter where you put it just PASS THE FUCKIN AXE!


The Juggalo Pledge:

I Pledge Allegiance To The Hatchet Of The Underground Society Of Juggalos, And For The Ninjas For Which It Stands, One Family, Under God, Full Of Freaks, With Faygo And Magic Neden For All!!






I do have friends who respect me enough that they will stand up for me. Watch Your Backs!







I am a proud member of the Evil Brotherhood Order. If you care to find out more information about this please contact the Founder of EBO.




Photobucket















Member Since: Apr 20, 2008
Last Login: Mar 09, 2015
Times Viewed: 11,688



Times Rated:720
Rating:9.653

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ThanaNight
ThanaNight
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Sep 24, 2021
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RedWitchMoon
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Apr 28, 2021

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