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insaneevil



Vampire Rave member for 18 years.

Status:  Irritater (16.57)
Rank:  Member
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Affiliation:  No affiliation.
Account Type:  Regular
Gender:  Female
Birthdate:  ?
Age:  ANCIENT
Location: 

adelaide, Australia




Journal


Bite insaneevil

Stalk insaneevil


Quote:

im me if you dont like that fact go to hell


anything from normal, poet, singer, guitarist, pianist,

poems i have written:

i mime the words
i softly whisper
scared that if you hear
it will all differ
i feel it form my heart
from way inside
this feeling im afraid of
i will soon no longer be able to hide
i want to tell you
i want and i try
this feeling is making me
well its making me cry
im scared of pain
im scared of you
i love you i know it
but do you love me too?
will this love last
or will it brake
cause if it does
the pain i dont think i can take
i need to reach inside
and find the courage to
to tell you the truth
the truth is i love you

fallen angel
broken wings
shattered heart
unforgiveable things
forgotten soul
wishing to die
happy memories
every night she cries
bodys abused
minds a wreck
waiting for a call
you she cannot forget
hiding pain
faking smiles
blade at her wrist
blood on the tiles
a sign of hope
new love begins
she wants him
but her heart wont let him in
they're all the same
they'll break your heart
he'll make it worth while
then tear it apart
maybe hes different
maybe the same
maybe worth while
but she cant stand the pain
gave her body
soul is free
that fallen angel
that broken girl is me
so much pain
tore me apart
too many tears
a broken heart
hes moved on
she must to
she still loves him
and forever will stay true
with all the peices
this broken heart
will love again
with a space set apart
for the first
she will never forget
and the things
she will never regret
this new love
may blossom and bloom
may bring her peace
or bring her doom
but she will love as if its the first
and she will smile
when worst comes to worst

tell me that you love me
tell me that you care
tell me that you need me
tell me you'll always be there
tell me you want me
tell me its true
tell me that you will miss me
if i do what i really want too
tell me to smile
tell me there is no need to cry
tell me im loved
tell me before i die
tell me im an angel
tell me how to fix my wings
tell me im beautinful
tell me all of these things
tell me im smart
tell me cool
tell me im a loser
tell me, or you wont see me back at school
tell me a lie
but say that its true
tell me you want me back
these are the things i really need you to do
tell me before i go
tell me before its too late
tell me now
call me your kate

Why do I still love you?
Why dont you care?
Why do Icut myself?
Why is this pain so hard to bear?
Why did you stop loving me?
Why did I give you my all?
Why do I cry myself to sleep?
Why do you never call?
Why did you hurt me?
Why dont I die?
Why do you laugh?
Why do I cry?
Why is everyone happy?
Why am i so sad?
Why am I being punished?
Why, what did I do that was bad?
Why did it all happen?
Why did it end?
Why did you love me?
Why do you now only want to be just a friend?
WHY WHY WHY
WHY IS IT SO
WHY WHY WHY
I REALLY NEED TO KNOW!!!!!!!!


chapter 1 of my book:

Chapter 1

He is so cute. He has longish black hair, freckles and blue eyes. He’s alive. I’ve been watching him for a while. Ever since I was told about his mum. Ever since I was told his mum, well, was damned.

I hate my truth. It haunts me. It all started when I was born. I was born addicted to speed. My mother was homeless and had sex with men for money. My father was in jail for murdering his ex-girlfriend. My mother left me at one-months old in a small, brown box next to an old, blue dumpster, behind a rusty, old warehouse. I was all alone. I was cold. I was hungry. I was screaming and crying and still no-one came to my aid. The screams wouldn’t stop coming out of my mouth, the tears wouldn’t stop streaming out of my eyes. My tears were like ice running down my rosy cheeks. Then there was the man…

He was old and tall. He had ratty, grey hair that hadn’t been washed in a while, his grey beard wasn’t much better. He stunk of sweat and dirt. He was extremely dirty. My frozen tears stopped when he appeared. He wore scraggy old clothes and a torn up, old, brown leather jacket. He picked me up. He carried me away. I felt safe in the strangers’ arms, like I was free from harm, like he would protect me. I felt like I could trust him.

He carried me away. He carried me to an alley way between two very old apartment buildings. There were more people like the man there. Some were sleeping in card board boxes; some were under rags hanging over rusty, metal poles. He took under one of these rag tents and laid me down. I slept. When I woke the moon and stars were shining in the beautiful night sky. I could see my surroundings by the glow of the full moon. I could see the man sitting by a fire. I felt safe. I blinked. He picked me up and took me closer to the fire, I was getting hot, and I was too close to the fire. I could feel flames burning my naked skin. All I could see were the red, orange and yellow flames all over my body. I began to scream, the pain was so intense, and the thick, black smoke was choking my screams. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t scream. The pain wouldn’t stop. No-one would save me. Suddenly, the burning stopped, all I could see was black. I didn’t see the flames. I didn’t need to breathe. I was free.

Chapeter 2

I was surrounded by white, people dressed in white and well, just white. Lying on the floor, people passed by without even a glance to me. I just lay there silent, waiting watching. Alone I waited for what seemed like an eternity. And in a split second no more white, but colors. All around me, a field of beautiful flowers. Every colour of the rainbow. The scent of spring, the lullaby of birds, the warmth of the sun, I was in paradise. It was so beautiful, so untouched, so magnificent that words cannot describe the way I felt lying there. Free.

A woman dressed in white appeared. She had soft, pale skin, beautiful, deep blue eyes, silky, blond hair; she was the most beautiful person I had ever seen. Her name was Celeste and she was my guardian. My guardian angel.
(more to come) (work is copywrited)

quizzes:

the Withered Lover
The Withered Lover


What sign of the Black Zodiac are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

blood
BloodRayne:
You are BloodRayne. You live for the hunt. All that
matters to you is the fresh kill and warm blood
on your lips. The red stuff drives you crazy
and you just can't get enough. You drain your
enemy dry and move on to the next, but no
matter how much you take, you can never
completely satisfy your blood lust.

A BloodRayne video game quiz -- What Rayne personality are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Going Under
Your Evanescence song is: Going Under
You are or have been in a relationship where
you were suppressed and unhappy. You were
treated badly, and were somewhat brainwashed.
Now you've woken up and are in deep pain. You
want some gratitude for all things you have
done for him/her, but don't get any. You feel
like you are falling and have difficulty
getting back on the right track again since
your mental abuse has taken a toll on you.

Screaming Deceiving and Bleeding for you
And you still won't hear me



What Evanescence song are you?[many outcomes + wonderful pictures]
brought to you by Quizilla

HASH(0x8d1e264)
BLACK


??Which colour of Death is yours??
brought to you by Quizilla

SystemOfADown
You are "Atwa" by System of a Down. You
were a happy person, thinking you were loved,
when in fact you were the opposite. Now, you
can't find happiness again. Being unloved is
not your thing, and you are now like a zombie,
just walking around without a purpose. A living
dead..


Which of the rock songs that I like are you? (pics)
brought to you by Quizilla

Take the quiz: "What Gruesome Death Are You? (contains yummy pics!)"

Artistic Suicide
Yeah, yeah, you're depressed. You're lonely. No one gets you. That's why you'll take a couple of razor blades and slice open your wrists. Who says suicide isn't gruesome? I'm sure that if you really put your mind to it, you'll be able to turn all of your pain into a work of morbid art that will take the forensics teams a long, long time to clean up. Unfortunately, right before you die, you're going to realize that you really DID want to live after all. Ain't life a bitch?

Black Goth
You Are A Black Goth. You Are Evil And Only Depend
On Your Self.


What Color Goth Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla








Your Birthdate: March 28

Your birth on the 28th day of the month (1 energy) adds a tone of independence and extra energy to your Life Path.

The number 1 energy suggest more executive ability and leadership qualities than you path may have indicated.

A birthday on the 28th of any month gives greater will power and self-confidence, and very often a rather original approach.



Unlike much of the other 1 energy, this birthday is one that endow with the ability to start a job and continue on until it is finished.

You may prefer to use the broad brush, but you can handle details as well.

You are sensitive, but your feeling stay somewhat repressed.

You have a compelling manner that can be dominating in many situations.





How evil are you?

I am Rabies. Grrrrrrrr!
Which Horrible Affliction are you?
A Rum and Monkey disease.



What Type of Killer Are You? [cool pictures]
brought to you by Quizilla

Advanced Global Personality Test Results
Extraversion |||||||||| 40%
Stability |||| 13%
Orderliness |||||||||| 33%
Altruism |||||||||||||||| 63%
Interdependence |||||| 23%
Intellectual |||||||||||||| 56%
Mystical |||||||||||||| 56%
Artistic |||||||||||||||||| 76%
Religious |||| 16%
Hedonism |||||||||||||| 56%
Materialism |||||||||||||||| 70%
Narcissism |||||| 23%
Adventurousness |||||||||||||||||||| 83%
Work ethic |||||||||||||||| 70%
Self absorbed |||||||||||| 50%
Conflict seeking |||| 16%
Need to dominate |||||| 30%
Romantic |||||||||||||||| 70%
Avoidant |||||||||||||||||| 76%
Anti-authority |||||||||||| 50%
Wealth |||||||||||| 43%
Dependency |||||||||||||||| 70%
Change averse |||||||||||||||||||| 83%
Cautiousness |||||||||||||||| 70%
Individuality |||||||||||||||| 70%
Sexuality |||||||||||| 50%
Peter pan complex |||||||||||| 43%
Physical security |||||||||||||||| 70%
Physical Fitness |||||||||| 37%
Histrionic |||||||||||| 43%
Paranoia |||||||||||||||||||| 90%
Vanity |||||||||||||||| 63%
Hypersensitivity |||||||||||||||||| 76%
Female cliche |||||||||||| 43%
Take Free Advanced Global Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

Death
You are sad because of your life and obsession with
death

HASH(0x8c7ee60)
Amy from Evanescence!! You baby, are fucking
gorgeous and you have an awesome voice!!

Goth
You are a REAL GOTH. Congradulaions :) Let Darkness
Be Your Guided Light. (You must be
artistic...some how all goths are. drawing,
painting, musician. stuff like that)

...
Your evil eyes are RED! Your evil. Cold hearted.
Your against the world and love to kill.


What Evil Eyes Would You Have?
brought to you by Quizilla

Dark_Angel
Night


?? Which Angel Or Demon Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla

Depressed
Your connection with darkness is through your
depression. Hated, sad and often feeling
lonely, there is only a few that appreciate the
real you. You tend to keep to yourself and away
from the world since you don't want to be hurt
and betrayed again. Music gives you the
understanding you need to get through, it's
your "therapy". Or you express
yourself through art or writing. Chances are
you're also an anti-social person, who only
likes being with close friends, if even that.
The world has finally showed it's true face for
you and you wish life wasn't this miserable to
live through. Maybe you'll find happiness in
the future, but right now you're just hiding
away from the world. Who needs people anyway?


What is your connection with darkness? (pics)
brought to you by Quizilla

HASH(0x8bd11ac)
Looks like you have failed and will be going to
Hell. v.v No worries, over half the people who
take this quiz will be getting this result. At
least you were honest to answer the questions
truthfully and you might stand a chance in
getting into Heaven. Oh well, look on the
bright side, at least you won't be cold!


Are you going to Heaven or Hell?
brought to you by Quizilla

alt_text
Dude you have split personality.get help...please
rate!!!


How insane are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

http://members.rogers.com/lim.jennifer/dark.jpg
In your eyes, people can't seem to see anything
because your eyes are covered up by tears! You
are constantly hurt and depressed... No one
seems to understand how you feel because
everyone is scared to get close to you... You
long to be able to reach out and tell someone
everything, and all of your problems... But you
have no one to tell, or they just don't seem to
want to hear what you have to say. You've been
hurt many times that you don't seem to have any
tears left to shed, or if you do, they're an
endless river flowing... You've started to hide
and bottle up all or your problems and
feelings, hoping that maybe they just will go
away... You want company, but at the same time,
you're scared of it. Your sanctuary is your
room where you can just be alone and try to
throw away all of your aching pains. You're
dark and mysterious and people like you for
that reason. Even if you think you're all by
yourself in the dark, someone is always there
with you. Your special someone wants to admit
and show their feelings towards you, but
they're afraid of how you'll take it. Get out
more and enjoy life because, it is far too long
to frown your way through :)


What Lies Behind Your Eyes?
brought to you by Quizilla

normal
You are a half angel. You can't seem to find your
wings to fly off into happiness. You often
seem depressed but really your trying find
something that you sometimes don't even know.
You can't help but feel lost and so sometimes
loose faith in what comes ahead but even if you
do find what your looking for you keep the
happiness inside but none the less you are a
kind person.


What Angel Resides In Your Soul?
brought to you by Quizilla

Loyal
You need someone loyal.
People have let you down since forever and you
have always been left by yourself. Your life
spark is now barely flickering and there is a
big feeling of emptiness and hopelessness. You
don't know what to do anymore in your life and
everything has a sense of meaningless to it.
Though you're not only sad, you also carry hate
and many grudges on people. You have a hard
time letting people in, but with your history
you don't even desire that so much anymore.


What Do You Need in Your Life? [dark pics]
brought to you by Quizilla

lonely
You are a dark person. You have a really quiet and
really a i dont' care attitude. You like to be
alone and that is what you enjoy. You don't
like to be around others and you'd rather be
away from here. You have a get away from me
look and others find you bitchy and
self-rigious. You'd rather read than be at a
fair but that's ok because that's who you are.


Who are you inside?
brought to you by Quizilla

Broody
Your word is: Brooding. You are a true thinker and
often try to figure out the meaning of life,
why we are all here etc. You may not be so
social, and often think twice before acting but
those thoughts you have in your mind never stop
flowing in. Sometimes you can be so
concentrated you forget about other things that
you have to do. Don't change, this world needs
deep people.


What dark word represents you? (anime pics and 7 outcomes)
brought to you by Quizilla

Info Grey
Your Heart is Grey


What Color is Your Heart?
brought to you by Quizilla

Take the quiz: "Are You Fit For Satan?"

Yes
You are fit for Satan! Good for you. You've escaped the lies of Christianity and other white-light religions. You're not a victim of that crap...you're your own person, and you know the truth!
MEET MY FRIEND!

Yo loser!

Don't come any closer!

I'll rip you into pieces
If you touch my friend,
KATE!

This is a kick a$$ profile by the way!
Do you also want a friend? Click HERE


Blood-and-Death Goth
Vampire Goth -- Perhaps the closest to the
"lolo goth," you are morbid and
dreary. You like to make people feel
uncomfortable around you, and you're happiest
when going to a highly public place with enough
friends who share your interests to make
massive crowds shifty. You have an unusual
liking to blood.


Which Gothic Stereotype Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Seventh Level of Hell!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:
LevelScore
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)Very Low
Level 2 (Lustful)High
Level 3 (Gluttonous)Low
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)Low
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)Very High
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)High
Level 7 (Violent)Extreme
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)High
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)Moderate

Take the Dante's Inferno Hell Test

Take the quiz: "What Kinda Guys Do You TRULY go for? (girls only unless your a gay guy..then its fine)"

goth
you really like goths! AWESOME! you like the whole mysterious attitude. they may be scary on the outside, but if you get to know them, some are hopless romantics!! real good choice in guys i'd say! and alot of them arent half bad lookin either! you love the fact that they would love to write poetry to you anyday!







You are a Rocker Girl!
If you don't have musical talent, you've got a talent for picking out great CD's.
Music rules your life - and you've got the best MP3 collection of anyone you know.
Many guys find you intimidating, but a select few think you're the catch of a lifetime.
Start hanging out in more used record stores, and you'll find love with a fellow rocker!




What Kind of Girl Are You? Take This Quiz :-)




Find the Love of Your Life
(and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.









Take the What High School
Stereotype Are You?
quiz.

Afraid
Why do you cry?

brought to you by Quizilla

forget
You cut to forget somthing/someone. Someone else
would eat a whole lot of chocolate when they
don't feel so happy, you lock yourself up and
try to cut your memories away. You look like a
normal person, 'till someone brings up things
you don't want to think about. But it's hard to
forget things you are completely obsessed with,
isn't it?


What Kind Of Cutter Are You? (~TrIgGeRiNg~ pics)
brought to you by Quizilla

depress
The world is cruel, fate is bitter and there's no
place for you anymore. Your thoughts can often
lead to, 'Why live when I feel like dying ?
Yours is an illness of sorrow.


What's Your Disorder ?
brought to you by Quizilla

Take the quiz: "What Kind Of Morbid Are You?(Pics+Plz Rate)"

Heartbroken Morbid
You've had your heart torn out and it hurt. You've never been able to get over it. You're obsessed with making others feel the pain you've felt, especially the one who hurt you.

Take the quiz: "Which member of SLipKnoT are you?"

Joey Jordison
Your really small but upbeat and layed back. when you need to move though you are powerful and destructive! you love black metal and death metal! and your an amazing drummer

Take the quiz: "What DEATH METAL Band Are You?"

Severed Savior
Your new to the scene but YOU KNOW WHAT THE FUCK YOUR DOING!!! damn do you ever.... you may be out of the sunshine state, but there is no sunshine in your dark cavern. All day you toil in your workshop, while all the other kids play... but your effoerts will be rewarded.. as soon as you untie my hands.....

Take the quiz: "Which Slipknot Single Are You?"

Duality
You are Duality from the Vol. 3: The Subliminal Verses album. You feel like your life has been thrown in the garbage. It may be your fault, it may not, but you use self-mutilation or other untraditional methods to help ease the emotional pain.

Take the quiz: "How suicidal are you?"

Your extreamly suicidal, get help soon.
Your extreamly suicidal... your not alone! I think you should get help. I am getting help right now, it sux but maybe it will help you. If your not going to get help... then make sure you do it right.

Take the quiz: "WHAT RELIGION BESTS SUITS YOU?"

Devil Worshipper
You've probably been called possessed loads of times, you're pure rebellion, you won't let anyone tell you what to do, and you wouldn't set foot in a Christian church unless to blaspheme it. If anyone was ever stupid Enough to mess with you, you'd probably murder them!

i have been trying to figure out the meaning of life im not going very good i keep coming to a dead end

im a nice person message me if u want i will not turn you down

OH IF YOU POST HERE COULD YOYU PLEASE COMMENT ON YOUR OPPINOIN OF THE MEANING OF LIFE. I DONT SEE ANY POINT FOR US TO BE HERE BUT IF YOU DO PLEASE TELL ME!!!!!!


Member Since: Jul 30, 2005
Last Login: Dec 13, 2005
Times Viewed: 1,895



Times Rated:258
Rating:8.422

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Cadrewolf2
Cadrewolf2
22:48
Jan 04, 2024
Real vampires love Vampire Rave.
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14:52
Nov 15, 2023

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