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I'm tired and worried about life. bv

He was my ex boyfriend.



He stopped talking to everyone. I had the mentality that if he didn’t want to speak to me I didn’t want to speak to him.



I was stubborn.



I loved him still but I was angry.



We were both broken inside, a bit perfect for each other, but also toxic.



I haven’t heard from him for 2 months, he said he was busy with college the last time I spoke to him.



I texted him every morning for a month. Then I gave up.



He killed himself Monday.



I found out today.I cried. So hard.



I feel as if someone has ripped out part of my heart.



He can’t just be gone. The world can’t just keep going as if he never existed, but it will.



My best friend told me he was gone, he cried while telling me.



He told me at dinner, I couldn’t eat I just sat there. Shock maybe.



Pain?



I feel empty, he will never come back.



He needed someone, I wasn’t there for him. He needed someone to care, I didn’t. He needed someone to love him, I acted like I didn’t. He needed a friend, I wasn’t one.



I gave up him like everyone else, and now he is gone.



Don’t I feel like a dick…..

COMMENTS

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Lullaby
18:06 Sep 24 2011

Oh honey. :/

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She is the only one that has been there for me forever and always will be.



Moms gotta love them. Even if you don't always show how much you appreciate them.



I understand how much she has to go through and I know I'm not a lot of help. I'll try harder.



Mom, I love her.



One day I'll buy her a big house with an art studio.

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TheSYSTEM
23:00 Sep 16 2011

Aww That's a sweet thing to say about your mother.

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I'm just an angry person with so much pain inside.

I don't like the way my family treats me sometimes.



I never say anything.



Everyone acts like I don't have feelings.



Whatever.

I don't try and be deep.



I just write how I feel.



Growing up is tough.

I'm not sure why all these little kids are in a hurry to be all grown up.



The only only good thing about growing up is drinking and even then I can't do it legally yet.



I'm tired, I need a job, I need more money, I need more sleep, I nee less work, I need to go to practice, I need a copy of myself.





Life really just sucks if you don't have money.

COMMENTS

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Stranger
21:03 Sep 10 2011

Drinking isn't all that awesome.

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