08:29 Nov 10 2024
Times Read: 751
I had to see my aunt Stacy today, after all the drama that went down over the election. She removed me from facebook after trying to lecture me and vaguely threatening to not attend my wedding. But yeah, my mom and her sisters try to get together every month and have lunch together, catch up, and it just happened that the weekend they settled on this time was a weekend I wasn't with Logan. I haven't been able to go to one of these lunches in months because they do usually fall on days I'm out at Logan's, and it's not worth driving back home for a few hours. Anyway, I only went because I wanted to see my aunt Sue, since the last time I saw her she had just gotten out of the hospital, and she wasn't in the best shape. I worry about her, as she's got a lot of health issues, she's on dialysis, and all this other stuff, so I'm always worried when I hear she's in the hospital that the outcome won't be good. It's hard to see her so frail. But, she seems to being doing alright, and I was happy to get to spend some time with her. That's going to be the hardest part of moving out of state, literally all my family lives in California, so moving halfway across the country is going to be hard when im so close with my family. But yeah, Stacy pretty much ignored me the whole time we were together, save for when she wanted to talk about Christmas.
Since I was a kid, my mom's family has always done Christmas Eve at my aunt Sue's, excluding the few years she lived in Arizona. So, it's a family tradition to spend the day at her house with all the cousins and the kids. But last year my aunt Stacy decided she wanted to do every other year at her house. So this year, that's what it's supposed to be. Only, she doesn't want to do Christmas Eve. She wants to do it the weekend before. And she's all annoyed that her own kids probably won't be there and a bunch of other shit. It's like, why volenteer to do Christmas Eve, if it's not even going to be on Christmas Eve? It's not lessening the work for my aunt Sue, since her family is still going to want to do Christmas Eve. Plus, that's a weekend Logan has Mina, so he wouldn't be able to come. She's like, just invite Mina, and I'm like, no. Mina isn't my child, so I don't feel comfortable forcing her to spend time with my family. They can be a lot, and I don't want her to feel out of place. I don't even really want to go, since why would I spend time around someone who has no issues ignoring me? Someone I don't really want to associate with because of the values they have? So, I mean, I don't know. If I don't do the Christmas stuff with my mom's family, it'll be a pretty dull Christmas, as the kids and Liz will be up in Oregon, Kevin has work, I don't see my dad's family, Logan has Mina... So it's really just going to be me and my mom. Which I'm fine with, that's how Thanksgiving is going to go this year. I'm just on the fence about everything. Politics is bound to come up, and pretty much all my family is conservative and I just don't want to be around it. I'm already on edge enough about everything going on, everything being promised, that I'm afraid if something is said, I'll go off. Or I'll be ignored by people, and that's shitty, too. And it'll be hard to deal with happy family shit when my fiancé won't be there with me. I'm just annoyed right now, mostly for the way my own aunt treated me today. It really doesn't make me want to spend any more time around her. It's like my childhood all over again, and I will not be made to feel like I'm wrong for what I choose to believe in. Not anymore. She got away with making me feel like garbage when I was a kid because I couldn't really fight back, but I will stand up for myself now if I need to. So yeah, things to think about. Maybe I'll just write it all off and just spend the day with Logan, maybe go see a movie or something.
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