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i am so fuckign stupid. i am tired of trying to help people who just fucking blow me off and say " you didnt do it like i said" ( when i did)and " you are a worthless peice of shit, get over yourself, you will never be right"

you know wat, that may be true. but atleast i tried!!!!!!!!! soemtimes i have absolutely no control over things. if i could, i'd have control over the entire universe, spin it around just right, and toss you out of this fucking reality. it wouldnt hurt every now and then to say " thanks anyway and well, hey, atleast you TRIED"!!!!!!!!!!

my fuckign mom needs to do the same thing. i was in the shower when my boyfriend called me...so i didnt hear the phone ring nor did i answer. however i did check the caller id to see if someone had called, and low and behold, there he is...called 7 minutes before then. i call him back and find out hes leaving. so im like "ok,i'll go and let you do your thing, watever." then he says "no, its fine, your fine. stay and talk to me." so here i am feeling like a complete idiot cuz i cant think of anything to say so i say im leaving. he asks "why" and i said "its cuz i feel like an ass to have called back and not say anything. i feel like im invading" he says "your not invading" then mom popps out and screams at me. "why didnt you pick up the phone?!?!" i say calmly, " i was in the shower" she rolls her eyes...sees that i accidentally knocked over a plate with food on it ( for the record, i was going to pick it up untill she said something.) then she starts bitching about that. whatever. she goes in the bathroom, by that time...roger is asking me wats wrong and why arent i talking...those kinds of questions just pissed me off even further. i cranked up the tv which was playing Static X Destroyer. mom comes out of the bathroom and bellows" you ever do that again and i will make sure that you WONT have ANYTHING! no phone, no tv, no radio, NOTHING!" I sort of lost my temper and threw the phone on a pillow near my feet and burry my head under the other pillows after turning the tv off completely. then she starts bitching about the water that supposedly i put on the floor when i was taking my shower. i didnt do that.. its her sucky ass fucking hand made shower. i cant help if she was so fucking fat she broke it the dumb bitch. roger by then hung up. and thats how i managed for everyone to hate me all in just a half an hour...a whole one if you count the damn shower.