EstrangedOne's Journal

EstrangedOne's Journal


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9 entries this month

11:39 Oct 23 2013
Times Read: 666

Well, I've finally finished most of my coat. Almost all of the collar, anyway. It's much bigger, now (longer and wider), but also thinner, so I don't need to worry about the damn thing scrunching into oblivion. However, I still have quite a bit of work left to do on it, before it's complete. It's a good thing I learned the tailoring trade when I was little, or I would be up a creek without a paddle, on it.




"Trance land"

09:04 Oct 21 2013
Times Read: 676

I really think I need to learn to stop putting myself into a trance state when I'm talking to people. Granted, it does help with giving my body a LITTLE bit of rest, but at the same time, it doesn't quite help when I end up 'submerging' myself when I only want to go into a shallow trance. And by "submerging" myself, I mean that I am still completely conscious, but I am as unresponsive as a person in a coma. And along with that, all things tend to 'freeze', to me, so I can't tell what the Hell is going on when or how.

The one problem with it is that I haven't figured out how to pull myself out of the trance, instantly, yet, and I still seem to go a little too far, while only intending to go into a shallow trance. Hence, I end up looking like I'm sleeping.

The big 'loop' in that, though?-- I barely move, At All. Sadly, that's the one way a person can tell I've entered a self-trance, and funny enough, no one else can do put me into that state. It's one step shy and yet one further than my deepest meditative state. Don't ask me how that works, because I wouldn't be able to explain it to you very well, unless you are at least vaguely familiar with trance-state and meditation.

The only reason I say all this is because I made the mistake, Yet Again, Tonight, of putting myself in trance, so I could think about something, and I keep trying to keep myself responsive, for the sole point of relaying what I'm focusing on. Unfortunately, I still haven't gotten far enough with trance-state to be able to pull myself out instantly, so I ended up STUCK in that damn state for two hours. Oddly enough, the only reason I knew (and still know) it was that long is because I put myself into trance at about eleven, and finally 'stepped' or 'broke' out of it at almost two. Along with that, I keep getting that "light" feeling in my feet, while in the trance, and the next thing I knew, I come out with my hands posed like I was setting a Seal. For those who aren't familiar with something called "Will Magick", that isn't good, with me. (i.e., I sensed an intruder when I came out of it.



21:56 Nov 04 2013

As in something followed you back? Or you just became more aware of something that may have already been there?

01:03 Nov 05 2013

Neither. What I mean is that something tried to 'break' into the house while I was either long into my trance or already on the way Out of it. The last time it happened, I caught a rather unpleasant Spirit trying to bring harm to someone I knew, and my first instinct was that said reaction. The only thing my friend said to me was something about how "insanely fast I was on the trigger", when even they couldn't sense it until AFT of my reaction.


14:33 Oct 16 2013
Times Read: 683

Currently working on the sleeves for my coat. Once they're done, the Collar is next. I have the back piece finished, and thuse far, it's all looking great, apart from the lacking sleeves. I should have it done soon, though. But even after this, there is still at least another thing after the collar is done.




Impossibility? Or Just Plain Stupidity?

00:09 Oct 15 2013
Times Read: 701

One must love it when the Doubting Thomas is put in his place by his own wife. My idiot half brother still doubts my ability to see in the dark, amd his wife just told him "you would be surprised to see how he moved during thw power outage - the fucker scared the shit out of me, I'll tell you that", essentially telling him to shut his trap before he dug a deeper hole.

I swear, sometimes, you just cannot convince people of anything, even having all the proof that can possibly exist. What it takes to get them to use the heads on their shoulders can be inconceivable, at times.

And the idiot wonders why I claim not tie to him, other than the fact that we're half-blood to one another. He may have the smarts of all the people on his side of the bloodline, but he sure as Hell isn't the brightest bulb in the box, most days.

I've shown him, before, that I can see in the dark, and yet he is still convinced that I can't, even when I can navigate forestry like nothing, on a black, moonless night. It only stands to reason that some people are just too stupid to accept the truth of something beyond their comprehension or convictions. Still, he is even convinced that I would have dust for blood. I have yet to meet anyone with that manner of physicality, but apparently, some people are just too bent upon believing the myths of thw world as opposed to the truth and facts of the matter.



05:46 Oct 15 2013

Some people do not want to believe any thing that they do not want to accept or that do not want to understand. I hate that crap when it happens.


Out of Contact

10:33 Oct 13 2013
Times Read: 709

It's very likely that I'll be out of contact for awhile. At&t is deciding to be pathetic, and raise the bill for a charge of use I haven't used, so my phone will be shut off for awhile as a result.

Once I have a new phone and number, I'll be letting some people know the number, so I can be contacted. But don't be surprised if that takes awhile. I'm pretty damn sure that everyone is aware of the government shutdown, of late, and frankly, I know full well, that though some might not acknowledge it, everything is going to end up going straight to Hell, because of it.

Sad, really. I don't need a degree in it to know what's going to happen. This is just one reason I've been making plans to move. I know that won't fix the shutdown situation or anything financial, but it will at least be something I feel is right.



05:51 Oct 15 2013

I understand what you mean. Even if they extend everything to keep it from all shutting down, it will just be a matter of time before every thing completely shuts down sooner or later. I know a lot of people that I have talked to that say "oh they won't shut every thing down" I had to quit talking to them about it because they are not seeing the reality of it all. I think most people are watching t.v and playing video games and living in fantasy land to see what is really going on around them. I have had people get down right hateful with me about it all, calling me a doomsday conspiracy person... lol!


This One Tends To Ring in My Ears, At Times~~

08:50 Oct 09 2013
Times Read: 723




New Military Coat

09:31 Oct 07 2013
Times Read: 734

I have a new military coat, from WWII, now. Bulgarian Army, actually. I have to say one thing about it-- the man I got it from took Damn good care of it. It isn't very often one finds a piece of clothing from anything before Vietnam, that is in good condition. But then, this thing was also made to last. Granted, it's a mix of wool and "mole hair", as they call it. But damn. It 'flows' like a fine leather.

But I also need to do a few alterations on it, so it suits me more. It is a little bit wide in the top half.



05:52 Oct 15 2013



Not remaining on here with the Computer~

02:52 Oct 05 2013
Times Read: 747

There is definitely something wrong with this sites software. And people wonder why I'm working on "HTF".

Well, I won't be on here, anymore, as long as I use my computer. But I can and will still be here with my phone. At least, that way, there is a lesser window to be used for whatever is going on. Every time I'm on here, with the computer, the wireless modem goes on the fritz.

If anyone else is dealing with this, then let me know, because I have a feeling that Cancer just won't do anything about it, or Can't do anything about it, which either way, is getting on my nerves. I'm no geek, but I'm no idiot either. If anyone wishes to contact me for something (especially if to join in with the progress of my and my sister's Community, "HTF"), then leave me a message, and I'll leave you either with my number or my personal e-mail address (for which I may need you to do the same). I'll be using my phone to do most things in connection with the Rave, so the response time may be somewhat limited, for a little while.

However, I think I may also have a word with Cancer, himself, if I am able to do so, because if there are more people than just myself having this problem, then I have a strange feeling that Cancer may also have a leech, somewhere in his little plethora of friends. I don't feel like having the same thing happen, with HTF, because I don't feel like having other peoples' lives compromised in any way, just because of information being stolen and then used to make someone else rich.

"HTF" is a place for those who are seeking it. Otherwise, it wouldn't be so damn remote. The one thing about it that "stands out in the crowd" is Me, and there is a damn good reason for that. In any case, this is beginning to feel like a "rant", which isn't really my intent.




03:07 Oct 03 2013
Times Read: 756

I swear, some barbers are positively Insane. I don't know how or why, but I just watched a video of a bunch of barbers showing off their skills, and one of these characters - a maniac, at that - I cutting a woman's hair With A BLOW TORCH. All I can say to this is "What The Hell???"

Professional or not, that's one thing that makes me glad I do my own cutting and style. Just give me a decent sized, strong blade, and a sharpening stone, and I'm good with that. At least I don't have to pay for a barber.



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