Because I decided to homeschool my oldest, I put in my two weeks back in August. My husband and I discussed it and we made the choice together. He makes decent money and we get by fine. However, savings is not happening at the rate it once was and it makes me anxious because, to be perfectly honest, when Em was diagnosed with cancer and treatments started, I was going into debt trying to keep up with the chemotherapy, surgery, and other oncology bills and his insurance didn't fucking kick in until the last month of the twelve months of treatment, so everything was basically out of pocket. I was fortunate enough to have friends who helped through the GoFundMe set up for his treatments but there is no way in hell I want to be unprepared for something like that again.
I lose a lot of sleep over that at night. Worries and whatnots.
I've been out from that job since 8/21. I have my re-entrance interview to return to work in October. They're going to work around my homeschooling schedule. This makes life easier for all of us as 1: I work from home- no commute times and no babysitting issues, 2: I make more than my husband does with this job- meaning I can pay the bills and his checks can go towards the house, repairs, and savings as it did before, 3: my husband will not need a second job (he does roofing, I hate the idea of him having a second job where he is already getting up every morning before dawn for and this second job will force him to be working until 1-2 am with an hour drive home-v meaning less sleep while still doing manual labor on a fucking rooftop. Absofuckinglutely not.).
Em has already expressed his displeasure at me going back to work. He has been enjoying me being a full time Mom again and after explaining it's not like I am leaving the house (I had to before due to IT issues but those were thankfully resolved) to return to the office (as he is immunocompromised so I get the option to stay home should I absolutely need/want to), I will ALWAYS be home, the only difference is I will be at the computer doing work while they relax. I can still cook dinner, bath times, etc. Only real difference is I won't be sitting on the couch, lol. Plus offices aren't even looking to be resuming any kind of normalcy- remote work seems to be the future.
I have also been given options for three other companies for remote work. I am entertaining them, as if the pay is better with the schedule flexibility I want/need, I may take those offers up instead.
We shall see.
I will still be starting school, but I changed enrollment dates. I will start in April, instead of October. This is will also allow for my job to also be well informed of the school obligations for both myself and my son and be able to accommodate that scheduling.
Totally forgot about the Member's Pages.
I wrote some weird, honestly totally shit I would do, things.
I have made this same journal entry MANY times....
All I can do is sit and scratch my head and contemplate life and the people who walk freely around the planet sucking up the oxygen... I mean.... is it even getting to their brains? Maybe that is the problem.... maybe they are walking around sucking up methane instead and that is why the thoughts being expressed in these journals are pure shit.
It's like they had a stroke and then started hallucinating all at once.
While smoking meth laced weed!
I’ve said countless times reading them out loud is like playing hopscotch but pausing between each jump lol.
Here ya go Mogy.
I know you went looking for it.
Scarlette vomited all over my bed twice last night, so naturally I'm up and down all night keeping an eye on her. Woke up perfectly fine and running around the house at 0515 like a bat out of hell screeching with her balloons. So naturally it causes a ripple effect- I slipped while washing a glass and sliced up my dominant hand (took a chunk out of the pinkie and sliced a deep ass fucking flap out of the side of my palm) and then Prancer cunt punched me when he flew across the yard in excitement and forgot to stop before leaping. Then I trip over a toy and bit my tongue shortly afterwards.
It wasn't even 0800 yet.
It's one of THOSE days...
At least it still feels like fall... Chilly 65-70° most of the day.
Omg Dude that thing is on steroids I just got the damn chills!
You are better and more compassionate than I am. It would have seen its last day that day with me. I go into fight or flight and I"m not a runner, so normally it's a fight lol. Kill or be killed scenario always lol.
Yeh, not gonna lie... he that thing would've been a goner.... can't say I wouldn't have shot it.... axed it, stabbed it with a machete'.... there is no telling what depths I would have gone to to protect my children..... he would have been a dead fuzzy nope with 8 stiff legs.... I likely would've burned him after to make sure the job was complete! JUST NO!...
Beautiful!!!! A great fb group to check out for all of your bug needs and learning is All Bugs Go to Kevin. A lot of people swear it has helped them with spider fears and other bug phobias.
Nooooo. Just no. Actually not just no, fucking no. That thing is for real. I would have died. I think you win the worst spider experience of September 2021 award. But in the future should you need this tidbit of information, hornet spray can kill a snake, so I am guessing it might could kill that nightmare. And the good thing about hornet spray is that you can be way far away. In fact, I am putting it on my list for Wal-Mart pickup. I think I used my last can on actual hornets. LOL.
Oh, and while I like you a lot, don't come to Alabama if you are looking to get away from gnarly critters with all sorts of legs and eyes.
It makes a person wonder when one is love bombing in a public display- love and affection towards one person while the other half displays manipulative antics and displays (Examples: things they purchased with the other half's money, what they are going to buy), selfishness ("we didn't do everything I wanted to do!"- Woe is me bullshit), and insanity.
Like, I do not comprehend how people with such destructive, delusional mindsets aren't being monitored by a 24/7 care team- especially one with a psychologist on hand.
Or maybe they are; they're living in a legit fantasy world, locked behind large magnetic doors with security guards keeping them in, drugs administered every 4 hours to keep them from being too active, and we are just watching their mental break downs happen every single day because the somehow earned computer privileges?
Wouldn't that be an interesting twist in events?
That would be a great television show! A Truman show type thing, but for the mentally unstable! I know the perfect name for the title... I bet you know what I am thinking for it too! LOL!
They make me laugh. It’s a delusional comical train wreck. There’s times when I have to think they can’t be serious and are looking for a rise, but then again they could be that crazy. It’s truly amazing.
I just think it's funny how they gaslight each other.
It's so dead in here, it is kind of eerie.
Fuck, man. I remember back almost 13 years ago when I was a newb and there was countless shit to do, people to talk to, contests, crest and meme making, active House and Coven threads and contests, Vampbox adventures, the Forum was POPPING, then when the webcams came into play- even more so. We'd get on webcams together, with everyone joining in and just letting the insanity come forth.
It's like some people just sucked the life out of everything. Year after year they keep on with the same shit and drive the decent folks away.
I miss the old way things were around here. The escape from day to day living and the pure enjoyment I felt coming on here and seeing the people I loved talking to and really connected with being there. The immediate flood of messages back and forth about any and everything- even just stupid little memes or stories we wanted to share to make each other laugh. I really do miss all of that...
I miss seeing Morri and Moonie doing side by side cams and everyone literally jumping in to interact- drinks in hand and ready for a night full of laughter- Even Cancer himself joining in at times. I miss the sisters (Vampirewitch39, Nightgame, and Elemental) doing their cams and everyone racing to join in, too. I miss the chatter. I miss seeing the journal entries of Deity, Bones, Vampirewitch39, Nightgame, and Elemental, Isis101, meeper, Sevenn, PAGAN, PhoenicianDream, sPerAnZa, ThothLestat, WildChild... I miss Sahahria's voice. I really do. I miss the random picture texts she would send us and I miss her randomly popping in to see how everything was doing. I miss our conversations. I really fucking miss those conversations.
I have been fortunate enough to keep contact with a bunch of people off of here, but still...
Fuck, it's not the same anymore.
It's like, life took a turn and I left only to come back to a graveyard. Profiles that lay dead for years, from once very active and close members, skeletal remains of what were.
Life has turned a few corners and dropped off a few cliffs in the last decade, I know. Doesn't make it any less... Weird to find how silent everything is now.
Dude. I feel old at the ripe age of 34. haha
Gosh, I know. I went on cam the other day and had 3 people in there. It almost felt like old times. I miss the way things were too.
It is sad but true. There were many years here that people asked for things to be fixed including the web cams and vamp box.. when they finally got what they asked for recently, not many people jumped in and used them. It is always exciting for me when members from the past, like your self , come back. I hope those of us still around can come together to breath new life into the dark network.
I know! I miss so many as well! Deity always made me laugh and Sevenn was always so much fun to talk to. It makes me feel fortunate for the few of us that are still around. Some is better than none, but absolutely I miss so many people! The random witty banter back and forth in the vamp box... ESPECIALLY when we were trying to over chat the drama that would happen after warnings were given.... LOL!
I've told cursedtodarkness and moonie the same exact thing when I came back from my time away. So many people I yearn to see come back and have conversation with again.
sarharia ( god I wish
whoops a lot of my post cut off.
was saying I also miss daire and nicnivian, but am glad to make the new friends I have (cursedtodarkness and vxvampyre) :)
and I got to reconnect with moonie!
Everywhere I click I see a person I want to desperately see again.
I should have my books within the next two weeks to start my classes on 10/4.
Mortuary Science. Looking forward to starting classes. Especially interested in the embalming labs. I know (and don't care) that I am weird and I have always wanted to do this. I have an amazing husband who has never held me back and has always pushed me forward in what I wanted to pursue. Em keeps calling me Mama Morticia. Hahaha
That's a very cool pursuit!
Ha ha Mama Morticia.. that's cute! You should have that put on a shirt or coffee mug! lol
Pulmonary hypertension can arise after a strenuous pregnancy. One of the symptoms is feeling lightheaded or dizzy, and also a fluctuation in blood pressure. It would be worth bringing up at your next cardiologist appt. Hope you’re feeling better.
They already have it under control- Thankfully it is not pulmonary hypertension.
This week has just been a long one and I spent a good chunk of it in the ER for myself today. Not injury, per say, but stupid fucking medical shit that just randomly popped up leaving me needing to see a doctor ASAP and my primary care didn't have any openings and as soon as her NP heard my voice, immediately told me to go to the closest ER.
Pregnancy with my youngest did a number on my body so the repercussions of it are slowly working their way to the surface. First it was my heart and blood pressure. (Pre-eclampsia and hyper tension which caused me to have emergency surgery for birth three weeks early as I was admitted and unable to stay completely awake due to my BP flipping from one extreme of being too high to dropping to too low.) Thankfully that's under control now and monitoring my BP shows that it's leveling out finally. Still have to watch it, though. I've been known to get very dizzy and light headed and have occasionally came close to fainting, due to my BP in the last 21 months. That's been fun.
Now it's an oral issue with a tooth that shattered when I was pregnant that we thought was fixed, but now it's showing there was more damage that was missed, so I am on a ten day regime of antibiotics, probiotics, pain medicine (which will most likely be flushed in a week since I do not like narcotics at all), and liquid diet for the time being (which, is cool with me. Been trying to lose some extra weight anyways lol). Scheduling an appointment with the dentist to check it out, do the scans and x-rays once the swelling and infection is done, and extraction of the damaged tooth. Apparently the work done to it was not enough and a root canal will no longer suffice. Time to yank that bitch and be done with her. Whatever. I had really bad hyperemesis gravidarum with 'Lette. So much so, it's still showing some issues almost two years later. Especially where it comes to my teeth and heart. It's fucking maddening as I take great care of my teeth and my body, but something like severe morning sickness for 7 months straight can ruin all of that.
Things they just don't warn you about with pregnancies, honestly.
I wanted a redo on the first week of September.
I have a lot of issues with my teeth because of my Sjogrens and chronic dry mouth. I am royalty because I have so my crowns. Tooth pain and the side effects are no joke. My hubby has had an issue recently with getting a temp crown and having his mouth hurt so much and feel like crap. Went for the permanent today. Now they want to wait a couple weeks to put the permanent glue on in case he needs a root canal. Ugh.
:( That is so hard, I am sorry he is going through that and that you have, as well.
It's sane how much oral health affects everything- and how expensive and time consuming it is.
I know all about the teeth stuff.... tooth pain can be some of the worst pain ever! I hope your week gets better quickly!
I have not slept yet. I finally got my youngest down at 12, did two loads of laundry and then at 0245 my youngest woke up disclaiming "all done!".
It is currently 0443 and I am brewing coffee and making cinnabuns.
Em gets up in two hours to start his day and routine for homeschooling.
I'm already tired. 🤣
Emerson will be learning the trombone this year. I pick up his instrument on Tuesday and my brother so graciously brought over a new desktop with a 27 inch monitor for him so he can Skype his instructor and learn it through there. He was really excited to be in band this year and between cancer treatments and then COVID hitting, he's missed out a lot on a bunch of things he wanted to get into and back into.
So it was only fair he gets private lessons this year in order to be up to date with starting band once he can go back to normal school.
His instructor studied at Juilliard and Berklee College of Music, then taught for a while at other institutes. This should be a great adventure for the kiddo.
Things not working in the appropriate manner as they should be. haha
Technology and I are not friends, it seems.
Welcome back though hope to catch up with you sometime :)
I love when that happens. The sarcasm is strong.
Interesting, I actually thought it was later in the week.
Egyptian day, for the kiddos. Learning all about Ancient Egyptians and their customs, cultures, and then this weekend we will do some food in style of the theme. Monday will be a project that reflects hieroglyphics and learning some other neat stuff about them. Em is really into this period right now, so that absolutely helps with keeping his interest.
I'm just going to start using my journal as random thoughts and what nots. Helps to declutter the mind. (:
Ohhhh we learned on that last year some... There are some really good programs on one of the streaming services... I can't recall which at the moment... Had to have been, Netflix, Hulu or Disney Plus... Just to throw that out there... maybe they are still there. :) (The hubby says he believes it was Disney Plus)
It's been an interesting last couple of years.
Em is now cancer free, has been since 1/31/2020. We do scans and labs every 6 months to make sure the cancer doesn't come back, as the one he has is a rare form and unfortunately can and often does in other forms. He just turned 11 in June. Still wrapping my head around the fact that he is a preteen now. Time is flying!
Scarlette will be two in December. Em loves being a big brother and has been teaching her new words. He absolutely lights up whenever she says what he's taught her in the proper context and she thrives around him. I've never seen two siblings be so comfortable around each other before. They do just about everything together and every time I try to tell him he can take time to himself he laughs and says "There is plenty of time to spend by myself when she decides she doesn't want to hang out with her big bro anymore!" ♥
I start school for funeral services on 10/4. Finally going after the degree to become a Mortician. My husband recently asked me what I always wanted to do and when I expressed that I've wanted to be a mortician since I was four, he looked at me and asked me what was stopping me from pursuing it now?
Nothing. Nothing is. So I am now enrolled to start in October.
Em is being homeschooled this year. With the idiot running this state and the morons that don't understand basic science and health, it is not safe for an immunocompromised child who cannot safely social distance to attend a brick and mortar school. Plus, he's already showing growth from being taught from home. I have realized the last year and a half the teachers have literally just pushed these kids through without much instruction. When I spoke with the dean of instruction at the middle school, she was wicked relieved that I chose to homeschool as the mass majority of the students entering sixth grade are not at the sixth grade level academically due to COVID and the teachers being so overwhelmed that instruction just didn't happen correctly last year and everyone is in remedial classes. They had to hire extra teachers just for the remedial classes. So he is getting the 1:1 instruction he needs in order to be right where he needs to be for his grade level now. Between missing school days the year before COVID due to chemotherapy treatments then COVID hitting right after- there was some work to do. I am just glad I've always been proactive in his education so he's not as behind as his peers, but still more behind than I was fully aware of as his teacher last year did not fucking communicate appropriately with me regarding his school work and lessons. Even though I asked every single week. Bah. So fucking annoying!
Doing lots of house repairs on the home we purchased in 2019. After the storm hit Dallas, we had to replace the entire fucking plumbing system. I was on a murderous streak that whole fucking month. Previous owners did not disclose (and trust and believe I ASKED) if the piping was outdated. Everyone said it was practically new and the piping was correct.
Come to find out, they only replaced what they could see from removing the skirting. Some of the piping was PVC piping that hasn't been replaced in about 15 years. So it all shattered during the storm. It wasn't even insulated. I was SO angry. Replacing parts of the roof next, redoing the kitchen cabinets, sink, and countertops. We releveled the house, redid the skirting, still need to redo the driveway, but that will come with time. Recently got a new stove, fridge, and washer and dryer. Redid the living on my birthday (red and black and lots of spooky décor, heh), finished painting the exterior of our house fully black (including sidewalks and porch), and planting lots of stuff. Next is the bathroom, Emerson's room, and then our room last. Scarlette's room is already complete. Only reason Em's isn't is because he is still deciding on the full theme he wants on it. All we know is it will be an outer space theme, he hasn't narrowed down exactly what he wants just yet, though.