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How would any of you raise kids in a vampire family? How old before you'd explain what the vampire lifestyle is, and what resources would you use?

MM2

it depends on if they are also vampire or not and if they are awakening yet or not.

LOL,i dont think the child would know any diffrence untill he or she is at least 9 or 10 years old,then they will ask questions,but i'd say don't really tell them anything that can give them major nightmares untill they are at least 14.
i know that my big sis,is raising a child in her vampire family,and it seems to be going very well.how does any race of beings raise children?
this question is somthing that cant be explained good enough for massive conversation.
Or maybe it's just me.heh.

Maybe start them off watching a lot of old "Adams Family" and "The Munsters" episodes... get them used to the idea?

See I thought Vampyre (not vampire) had the distinction or ideal of Awaking , so with that in mind how would a "vampire" tell an adult what makes them a vampire, seeing how Vampyres are quite open about their ideals. The line is so blurry one could only suspect a child would never stop hearing all the variations. A parent would have to distingissh themselves clearly.

probably before they go to school, as it might cause some harvoch around the playground and classes

Best just prepare them early for a life of lies, friendlessness, and eventual suicide, for lying to them from an early age about vampirism.

Kids understand make-believe, and lifestylers are not known to think they are Ancient Monsters of lore.

"Mommy sips peoples blood."

Get off it, what, trying to intimidate the wee child.

All joking aside, kids should be explained things to in an age-appropriate manner. You shouldn't expect an infant to understand an 'alternative' lifestyle but a teenager could have a good understanding if based on their age and stage of development, parents give an honest account of their chosen lifestyle. The parents need to allow the teenager to make their own choices and not impose their beliefs selfishly upon them with no thought to psychological or physical harm. The level of maturity of the child is key.

I also would add that not just age appropriate but when making that kind of decision gauge the maturity of the individual child, every one is different and everyone can handle different ideas at different times and some people are never ready to know certain things.

wait til puberty and then again it would be easy after the child is 8

Most of us didn't choose what lifestyle we were brought up into but most certainly, it doesn't really matter. It might effect a child for a certain period of time but ultimately, children will be socializing and learning about OTHER lifestyles anyway which molds them into being even more curious about what they are being taught and how THEY are living as well. More than likely if a child brings up the fact they are raised in a vampire community, others will probably look at them strangely OR want to know more about what that means. I don't think age matters so much as HOW the parents goes about trying to help them understand what it means, and when to be open and not be open about it to others. Give them some sensible and realistic answers and of course let them decide what it is they want to do from there. As for what resources? If they are certain they wanted to be part of it, i would just teach them from my own personal experiences.

I would teach my children that they should not feel pressured to do something just because I do it.

I personally believe that a child is very easily influenced. I feel that this term awakening is one that ppl use to freely but do not understand the word. Awakening is a point when u realize that u are an ascending being. The psychic abilties of the third eye or pineal gland being awakened. This is something that in a child is on their own level and cannot be rushed over some concept of born or not born. Everyone has the ability to awaken their third eye it is not something that is given to someone. The alighenment of the chakras from base to crown is an ancient belief. One that is even mentioned in the books jahira, bellah and calmae. Spiritual evolution is something that is at ones own pass and discovery. But if the family is to ignorant to believe it's some title of anything other then a spiritual ascending and evolution then we need to wake up people.

I'm sorry if anyone takes offense

I think I'd go with the age appropriate answers, go slow. Another problem not discussed here, the good old SS (AKA Child Protective Services, or DCFS). Now depending on where you are, what kind of state you are in you may have to deal with these nosy people. I have had friends in the community who lost custody of their children because of the negative views of the Goth and Vampire community in Va.

In one case, the SS worker came into his home (with no warrant) asked to take his books on vampirism. He said no, and she took them anyway, along with his guns (which he purchased and kept legally). I advised him to call the police and have her charged with theft. He never did get his property back, and was thus deprived of his 1st and 2nd amendment rights without due process. They would never have taken a bible out of the home.....

In another case a child was removed from a home, both parents were goths, because the SS worker suspected they were vampires! They are still fighting to get their child back!

First up, educate yourself. Know your rights. Some SS workers will show up with the police at your door to try to intimidate you. You have a 4th amendment right to tell them to go and get a warrant. You have a 5th amendment right not to answer any of their questions. Best advice is to keep the chain on your door, open it just enough to invoke your 4th and 5th amendment rights and hand them your attorney's card. That is usually the end of it.

Yes but the sad part of that is that the SS person would've won either way because if the man in question had made a legal fuss she could've just turned the media circus on him and made him out to be some sort of weirdo.

Ate this is true. They've already conjured enough of media attention due to kids running around murdering and all that jazz. Honestly if ppl know they would either dismiss it orcall an authority with worry. Personally you can't Blame them for their worry. When children are involved it becomes a different story.

I am a old soul and so is my five year old; she came to me and said she is a vamipre, I say I don't know. Old soul yes; she as seen her grandparents from beyound. She knows what mom is but I never push my believes on her, she's to young.

well 5 years old is really young, what can we say about a person how do we distinguish what is real and what is pretend I mean if i 5 year old boy gets into the closet and dresses in mommies clothes people seeing this rarely call him a cross-dresser they say he is playing pretend.

So just tell the kids parents are way more serious about their play pretend!

dabbler,

You do realize that you would have to wait till the kid(s) are old enough right?

and I would consider not bringing it up if you know your children wouldn't like the idea, not everything has to be shared.

kids would figure it out long before being told, it is just people are naive to how acceptable children are about make believe, they don't take things as serious as adults begin to. So what it is is make believe, and I have yet to see anything to to convince me otherwise. ( Well one exeption, and a child would be ready to learn that around high school plus age.)

Honestly, it is very difficult to raise a family that is going to actually stay together these days. Adding what "type" of family you want to raise to that equation is perhaps a bit naive.

why? many people do.

It is not like anyone has anything substantial to even tell a child, as I see it adults don't even know what they think, the whole lot are stuck in their heads.

it just seems rather peculiar to want to pass a delusion onto ones off spring, how desperate can people be..

"Well son, it's time you knew.. I'm a vampire, and your going to inherit it."

Ego pure grandiose!

There is a book here somewhere I know it.

I'm just saying, it's a bit naive to assume that you can raise a "vampire" family when, the majority of families split over finances.

I'm not saying it absolutely can't be done. I'm just saying that there are way bigger issues.

You know, you could always just treat them like a person and talk to them directly about it.

Just a thought.

I agree Mobius. Kids are usually able to make their own minds up if what you tell them is done in such a way so as they both understand it and its appropriate for their age. Of course if the beliefs you have are extreme, then consider their needs before your own. Kids do get bullied if they have lifestyles that are very different from their peers and if the parents have beliefs that are extreme, or far from the 'norm' then sometimes it isnt good to 'force' them to follow what you believe.

I told my son the in's and out's of what i do , but he doesn't take any notice of me . He's only six , if i say i;am a vampire , he chases me round the house with a bit of wood trying to stake me . I might as well say i'am a killer robot from the future sent back to destroy mankind , he just see's it all as a game . Which is how it should be in a childs mind , nothing should be taken to seriously when their little . Maybe when he's older he'll wrap his head round it more .

I don't think that a six year old would actually try to stake his parents a 13yr old might though again this goes back to the background of the individual and then your cultural background.

A good question..

As we know a kids level of awareness and learning developes from an early age. and they learn a lot more then a a teen in middle school.. All the questions they ask they are exploring and broading their horizen's and sights of learning.

as for when I would tell some one about my child being a vampire. I would say 6 because 6 is the ideal time to tell kids and show them things and teach them morality and resonsbility. and will avoid any uncomfortable sictuations.. Later on in life for the child.. and to teach them how to control their feelings and concerns. and teach them every thing a vampire does. about the thrist. and their abilities.

But also teach them responsiblity.. ie.. and some of you may laugh at this. but it would'nt be a laughing matter if it became a public thing. as we know all vampire's can climb wall's or walk upside down on celling's as well as jump over things. not to mention the strenght of the vampire..

All that could cause trouble.. So teach them moraility of using their powers/skills accordingly with out showing off to draw attention to them from the wrong people ie such as slayers and hunters..

This protecting the child and the family and keeping them safe from the wrong crowds of people whom may also be out to exploite our children.. As we all know the world is not a nice place and that as parents is our role to teach our children all of this so keeping them all safe..

And that we are up holding the way of the vampire to remain in the shadow. as the shadows are our allies and the world still isn't ready for us..

And I am a non vampire. but that is my view on things.. Correct me by all means if you think I am wrong.

I didn't mean that six was a bad age to tell your kids, just that I don't think a lot of kids would try to kill there parents for something like that at the age of 6.

He might chase you with a sharp stick, but at least you have set the basic foundation for him to learn.

Which is, not avoiding it and sheltering him from life like he will never be able to handle it. Now as he gets older, that understanding will change from a cartoonish response to an inquisitive one with empathy and comprehension.

yes i agree, sheltering your kids will only backfire onto you.

everyone raises their kids differntly...
Just keep your feeding habits away from your
kids until you feel they are ready to learn...
each child is differnt...
but I mean.... there's just some things
you should keep away from your kids anyways...

They do tend to mimic their parents...
so cutting people in front of your 5 year old is ...
unwise to say the least.

Plus they really like to brag about their parents to other kids.. so unless people want a visit from CPS then I would adhere to discretionary practices. The only reason I can think of why a person would be so desperate to tell their child would be that the person themselves is immature.

I subscribe to the belief that minor children should not be involved in the practice of vampirism, this includes children of parents who are vampyres. There is no reason for the subject of the physical act of involved in vampyre practice to be explained to your children. They may become drawn to the fictional vampire in the media and that would be where they become interested. A parent may encourage spiritual and philosophic study of pertinent information which may build a platform to launch discussion and explanation of the vampyre mysteries with the child when they are no longer a minor.
Some may question why I think this is the best thing to do for the parent and children, however there are primarily legal and ethical reasons for my choice. If not for these reasons I would advocate children may begin their study around 15 or 16 years old.
Being a vampyre parent may be a legal liability due to the nature of having belief in such a controversial lifestyle, which may draw attention from neighbors and teachers of children in school. Such attention may draw the attention of Child Protective Services and other undesirable elements into a parents and child's private life and cause traumatic harm to both.
To send a child to school with the knowledge of their parents vampyric lifestyle may precipitate verbal or physical attacks by peers should the innocent child speaks of their family "religion" to other children. There is a tendency of children to bully those they feel are different and sensitive.

well I think that if you want to keep your vampire life separate from your family life then I would recommend that you don't advocate your life for fear it will adversely influence your children

I'm an educator... I know... the pity of it all! I also live a lifestyle that is NOT conducive to mainstream education. In spite of the so called legal protections out there, I risk my job if I expose myself to far.

Having said that, tell your children and raise them to be different. Society, from the media to the education system, tells kids that being different means being wrong. Look at the suicides among gay young people for any proof you need.

How do you do it? By living it. You are the model for your children. Introduce them to your friends, show them the films, the books, the web sites (this one!). Most importantly... talk to them! Communicate... it works wonders.

If they're not interested... let them find their own path... as long their minds are open they'll be fine...

Well, I for one have children so this question is very interesting to me.

For me I would wait until my children ask about why we live the way we do. Depending on there age at the point of asking I would limit what was told. If the question had not came up with my children I would tell them about our lifestyle when they turn the age of 17 reason 17 is because where I live 17 is considered an adult.

The resourses that I would use would be news articles and books about the truth of vampire's and so on.
I forgot what I was saying..eh oh well.

It's very sad that certain people instead of adding to the discussion spend their time belittling other people's beliefs and values to make themselves superior.

I keep my heartache and disability from my kids. If one of them ever asks me about me... I imagine I'll come clean.

hmmmmm I have repeatedly obsessively wondered the very same thing... I do not believe there is a clear cut answer for everything except what is right for your circumstance... and even if what you choose is not considered "right" it is all a learning and growing experience non the less... as far as mine are concerned... we have our own little family jokes and such... and the rest is left up to them to discover for themselves and whatever questions they come up with I will do my best to answer in an honest age appropriate way lol... should be fun ; )

Okay I for one know children are a lot smarter then some people may believe. A bit naive, yes, but that can be changed by simply explaining to them the difference between fact and fiction. Consider this: Christian religions teach children from birth baptizing them and even schooling them early about the faith they were born into. Jewish are the same, in fact, most religions are like that. I think that the Mormons, though in my opinion, they are very deluded in many ways, got a few very important things right.

Raise them in the faith teach them the difference between discretion and shame. Do a lot of family activities that are non-threatening. Teach them what it means early from birth if you can. Family activities are soooooooo very important, it really helps them understand that it's not like the media would say and not something you share with ignorant close-minded individuals. Also teach them to know the difference between the close-minded and the open and apply it.

At the age of 8 have a ceremony for them where they can make an educated decision on whether it is or not they feel like they are part of it or one of us. Then have one every year after to make sure they truly share the characteristics and ideals of the vampyre/vampire lifestyle they must always know they have a choice. Address any and all questions with honest, strait forward answers, this prevents confusion. If they show an interest elsewhere nurture it and give them the tools to learn and grow as an individual and the strength to stand up for themselves against ignorance.

That is how I feel on this subject.

DSI