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What do you know about lonelieness? What do you know about despair? What do you know about my heart?



Just go... please just go.

Had a lovely Thanksgiving with a great group of folks. Didn't feel the least bit sad or blue, which is something new. Holiday's have been hard in the past, but I think it's truly a new era in my life. I've taken the control I've always had and just never exercised. I spend my Holidays with whom ever I choose not people who make me feel like I have to spend it with them.



I still wish New Orleans had worked out, but now I think I'm gonna shoot for New Years!

Happy Thanksgiving to all my fellow ravers! I hope that today is day of good cheer, good food, and good company for each and everyone of you. Don't forget to contimplate on all that you are grateful for.



I'm grateful for my son, always for him, I'm grateful that I have so much, despite losing everything; I'm thankful for my VR family, and the list goes on.



What are you thankful for today?

Holy crap! Had a mini panic attack because I thought I'd left my thumb drive in a public computer! Too much personal stuff on there to leave it laying around. Must be more careful in the future.

I love full moons and the days just before and after them... usually they put me in a wonderful mood. I'm feeling down in the mouth today though... I feel like say stupid shit like... well just stupid shit.

Why is it that women have to withstand the prejudice of other people's opinions. It sometimes seems like fatism is the most acceptable form of prejudice and hate. I mean since when was it a crime to be plus sized? Why does being fat negate a woman's humanity?



Everything in this universe comes in all different shapes and sizes including, men and women. Beauty is not a size, worth doesn't weigh more or less, sex appeal isn't a twig, wrapped in expensive rags.



We all have an ugly, shallow side, we all succumb to a very human reaction of being cruel and unkind to others in our thoughts and sometimes in our deed, but what makes us better or worse is our conscious decision to give in to that part of ourselves or to strive to rise above it and be better than that.



fat does not equal ugly



fat does not equal unworthy



fat does not equal less than human



fat does not equal stupid





Jeez people... as Ellen always says... "Be kind to one another."

just saw a profile that showed alot of skin... more skin than I really cared to see, but then I had to be honest with myself and wonder if the person had been super hot would I have had that reaction... as much as I don't want to admit it, I'd have to say that I probably would have just drooled and moved on, but since this person wasn't exactly a 10 I was shocked... I guess we're always a work in progress... at least this person is comfortable enough with themselves to flaunt it and feel sexy. I sure can't say the same for myself.

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Morrigon
02:00 Nov 19 2010

Hehe I don't think there is anything wrong with how it makes you feel... What matters more is how you react.



I remember seeing a picture of a man in a speedo on here. WOAH!



But... More power to him haha

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oy, bad attitude day. got an attitude with my boss for no good reason. i guess everything is just catching up to me... you know?



i've been through alot this year and i've done my best to keep my chin up and be nice through it all, but sometimes i just have to let the bitch in me free.



hopefully i didn't really screw up with my boss and she'll forgive and forget. if not then so be it.



sometimes if just wanna scream FUCK MY LIFE!!!!

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PandorasBx
13:17 Nov 18 2010

Lets hope next year is better ..

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Was late for work, boss was mad, so I brought her a coke, then she was not so mad, still acting weird though... hmmmm... I wish I knew what I do that always seems to annoy her... and don't say being late, cause I'm usually never late.



Anyway... did some shopping... some tv watching... now some raving.

So Mr. Kitty who was declawed long before he came to live with us finally caught our resident mouse and terminated him. The mighty hunter is stalking around the house twitching his tail and crowing like he's all that and a bag of chips... or maybe he's just looking the mouse carcass I confiscated from him earlier.

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TheRat
03:18 Nov 15 2010

:) Extra petting for being a killer, I say.

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So its a good thing when you work with people who won't let you stay blue for very long. Lucky me!

Just got word that my Grandmother died. She was never very Grandmotherly and she really wasn't very nice, but I loved her and admired her. I'll miss you Grandma.

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Anachronism
02:56 Nov 14 2010

Thoughts are with you and your family.

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Let's see... late morning meeting with the ladies. Some half-assed house work... I just wasn't feeling it. Now I'm making up a bread pudding recipe as I go... we'll see how that one turns out. Then later tonight me and the boy are going to check out some good music.



Life is good.



Oh and I have successfully worked out my aggression and no longer feel the need to murder horrible little 11 year olds!

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Requiem
22:33 Nov 13 2010

I have a FABULOUS bread pudding recipe. It was my daddy's mother's. If you would like it, let me know. =)

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Vampirewitch39
23:24 Nov 13 2010

Hope it turns out well, and glad your anger is under control.

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Have I mentioned I'm mad? I'm so consumed with rage at this moment that I would just love it if someone broke into my home right now, just so I would have an excuse to beat the shit out of somebody.



What happened to my son today disturbs me so much and makes me so angry, I can't even see straight.



I've always said I'd kill anybody who hurt my son... I just didn't think about the fact that those sombodies might be kids too.

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ladySnowStrixx
03:24 Nov 12 2010

I,m sorry hun, have you thought about talking to the parents about it and telling them if it doesn't stop you will have charges taken out.

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birra
03:30 Nov 12 2010

So, they can suspend or expell a student for bringing advil or a toy gun to school.. but actual harm being done passes under a blind eye?



Ahhh.. the more things change, the more they stay the same.



One of the problems I have with the education system... they talk a good game but when it comes to actually taking action against real problems, they suck.

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ImageMaker
04:02 Nov 12 2010

I agree Birra, the education system is in serious trouble. However they're on their own from here on out. I'll teach my son at home from here on out.

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PAGAN
12:37 Nov 12 2010

I agree that schools talk a good talk but fail to implement their plans adequately on bullying. Lets face it, if the school had an efficient anti-bullying programe, the bullying would happen much less often. Hope your son manages to find some sort of positive closure, you being a good parent will help him lots.

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My son is being bullied at school, and it has gotten to the point where he has stopped participating in things he loves to do. I feel so angry and helpless...

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Anachronism
22:02 Nov 11 2010

:( I hope the situation improves.

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birra
23:00 Nov 11 2010

If you know who is doing it, we can order a hit...



...hey, accidents happen.

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fallenangel51
23:28 Nov 11 2010

Yeah what birra said...



sounds like its time someone gets the crap smacked out of them.

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PandorasBx
00:48 Nov 12 2010

Children can be so cruel to one another, I feel so bad for your son *huggles*

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PAGAN
12:32 Nov 12 2010

bullying is horrible, hope your son gets support at school for it.

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Dude, I'm in a funk this morning. Just chilling waiting for the little man to get off to school so I go back to bed, crawl under the covers and sleep off this silly little case of the blues.

Its good to remember that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I recently caught some flack for a girl i went on a couple of dates with. Everyone was like... "Her? Really?" and I'd ask "What?" and their response was always something like "Nothing... just not what I pictured." Finally one friend had the balls to be honest and say that the girl was just kind of funny looking.



Well, I do remember when I first met her that there might have been a fleeting thought at the oddness of her appearance. She's not ugly but she's not conventionally pretty either, but she's beautiful to me. And when I see her I get a warm fuzzy.



We're not dating anymore, but that has nothing to do with her, I'm just not into commitment and romantic relationships. I'm addicted to the flash and the bang of initial romance and attraction. We're still great friends though, and she's still hot to me.



It's a beauty that shines from the inside and its worth more to me than any amount of hotness on the outside.

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Alastriona
21:55 Nov 08 2010

I agree with you completely. We should all stop and look inside of people first before we judge by outward appearances.

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Brie
18:04 Nov 10 2010

I agree with what that

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Good Gawd, I'm tired! Party turned out well and so did the cake. Trick-o-treating was exhausting. I love Halloween and though I sort of want to say I'm glad it's over the truth is I kind of wish it wasn't.

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PandorasBx
08:32 Nov 01 2010

Glad it all turned out the way you wanted :) I know what you mean about being exhausted though, my kid wore me out ugggh.

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