Their first mistake was believing my days had to be Awesome for me to be also...No, not so much. Awesomeness is a state of mind.
In the art of war it is taught to always have a Plan B. Why? Because of Murrphy's Law and the intent of your Enemy.
Plans do not always produce the desired results and an adversary seeks always to discover and exploit your perceived weaknesses. So when your first plan fails do to natural unforeseen forces or the enemy makes it difficult to execute your first plan, then execute your alternate plan. Your Plan B.
So it is in life in general. Life will happen and people will watch you, study your life, look for any weakness and then go "Ha, see that, he/she is not so perfect after all." Life events will seem to knock you down and people, well when their negative talk about you isn't enough, they may go out of their way to do you harm out of envy. Therefore, always have a Plan B. Know your next move.
One might ask themselves, why is life so hard? Well life adheres to the Yin Yang Principle. It can't be all perfect all the time nor can it be all hellish all the time.
One might ask themselves, why do Haters Hate? Well human nature, it seems, has always been about not wanting to be less than anyone, not being content with being equal to anyone, but always having the desire to be better than someone. There is Envy/Jealousy in the hearts and minds of many. But a wise person understands that they are not competing with anyone, but themselves.
So let life run its course and let others spend their wasted energy studying you while you spend your energy Enjoying Life and executing your Plan B when need be.
Maybe I am but a drop of water in a vast ocean, but I do respect the ripples I make. ^_^
Just finished watching 'The Equalizer' staring Denzel Washington. Moral of the story is if you have the skills and/or the means to help someone in need, either it is in your character to do so, or it is not.
Your result for The Nerd? Geek? or Dork? Test...Pure Nerd
52 % Nerd, 35% Geek, 26% Dork
Shout out to all the cool people who use their shower as a bidet...
She said that love is hurting. I said that love doesn't hurt people, people hurt people. She said that she didn't say love hurts, she said love is hurting. I asked what did she mean? She said that she is love walking the Earth in flesh and until she sees me in person, love is hurting.....Then I woke-up.
So I asked her, how can I be heartless when every time I look at her, I can feel it skip a beat? How can I be heartless when every time she's sad, I can feel it breaking just a little more? She said maybe I'm sensing it more than feeling it because I must be heartless after giving my heart to her a long time ago....Well played little lady...Well played.
Reasons Why Hermit Couples Are Better Than Party Couples:
Party couples never know if it's the distraction of their wild social life that keeps them together, while hermit couples have nothing but themselves to love.
Hermit couples have the same priorities; to stay in, cuddle, snack, and have sex.
You save a lot of money on club entry fees and drinks, and instead spend time enjoying each other.
You don't have to shout over tons of strangers to tell her she's beautiful.
You remember the night before so the morning after is much more romantic, and minus the hangover.
The best part is that you won't be too foggy headed to remember the love making.
You can wear your comfy pajama pants and you're feet won't hurt in the morning from wearing 4 inch stilettos.
And the cherry on top of being a hermit couple, you don't have to wait to get home to have sex. You can do it whenever the mood strikes, and over and over again.
Have you ever noticed that the majority of Hip Hop/Rap music, the artists and many of the Action/Sci-Fi movies or the actors when searched with the word 'Illuminati' can be found on the internet? Seriously? I suppose EVERYTHING is controlled by us..umm...them. smh.....LOL!
I remember when I was in High School how I would go home, do my home work and then shut myself up in my room away from the world a listen to Jazz and Love Songs on the radio. Serenity has always been my goal, but I knew it would take a career of Blood, Tears and Guts to achieve it. Well look at that, I did it! ^_^
I would do that too and my mom would always ask me how could I focus when that music on. But I did. Since I was a B student she would never make me turn it off. Music has always relaxed me. Calmed my mind. And I can say too I am the path you took. Hard work for that end result to one day kick back and do what I want to do and have the money to do it.
So in the past I've asked a few female friends if they would like to move our relationship beyond just friends and have been told in so many words, 'no thanks'. Hey, I respect that. I'm thinking their loss...even if it wasn't. LOL!
However, unlike me who can move on, this is a challenge for some.
When you reach that point where you have to 'Unfriend' someone who wouldn't take a hint nor 'Real Talk', it's sad.
Yeah, I've done it. I shouldn't have had to, but she tried to force her affections for me on me thinking that my feelings towards her would some how change. Listen, there is no 100% easy way to tell someone you're just not interested in them beyond friendship (as if that's such a bad thing to have these days) when they obviously have an interest beyond friendship in you, but after telling them nicely trying to not hurt their feelings while at the same time leaving their ego and self-esteem intact and they still want to try to force the issue, that's when you have to bring the 'Real Talk' into action. Now if the 'Real Talk' doesn't work and only seems to turn them into a crazed stalker.....'Unfriend' and Block if necessary.
Listen, I get the fact that some females and society in general believes that The Power Of The Pussy Rules Everything when the guy is a Heterosexual......But don't believe the hype. There are a lot of females in this world and I'm pretty sure they all have vaginas too. I just happen to not want some vaginas because they are attached to the following people: a person living in a location that is too far away with no plans to relocate locally anytime soon and hopefully not just for me, a friend that is married or currently in an intimate relationship, having the type of personality that I can't see myself having to deal with 24/7 and I'm searching for a full-time lover, having a physical appearance that isn't easy on my eyes, having a mentality that is questionable, and/ or living a lifestyle that is not compatible with my own.
So to keep friends from getting their feelings hurt, I simply state my preference since we all have them. So if friends know what I'm looking for and they're not it....
So a friend and I was discussing the term 'Unconditional Love'. This was, by coincidence, after I made a post about believing only a Parent can have it for their child as I have for my Son only.
Then another friend and I got into the same type of discussion over the term "Agape Love". I don't feel it reaches the level of "Unconditional Love" either; even when speaking about their deity. I said, I mean no disrespect to their faith, but as long as there is a Hell or Lake of Fire, Rules or Commandments to follow and Forever Damnation as a result of not following those rules and let's not forget there is a type of Sin that will not be Forgiven, then I see no example of 'Unconditional Love' from their deity. Of course there is all sorts of examples in their religious book's Old Testament of acts towards humans that could not be defined as "Love" by any stretch of the imagination.
So let's break this down.
What is 'Love'?
(1) A feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend.
(2) A profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person to include sexual passion or desire.
What is meant by the word 'Conditional Love'?
(1) Love is 'given' or 'taken away' 'earned' or 'lost' on the basis of conscious or unconscious conditions being met by the one that loves.
(2) The state of something, especially with regard to its appearance, quality, or working order. One's 'actions' that satisfies a list of requirements or achieves a "desired state". A reason to Love or simply making a choice exercising free will.
What is meant by the word "Unconditional Love'?
(1) Not subject to any "condition" or "requirement" or "desired state". Wholehearted, unqualified, unreserved, unlimited, unrestricted, unmitigated, unquestioning;
(2) Nothing is expected in return. Will not stop 'No Matter What'.
So my point is as long as there are Commandments, Rules, Vows, Morals, Limits, Boundaries, etc, etc, by the very definition of these, "Conditions" have been set.
If I was a Judge and Jury of a community and my Son disrespected me, said he hated me, spit in my face and then went out and conducted mass murder of our citizens, I may still choose to love my Son because he is of my flesh and blood and the baby I cared for in his younger years, the one who is here due to my actions, but yet I would have to lock him away for his own safety and the safety of others or even award the punishment of Death if that is the Law, but Eternal Torture while being Punished without the release of Death....Nahhh! That's not "Unconditional Love"
Loving ONLY those who Love You and Keep YOUR Commandments...Is NOT "Unconditional Love"
I think we use the term "Unconditional" very, very lightly out of fear that we know as humans we will make a mistake or bad choice and hurt the one we claim to love while at the same time not wanting to be held accountable for our own actions resulting in abandonment. So we say we want someone who can love us 'Unconditionally".
When it comes to an Intimate Relationship between a couple....There is NO WAY I will EVER believe that a person can't commit some type of Negative Action towards the other and not fall out of that person's grace.
Let someone with a child claim to have "Unconditional Love" for another then that person does something unforgivable to that person's child to include rape, torture and murder and then tell me with tears in their eyes how they still LOVE that person.......I'll buy them a sandwich!
Unconditional Love for another person that isn't one's child....WTF Ever...Gone with that BS.
I went over 4 years last month on this site and I just noticed it tonight. LOL!
I've been on FB way longer, but what keeps me attached to certain social sites are the Entertainment and Functionality of the site.
Why did I become a Life Time Member of VR? The Entertainment (some Bat-Shit Crazy People on this site) and the Journal Function (I can Blog, Add Pics & Videos). Of course there are more features I do enjoy about VR, but those are my top two.
So I do a lot of reading and formulate my own thoughts on things.
So it is known that Depression is when we focus on the Past.
We know Anxiety is when we focus on the Future.
There is not one single thing we can do to change one second of our Past so Depression is our own Choice to suffer and feel the negative energy that we generate from bad memories of guilt or sorrow.
But there is so much we can do in the attempt to better our Future. However, human nature throws in a few obstacles one of which is called FEAR.
Fear of trying and failing.
Fear of struggling the entire time then dying never having achieved all of our goals.
Fear of death.
I don't have all the answers, but I do know that if we allow Fear to cause us to lose Hope, we are as good as dead anyway.
One can't pay bills with Hope. One can not eat Hope when one is starving. One can not move into Hope and feel safe and protected from the elements. One can not wear Hope when one has no clothes.
However, HOPE inspires us to Never Give Up. To Keep Trying. To Keep Fighting. To Keep trying to make things Better. To Keep Wanting to see what Tomorrow May Bring. To Keep Looking for a Solution to a Problem. HOPE over comes FEAR. Hope gives us the Courage to Act. To Do Something. Anything!
Never lose HOPE!
Cheez-It baked snack crackers and Sweet Tea.....In my zone!
I'm not a God
But I am a Lord
Some days I'm a King
But always a Pharaoh
I'm not Crazy
But I am Eccentric
Some days I'm Excellent
But most days I'm Awesome
I'm not Lazy
But I am Retired
Some days I want more knowledgeable
But everyday I seek more Wisdom
I'm not Rich
But I am Wealthy
Some days I wear clothes
But most days I'm nude
I'm not a Witch
But I am a Warlock
Some days I feel the fact that I'm alone
But I never feel Lonely
I'm not a Christian
But I am a Pagan
I may not be your cup of Coffee
But I am somebody's glass of Tea
~ And Forever Lord MOGY
On being SELFISH....
So in a conversation where members contributed their opinions on what is the biggest contributor to failing relationships, my contribution was of a person being 'Selfish'.
Selfish is defined as a person, action, or motive lacking consideration for others; concerned chiefly with one's own personal profit or pleasure.
It is human nature to look after one's own self right? The question is if one doesn't, who will? At certain times one has to place themselves first in order to be a help to others. But how does this relate to interdependence in relationships?
Interdependence is defined as being mutually reliant on each other. Wikipedia goes on to state in an interdependent relationship, participants may be emotionally, economically, ecologically and/or morally reliant on and responsible to each other.
Therefore I submit that in interdependent relationships, for one or both partners to lack consideration for the other and concerned chiefly with one's own personal profit or pleasure, will result in a lack of emotional, economical, ecological and/or moral support contributing to the deterioration of an intimate relationship.
Furthermore, one can not play the "victim" accusing the other partner of being selfish when they themselves are guilty of failing to satisfy the known needs and desires of the other. At the moment one partner takes their focus off the other partner and focuses only on themselves, this will result in a feeling of abandonment by the other partner which will cause the other partner to go into self-preservation mode focusing only on themselves as well.
End the end no acts of kindness will be done for the other without the expectation of "pay-back" nor will acts of kindness be done if the other person has not done anything for the other as a method of scoring is established. As the lyrics to the song by Janet Jackson goes..."What Have You Done For Me Lately?"
I woke up at 2 a.m. and it seems I blinked and it was 5 a.m. Someone stole 3 hrs of my life, but they can have them I wasn't using them anyway. I'm RETIRED!!! ^_^
My 3rd Ex-Wife who lived with Chronic Depression once accused me of being "forcefully happy". Meaning that when I saw that she wasn't happy, I would ask her to talk about her feelings or I would go about ensuring that she is in an environment that should be conducive to bringing about happiness. However, if all fails and she remains depressed, I didn't go into a depress state with her instead I continue my happy mood which I suppose either forced her to be happy too or fake being happy or she felt even more depress because she couldn't explain why she was depressed. She even started medication, but their was negative side-effects and she didn't want to go through more until the right one was found. So she simply completed school, left me and married someone else who thought she was a happy person.
The thing is I spent years learning and perfecting control over my emotions. Much like the fictional vampires on the Vampire Diaries, it seems that I can actually turn them on or off at will. I rarely allow the actions of another to get me to the point of "anger". It doesn't mean I'm happy about their actions, it means I don't have the desire to cause them harm or express to them forcefully how displeased with their actions I am.
If ever I can't stay calm, then I feel I failed myself. I lost control. I try not to ever lose control. Even when some people have confessed to actively trying to make me lose control because they hate that I have so much control over my own emotions, I still don't let that type of childishness bother me.
I remember losing control for 30 seconds back in 2009. Something ended up broken. An inanimate object that wasn't even mine. I felt so bad about it. That was the last time I let myself go. It's not that I try to keep things bottled up inside either. I've got outlets that do purge negative energy from me. I'm not saying I'm happy 24/7 either, but when I'm not, most would never know.
Military training, Martial Arts training, Meditation, Occult Studies and sometime deciding to just not Give-A-Fuck all contributes to my ability to master my own emotions.
I must ask, does mastering one's emotions translate into simply not allowing others to know what you are feeling?
I ask because I see that as a form of hiding one's true self. I'm quite interested in this point of view and wish to understand it further.
I find that the older I get, the calmer I am...almost to an 'I don't really give a fuck' attitude. Hell - it beats gettin' all riled up. I was kind of a hot head when I was young, even though I was more in control than not. I guess that's when I got the 'icy' tag. (Does that make sense)? lol
Anyway - military training and the other stuff you mentioned would make a person well-rounded, in my humble opinion.
Slain, mastering one's emotions does NOT mean one doesn't share their feelings, rather it means one can communicate their feelings in a more productive way without the drama of yelling or crying.
That I understand and agree with. I actually had misread a particular sentence. But yeah, I completely agree.