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S.O.S. That's same old shit. I look out at V.R. and what do I see now? How do people take the energy and use it for themselves? It's always the same routine. I guess it's a force of habit for them. But it's more like positive reinforcement. Yeah keep telling yourself that bullshit you'll believe it and just further warp your minds rather than changing for the better. Some here have some charisma too and then warp other minds and it just reinforces their own bullshit cause in reality they are merely attention whores doing whatever they can to get their next fix. You have to step back and look at things to really get a look at what's going on. You get all wrapped up in your work and don't appreciate it like you should. Come on pets don't you hear those cries for attention. There's egos that need to be stroked. lol.
See here's how things work for me. I get most of my influences from the occult realm then in tandem with my own thoughts express them here. Then I step and look what happens on V.R.. Now what do you think I see? A bunch of members getting in tizzy fits trying to mock and ridicule other to generate drama. I see now this is where they get their influences. Others don't realize that people are different than they are and their actions are just pitiful vain attempts to me. Like I've said my influences rarely are from physical things.
Some old Rush. Don't fuck with me I know quality. It could be something ancient, old or even newly minted. You just need the sophisticated refined mind to appreciate such things.
I remember ordering this survival knife when I was a teenager from the commissary of my Civil Air Patrol unit. It was what they issued pilots so if they get shot down behind enemy lines they got what they need to survive and it's extremely well made. I waited months for that to come in. Then I finally go to the supply officer on the night it came in. That fucking swindler said with a big smile on his face I think your going to like this and he pulls out some shiny new knife with a bunch of gadgets on it. Well It wasn't what I ordered and after waiting so long for limited edition thing I took the knife home wanting to try out the gadgets. That fucking shiny stainless steel and plastic piece of shit didn't last a week before it was broken and useless when what I ordered from the government would have lasted a lifetime with a high carbon steel blade. That fucking supply officer fucked me. I know he took my order then just went out and bought that shit he pawned off to me. Lesson learned. So it is even now I keep having to deal with the same skank ass motherfucking swindlers in different aspects of life trying to take advantage. I know what want and if I can't get it then I just make it myself. This is where I'm at now with other things in life because they are not available so I have to create it myself.
So many are on about the fake shit trying to sell it here on this site. Nope you can stick that shit up your ass. I want the authentic. There is no substitute like Tom Cruise said in the movie "Risky Business" when referring to a Porche. I have found just too much fake stuff on this site. Like cheap knock offs. So now I have to build the dynamic up into a matrix using the real quality parts that I can recognize and not compromise on. *sighs* Just like mom use to say you want it done right you got to do it yourself.
The problem I'm having is time. It's running out. I'm not getting any younger. I'm not going to be able to get the things I really want because so many have just wasted my time with their stupid head games but what little I am able to create will be the purest and most authentic I can manage. See I set things up not to get a lot of fake shit to deceive the mind. No quite the opposite I get the real very rare priceless artifacts. My referrals will be members that I've met in real life first. Feel free to test them that is what I want from vampire rave. It's like polish when bringing out the old silver.
@Bennu I'm no stranger to hard work. Actually when I do work I like to stick with temp agencies so I don't get obligated to stay permanently which places are tempted to hire me because of my work ethic. Don't make as much but it works for me and the lifestyle I choose to live. I'm kind of a modern day solitary gypsy and just like picking up and moving somewhere new.
Let me be clear about something and this is a blanket for everyone- I don't care if someone wants to smack talk me as a person or listen to people who spread gossip and misinformation about me (which was done and I know the telephone, tele-friend line that 'wheelchair' gossip was passed person to person to). I don't care if someone wants to give me negative honor or to rate me whatever they want to rate me. Those things are subjective person to person. These are things that members can do freely here. They are not against the rules. So, have at it. If choosing to do those things make your time more enjoyable, then go forth and enjoy. How a person chooses to act, conduct themselves, use the features of VR will play a part in a members user experience.
What I am not going to tolerate is the undermining of my position, another admin's position, Vampre Rave or Cancer. I will stick up for those things- no ifs, ands, or buts. Vampire Rave is a Cancer-tatorship. Which means if you don't like the way that Cancer chooses to run his site, then you can either go with the flow or find another social site that fits the experience you want.
Yeah that all sounds good but what the fuck does that have to do with the context of this matter? The reason given for rejecting the photo on stream was it represented a message to whoever was taking honor from me anonymously. So now this image is always represented to mean that is just pure bullshit and petty. Now you can lead the the conversation in a pointed manner to the conclusion that I'm undermining your authority. Did I bother them again about the matter. Nope just posted an appeal to the Prince who hasn't responded. I still have the opinion it was wrong and am free to express it. Am I taxing admin by flooding their inbox-no. I haven't spoken to them about it since. Once the Prince responds I'll consider the matter closed. Again how the fuck is that undermining authority? To me that's just leading a person there and trying to connect it to me.
Now I've been on VR off and on for over ten years and honestly don't remember where I heard about her being in a wheelchair but it seems plausible from that persons character. After I saw drama about a member in admin journals supposedly being accused of autorefreshing and they were cleared by Cancer I stopped reading them. But was there any apologies about that wrong assumption? No they try to save face and say it was shady and that person was just given a pass. So who was undermining Cancer's verdict in this regard? When you are wrong you admit it not hide as you are setting a bad example. What you think that supplants your authority being wrong so you hide it? In my world you admit it then learn from it. This matter concerns me because my main staple to level on V.R. is through the time spent score that I still have problems with because I get focused in my writing and go over the 5 minute mark and end up losing credit. I've literally lost years on this site without getting credit for it. But understand its a part of system to stop fraud of just leaving page open to increase score. I just literally lost 3 and 1/2 hours of spending time writing on this site during this log-on alone because of it. And this is the main way for me to level. I can't spam page views like some to power level as I recognize it defeats one of the main functions of the internet to use ads because you know it's money that makes the world go round and pays for it.
Now concerning this matter I'm still waiting to hear from Cancer. Sometimes it takes him a while to answer and I imagine if its about drama that's something he really doesn't want to deal with as a priority. But I did relay my position that I can see reason for original removal of it from stream but to say that image will always be used for the same reason is bullshit to me. I got it with the title in my premium file as Bats and the bees. Meaning it's a paraphrase from birds and the bees referring to sex talks. Now once he responds I'll consider the matter closed. I really don't need comments added to my journal by those trying to get attention to support their delusions that people like them about drama post that should be handled discreetly but can't because of blocks. Not that I'd expect it lest others be seen in opposition to the popular admin and other cliques on this site. I don't feel anything but peace in this matter. Not because I lie to myself like most do to deal with things and have others like yes men supporting them while removing dissenting remarks or blocking them.
So I have been blocked by the admin Regent. I have many blocks against me which is up to 39 now. Most were done to hurt me as I don't make it a habit of messaging many. Including that as well as to control the narrative it's a part of this site. If you can't deal with someone you have the right to block them. I don't personally do it as it's too much like censoring which I think is wrong unless in extreme cases like martial law during a crisis. Outside that I think it's best to deal with it by just ignoring it and not letting it get to you. Much like Cancer's radio show an element of this site is satire. Switching on a button that takes away that persons ability to express themselves just makes you weak. Especially if you are in an admin position and let them get to you shows you can't do your job objectively and it will affect your judgement. I think this site went to shit for many reasons as things tend to happen in cycles but one of the individual catalysts is such behavior of admins so people left. They may return but if that behavior persists they'll just leave again. I like this site and hope to use it in the future to test the loyalty and character of people I bring to it. I try to stay within guidelines of TOS. But if the Prince in accord with those terms deems me worthy of being kicked off the site he has the right to refuse service. I try to honor my word so can't get mad if he does no matter how much time and resources I invested. I plan to do a lot for this site but I will test things myself to see if it is worthy of all the sacrifices I will make. As it stands now I really only want to level my base score until I can sire out and create my own coven. Then I can work on the only "procurement" that matters to me as a vampire and that bringing real referrals here. All the other bonuses aren't of any value to me besides the mark of the Prince which I would want to be his choice rather than something bought. If that's not the case then I'll just carry on and use the service as I will. I don't need to be on this site to fulfill my word about beating Cancer's score of referral points. If you think seeing a bat's genitalia is a problem then wait as I can set links to this site from around the world wide web of the people of the sleaziest character to have you staring at human dick pics all day long as well as member of Law enforcement. Seeing members lose their internet privileges for the rest of their life is due compensation in my book for the shit that goes on here. Now as it stands now I just want to use the site to bring those interested in the vampire. But I have contingencies.
Something strange has happened as I've been updating my profile. My days work got stripped out and I had to resort to the back up. It happened once before under similar conditions when there was some adversity with an admin. But I can take it. Just know it's a two way street that I can make use of that befits me and my goals. I don't know if it done purposefully or just happens in subtle energies clashing from many wills colliding. Makes no difference as I tend to win out in the end no matter what the circumstances.
There's this scene from the movie Pulp Fiction that really sums up Vampire Rave to me. It's age restrictive so you cant play it here but if you're an adult with You Tube you can activate the image link and watch it there.
Bunch of deviant hillbillies really seem to have entrenched themselves here on this site because of risk involving minorities that they don't have on adult sites like Fetlife. If they want to be a little in age play that is the proper place for it not this site which is open to youth. Yes I understand some were abused as youth and now have those urges but that's the proper place for it to be whole not here. I think they're like ticks and the only way to deal with them is a smoldering match head to their ass to make them let go. But it has to be with invisible occult forces most can't fathom but through intuition that inspires awe or even terror in real vampires not unlike what any animal senses when a predator is near. There just seems to be a herd mentality that blinds them to this but it will be seen evident soon enough. Members here think everyone is like them that they become conditioned to enjoy suffering like in BDSM lifestyle and so it's this behavior that dominates. Just back and fourth and when a tolerance is built then it has to escalate. Until they are broken and become like the gimp in the scene. But you have the admins who are there to regulate when it gets out of hand. Well many of them seem to enjoy the sadistic power trip that authority gives them. I wonder what kinds of things they read and look at from their admin level of access. I don't need it besides being curious but there are ways of sating that curiosity without joining their ranks that I'll be pursuing. See like Butch in this scene I'm free of it. It's the occult power I have that allows me to escape the bonds. Much like Butch I just can't leave Marcellus to be tortured by those deviant sick fucks. To me unless it is something they seem to enjoy as a lifestyler to betray a person's true nature is a crime much greater than whatever power trip the character's Maynard and Zed are on in that scene in the basement of the Pawnshop. I have to set him free. I am quite a unique character as you will be finding out. Just how I have been trained over 30 years now by an occult being gives me a different identity when it comes to the real vampire that seems common. I am a bit of a sadist myself but it is sublimated to some refined qualities. I'll be sharing with some of you members all in good time who are abusers of the occult. ;)_-
So going to be working on this soon. All these different ankhs just don't appeal to me. I believe in eternal spirit but all life forms have that and what makes one unique has a lifespan that give it power. So during this unique life my concept of a holy symbol for the vampire is....a silver grill of vampire bat fangs. Yep just pop them in when the need arises. Been studying the vampire bat skull configuration to craft them. It's interesting how one set are made for cutting hair then the other for piercing. Just something seems so right about that. I know it could be quite tantalizing to trim hair that way in certain places. ;)
Silver corresponds well to moon especially with black tarnish in crevices to give contrast to polished reflected areas that stand out. Or just use bone from a vampire bat skull.