The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

VR has a HUGE Heart
22:54 Jan 30 2008
Times Read: 845

And while I am extolling the generous spirits of those here on VR, let me add that anonymous donations have been sent by others as well. Irony and Occam did their help anonymously, too. But I know them well enough to out them!



Here are some of the other incredible responses:



1. A VR member donated his very valuable time to design the center's complete website. It is more than we ever dreamed of, including interactive areas that tell the community what we need, a calendar, map, E-newsletter for me to reach people across the country and world, a paypal donation button so people can donate conveniently from the privacy of home, and referral links for other types of help. That same member also sent a box of 120 gloves to be distributed to the homeless population living under the Claiborne Bridge in New Orleans.



2. A VR member took his kids shopping for socks and warm tops and bottoms for the homeless under the bridge. I love that he incorporated the children in the service and all the details, including posting them here. He has assured that our next generation will have a heart for people less fortunate.



3. A VR member is knitting and gathering hats and gloves for the homeless. She has also pledged a financial pledge so that we can purchase what we need for this population.



4. Another VR member has pledged to ask her co-workers and friends to help her gather up all the scarves, hats and gloves they have outgrown or no longer use. She will post them to the center.



5. And not least, the encouragement. I am blown away by how responsive this site has been. Your prayers, good will, and encouragement make really good work possible.

Another Amazing Flyer
22:41 Jan 30 2008
Times Read: 849

Here is the second flyer that Irony and Occam did for the Center. This one is so lovely. I will use it to ask other agencies, organizations, churches, businesses, and individuals to consider a contribution to the Center. Again, I have had to edit out our name in keeping with the Center's advertising policy.

I can say thank you forever and it will never express how grateful I am to my wonderful friends and their generous hearts.

Each According to His ability
22:29 Jan 30 2008
Times Read: 853

The Board at the Center where I work has charged me to generate $60,000 in extra revenue over last year. I'm very excited and also a bit nervous about the opportunity. I've put together a Plan for Positive Action that covers lots of areas where I can focus.



The staff and I are planning our first fund raising event ever! I want to share the help that my friends, Occam and Irony (Go rate her a 10 right now and tell her she's amazing.) gave me in designing flyers. The first one was for the event, a fish and chicken fry. I'll use this format to ask businesses to donate the food, paper goods, and seasonings. I'll also use it to make flyers to announce the event itself. I removed the Center's name because of our advertising rules.

They donated their talents to help. Our goal is to raise $10,000 on this event. Thanks, you two, for being so generous with your time and ability. I would have made the standard cookie cutter template flyer. The chicken is awesome.

The Best Laid Plans Of Mice
03:03 Jan 25 2008
Times Read: 908

OK, really not my best plan ever. People were still very grateful, but it was incredibly eerie out there at night walking among the tents and sleeping bags.



In the future, I will try to plan to always have natural light. But we gave out all the gloves. Several of the men recognized me from last time and came over to say thank you. We did find Vera again, but she said her name was Mary. She remembered Allie and me, coming over to tell me that she's met another nice lady who came to take her to church. She choked up when I asked about gloves. She said someone stole them. She sank down on the curb and said, "they steal everything I got."



We gave her a new pair to put on and I slipped her a second pair to hide. I checked her lip under the light and it seems maybe a little better. We gave her a whole bottle of Tylenol this time. She cried and told me she loved me, that she loved us all. She said, "God bless you for coming out here." In truth, I heard that a lot tonight.



One man who lives there told me we shouldn't be walking through there at night. He has to sleep there, and he was warning us, concerned for our safety. My friend, Mickey, commented later in the car that he wasn't so much surprised by the poverty, but by the civility and gratitude we encountered.



So, why the hasty, poor planning? Because 2 people have died of hypothermia under that bridge since Jan. 1. Because I had warm things in my vehicle given for them. Because if I could have fallen asleep knowing those things, I wouldn't have been able to look in the mirror.



Thankfully, we were delivered unthreatened, unharmed, and a little wiser. Most thankfully, there are some hands a little warmer under an unfriendly sky, beneath a scary bridge, inside soft gloves given by you. Thank you so much to everyone who has offered in kind donations, money, prayers, and more. You are my heroes, my encouragement, and motivation. Without you, I'd have been home tonight probably watching Law & Order and playing Scrabble.



I know some of you have sent things that haven't yet arrived. Don't worry. We're definitely going back. We had given away over 100 pairs of gloves in under 30 minutes, and that includes walk time. The need is still great. I promise to distribute every hat and glove we get. I'd also like to get some socks. Several people asked for clean socks tonight.

Bridge Bound Earlier Than I'd Hoped
20:28 Jan 24 2008
Times Read: 919

Well, it's supposed to dip down to 37 degrees tonight in New Orleans. Add to that the rain and wind that charges down the center of that bridge like a cavalry bringing no good news, and it's going to be a freezing night. I had hoped to get the other shipment of gloves and some hats before going back, but now I'm wondering if I shouldn't take the 100 that I do have. I need to make sure that I can take at least one other adult with me if I go.



If I can't pull it off today, I'll definitely plan to head out early tomorrow. Hopefully the other gloves will be in by then, too. I've been out in the field today for work and every time I stepped out of my car, the weather bit straight into the marrow of my bones. I just don't know if I could sleep in my heated bedroom tonight knowing how cold and wet the night will be for people in tents and blankets and that I have gloves enough to keep 100 pairs of hands warm NOW.

Ugh...wait, there's a "yay" at the end!
19:13 Jan 22 2008
Times Read: 1,005

Today is a desk day. These are my least favorite days. The last 3 months have been budget time for the Center and my budget was rejected at the end of November. So, Dec and Jan have been slogging through spread sheet after spread sheet. This is SO not my gift. If I don't make heaven, I'll surely be an accountant in Hell. Swimming in lakes of fire would be cherry pie compared to an eternity of crunching numbers.



I have been able to get fund raising approved, though! Historically, my board has not been in favor of grants or fund raising, relying instead on our thrift store and donations - private, church, organizational, business, and other. With an increase in clients and a greater expense to operate post Katrina, it's time to do things a new way. I'm excited about the opportunity to go out into the community and talk about how they can partner with us and help.



For four years, I have wanted to host a 5K. It would give people the chance to see who we are, what we do, and have a fun day for a cause. I hope to have some good New Orleans food at the end. Along with the entry fee, I'd ask the participants and spectators to bring non perishable food. I even get to design a t-shirt. How cool is that?!

See Why My Hope Never Dies
17:32 Jan 22 2008
Times Read: 1,024

Yesterday, almost immediately after posting that journal entry, a VR member made a very generous donation of 120 pairs of gloves. He bought them on Ebay and is shipping them here.



This morning, 100 pairs of gloves were on my desk. A co-worker had shared the story I relayed over the phone when I called in. She told her brothers and they went to Wal Mart and bought all they had.



Also, my entry has gotten about 100 hits in one day. A number of you cared enough to comment and message me. I'm so encouraged always by the responses of people. We're not a callous world at heart. Most of the time, we just don't know HOW to help.



I've been criticized before about doing a one day event. They tell me that it does nothing to really solve the problem. They misunderstand my intentions. I have no delusions of grandeur. I have no power and I'm not going to fix the world. My one and only intention is to let hurting people know that somebody gives a damn. I look into their eyes and listen. I never say bullshit things like, "I know how you feel." or "Just hang in there."



When someone tells you that things are horrible, you listen and affirm that it is horrible. If they ask you for help, you offer what you can, never promising more than you can deliver. Much of the time, it's information...knowing which agency is doing what. Food is almost always do-able. I've never had to send someone away hungry yet. Sometimes food is all you can do.



But when you are genuine with people, when you truly treat them the way you'd want to be treated...with patience, they know. Who can't sniff out a phony? Yesterday we had a gentleman who said, "I hate when they get picky about the food we give, asking for different chips or cookies." I understand what he was trying to say. It can seem like ingratitude when someone doesn't accept your help with a thank you.



What I was able to share with him is that you have to understand WHO you are serving. The correlation to mental illness among the homeless is incredibly high. Most of them have a train wreck of a past and at the very least, need serious counseling that they are not receiving. Many will have addictions. Many are dealing with arrested development of one sort or another. These are the employees who cannot get along with their peers, who cannot remain employed. Very few of the homeless in extreme living conditions (like under the bridge) are there because of one bad break. That is a lie and miscommunication of special interest groups with their own agenda.



These are the folks who need beds in in-house mental health services, case workers to assure they are getting to out-patient counseling, or well-managed shelters that assess and make life plans with their residents. These are the folks who embarrass and infuriate us. These are the folks who don't have the first clue about how to be consistent. If they earn $100, it will be gone within the hour.



When you decide that this is the population you desire to help, you will need a few metaphors at your fingertips in order to keep your sanity and heart intact. The most useful one is the parent metaphor. While you may think it sounds patronizing, imagining a client as your child can be very helpful. We all like to bless our children, but we also teach. Would you reward your child's continued poor choices or would you be creative and come up with a game plan to help lead them toward better choices? Sometimes when the request for money is obviously not a good plan, buying groceries and freeing up resources for them to pay their own bill might be a better plan.



At the center where I work, I teach my staff and volunteers that we never say "no." We give a qualified "yes." Our yes often has "if you... then we'll..." attached to it. We always follow through and do what we say. Sometimes it's "If you get a job today and we can verify it, when you start and what you'll be earning, then we'll pay this electric bill." Sometimes it's teaching people a hierarchy of needs...if you can't afford to eat, a cell phone and cable aren't good choices for you right now.



It is far easier to just give them what they ask for. Real help is hard work. You have to become detectives and find out what the true cause of the emergency is. Not being able to pay a bill isn't an emergency...the WHY you can't is. We don't help the story (and boy, some of them are good.) We help the need. You don't get sucked into someone else's emotions, even when you are touched. You remain objective so that you can be of the most use to all involved.



It's not a job for everyone, but it is what I love doing. My daughter shared with me a story from her school. Her teacher was advising the students on the importance of taking a job you love over a job that simply pays well. She asked the class to raise their hands if their parents loved their jobs and were happy to go to work every day. My daughter was the only one with her hand up.



Thank you all for reading. Thank you for encouraging and helping in all the unsung ways that you do. Ultimately, this is not the story of me...it's the story of us. We're all together in a world that has pockets of loveliness and pools of misery. When we hit our own lows, the right encouragement can be the difference between personal success and failure. So, why not take the opportunities that come our way to be that encouragement to others? In as much as we will help another in a small or large way, even more, we'll walk away knowing ourselves a little better.

Under The Bridge
21:20 Jan 21 2008
Times Read: 1,121








I've just gotten home and wanted to get straight to my journal to record my day. I helped organize a group to go out under the Claiborne bridge today to attend to the needs of the homeless who are living there. We took a medical vehicle, enough food and water to feed 200 people, clothing, children's books, bibles, stuffed animals, and gloves. We screened people for medical problems, gave inoculations, fed, cared for, listened to, and talked with as many people as we could.



My first reaction to the visual realization of how many people there were was almost as though my senses had been assaulted. As far as my eyes could trace the bridge, there were tents and people under blankets without tents, the edges weighted down with rocks and shoes, making them look like mummies. But there was no time to stare and try to make sense out of what cannot be understood.



The wind was brutal. It iced the bones and left hands numb. I learned that it had been a hard freeze last night. People had to keep moving in order to make it through until the sun came up. We bagged the food and water, then a handful of ladies, my girl and I went to call into tents, "Excuse me, if you need medical attention or food, we're across the street in the parking lot."



Some came. Many did not. We realized it was just too cold. So, we armed ourselves with boxes of food and bags of gloves and set out to where they were zipped and huddled into the only warmth they could find. We gave away everything and could easily have given more.



So many of them stand out in my mind. We encountered only two people who seemed severely mentally ill, and they chose to completely ignore us. One gentleman said, "I'm on crack for real." He accepted food, but none of our other offers to help. All the others we met were amazing. They were personable, grateful, and kind. We were treated with great respect.



I think the 3 gentlemen sitting on a couch will live in my memory a long time yet. It was so odd seeing that couch there on the side of a chain link fence near their pitched tents. They had a blanket over them against the wind. They asked if we had gloves. You would have thought we were giving them gold. Not one person asked us for money. We tried finding "man colored" gloves, but soon ran out. It made us smile along with the men who said they didn't mind pink, because when your hands are cold, warm is the only color that matters.



But by a wide margin, Vera will be the face of my day. She lives in a tent covered by a blue plastic tarp. All she wanted was aspirin because she had been beaten and was in pain. Her eye was blackened and swollen and her lip was split, swollen, and obviously infected. The medical unit was not able to dispense medications because they were not doctors, and she was hurt and confused by that. To be honest, so was I. I got her 4 aspirins, some moist towelettes, and a new carmex I had in my glove box. She hugged me and thanked me for that tiny kindness. What happens to the Veras of our world?



I was so glad to have my daughter along with me. She is the boldest, most grown up person I know. We called into so many tents, and she was right there with me every step of the way. She was the only teen that didn't want to stay with the medical unit. I would guess that in the course of the day, we probably walked 12 miles.



When we were done, I took her to get lunch, since we gave away all the food we had. We talked about the experience and she kept going back to the man who wanted to trade his LSU ball cap for a knit hat. We had already given them away and had to tell him so. She said that she is going to organize a hat and glove drive at her school. I am going to approach some local churches to do the same. More than food even, the gloves and hats are a true need.



We talked about the importance of having a heart to help hurting people. Her dream is to one day own horses and bring underprivileged children to a camp where they get to ride and groom horses. I told her that if anything ever happened to me, for her to know that I am the richest woman alive. I have everything I could ever want in my kids and the job that I love doing every day. I don't ever want to do anything else.

"How to fall in love with poetry" or "More Jo gushing about Eliot"
02:18 Jan 07 2008
Times Read: 1,200

Anyone who knows me well knows my obsession with T.S. Eliot and his Prufrock.



Will I never tire reading this work aloud? I can't count the number of times I have read this poem, melting into the rhythm, wearing that cadence like I wear my own favorite old jacket, wrapping it around me.



Read these two lines out loud. They aren't even my favorite lines in this work, but listen to how they sound on your lips, how the author played with the beauty of words and sound. this is how you fall in love with poetry.





"Combing the white hair of the waves blown back

When the wind blows the water white and black."

Thank you for this
21:04 Jan 06 2008
Times Read: 1,213

"...I always remember my great grandmother's saying she always told me when I was eating her marvelous soup.





'Haroshova pa ne'mnoshku...' "









Good things always come in small quantities.