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Joli's Journal


Joli's Journal

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PROFILE




15 entries this month
 

Man, I wish I'd said that!

08:28 Jan 30 2008
Times Read: 705


VW: I always liked the tribbles.

Me: They're born pregnant, ya know.

Morri: Yeah, like Kentucky girls!


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Vampirewitch39
Vampirewitch39
13:59 Jan 30 2008

Great to finally chat with you last...I mean this morning. And they are cute...but not around Kligons.





 

Water Fun (or Nya Nya Nya Nya Nya Stabb)

04:34 Jan 26 2008
Times Read: 768


They are very difficult to catch on camera. The photographer who captured this incredible photo had to spend months in the field gaining the trust of these proud and shy creatures. This is a very rare image of the Aquatic Tortoise playfully sliding into the water for a sleek dive. They are excellent swimmers, much like the otter.

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Thanks again, Irony and Occam. You are amazing!

COMMENTS

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STABB666
STABB666
04:40 Jan 26 2008

Isn't it a bit dangerous to throw rocks down a water slide?



>;)





Joli
Joli
04:46 Jan 26 2008

Didn't your mom ever tell you that if you leave your tongue in your cheek so long that it will stick like that?





captainglobehead
captainglobehead
19:55 Jan 26 2008

Love the tortoise with waterwings.





CTyler
CTyler
01:10 Jan 27 2008

Aquatic Tortoise? You mean a turtle... in water?

They can do that? :P





 

Boris the Bondage Tortoise

04:44 Jan 24 2008
Times Read: 815


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Ok, Stabb. I know you've gone to bed, but I put in some research and it seems I was right after after all. Apparently tortoises CAN swim.





Thank you, Irony and Occam for your photoshopping prowess launched for the cause of me being right. I love you both!!


God, you have no idea how much I love this image :)

COMMENTS

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sockpuppet
sockpuppet
05:26 Jan 24 2008

Shouldn't it be Bartleby, the bondage tortoise?





Joli
Joli
05:32 Jan 24 2008

Nah...he's too happy. If he were in the fetal position, maybe :)





sockpuppet
sockpuppet
05:37 Jan 24 2008

He does look happy in his water wings LOL



What sort of far reaching discussion broaches the topic of whether tortoises can swim?






Joli
Joli
20:15 Jan 24 2008

I think it may have begun with my "sea tortoise" comment. I lost ground rapidly after that. I kept seeing the headline over the Chaos entry in Stabb's journal that would read, "Joli and the Sea Tortoise." I knew then and there that I needed indisputable evidence that tortoises swim. I think I've met my burden of proof :)





STABB666
STABB666
04:36 Jan 26 2008

I'm sorry my dear, but this is not unassisted, as would be required to define a real 'swimmer'.



:P





Joli
Joli
04:44 Jan 26 2008

He just uses the water wings to make the other sea tortoises laugh...like a Groucho Marx mustache. Oh yeah...it's a sea tortoise classic.





Silverbow
Silverbow
04:55 Jan 27 2008

The Eastern Box Turtle can also swim. : winks:





 

Spotted dick

00:36 Jan 20 2008
Times Read: 849


You're eating a WHAT?!



And tell me that you did NOT just say that you want to make love to the spoon.


COMMENTS

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Angelus
Angelus
15:14 Jan 21 2008

'spotted dick' ..delicious, with thick custard.





 

Searching...not...to...say..."bitch"

00:33 Jan 20 2008
Times Read: 853


(Best read with a British accent)



"I have...on occasion...heard you have...a slightly...impatient tone."


COMMENTS

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STABB666
STABB666
00:34 Jan 20 2008

Yeah, but I didn't say bitch though, huh? huh!?





Scarlett
Scarlett
13:39 Jan 24 2008

omg...i love it...stabb you rock!





 

Careful what you ask for

00:05 Jan 18 2008
Times Read: 890


So, I ask Charles if I can link the images from his site because my storage here is getting tight.


Joli: Please?

Charles: sure

Joli: Thanks!

Charles: *goes and replaces THOSE 2...with goatse*


COMMENTS

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Burning At the Stilts has WAY more potential for comedic opportunity

23:59 Jan 17 2008
Times Read: 892


Another Charles Original! Honestly, I have the greatest friends EVER!





COMMENTS

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My friend's dramatization of why he won't play Scrabble with me anymore.

23:46 Jan 17 2008
Times Read: 903





COMMENTS

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STABB666
STABB666
23:55 Jan 17 2008

And this, is why I smile so much when I beat you.



Yeah, I beat you. Eight times. Yeah, you see that? That really happened.



>;)





Joli
Joli
00:10 Jan 18 2008

I notice that a very important number was left out of your dance of joy there. How many times have you lost to me again? I forget. :P





 

Follow the dotted line

05:36 Jan 15 2008
Times Read: 937


a little guidance for the confused:


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Thanks to my friend, Charles for the concept and Occam for the execution (pun most assuredly intentional.)

COMMENTS

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BLOODLIFE
BLOODLIFE
09:10 Jan 15 2008

That is novel, I would have expected arrows for direction as I'd hate to think people slice from right to left - such bad manners. lol





 

The kid cracks me up

21:09 Jan 14 2008
Times Read: 958


I asked my daughter to turn off the computer for the night and she looked at me with puppy dog eyes and said, "I can't mama, all my friends live in there!"


COMMENTS

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captainglobehead
captainglobehead
21:19 Jan 14 2008

Very, very cute.





queenmorbid
queenmorbid
01:20 Jan 18 2008

Really cute. Sounds like something my daughter would say





 

Mmmmm. I feel so forgiving.

05:05 Jan 14 2008
Times Read: 984


My friend, Occam, made this gorgeous Chocolate IV for me in the cause of keeping life, limb, and genitals safe.


Perhaps finding a good vein would be wise. Who's gonna do the stick? ;)


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COMMENTS

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Silverbow
Silverbow
22:57 Jan 14 2008

I'll do it!! I'll do it!!!!

If its anything like the old Coffee IV Drip from #Vampires.. I have practice!!!





 

Females, pho, fun figuring, and finger food

05:58 Jan 09 2008
Times Read: 1,039


A perfect rainy night spent indoors with my 2 girls. We got takeout Viet Namese soups, did lateral thinking puzzles, and made rice krispie treats.


The girls got pho ba, a chicken-based rice noodle soup made with an amazing broth that has a touch of allspice which makes your nose dance with joy. I got vegetable yet ca mein, a ramen noodle soup filled with broccoli, pea pods, mushrooms, and every kind of vegetable imaginable. I challenge you to finish a bowl! The soups are served piping hot with a side dish of basil, cilantro, lime, bean sprouts, peppers, hoisin sauce, and siracha sauce. Once you season your soup to taste, no 2 will be alike. I like lots of lime, hoisin, cilantro, and a little dab of siracha...mmm mmm

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We must have done a dozen lateral thinking puzzles. We even turned CSI off to do them and my oldest stopped texting to play along! The best one was: A man orders albatross at a restaurant, eats one bite, leaves and kills himself...why?


My youngest was determined to make the rice krispie treats, but our tummies were so full of good soup, we had to wrap them up for tomorrow.

COMMENTS

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Writer's High

22:05 Jan 08 2008
Times Read: 1,055


Spanking a little prose, just to see if I can.


Occam's image couldn't be more perfect for the story I wanted to tell!


I am hoping that those of you who who like my journal will find a fondness for this story even though it's so different from other things I have written here. (Story can be found in Hiccups - "Rest Weary" )


I just posted it and a reader asked me about the intentions of the person out by the river. THIS is why I write...keep all your drugs...this is my high:


Read bottom up. Name withheld to protect the hardly innocent :)


(For the record, though, he's wrong...I wrote it just for YOU.)




On 15:40:29 Jan 08 2008 (-6 GMT) reader wrote:


But I have to admit that it felt like you wrote that just for me. It brought back memories that I had pushed down. Memories of wondering about the lives of opposing forces, making them individuals instead of objects.


It used to give me nightmares. Every once in a while I lived, briefly, as one of my targets. Only the last few seconds.


On 15:39:36 Jan 08 2008 (-6 GMT) Joli wrote:


Then I love that. You made me feel successful. I wrote something that allowed you to bring yourself forward.


On 15:35:29 Jan 08 2008 (-6 GMT) reader wrote:


I noticed that. I could not read it without feeling that the narrator's motive was the same as mine, so many years ago.


On 15:32:43 Jan 08 2008 (-6 GMT) Joli wrote:


I purposely left a lot out. I didn't even give away gender.


On 15:31:54 Jan 08 2008 (-6 GMT) reader wrote:


I was afraid of that.


I cannot tell you how many times I've looked through those very eyes. And I know why I was there.


On 15:28:41 Jan 08 2008 (-6 GMT) Joli wrote:


you tell me ;)


On 15:27:19 Jan 08 2008 (-6 GMT) reader wrote:


OK, I will break protocol and ask you directly: what was the narrator actually doing out in the field? And what was the soldier to him/her?


COMMENTS

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I promise, you'll be sniffing your arm for hours when you get out of the tub!

20:41 Jan 06 2008
Times Read: 1,080


Oh god, have you discovered these yet? If I am missing a while from VR and you become worried and send the police to check on me, tell them to go straight to the master bath. In fact, why am I even here when I could be soaking and bathing right now!



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Reality show I really really want to see.

07:20 Jan 03 2008
Times Read: 1,139


"Extreme Stop-Fucking-Dressing-Like-That"


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