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Vampires and BDSM
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SinginGhost88
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01:20:51 Oct 06 2012
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Ok, so obviously there is a connection between the topic of vampires and BDSM. More specifically, the Dominant/submissive dynamic. The Vampire is someone I would see as the dominant in these stories, and the victim is the submissive.

First off my question is, do you see the connection?

In Carmilla, Le Fanu played around with the idea of female sexuality, lesbianism and female power, in 1872 the idea of female sexuality was extremely taboo, hell, even unheard of. Today we could argue that we live in a patriarchal system. In the BDSM community, I think that a lot of gender roles, expectations and boundaries become crossed and people are able to explore different aspects of their personality/sexuality. Females are given a sort of power whether as a Domme, or a submissive. Which is something that has been explored in many vampire novels and movies. the "Femme fatale". Patriarchy doesn't really have a role to play which I think frees both men and women from expectation and the pressure to perform a specific gender role.

The second part of my question is, with vampires and BDSM becoming more main stream, how do you think this is going to effect society? Gender roles/ expectations within society?

I am loathe to say it but, with the outbreak of the "50 Shades of Grey" crap, and Anne Rice's new trilogy, many people who haven't even thought about picking up a set of handcuffs (or admitted to thinking about it) and have fallen in love with the unhealthy relationship between Bella and Edward... what do you think this means for women and men now? Both sexually and in terms of expected fulfillment of roles. Does the vampire myth create a sort of gender equity or does it perpetuate the dichotomy that exists between men and women?

I mean... not all vampires are male, and not all victims are women. Some are bisexual, some identify as a gender that falls in between the dichotomy. The story of the vampire breaks down the socially constructed idea of female.male, heterosexual relationships. It breaks boundaries.

So what do you think?




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Severus
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09:13:49 Oct 06 2012
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Honestly... a vampire is a vampire. Whether they are Sanguine or Psionic in nature the need to consume external energy is the driving force behind what we do as vampires.
I'm not really sure how BD/SM get transfered onto vampirism all the time, out side of the kink of bloodplay there is no real connection.

Yes it is technically possible for anyone to be aroused by anything, but for those who are truly vampiric it's just very, very rare.
Vampires use sexual enegries and the arousal / desires of their pray as a lure... a means to an end. Those vampires who are Sanguine crave blood not as an act of passion but as food. If there is a sexual desire it is for the person themselves and that desire is separate from and in no way connected to the consumption of blood.

The idea of being sexually turned on by the sight of blood is a falsehood put forth by the Catholic church during the middle ages in an attempt to place a stigma upon any type of blood letting. Salvation via the blood of Christ verses damnation via the blood of anything else... Hollywood has helped to carry that myth into the modern age and it's more of a stereo type then a reality.

The truth of bd/sm and vampires is that (in most peoples cases) eroticism with blood play resulting in sexual arousal are characteristics of Renfield's syndrome, a clinical condition... and not real vampirism.


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SinginGhost88
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13:09:53 Oct 06 2012
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I supposed I should have clarified then, that I was focusing more on the effect of the vampire mythology in popular culture. As opposed to real vampires.

There is a connection in popular culture between the vampire stories being told in books, movies and television and the dominant and submissive dynamic in a BDSM relationship. I also wonder if it is changing the nature of gender roles and expectations, since popular culture is a heavy handed influence for a lot of people.





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rush
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11:25:22 Oct 07 2012
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it would be lucky for the one who can combine, a good deep psy feed, with slave play, and sexual arousal then drink the end with blood, thats the bella and whatsy ide like to see



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creep
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21:25:08 Oct 07 2012
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not all vampires are dominant and some would be both maybe..



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SinginGhost88
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23:48:48 Oct 07 2012
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Great point, a lot of vampires in modern day novels and TV shows aren't dominant.



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SireHecate
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06:55:31 Oct 08 2012
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As someone who practises BDSM and a sanguin, I find the blending of the two very sexually exciting and would help in heightening the sexual atmosphere



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erebus0
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20:54:35 Oct 11 2012
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i agree with masterme.ot is in our nature to be preditors,and having your "prey" helpless in front of you is greatly sexualy gratifying.



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SinginGhost88
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01:23:00 Oct 12 2012
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I think the ENTIRE point of my post has been totally lost.

I am talking more than just the idea of vampirism and practices, if at all.

I am talking about gender boundaries/ stereotypes/ expectations being pushed, parallels between vampirism in POPULAR CULTURE and BDSM play.

I am not talking about real vampires, which I clarified earlier.



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Shadowdragonmaster
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02:35:23 Oct 14 2012
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film have alway put vampire and sexy together and in some way it right, and in other its very wrong too



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SinginGhost88
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02:45:26 Oct 14 2012
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Could you perhaps, elaborate on that?



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8thHunterScar
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04:40:06 Oct 14 2012
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So shadow according to your statement you think Nosferatu was sexy? O_o strange. . .



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SireHecate
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00:04:44 Oct 19 2012
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Songing I believe as a practitioner of BDSM that vampirsim and the other aspects blend quite well. In fact there are already such groups on Fetlife.com, 100's of these people incorporate BDSM, D/s/Ss on their vampire lifestyles.

a vampire researcher, aithot and speaker, Michelle Berlanger is a leading example of this. She incorporates it all nicely. Personally I believe any boundaries are personal and yet can be encroached and explored.



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RomanticVampire
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02:35:33 Oct 19 2012
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i agree there is a certian part of bdsm more then not it is the vampire who is the top, only on the few occasions do you see the victem topping from the bottom



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LadyShadowolf
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16:56:48 Oct 21 2012
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Well I see it a lot in what I enjoy reading for example the Anita Blake Vampire Hunter series by Laurell K Hamilton. In these books you see a young female in the beginning who is dominant and is somewhat of a prude about sexuality to quote 1 of the books "Once a catholic always a catholic", and because of what has happened to her in the book She in essence becomes a bit of a Psi vamp with minor blood lusts and a shape shifter with a lot of different animals to shift into but can't. With the shape shifters she has learned not to fear her sexuality and to overcome her catholic upbringing



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SireHecate
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22:20:29 Oct 21 2012
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You can have a a plethora of dynamics in the fetsih and bampire worlds. Both compliment the other in many ways. How you choose to explore it in between your partner/s can make for wonderful experiences.



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SireHecate
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07:44:25 Oct 25 2012
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As I stated before go for it, jowever I suggest you check out learning resources on the topic first. So many times I've seen people buy stuff, not know how to properly use it and the next thing you realise is a casualty room visit. Imagine explain the mishap to the charge nurse?



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darkscorpion83
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03:21:00 Oct 28 2012
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its all the matter of view point but you can be both rather or not your a vampire or not



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Oceanne
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13:27:23 Oct 28 2012
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Hey Singing,I thought I might provide this link for you.It might not answer your question in full,but its a pretty good read..

http://www.dartmouth.edu/~elektra/thesis.html



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SireHecate
SireHecate

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19:28:35 Nov 07 2012
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Very importantly I'm of the opinion that being vampirism is an alt lifestyle, both have something in common cause. Discover how to use that correlation to your best advantage for you and paRTNERS IS ALWAYS THE KEY



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AngelusMortis
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23:45:14 Nov 13 2012
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what if the vampire legends arose of out people say town lords etc practising forms of bdsm on villagers



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krissykbee
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00:59:58 Nov 14 2012
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I have always thought that the 2 go hand in hand to a point scratching biting and even to tie someone up and the whole control thing with BDSM is definatley liked with vampires!



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AsphaltTears
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18:40:30 Nov 14 2012
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Possibly in books and all which is what the questioner asked about and how it affects pop culture, not the vampire community. Many in the community are into BDSM but it is a small percentage just as blood drinkers are a small percentage. BDSM is a choice and not someone's nature. Being preditory is recognized by most in a way but discouraged and looked down upon in the modern community but in books, etc that is usually played down unless it is more of an erotic movie or book. I think for some since the idea is in the open now, the stories do influence people. The idea of something somewhat forbidden and in the same time erotic is appealing because there are many more activities and people involved. Consentual role playing where one is dominant over the other person I think is tantalizing to certain people. Still it is merely a lifestyle choice where most believe vampirism is not. We know from the news that many act out or try to do things they have seen and read and sometimes to a bad ending. Personally I think it is a modern idea that these two things connect to each other. Fictional vampires can do anything the author wants them to and sometimes individuals don't get that. Some don't realize real people cannot accomplish the same things as fictional characters. Where is the dividing line between victimizing someone and BDSM?



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SinginGhost88
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21:34:52 Nov 14 2012
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I believe that fine line comes down to consent. You're right, people often forget that the Vampire is a fictional character and doesn't exist. It is capable of transcending the physical and psychological limitations placed on human beings. furthermore it transcends the gender limitations that society places on us. Which is exactly what BDSM allows us to do, which is why I feel the two interrelate.

BDSM allows people to explore and push boundaries, which is exactly what the Vampire myth does in popular culture. It pushes hetero-normative boundaries of sexuality and expectation of gender performance. True Blood is one of the first mainstream shows to have a gay, black vampire. (Correct me if I am wrong). Vampirism has always been on the fore front of embarrassing and exploring female sexuality as opposed to 'sweeping it under the rug' like many mainstream stories do. Such as Disney movies and pretty much all comedic romance movies.

Anywhooo. Your original question was about differentiating between vicitimisation/abuse and BDSM, And I do believe it comes down to consent, and giving the submissive the ability to withdraw consent whenever they feel the need.



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Angelus
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01:09:23 Nov 15 2012
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always thought that the submissive in a relationship is the one with the power, for without them agreeing to their role, how can a master be?



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SinginGhost88
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02:37:01 Nov 15 2012
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Agreed, Angelus. However the power exchange dynamic is different for everyone couple.



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krissykbee
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21:40:43 Nov 15 2012
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With vampirism you are giving your consent to someone to bite you or drink your blood give into that person mind body and soul. It is the same way with BDSM.



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Terminus
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16:32:06 Nov 16 2012
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First, lets clarify.

There are no real vampires

BDSM is pretty much a "catch all" term, that encompasses many forms and levels of relationships.

This would include:

Bondage and Discipline
Dominance and submission
Sadomasochism or sadism and masochism

There are also many kink activities accepted by the BDSM community (depending on your geographic location) that do not fit in general, into the three main topics that most people associate with BDSM, however, are considered part of the BDSM community.

The media has always romanticized the vampire. Whether it be books, magazines, film or television. This in general has set the standards by which the public views and accepts the vampire.

Obviously, early works have us see the male as the dominant, the female always as the submissive. Over the years, as early as the 1960s, we start to see films including the female in the dominant role. As we have evolved over the last few decades, gender lines are getting crossed. At this point, I'm not sure it's even relevant whether it be male or female in the dominant role.

I really don't see vampires categorized into the BDSM community. While I'm sure there are those that follow these lines in real life. It's still a niche that many are unwilling to admit they belong to, due to the stigma that society imposes.






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SireHecate
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22:18:50 Nov 16 2012
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Actually there's a great vampire community on Fetlife and Aly. You'll see a ton og them.



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• • • • THIS THREAD IS CLOSED • • • •
•  Closed by Vampirewitch39 on Dec 17 2012  •

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