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I have an 11 year old boy who seems to really pick up on emotions. My question is at what age would a child begin to use that ability, and how would you check to see if that is really what's happening or if it could be something else?

Ask him questions on how he feels about certain subjects...Try to see why he picks up that fast..And I do think that he can start now..Any child who can start speaking can..Hope you are able to find the answers you seek young one..

Thanks for responding to the post. Are there any specific questions that should be asked?

I don't know about the questions, but I have some for you, since I found out I was an empath not while ago.
Does he react to certain people with almost disgust, or the opposite reaction, feels like being close to some people?
Does he seem extremelly vulnerabley to the environment he's in? Does he have strange reactions when next to people that show a lot of anger, or sadness, even if he doesen't know the person?
I'm still trying to figure this out...

I am not so sure he does but you just described me to a tee!!!!!!!!

Is it possible to be an empath and not know it?

Yup. It is.
Took me 30 years to know what caused so many strange behaviors from my part.
It just had never crossed my mind.
This question is for both of you (your son, in this case):
Do you feel unconmfortable in crowded places, or does your son prefer the quiet places with less people?
Do you feel irritated in molls, markets, places where there seems to be an endless noise, that even if you cover your ears it's still there?
I'm telling things that happen to me...

I think the age one begins to use the ability varies by person. Sometimes you are not aware that what is going on, is related to others emotional state.

Once he is ready to accept this and embrace it however, you need to work with him on developing ways to 'block' some of the things that come through, for his own sake.

Being an empath can affect you immensely if you are not ready and can't channel it properly. It causes stress, adds to existing health issues via that stress, among other things.

It's hard, really hard, to block things, trust me, I can't always do it, especially when I'm tired or really close to a person.

You may also find that it is not always those he interacts with in person. It can affect you even if the person is in another state, provided you are open to that person mentally and somewhat emotionally and feel a connection.

Yes he doesn't like a big crowd at all he gets what I would call an anxiety (sorry spelling) attack almost. I on the other hand I guess have a better control over it only there has been a few occassions that I really felt hate and had to hit something for no reason. I find at night he has the roughest time and this is where I was wondering if he had that gift because it never fails if I am having a rough night from missing my soulmate who at this time has to be away which is his father he seems to have a real bad night, almost twice as bad as me.

Sounds like he's definatly picking up things from you on this. You might need to find some outlets, to lessen things, so that he's able to feel less, or maybe you can start now, teaching him how to block or deal with things better.

I have tried to tell him to take a deep breath and let it out slow and try to tell me what exactly he is feeling at that time but I have no clue what I am doing so I will be glad to take any suggestions you might have to help teach him to block this!

Very true with the blocking...I have a very hard time doing that. Usually focusing on a persistent thought or image does the trick, but sometimes, it's so hard that I have to leave.
Now my friends don't understand why I prefer to walk a long way to go to my place, instead of crashing at theirs, but I don't like most houses I visit.
I'm a shit magnet (pardon the language).
Very true with connections with people that are far away.
A friend of mine 'vanished' for some time, and he's a very sick men.
For some reason, I couldn't feel worried about him.
Today my mother went shopping and found him, alive and kicking.

Like Tears said, find an image or thought he can focus on when it gets bad. And sometimes, you do just have to get away from the person/crowd.

Blocking tho is the only thing that works for those at a distance, obviously. What is really strange, is when you can feel emotions, stress, etc. of those you have never met face to face but have talked to by phone. It makes it kind of freaky when you feel their pains.

you can be an empath from birth...children are more innocent and possesses an open mind to all things around them where as adults tend to focus on themselves and their problems more so then anything else...

in all honesty, i wouldnt bombard him with questions and the like, just help him cope with the feelings he gets cuz not all emotions that people are able to pick up from others are good ones..some might make him afraid or sad and it would help him if you just listen to him

He has a feeling all the time that someone is watching him. Can this be from that ability? I find he is sad alot more than a normal child!

this is really interesting to me. i didn't realize someone so young could experience (would you say emotions?) like this!

I don't think he should be worried about being 'watched' persay, but he may get that feeling from other empaths that sense him, in a manner of speaking.

Ick, empathy.

Something that helped me before I, ah, got rid of it...

Practice this yourself first before trying to teach it to your son.

When feeling overwhelmed by energy/emotion that is not your own, place your hands firmly upon the ground. Earth is best, but a regular carpeted floor works too. (It's about half science, half psychology.) Then concentrate on letting the energy flow through your body, to your hands, and into the earth.

It's an alternative to blocking, and I chose it over defense because I found that when I blocked, it tended to create something like a pressurized box within. Takes more energy to do and it just made me crazier.

Best of luck to you and your son.

Another thing that can happen is a diagnosis of "bipolar disorder" because of the mood changes caused by being empathic...

Yes, disliking crowds is common because in crowds there are so many strong emotions that sometimes you get overwhelmed, hence the "anxiety attack" that isn't a real anxiety attack. I have experienced both, real anxiety attacks and the overwhelming. They are similar, but different!

I also believe the sadness is a part of it: sadness is so common in the world we live in, and so easy to detect. It tends to override most other emotions...

At that age id leave him alone, let him have his childhood. No child likes to be made aware that they are different, in any way shape or form and personaly i think your heading for trouble if you start putting thoughts in his head now. Lifes hard enough once you get older knowing that you have abilities others dont and coming to terms with it. Let him have some peace whilst he can.

Words of wisdom from Sky. I'd follow that advice in a heartbeat, if I were you.

I believe I'm an empath but im not quite sure.

jdenoyon, you took the words out of my mouth.
I think he feels sad because he's more connected with the emotional energy around him, and people aren't very happy lately, now, are they...?
To listen is also a good idea, but for some reason, i think you already do that.
What you want, is for your child to be safe, to do something about it.
You obviously have a very strong connection, so when it's time, he'll come to you, like when you tell him to breath slowlly, when things get rough.
Don't worry too much, or you will both form an emotional 'snow-ball', and may be harder for you to get to terms with your own emathy, and your son's empathic skills.
Learn more about it.
That's what I'm doing.
That's all I can tell you dear.
That, and wish you the best.

As far as being an empath, large crowds that seem very impatient (busy sidewalks, art fairs.... theme parks, blech) tend to cause anxiety and a feeling of too many emotions all at once. It's best to step into a restroom or small shop he's familiar with/ interested in, in case it happens.

I've been empathetic for a very, very long time-- and for children it can be both a blessing and a curse.

I think what needs pointing out here are children are naturaly empathic anyway. they are not as jaded as adults and havent had lifes little lessons knocked into them. I have a child who has selective mutism. I dont make a big deal out of it . I dont let anyone else make a big deal out of it. Children are pretty damn clever and soon wise up to things. Its when you try and make problems where non occur that the child then gets anxcious about themselves. Me, id just give the poor bugger a hug and more attention. Maybe mum needs to take a look at her own anxiety levels and calm down a bit. As i said before children are naturaly capable of picking up on emotions.

Well this is a subject that i had questiond about myself as my 1 year old has shown sure fire sings that he has inherited my dark gift and the empathic ability. I think that this often depends on the induvidual and how much stress/emothing that they may have to go through. I never thought possable that such a young one could show such abilities however everyday he proves more and more to be my little equal. I know that this prolly doesnt help much however it is the best way to basically explain that everyone is different and adapts to their powers differently and in their own time

I am an empath.. have been all my life.. I have an open mind and other things seem to come with that. I can not disscuss that on a forum post for it would take to long and be very long.

I have seen a great many things you have came up that works for you. However you have to remember this is a child that does not have some of our adult ressoning.

First and for most he has to be a child but don't make him think that his is "normal" or abnormal. He knows that he has a gift and a gift it is if you can learn to use it for the good things. Some say it is a curse as I did for the longest time.

To help him and you with stress:

When he falls asleep and in REM sleep. Talk to him. Tell him the feelings he has during the day will leave him at night. Do this everynight during this sleep cycle until he starts sleeping better and is more refreshed. You can also tell him in that cycle that you will do your best to help him through whatever he feels during the day. Tell him when it gets to much to let the engery pass through him and not stay. Much to what some would call grounding. Which I seen said already. You can't block the feelings for that causes more stress.

Also for those that think it is Bi-polar. you are wrong. I am an Empath but blocking the feelings from so long ago has caused my bi-polar.

I do the same with the feelings from it that I do when I have someone elses feelings. I let the feeling go through me instead of catching with in me. I am non medicated because I can do this!

"I find that Sky and Arunima are sharing the same thoughts that I bear on the situation. Children are free from the programmed prejudice that society bears upon those of us who have walked longer in its company, which naturally allows them more contact with their natural skills and abilities. In this day and age there is much danger involved with focusing on such skills at such a young age. Knowing that you yourself posess similar gifts, I would think the best thing for you to do right now is to shield him the best you can with your own strength. Focus on maintaining your own balance and show him the path through experience. If you remain grounded, then he will notice it and though not directly "teaching" him in a manner of speaking, you will be allowing him the chance to acquire the protection that he needs.

Until next we meet be well...

What I've found when dealing with empathic kids, is to give them a "worry sotne". It doesn't have to be an expensive one, but make it one that you can't readily pic up from the ground around where you live. ( Heamatite is good). Then whe he's getting "anxious" get him to rub the stone and "put his worry in the stone". I've found that by having them concentrate on "putting the anxiety away" they actually wind up self-sheilding themselves.

Then once they've reached fouteen or fifteen I teach them "meditation" of grounding and centering as a "study helper".

Since there has already been some good advice given here, I would recommend that you read the articles that Stabb666 put together for Energy work basics- esp. his ones on grounding and centring.

If you are feeling these things too you might be rubbing off on him or vice versa. Best thing you can do is make sure that you are grounded and centered.

Not all children are as empathic as others, if it is something he has been gifted with he will need your support.


Thanks...although, itwas LordSeth who did the one on grounding and it turns out that he largely plagerised it from another forum.

;) STABB

I've felt uncomfortable standing in a large gathering of people to the point where I just need to sit down and observe. I also feel I do better off in less crowded quieter places when I am the least disturbed.

Now if those are the symptoms of an empath that's something I've been trying to grasp.

I think children can start picking up on your emotions even before they can talk. I have seen it. Some children are extremely sensitive and these tend to be the one's who turn into empaths (I am one myself).
In your child's case it could be that he is or it could also be that he is simply watching your emotions. The only way you can tell is to expose him to some other people. If he starts picking up on their emotions also then I would say he is. But if it is only happening with you I would just say that it has something to do with the child/parent bond.
Noone else is going to be able to tell you but you or another empath. This isn't something you need to talk him to a doctor over. Neither is him having anxieties in big crowds. That is so normal for children!
As far as the bi-polar comment goes, they judge you on some much more than just anxieties before labelling you bi-polar. I studied Psychology and in most cases bi-polar people are not empaths. in most cases bi-polar people only react to their own feelings and will flip moods at the toss of a hat. It has nothing to do with anyone other than them and their own emotions. We have someone in the family who is bi-polar and we were always happy around him but in two minutes of a phone conversation he would go from being happy /friendly to "fuck you I want to kill you" mode with noone else being around him and having a pleasant person talking to him. So there is alot more that goes into someone being labeled as bi-polar.

Another thing alot of times kids your sons age will mirror their parents. SO if he sees and hears from you that maybe you are having anxieties sometimes kids will say that/experience it as well.

living with empathy can be difficult especially if you dont understand that the emotions you are experiencing are not coming from you but those around you. but i think that leaving the situation alone could be a bad idea, especially if he turns out to be a projective empath (he can affect the emotional state of those around him, often without knowing it) there are varying degrees of empathy and depending on how much of others emotions he is actually absorbing or incorporating into himself without being aware of it, he could cause personality damage to himself without knowing it. usually control is on an instinctive level but when these controls go they can damage an individual and leave them very imbalanced. there are constant shielding methods for empathy, like anything else that can be learned so that rather than just being open or blocked he will have control over the ability and the anount of input he is recieving. this is ideal because it is a tool that can be used in dealing with others.

i think it is also key that he understands what he is. everyone is empathic to a point but it is not strong in many. this is a gift ir ability to be used just like being good at sports or art, and it needs to be addressed as such, both so it is used correctly and so that the gift is not using him, but also so that he understands what is happening to him and is able to seperate the input of others from himself.

Just for the record he picks up on other people other than just me. But it always seems to be the strongest when we are together. I try to seperate myself from him when I feel a strong emtion come on but he always seems to come to me asking what is going on. I don't have to show or say anything to him he just knows.

I once again want to thank everyone one this thread that posted you have no idea how much you have relieved me I thought i was going crazy and dragging my son with me.

I have read stabb666 articles that is why I had posted this thread. It made me need to ask questions.

i just thought i should make this offer clear.

i would be happy to give you some preliminary ideas on how to help your son deal with his abilities if you like, as well as how to sheild yourself from your son so he does not pick up on what you project so much. i am a projective empath and i think i am pretty well trained. i should at least be able to give you a place to start.

this stands for anyone else as well

I would appreciate any information you can give me that will help!

start with the basics then: just to give a general understanding of abilities.

the capacity for every ability is present in every individual. think of each of these capacities as a doorway. the door is either open or closed. in most cases they are either open or closed. wether or not they will open at a certain time of life is predetermined. they may be forced open, but this is not recommended as it can damage the person. likewise a doorway that is opened may be closed but again this is not recommended as it will damage a person and may also open again at random.

now behind each door is a channel or conduit. the size of the channel determines the amount of energy that can move through it, in other words the strength of the ability. this does not nessicarily correspond to how well the ability is used this is largely a matter of training and a srtonger ability is not always better than subtlty. killing small game with a poleaxe remders the game useless. this is where traning and honig abilities comes into play.

visualization is typically the easiest way to control an ability so i will give you first a way to sheild. forgive me if i start with things you know. and i recommend you try this with yourself first before you try to teach it to your son.

first your center. this is typicially behind your navel but for the purpose you can visualize it anywhere you wish, and however feels more comfortable to you. see this a a point or a ball of light that spins inside you. it spins out all of your energy to yourself and when you chose to those around you. it may change color or spped depending on your mood and how you see it is up to you. but know that it is there and it is where all your energy comes from. it is essentially you, your shape inside your skin.

now your ground. from your center you should establish a ground seen as a cord of energy burying itself deep into the earth. this should always be present, and through it you can send excess or negative energy out of yourself. the trick to control is to alway remember this is there and it can beused at any time.

now the sheild. from your center expand a shell of light or energy to surround yourself. it should enclose you completely including under your feet. your ground connects to this sheild as it passes into the earth. butil this sheild with energy from your center. you can make it thick like a wall of bricks very thin like cellophane or any density you like. this shell holds you and your energy inside and everyone elses energy outside. the thicker it is the more it keeps out the thinner the more it lets in. it can be changed at will to let more or less in.

the last trick to completing your sheild is to give it a texture. if you make it slick or slippery then the things that touch it will slide down it and drain into the earth with your ground if you make it shiny like a mirror or springy then it bounces back or pushes off whatever hits it. and finally if you make it rough or sticky (think velcro) then the energy that comes into contact with it will stick to it, become a part of it, and this you can pull in and use yourself.

the biggest trick to controlling any ability is to believe you can. this is the easiest visualization that i know of that even a child can use. it may take a few tries to accomplish it but with time and remembering it is there it becomes automatic. sheiding for an empath can restore balance and gives a chance to sort yourself from all the outside influences that can crowd the mind and the psyche. i hope this helps. good luck. if there is anything i can clarify please let me know

I just wanted to thank you for sending that info. I think I understand all of it. I will make sure I have mastered it before I even try to explain it to my son.

I guess alot of people are empaths cause even this is just news to me. I'm just catching on.

I think the age one begins to use the ability varies by person.

*smiles*

no need to thank me, if i can help i am glad to, and really this sort of thing should be made common knowledge not some heavily guarded secret, it is something that everyone can use

I'll keep this info in mind, I will thank you anyways. :)

mmmix2

Agree with Sky and Soul re not getting too deep into this with your son, he willlearn as he grows what he may or may not have, trying to explain too much when, with respect, you don't understand your own abilities that well will just confuse and even frightne him.

My journal contains some info re aura cleansing, this is also a way of shielding....as its colours you could make it part of a rainbow game perhaps? done morning and night, wrap him in a 'bubble' of white light, yourself as well.....As you have opened the door to him so to speak you could make a game out of shielding techniques for him : ~ I havan't gone into vast amounts in my journal havent had time, theres a lot of info on th net or emailme and I'll see if I can come up with some more bit for you....

If you dont show him you are concerned for what he can do, he wont be concerned either....as for Dad being away, well, again send a rainbow to keep him well and then just don't make an issue of him being absent. All kids can pick up mums emotions from birth, if he is more aware then he will pick up double....

Thanks If you would please find me a link to start looking I would appreciate it. That game thing sounds like it might work!

Once again to all that have posted I TRUELLY AM GREATFUL FOR IT!

you are welcome.. I just hope that you will take into consideration everything everyone said.

I've been a strong empath my whole life. When I was four my mother tested me by giving me objects with emotions embedded into them (By people wearing them for a long period of time) and asking me how each object made me feel. When I replied accurately for almost every object (about a dozen) Her suspicians were comfirmed. If thats of any help.

The next step with an empath is to learn how to center and shield. *winks*

I am very senative to people emotion. It can be a pain it the bottom most times. I have had it most of life. And I don't think its going anywhere but is growing.

I was about 4 when my mom noticed that, as a person, I would pick up on emotions/energies from other people. Often I would come and wake her up because I knew she was having a bad dream.

Then again, I tend to be somewhat "clairvoyant" so that might be part of it.

But, it's obvious I was just born with that empathetic ability, and it showed early on.


If your son is showing signs of it, encourage it, and let him grow into it...it's hard for a kid to grow in anything he's afraid of or thinks is taboo.

Being an Empath myself iv been able to use my powers for as long as i can remember, i think it depends on the strength of the emotions one is exposed to. If one is exposed to very strong emotions from day 1 then theyll be more likely to show there powers earlier

Usually empaths start to develop their gift during adolescence, so yes 11 would be the right age. I myself started at 12. It may be something else of course. Ask him some questions about his dreams, or feelings about persons he doesn`t know, and then compare his answers to the reality. Or else, try using a light meditation with him and see how that goes.

Thanks again! I am taking into consideration all that has been said in this thread.

I have to be honest here thou I am really unsure where to begin with him. I might consintrate on myself and then after I have the knowledge of what is going on then I will be more able to help him thru it.

Until then I can only be there for him whenever he needs me!

I just want to say thank you to all the ppl on this topic and your helpful explanations about this subject. It explains so much to me about my 'mental condition', my odd mood swings being around ppl or talking to them on the phone etc. Made it all make a lot more sense to me, made me make a lot more sense to me.
I'm definitely gonna read up on empaths, again thank you all for sharing, and mmmix2 good luck with learning to control this gift both you and your son :)

Work on it together-- read together about it, maybe even turn it into some sort of project.

You'll be able to pinpoint things more easily.

Thank you for that suggestion. He is a big school buff so I think that would be a great start as a project.

It sounds to me like you and your son are both empaths. Unfortunately, I have no advice for you. These other people seem to have it covered.

My 11 yr. old daughter is like that, she picks up on everyones emotions especially when they are depressed or sad. So I encourage the gift and help her handle how she is feeling, because sad to say it does effect her in school. We talk about it and I tell her she needs to try and shut them down until she is at home and not at school.

Children usually pick up on things starting very young, but don't know it's different/ don't know how to vocalize it until about 11.
Try the telepathy test.
Think of either black or white. ONLY ONE! Don't think, oh, well, they are going to choose the one I am not thinking of. Only advanced telepaths can pick up on subtlety like that.
Ask them to guess which one you are thinking of. If they get that right, choose a number between one and ten. If they can guess that, with the same amount of accuracy, for like a week or so, then they probably are.

Everyone's comments were so thought provoking and right on - many of us here share this unique gift....I am a 'touch' empath, and for so long when I was young had no idea what was happening, and took friends years later to help me learn and understand - I cannot control it, and not all the time does it happen, but it can wear me down....

Keep your son happy and not show him he's so different from anyone else, but work with him on this gift and for you as well - such excellent advice on this thread :)

interesting..

i don't think you should ask him any questions because he might think that there is something wrong with him. just observe him and see how he picks up on things.

from a psychological developmental perspective, a child could begin exhibiting empath abilities from as early as age 2-5.

Ask questions.
Don't make it like the Spanish inquisition, make it a game. Give prizes.
If he knows about it, he can use it, restrain it, learn about it.
Goddess knows how long it was before I learned how to block others...

I agree with jdenoyon. also let him be a child he will develope on his own later.

Read Doreen Virtue's book on the Crystal Children. They're following the Indigos.

children are more open to emotions and spirits ,and everything else ,I would just belive in your child

I learned when I was seven.

One thing you have to remember, he's a boy...

we are taught (from TV, movies, other male figures) that we aren't supposed to show emotion. so it's going to be particularly hard on him.He's not going to understand whats happing to him.

Being a male empath myself, I know from where I speak.

as far as testing him, the only way I know is with another empath. One that can simulate vivid emotions, if he can pick up on them, the the result it clear.

I hope this helps. If I can help in any way, lust message me.

The idea with another empath seems the best! If not, see if he can pick up emotions from certain people that you know exactly how they feel about something or someone...

I have been an empath for years. In fact I believe possibly sense I was born cause of stories mom told me. Large crowds hurt badly if I am tired or emotionally stress to begin with. Personally I didnt have anyone to turn to except my immediate family. Stress is a major issue with empaths. Watch his reactions. Empaths before they learn how to "block" will get intense emotions for what seems like no reason at all. Its because at times it becomes hard to separate your emotion from everyone else. We do form strong bonds with people and when we are hurt we are normally hit hard. I know when my wife left me my blocks were hard to keep up so my emotions were going crazy.
Comfort is a major need. A beginning empath needs to know they are not crazy. They need to know it is ok to feel everything.

It is a beautiful gift. My friends love the fact I can run to their aid without them having to get into everything but at times I know it can be annoying.
The one thing about being an empath is all emotions are strong.

Please feel free to ask questions. Drop me a message if you ever need anything

Empathy can really begin at any age... I myself didnt get that gift till around the age of 18. Id been seeing auras since I was a baby though. Its different for anyone. My best recommendation is to show patience until the child can learn to shield to an extent whats coming in.