18:21 Apr 29 2019
Times Read: 1,429
‘Something needs to change,’ says mom of baby girl who died at babysitter’s base home
"On military installations, in order to provide child care in a home, providers must undergo stringent reviews and training before being certified and allowed to operate the business. They must undergo fire and safety inspections, and provide a learning curriculum tailored for the child’s age. There are also limitations on the number of children that are allowed at any given time in the provider’s home."
“I didn’t even know about unlicensed care before this happened,” Anna said. “Licensing never came to my mind. I guess I wasn’t really educated. I didn’t have any idea what that was. I had zero indication that was happening.”
“I never felt my children were unsafe. She was just so reliable. I’m usually pretty good at picking up on stuff like that. Now I’m questioning if my gut is not making the right choices for me and my children.”
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Thinking back during the time I had to utilize Day Care for my kids, I did my research prior to obtaining services and I used the military base Family Services as a resource to make my choice since they were the ones responsible for ensuring those they recommended were legit and licensed.
However, I seen how things could go wrong.
While married to my 2nd wife, an issue came up where I was very annoyed that she hadn't kept her promise to accomplish things she said she would prior to my agreeing to marry her. Furthermore, I was really concerned of the lack of care she was giving her own 1 year old son at home where she did nothing but eat and watch soap operas all day until I returned home from work. I would come home to the baby having had fallen and hurt himself, luckily, no bones had ever been broken.
It reached a point where I told her that if she wasn't going to at least clean the house and prepare the meals since she wasn't working nor obtain a driver's license to take herself and her Son to appointments resulting in me having to take time away from my own duties to take her to appointments, that I was going to not be happy all the time having to perform my military duties and then come home and pick up her slack as well.
So what did she choose to do? Get a job as an 'In-Home Day Care Provider'.
Having discovered shortly AFTER marrying her that she wasn't just a "quiet" person, but had been tested to be 'Borderline Mentally Retarded' by her state and had been receiving SSI while holding down a job in her city working for a new paper publishing business where she just inserted that junk advertisement between the pages of the print newspaper (yeah, this was back in 1995), I just knew there was no way this woman would be certified by the base to run an In-Home Day Care, but I had to try and be a supportive spouse so I allowed her to attempt it while sharing with her my reservations.
1st Step, I took her to the Family Service Center (FSC) to enquire about the job, which was in very, very, high demand, and gathered information and I was made aware that as the military Sponsor that I would be responsible for whatever my dependents did, which made me feel very uncomfortable.
The FSC came to my home to inspect and gave me a list of things I had to do to bring our on base home up to standards to run an In-Home Day Care. Things such as installing safety latches on cabinet doors, incerting plastic covers into electrical outlets and the most challenging of them all, build a chain link fence in the backyard! WTF? It was base housing, why didn't they do this shit? Nooo....I had to go to Home Depot and purchase the required crap including the tools I needed and ask for advice how to do this. Digging holes and placing the poles in the ground with cement which I'm happy I was able to find laying around where someone had left for anyone to utilize. It was a very strenuous undertaking for my first time, but it came out great and passed the inspection.
However, I get a call from her saying that she had gotten her first customer through the FSC when I knew she hadn't even taken one class required of her to start her business.
I immediately when to the FSC and asked how could this be? I was told that the demand for Child Care is so great that they "waived" the requirement for certification 'before' care for other people's children since she already had a child of her own and can take the classes "as she goes". WTF? They ask me if I had any concerns since I'm the "Military Sponsor". Hell yes I had concerns. I didn't want her caring for other people's kids since what would be required of her was never seen by me with her own child, but they were willing to give her a chance.
Within one week, my then wife had not only her 1 year old to care for, but 2 other toddlers and an infant.
I remember driving home during lunch time and didn't call to give her prior notice and all I heard from outside the home was kids crying. I enter the house and see the toddlers fighting over toys in the front room, and she sitting on the couch watching soap operas while the infant was on another couch crying.
I was furious!
I had some choice words for her and returned to work.
The following week we were able to secure early so I went home as was half asleep when the mother of the infant came to pick up her child. She was not happy that her child's diaper had not been changed and apparently not for some time.
That week I was called back to the FSC in order for them to report to me that my spouse had not 1 but 2 reports of neglect and they wanted my input as to how they should proceed.
Really?
I told them I addressed my concerns with them allowing my then wife to care for other people's kids when what was required of her was never seen happening with her own child and that I had a feeling she only wanted this "job" because she felt it would lessen the pressure she was feeling coming from me of her now contributing to the family and that I knew when she failed the certification that this little attempt of hers would fall through, but nooooooooooo......the FSC assigned kids to her care without her taking one class. So I wasn't surprised to know she had negative reports made on her.
I was told that their course of action would be to suspend her services and will be by to inform her personally.
When they came over to inform my then wife of her suspension, she cried and said that she would just quit.
The FSC said their purpose wasn't to terminate her services, but just suspend them until she received the appropriate training and credentials, but she knew she wouldn't pass so she just quit all together.
Things could have been a lot worse.
That's why the above story triggered my memories and emotions about parents just not doing the proper research before turning over the care of their kids to other people.
If you have kids and you need to work resulting in needing Day Care, do your fucking research! Oh, and yeah, expect to work just to pay for the care of your kids. ijs
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