The Ultimate Vampire Resource and Directory

I modestly propose that you look into ceasing your satire, lest you, like Aristophanes of old, face the slings and arrows of the VR illuminatus. Terrible and potent is the unwashed wrath of the masses, who are obviously all to be counted amongst such an elite group.

Hmm, I don't know... Child recipe books are always good in my opinion. Roast small annoying child with apple sauce is a good standby for those unplanned dinner parties:)

today's kids are too fat for a roast, but they make great chili.

or cup of toilet paper...and i mean that non-rudely.



i think it's cute, but then again, "toilet humor" is one of my driving forces...



..or is it farces?



hmmm.

I'd like one lump of sugar please =]

I do love satire. I just could not come up with any comments worthy of your composition or anything that could follow such a distinguished panel.

Fold your rolls in honour of the forward facing sheet!

I would like to try one of your beers, Ms.

Dem's good beers, dat fo sho!

The grounds will drink of the blood of the back-rollers, the grass will choke upon their entrails, gasping for light under the treacherous weight of their corpses. Their villages will burn in righteous flame, and no hiding hole of their ill-begotten breed will escape our notice. There is no God who will grant mercy upon them, no loving Father to hear their cries. Only the cold steel of our cause will bear witness to their final ignominious moments.

Well-said, brother!

I'm probably going to get blinded for saying this, but isn't the back rolling where it dispenses from the back side of the roll?



If so, the back rolling is far more convenient. It allows for easier rollback if one accidentally unravels too much. I am a back roller for precisely that reason. No need to to be a front roller, because if you pull out too many sheets, t'is a pain to roll them back with any degree of neatness. I take a great deal of pride in a perfectly rolled toilet roll, and the only way to achieve this consistently is to be a back roller.



Although for me there is an issue of even greater significance. Those who leave the toilet seat up, and those who politely put the seat back down.



---



:P

I really don't care about which way the paper hangs.... I'm more interested in the battle between folders and crumplers.



I mean, to not fold your toilet paper neatly before wiping is just a waste. You can't efficiently use the same paper by folding it back over and crumplers are far more likely to end up with the dreaded brown finger.



UNITE AGAINST THE CRUMPLERS!!!!!

Don't you see how ridiculous you are, Birra and Genesis? I have laid out the crux of the matter and you want to apply your rationalizations. Get over yourselves! I am yelling loudly about this VERY important matter...telling everyone, and sticking unsolicited opinions upon their profiles and portfolios. I am commenting journals with my personal agenda.



You are both obviously immoral back-rollers trying to cause drama and distract me from my noble cause. There is no room for you on VR to disagree with me. You need to get lives. I will spend hours, days, months, and years upon VR if I need to, never logging off...just to prove how ridiculous you are! I laugh at your thoughts and insist to you that I am the clever one here.



My next step is to make a stamp with my amazing crest and plaster it all over the database. "MINIMA MAXIMA SUNT!"

I am truly shocked at your attack on the backside rollers. This country was founded on the ideals that even the lowliest inbred country bumpkin without opposing thumbs is entitled to their preferences, regardless of how misguided they are.



Maybe they are uninformed, and do not realize that their blasphemy and heresy in their ways puts them lower than the spawn from a witch’s toilet.



I believe it is your duty as a humanitarian to head not a crusade but a campaign to educate the unwashed masses on the proper mounting of the roll as God intended.

No. You cannot "teach" a back-roller the way of Truth, any more than you can teach a mouse to be a lion. No, the only true route is to put them to the blade, ending their despicable taint upon this land. They shall not be suffered to take from our air the very first breath that defends their sinful path.

VanDick... what an unfortunate name.

I was always confused by that prayer. Wouldn't we want God to keep our soul if we should die?

Not when I was a little kid. The prayer made me kinda scared that he was predatory, just waiting for me to nod off so WHAM he could snag my soul! I wasn't sure what a soul was, but I damn well understood, "MINE!"

Brightening my day, as always.....

It's been a long time since a journal entry has made me snrk my coffee...

lmao .........yep hes been waiting for a date for over a year now, about time we got something new to look at :)

Domina Martyria looks way too much like 80's Madonna for me to think shes cute. Plus...a name like Martyria...gee any drama there, you think?

And Sevenn, she sure stepped WAY out on the ol' quote limb for GOTHICmatch "I'm here looking for gothic ppl"



God, text me an aspirin, bff. I M 2 annoyed.

LOL I wanted to take a marker to Cherokee picture- some horns, glasses.

...don't forget the windows and dusting the bathroom floor... ;)

I know how you feel. My son is over 2 inches taller than I. He places things out of my reach now.

That must suck. =P

*Hands Joli a big cookie* It sucks doesn't it? I cheat and pay H&R Block.

I did it for free!

Congrats!

OK and kudos to the photographer...but about the rest of all that...and I dont say it often, but FUVKV that! I do NOT do well with bridges of any size or shape. A 24 mile bridge can kiss my arse. I relate to the windshield hammer, but more to the point, I would never move to a place that would require a windshield hammer. no, no, no, no, no. The end.

the photo is incredible. Wonderful composition. I give at least as much credit to the photographer as the camera.

Nice picture.



It would have been more impressive if your daughter was the one driving.



A number of the photos in my portfolio have been taken while driving. While I was driving.



Always an experience....



But the picture is lovely... I can imagine the drive on the causeway is pretty horrible... take the camera and practice.. carefully!

Given the circumstances, very nice shot. :)

Standing at the Grand Canyon, I had the urge to let go and fall...When I stand on bridges, I feel the same.



And that is an impressive picture...It's so level!

Oh and don't listen to Birra's bragging. When he takes pictures as he's driving, he's all over the place. Old ladies are wetting themselves, Men's prostates leap behind their livers...It's a big mess.

My daughter just soaked up all your compliments. she spent excessive amounts of time trying to decode Sevenn's expletive, to no avail. She suggested that lovely MR. Birra is right and she should have the keys. And when she read Morri's post, she reminded me of one of my famous lines to my Sunday school class as I was teaching about Paul's vision. Paul was "prostate before the lord."

O.O ...Wow..hah

I always thought it was Howard. 'Dear Heavenly Father, Howard be thy name...'

HAH! Howard...Nice.



He heard that you know...He'll be waiting with the paddle.

Sometimes it's not your fault. It's just how life is... a big rush! =p

I believe that even if we communicate ''well'' people tend to misinterpret our thoughts, especially when writte.



Example, on-line it's easier to misinterpret words, cause someone can be just kidding and the person takes that seriously considering taht s/he can't hear their tone of voice.



Sometimes I even think that even spoken words ruin communication. I don't think we are completely clear to express what it is in our mind when we speak, because thoughts run much faster than words, even when we are assertive.

I believe we exercise a little of them all when we communicate. But the whole subject of communication is very complex.

A lot is also to do with not what we say or how we say it but how that person sees you.

I think most people who are capable of self reflection and realizing exactly what they have get that little voice nagging at them.



Try just turning what it says into...Knowing that things change...Appreciate what you have regardless of whether or not you may lose it.



Trust me...It doesn't make losing those things hurt any less...But it makes those moments you had them mean so much more...*sigh*

Everyone gets it - it is how you deal with it that counts. and you do :-)

We are all mortal creatures with our own flaws and our strengths. While it is good to reflect upon our blessings (be it the fruit of hard work or luck), it is best to separate the past from the present and the present from the future.

I agree with TheHellequin, indeed. Then again my voices tell me to also get naked and run around my house singing "I am a witch I am a witch"

Four out of five voices in my head tell me that it's time to eat dinner.

I've fought against that voice my whole life.



The voice serves a purpose; because of it I work harder, I strive for more, I set goals that other might deem unreachable but I see them as rungs in the ladder to something else.



Every so often, I sit in my car alone, reflecting on life.. and that little voice makes my stomach turn inside-out.



But, there is worse company to have. ;)