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Were we done discussing this yet? Well even if we were I'm opening another one anyway, I always got plenty more to say!

Anyway, for those who missed it, I think we were talking about the younger generation on VR and how they act around the older people.

To be honest, I think this is always a topic worth discussing (which is why this topic is by far the most I've ever posted in a single thread, lol). And Lyssa: I agree with your point before the last thread was closed: Pushing "adult fun" on people who are not adults - online or not - is completely wrong and inexcusable.

the thing i hate is where it says age put your age or date of burth come on how really is going to take the time to work to get it and if you dont want to talk to somebody because there so much older then you then block them but that way the ones on here that like to flurt can and not worry about geting in to trubel

hehe i think this is the most i've replied too

it's just respectful to ASK someone before you try to role play/ date/ have sex with someone

i mean really, how many people walk up to a random stranger and hump them?

just because this is a website and just because you CAN message someone, doesn't mean you SHOULD have the right to sex them up with out their permission

Heh.

I'm just grateful to make new friends, I don't need to be sexing them

i am not trying to sex anybody up but its nice to know before hand what i can and cant say to them so i dont even have to worry about it

*chuckles* well i think that's great that you don't need to be sexing your friends ;]

i know what you mean Tyrtheoldone
;]
i wasn't implying YOU did that ;]
my real birthdate is on my profile, because people have thought i was younger.
age has nothing to do with friendship, but yes i'd rather a teenager didn't try to 'sex me up' ;]

I'm sorry, but the visual of some random person walking up to another random person and humping them made me laugh a little. Thank Goddess we don't act like that! I just don't like blocking people, it makes me feel bad for whatever reason...

So the question is, do we just leave the site as it is, or do we somehow try and improve it? Not that I know how, don't look at me for answers. I'm only stimulating your braincells. ;-)

I know what you mean: Fortunately I haven't had to make use of the "Block" feature, and I hope it stays that way, lol.

Yeah, that visual made me laugh a little too ...

i would say just be honest about it if you want to have others be honest with you thats the best way to go about it

*grins* i was hoping that image would cause some laughter ;]
i don't know of anyway to regulate what someone says to someone else even though it IS in poor taste
*looks to Lyssa for answers*
;]

It would be very nice if we could improve on these things, but I don't really see how, unfortunately.

People can lie about their age, and the only way to really stop harassment here is to block someone.

Like I said, it's unfortunate, but I think that's really the only option that I can think of : (

Well I can not speak for others just for myself. As a parent of a Minor here on VR I monitor what my child does constantly while online, and not just here.

I have taken the time to make sure she reads the Manual and the TOS and encourage her to ask questions. She has done her profile and portfolio, with very little help from me other then html coding.

Heck she even has some rules listed on her profile.

I trust her but I still have to be the responsable adult in my household and watch her. I have shown her how to block people and encourge her to tell people who message her, that she finds unsavory, to please leave her alone.

She is curious about things here on VR but as part of my responsabilites I try to educate her and encourage her to ask questions. Let me tell you she has had some off the wall ones.. lol.. but I digress..

I let her know that in no uncertain terms that she will be respectful to people here on VR reguardless of their age and that I am watching. She is to follow certain rules that I set because I will not be afraid to eliminate VR from her online time.

I see to many running around doing this or saying that.. Personaly it scares me sometimes, the things that I see from some of the poeple here on VR, and not just the Young ones.

If ever my child, who goes by the name WolfBite, is disrepectful to people tell me.. I will deal with it. But know this.. she does not come online to VR without me present.. So by the time you can tell me she has done something to offend or upset you, I more then likely have already ganked her access to the net.

all i can say is i wish more parents were like you and i HOPE that when i am a parent i can be half as good as you are SilverBow
and yes, i agree again that it's not just young people that cause the issues

agreed.

all bow down to Silverbow for actualy being responsible for her child i wish more perants where like that thank you your kids will be better off for it to

Why must we take to this subject when they make up a good percentage of this site, keeping it going by getting others into it....

Silverbow: I think it's awesome that you pay so close attention to what your daughter does online. I truly think that is the best answer, and more parents should take such an active role in what their kids are doing online.

I thought of another possible solution to these problems: What about VR moderators for messages? Although I do understand that it could be hard finding people willing to donate so much of their time doing this.

Also, after reading Silverbow's messages, I have a question for you all: Considering all of the horror stories we hear about what has happened to young people after meeting someone online, why does it seem that so many parents are not doing all they can to watch what their children are doing online? Do you think it is because many parents do not care enough or is it just because they don't understand how big the problem is? I'm very interested to hear everyone's thoughts on this.

i think you should start a thread about that

and as for taking to this thread
it's more about reminding myself that just because someone doesn't respect me there is much more to this site that i love and many many more people who are excellent people

the problem comes in with there parents my i know my mother didnt really get watched over much because of the time she grow up in and because of that parents today take the same out look on it so now that there is a problem they dont know what to do.

I appreciate the words of encouragement. As I am typing this she is going "your talking about me again arnt you?" and I said "Yep, have you finished rating all the people who where kind enough to rate you?" She said "almost"

I cant keep her from VR, she see's me here all the time.. She watches what I do, over my shoulder, so that keeps me in line as well.

I am not the greatest parent in the world, no one is, but I try.. I want both my kids to be responsable adults and to do that, they have to be responsable children. Part of that is letting them make mistakes but I have to set the limits..

And trust me.. homework has to be done, chores.. some outside time.. all kinds of things. LOL and I have just been informed that I am the EVIL Parent. I accept that, heck I have worked hard for that title.

your daughter is going to grow up to be a very responsible adult, i have no doubts about that
and you are right, no one is perfect. we have to do the best we can though and i feel you are doing a great job.
again, i wish more parents were like you, even if you are the evil one ;]

Silverbow: *Laughs* Well, you sound like a terrific parent to me! Looking back, I wish my parents had cared enough to take such an active role in my life : )

Thanks for the idea, Raynne: Yeah, you're right, I guess that should be a seperate thread, lol!

but if you notice the young ones are the ones that cause the most trouble...them and the buddies they bring with them...and actually mostly everyone i know are over 18......or will be 18 soon enough......

do you know i have my age and birthdate on my pro and they still come to me thinking i am 16!! but when i tell them im 23 with 2 kids they are like omg wow you dont look it you are so hot ....some of them keep hitting on me, others either leave me be or get the hint.....

i'll admit that a lot of people who have done the same to me have been under 18
but not ALL
and i don't assume that because some have that the next one will too.

btw that was to DW's post

yeah i know :)
i just have to put my two cents worth in anyway ;]

Ok I am a flirt I love to flirt I love to make people laugh its clean fun and I don’t expect people to want to meet me or anything. But I would like to know what to say to the other person what not to say if I should if I shouldn’t I try my best to just be funny and it usually works out I do have a couple of people on my friends list that are under 18 but most of them are over 18 and I like it that way I know what to say to them and how to talk to them with out feeling like I am a creep or anything.

yeah i had my fair share of adults do it too...

i have plenty of friends that are like 16-17.....mainly because they have the respect to realize 1 im 23, 2 im in a serious relationship already.....

and anyone that actually reads my profile knows that, unfortunately a lot see your pics and just message right away...

I think part of that might be that the roudy ones think it's "just online" and that we aren't "real people." That seems to be a lot of the problems these days..

indeed

or they think it cant do no harm, you dont know them or where they are.....

you are right neonate
all we are is some words and maybe some images
i personally don't think of anyone here that way, so i didn't realize that could very well be the case

Don't always rely on the parents to supervise when they need supervision themselves..............



ITN news 3 April 2007

Woman offered daughter for sex

A mother in the US has been arrested after allegedly offering her seven-year-old daughter for sex and pornographic pictures.

The 33-year-old woman was arrested at a hotel near Detroit airport after she was met by an undercover police officer.

Sheriff Warren Evans said: "This certainly is very close to the top of the list in terms of the most disgusting cases I've ever been involved in."

He continued: "She solicited herself over the internet as a prostitute but, as the investigation continued, talked about her children, specifically one seven-year-old that she was prepared to have posed in sexually exploitative positions."

Officers say they found various outfits for a young girl in the woman's car.

The woman can't be named to protect the child's identity.

She now faces five charges including child sexually abusive behaviour and illegal use of the internet. She denies all the charges.

ugh
that's horrible :/
i cannot understand how a mother can do that :/
i do NOT understand these sickos at ALL
that poor child

oh my!
that is disgusting...

I think everyone on the site should just watch themselves. If another person seems interested then fine, flirt all you want. But don't try and force anything on anyone...whether they be older or younger than the other person. Being uncomfortable works both ways. So does the blocking. Lets keep that in mind. And if you don't like flirting or whatever, then say so right at the top of your profile. If they don't read it and you yell at them, then so be it. It's their own fault.

i dont know if my thoughts on that topic should be shared but lets just say pain and lots of it is needed in there punishment for something like that

hehe that's a very practical solution rogue599 :)
i hope some who have problems take that advice

Sabre: That's so awful. I don't know how anyone could possibly do that to a child, much less their OWN child - I hope that scum gets locked up for life.

Some of you know where I work ; it's so soul destroying when a child is giving evidence against eg. her farther in a child abuse case and you hear her say "Daddy , why are you lying ? "

That's discusting.. anyone doing that should be made incabable of making any more children...

i love how you get right to the heart of matters PiNkLuSt
that's exactly what it comes down to

Silverbow you are to be congratulated for your diligence in watching over your child and I too wish more parents would do so.

Vamp3434 in one of your posts you asked
"Also, after reading Silverbow's messages, I have a question for you all: Considering all of the horror stories we hear about what has happened to young people after meeting someone online, why does it seem that so many parents are not doing all they can to watch what their children are doing online? Do you think it is because many parents do not care enough or is it just because they don't understand how big the problem is? I'm very interested to hear everyone's thoughts on this."
I have some thoughts on this, I'm afraid most of it is sheer lazyness on the part of the parents who have increasingly become sure that someone else will take care of things like that. This confidence in "the system" taking care of everything bad that could happen, coupled with the "it'll never happen to my child" mindset keeps them safe from becoming involved in actually protecting their kids. Then there are the parents who simply are outclassed by their kids in the use of computers and the internet. With computer usage being taught in school these days from early on, many children quickly outdistance their parent's skills. I hate to say this but a great many parents that I know with kids of the perfect age to be taken advantage of have no ideal what places like myspace and others even are, much less how much information their kids may be giving out or taking in. There are no easy answers to this problem but I don't think it would hurt for the government to offer free internet usage classes at the local librarys where pc's are already set up. These would need to be offered at different hours and days where working parents can attend them to learn how to watch over their kids. While I do hate to suggest more government involvement in our daily lives I think in this case it could be a help.

Oh certainly Nightgame. I agree with you there. But come on, how many parents do you think will actually go? I know mine wouldn't. Also, I think some parents just plain don't know that they're kids are on sites that are potentially dangerous. They don't mean to be so lazzy, they just are out of sheer ignorance. Lets face it, how many kids tell their parents the truth about what they're doing? I know that I've lied to mine a plethora of times about what i was doing online. This was back in the day, and now that I'm older they trust that i won't do anything dumb. But still, kids get themselves into bad situations these days, and a lot of times parents just don't know.

Yeah, I guess there is no real solution... That's slightly depressing.

keep your chin up :)
i think the decent people far out weigh the bad ;]
i know it sucks to get a bunch of pervy messages

Raynne, you're right! Well what I've concluded so far is this.

13 is a good age limit. However it doesn't work because people lie.

Age is a number and a lot of older people are dumb too!

Anything else you want to add?

Thanks Raynne :)

I like to get to the point no bullshit! When it comes down to it grouping it by age is just as bad as doing against sex or race. Am I wrong? It's just my opinion, and this is what forums are for.

Good topic Lyssa it's been a while since I found a thread to post in this section. ^_^

Pinklust, I don't thin you do enough posting! LOL JK!

I don't know that I'm just grouping b age. Technically I'm not that far removed from the group I'm "judging" or what have you. Maybe I am, and that really wouldn't be good!

Most times there isn't a good solution...not one that everyone can agree on since they all have their own way of doing things and raising their children. And to many of them just don't care anymore...which I think is the most depressing part.

I don't belive that parents don't care. I think they just don't know! They don't know what their kids are kids are getting into. Yeah they are there to protect them, but you can't shelter a kid to death either.

I'm not saying anyone is judging I just think it's wrong to, was what I was trying to get across.

i say as long as they respect u and dont cause any trouble they're ok

I've come across both. And sometimes it's just how their raised. Some parents I know don't even want to know...they care and love them...but if their child doesn't tell them about something, they don't ask about it either.

ihavenoidea what in the hell are you doing? that's just pathetic...

lets face it, some people are just born with an ability to piss you off, and so far thats all I've ran into on here, is a few young kids trying there best to make me mad, but all I can do is laugh at them for being so ridiculously childish and wish I was young again.

I don't really want to divide people into younger and older. I've met a lot of immature older people on here. They are childish and don't understand that you still have to have some manners when you are online.

Vampire Rave is an adult site. By the policy that Cancer made, members that are thirteen and above may join. There is no vote or policy that members can make that can chance this. Period. It is not up for discussion - it is policy. This site is monitored. If you have a problem with any member, either pm them or block them. It's that simple. ~ billy

Billy, I'm sorry but I think you completely missed the point. We aren't trying to take over VR or change anything. It was only a discussion.

I know i am just coming into this thread but with the age thing i think ages should be posted, more effectively ppl should dread them. i have received a few emails form ppl on here wanting to have basically cyber sex or to meet and then they they tell me they are 14. i have a daughter older than that. yeah ok that would happen. not. i use this site as making friends and finding out cool info on the dark-side. if i want cyber sex i would log on to the porn sites. i think some just come here for one thing and one thing only well when you make your profile you should then read what this site is all about and if it is not what you want close yourself out. i am sure i strayed off the topic but once i was reading replies this is what i got. lol. continue please......

if members here wanna have cybersex with each other it is ok by me but ofcourse it shouldn't be the reason to be on this site. BUT I have to say that younger ones shouldn't be doing this it could onley backfire at them. so I find that EACH member either the age of 13 or even 98 must place their date of birth in their profile, then at least you know against who you are talking to so by this I bid to everyone just place your correckt birthdate or at least the correct year in your profile
don't go telling crap like 'it's rude to ask a girl her age or gues (this go's for boys and girls)

look I have friends here who are 14-15 and they are good persons I judge not by age but I do watch my tongue when talking to them

Nope, that's exactly it! I agree with you hun, 100%.

thanx sweety
I just hope that people would listen to what I said

1. i dont think there is nothing annyone can do to stop underage ppl from doing anything, they find a way around it always....they (not being mean by saying they) use their brains to over come something that is barred from...in a way it's good that they are using their brains.

2. i think it's wrong or unfair if ppl use the web rooms to just have sex....if someone wants that sort of thing use msn or yahoo keep it in prv. most ppl come here to make friends and thats all....some of us are married and either one of the party has invited the other....i dont believe these ppl should be using sites like this for sex. keep these places for what they are ment for....to make friends.

And most importantly! If you're going to cyber with someone. MAKE SURE IT'S EFFING LEGAL! Moreover, ASK!

indeed hun that is exacly what need to be done
cyber all you want hel if you like to mention it in your profile or whatsoever but at least take the efford to ask if the other person would like to cyber and keep it legal so I don't wanna hear some 40 year old is sending pervert messages to an underaged girl (and however I am talking about wil know I mean him)

I agree totally with you, Cerberius.

I myself am a bartender in real life and yes i am a flirty person by nature and by professional interest. A bartender who flirts gets more tips. (yes it works like that) But just like in real life i make sure that i know how old someone is before starting to flirt. I wouldn't flirt with a 13 year old in real life so i won't do it here either.

So yes you are right it is important to know who you are talking too. and how old they are.

i think if someone wants to cyber take it else where....msn or yahoo keep it in ur own space

Yup, in a lot of ways people are ore free and relaxed and online, and that's wonderful. But I still believe there are certain boundaries that perhaps should not be crossed.

True enough but i am a strong believer in freedom of speach. Every one sets there own boundaries. It is up to us to RESPECT each others boundaries.

darkangel I agree 100% with you
I hope people wil read our words and keep them in mind

Thank you. I hope so as well.

What it comes down to, like almost always, is respect. If we respect eachother we would not bother them with things they tell us they don't like.

that is indeed true
by doing this many discusion can be avoided and many fights as well

wel all we can do now is wait and hope

Very true indeed, my friend

See the only thing I mind about the whole age deal, is those pervert 35 year old dudes who try hitting on little 15 year old girls! Eww flirt with someone your own age, cause most 15 year old girls are stil nieve er however you spell it. I think that is the only issue I have, but it's not like you can tell when someone is being honest about their age, you just have to use common sense... a lot of people don't have that thought. *sighs*

True but lets say someone tells you they are over 18 and start to flirt with you. Then they have made clear that they are ok with it. If later it turns out they are 13, that's their responsibility not yours.

Everyone is free to live their lifes they way the want to. Do you disagree that two consenting adults should have the right do make love if they want to? Or cyber, or whatever they want?

As long as it is consensual, again respect, i have no objections to what sort of behaviour at all. Just keep it private.

Exactly PinkLust! That's so gorss! Hell, even 35 year old hitting on 17 year olds! It's wrong. If people would take the time to look at a profile once and a while...

After I stepped out of this discussion yesterday I pulled WolfBite aside and went over the rules again. Making sure she understands.

She has also added a message to her profile that asks for people to respect her and not send her inappropriate messages. He birth month and year have ALWAYS been on her site..

And to the person who sent me the "lovely" little note.. you have been blocked not just on my side but on hers as well.

my mom doesn't really monitor what i do because she has a certain level of trust knowing i won't give out any personal info out to anybody.

but she freaked out when she found out i had an account her she didn't like the idea of me being on a website that has a vampire theme etc.

Hmm, I don't think thirty five is too old to be hitting on girls..any female below the age of consent yes, but, 17+ fair cop..

The very young members should be monitored by their parents, what they can be exposede to here by a very slow message-by-message system is nothing like what they can be exposed to on MSN, Yahoo ...

This site is one of the best monitored vampire communities I have come across. If a younger member has a problem they have a bunch of admins to go to - Cancer can, and does, enforce his abuse policy - there is a very effective 'block' button for instant protection.

People who want to try 'adult' things online should make sure they know who they are dealing with. If they can't do this, they should sit on their hands.

There is quite a wait before message and forum posting restrictions are lifted, the wait is long enough to put off people who are just out to cause trouble in a moment of boredom.

Causing trouble and being young, do NOT go together

Yup, but the thing is most parents don't watch their kids. And it isn't VR's job to baby-sit, not at all. But then who do we hold responsible when something bad happens? The kid who didn't know any better, the parent that didn't keep a close enough eye, or the website where the child was exposed to negative things? As human beings I believe it's in our nature to want to blame something or someone should anything go wrong...

I think i posted on the last one but.I do find it unnerving having younglings like 13 yrs etc on here.but you just have to be discerning when greeting them.I personally would like to see a min age of 16.but thats only my opinion.fare play for posting this though lylla.

Sorry lyssa.got your name wrong.apologies.

No worries hun, sometimes I spell my name wrong too! ^_^

Don't tell me no one has anything to say. I'll have to come up with a new topic then! Too much work!

Lyssa said - But then who do we hold responsible when something bad happens?

I think it would go without saying that if a parent doesn't watch their child's activity, then they (plus any offending party breaking the sites terms of service) would be to blame. I also think that one has to ask just how blameless a 13, 14 or 15 year old child is for their own actions online. Surely we can afford them a little responsibility for their actions. I think if you ask them, they'd be rather offended at the prospect of someone saying that they're defenseless babes in the wood.

Absolutely Felix. But if they're never taught the dangers of online predators...

Then they've either been living in a cave or with the Amish.

I don't think that parents can take all the responsibility for their chlidrens online access, unless their child is always using the internet at home in which case of course they should be. There are always going to be young people who bend the rules of what they should be doing and there's nothing their parents can do about it. The issue is with people who encourage them to keep doing it

That too. I think parents can be held responsible for teaching their kids the dangers of the internet. Mine certainly did. They never know what I'm doing online, but they trust me enough to make wise decisions.

And lets not forget about the kids who live with their grandparents or whatever who wouldn't even know how to turn a computer on. There's all kinds of people out there who don't know the first thing about computers.

Hmm...I don't know. This thread seems kind of pointless to me because it's not going to change anything. You can't tell people to just start acting more mature. All anyone here can do is just complain and that's a waste of time.

We have to deal with morons or immature people everywhere everyday. It's just part of life. Telling people they need to respect others has only halfway worked in the past. If someone bothers you, block them. If someone rates you low...Get over it.

I remember "back in the day" threads like these were deleted right away too....

A thread is never pointless unless it has a redundent topic. The forum is here so everyone can express their opinions, it might not change anything but look how much people get to into this. It's never a waste to here someone out!

Hmmm, yeah...

Young vs. old? Is this really a fair topic. HOw are you going to differentiate people by their ages? I"ve been here for a year and a half, and I think I've learned alot from the elder crowd, but it the older people I find most at home with. It's the older people who can console me and tell me that things will be better. It is the older crowd that I can connect with, not the younger crowd.

And no on vr, almost all of the younger crowd son't even understand this site. They think it is a game, and in a way it is, but in a way it is life.

This thread has been automatically closed for length.